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https://storiesonline.net/n/36875/the-new-foal-a-pony-girl-story/14
My friend Mike McGifford came up with the idea that started Foal. In his original draft, he mentioned a man named Eddie Davidson in casual conversation - but never any details about him.
I've been writing most of Foal, and decided to finally introduce him as my alter-ego and in this chapter I added a picture for your edification.
It's a boner killer for sure, but I think it adds something to the story. They say a picture is worth 1000 words, but it doesn't actually add to the word count of the story.
It does though add a little something to help provide background. Tolkien added maps, and there are some illustrations on covers and inside books just to give enough to help paint the world for the reader.
That's my goal with AI art - its fun to create. I normally do stuff that's sexual in nature, but I decided for one to do a self portrait.
One other thing that I added to this story is a powerful metaphor about shaping raw iron into something more - more valuable through the process of what some may consider pain and trouble.
I can't take credit for this idea. I saw a brilliant craftsman explain that the iron spike he was using had been sitting in the ground minding it's own business. When the spike is introduced to heat (The pain of life/trouble) it may ask "Why me? I did not ask for this".
And the pain shapes it, makes it brittle and easy to mold into something else. It is that crucible process that shapes all of us and can make us into a lump of mush, or something new and even stronger than before.
I know, that's deep, right? This is supposed to jerk off story about sexy hispanic girls that dress up like ponies and prance around with their tits out.
I thought that message was so powerful, that I enshrined it in this chapter, and it is for that reason that it is one of my favorites of all time.
A lot of my stories have fetish elements that some people find distasteful and that's okay, not everything is for everyone. However, I really think this particular chapter would appeal to many even if you arent into kinky leather stuff and elaborate shibari rope bondage.
I've been on SOL long enough to have written 72 stories, many of which are over 30 chapters, some approaching 75 chapters like my latest NIS: Breeder Program
When I began, I didn't have MS Word or any spell check, and I suspect my early stuff was pretty rough on the eyes grammatically.
I have better tools and grown as an author, but the same toxic people who were there day one to knock me down and try to encourage me to give up, are still here - the names may have changed but the tactics have not.
I don't think the voting system on this site accurately reflects the quality of stories, mostly due to the behavior of trolls. There is probably a lot of outliers of 1 or 10, and the 1 is probably from someone who simply ignored story codes, plodded into the story and said "Wait, this has (X) in it and I hate (X)...Down Vote!"
It is a story, it's just NOT for you. You don't have to punish it. Just move on, if you can't objectively rate the prose/grammar/plot structure.
I used to love the idea of collaborative writing, and on some level I still do. I used to feed off of the comments when I wrote "Do you have a big dick, why not?" and "Big Day at Sunny Manor" and even weave some of the suggestions into the story.
However, more often than not, I got a snotty gram from someone emboldened by the anonymity of the Internet to tell me in great detail why they wouldn't read the story - rather than just depart and move on like a good fellow.
Not everything is for everyone, and I've been pretty clear my stuff is for a particular kind of pervert. Most of my fans are engineers or analysts in some way. I am not sure why that is, but perhaps it's because I am.
I hate to think that I write a trope style, but I am sure that I have a "sub-genre" of interests that while I consider them broad, many of my stories reflect common themes.
As an example, I often write an alter ego of myself into the story in the form of a young man or father, and think about the story from their perspective.
In order to broaden that, I really do thrive when people write to me and suggest "hey, what about this direction for the plot instead?"
Sifting through the public comments though is like sifting cat litter for gold, when it's mostly just cat shit that you'll find.
I had experimented on NIS: Breeder and turned on comments. I had about seven pages, and honestly, most of it was awesome. Periodically, I'd go and read them, and if someone thought so poorly of my work they'd go the to trouble of writing a little snotty gram, I could click "Ban from ever commenting on my stories" and delete it and move right along.
Very satisfying.
It would be all the better if I could click "Ban from READING my stories or contacting me" but you take what you can get.
However, recently a few of the toxic trolls have become too emboldened. Unhappy with themselves, they lash out to tear others down.
"I only open this to look at the AI pictures and those are shit as well" type of comments, which are better left unsaid. I am glad they get off on the AI pictures, and if they don't want to read the story, I am fine with that too.
You see? and since I have little interest in what this troll enjoys, why should I hear about what they do? Why should anyone?
So, experiment ended - no more public comments.
However, I'm always game to talk to people who want to engage on my stories, make suggestions, catch mistakes I made in continuity or grammar, etc.
Now, it will be solely through the "Contact author" button.
I especially like it when a fellow author takes the time to reach out and offer some thoughts.
We (most of us anyway) do this for free, and we enjoy sharing our little fantasies with people for probably a multitude of reasons. In return, getting that validation from feedback freely given from readers to make my stories better and more diverse, is a really satisfying reward.
I don't need anyone to blow smoke up my ass and tell me I am the best author. I know that I am not.
Am I trying to be the best author?
Probably not either, if I were I'd set up a Patreon and try to make this my living.
However, just getting someone to take a few minutes of their time to provide some good feedback is great. That's something to aspire to.
The few readers who have stuck with me over the years and offer feedback, is a very small group of grognards who keep me going.
Years ago, someone wrote to me to complain about the direction of my story. At first, I was upset, but I realized something.
They were not angry with me, not really. They were mad that their favorite characters were going down a path they felt was bad for them.
What an honor!!
It's kind of like if you made Captain Kirk grow a mustache. The character is so iconic and beloved, that many people might not like it. They are not as much mad as they are passionate that the character stay true to the readers perception of them.
If you write characters no one gives a fuck about, and have them do something in the story that puts them in peril, no one will give a crap.
He was writing because he had an emotional reaction to a character I made real for him through our shared imagination. How cool is that?
I got to experience the feeling of accomplishment, because someone thought enough to write to me a very strongly worded email about the direction of the story.
That's one I didn't mind at all. it's the toxic "You are shit, this is shit, eat shit, you dumb shit" type of comments or the "I am not reading this!" from the dimwits who think I want them to announce their departure.
What do they think is going to happen? I'll hold my breath until they come back? IDGAF. If it's not for you, please don't read it. It's not FOR you.
If you are digging the story and I take a detour, well that's sort of my style. I will gladly spend three chapters writing about a single night at Rocky Horror Picture show and relish every word of it.
I am in no hurry to end my journey with the characters. The experience may not "move the plot" from Act I to Act II. It's still allowing others to live viscerally in the setting through the narrator's eyes.
Helping the reader smell the air, the fragrances of flowers, or the salt of the sea, to imagine the sun shining down on their faces just as it is the characters, and letting them hear the sounds in their head through descriptive word is just as important as plot development. I want you to experience this world, identify with it, feel like you know it - even if it's not YOUR personal world you live in now.
I may take you back to where you were in 1987, or a future that would be cool to imagine. In order to do that, I may envision a scenario within the story that simply enhances, without necessarily accelerating the plot. I make no apologies for the occasional detour in the story.
However, if you genuinely have some thoughts of constructive feedback and ideas about story direction, or just want to share continuity concerns, or grammar mistakes you discovered - I would love to hear them. I may not use them, but it's a gift and food for thought that may send me down a different path that was inspired by your feedback combined with my own depraved imagination.
I often write the entire story, or at least several chapters ahead, so it's not always possible for me to accommodate those kinds of requests any longer. Such is the case with NIS: Breeder.
The latest story arc posted around chapter 57, the daughter (Julie) wants to experience what it's like to be a sex worker in an authentic setting. She was challenged by her mentor at school to do things that make her feel "ick" but aren't true physical limits.
She also wants to help her friend and she thinks she can encourage her to go to college through her example of self-sacrifice. I don't think I am giving away much of the plot there, because you don't know how that goes (unless you are reading this a long time from now, after I conclude the story).
I had someone comment tonight (Which was really the final straw) that it made no sense, and "There was no plot".
Bitch, there are 60 chapters of this woman going from shy housewife to brazen naked submissive to her daughter. That's your plot. Where do you want me to shove it, so you can find it?
I am sure he downvoted me, and went off to contribute jack shit to the website except for his toxic negativity. No changing people like that.
In closing, believe it or not, I found a second site that hosts stories. I won't post the URL because that's a naughty thing to do here. However, I've never seen any toxic comments there.
It's all people posting encouraging things like "This is great, can't wait for the next chapter" and "I enjoyed the story, here are a couple notes!"
Imagine if all the toxic trolls on this site would just drop off the planet? nothing of value would be lost and we could just enjoy perverted stories and encourage new authors to write.
Instead, they seem to be waiting to pounce on new authors who write a theme they don't like to discourage them. Tools designed to empower creativity, are often mis-used like public comments, voting, forums and the private mail.
They find ways to get under the skin, undermine, kink-shame, and it works, so why would they ever stop?
Their time clearly has no value, since this is their aspiration. As time vampires, their goal is to suck away anyone else's time - as they did mine reading their gibberish.
You can choose not to engage in almost all of those too except voting. Sadly, it's on by default at chapter one. That's way too early. It's before anyone has an idea of how a much longer story will develop. That's like voting before you watched the dancer take her titties out.
Open to page one, read the first page and cast your vote on whether this is "not a story". Well duh, it's the first page of hundreds of pages to come.
I tend not to judge until at least chapter seven, as long as the story codes interested me.
You can try your hardest to engage with only people who are not toxic, but sooner or later on the forums or public comments, along comes debbie downer the boner killer to post some toxic comment because their life is so miserable that they aren't happy until they've made others miserable.
Just imagine if the majority of us either kept our mouths shut and moved on from stories we didn't enjoy, or offered encouragement?
It would kick ass.
Many apologies for the delays in publishing new chapters of NIS: Breeder Story.
The story is complete, but editing is what takes so much time. Today's chapter is almost twice as long as most, measuring in at around 12,000 words.
To give you some context, that's about 70kb of space on average, and last I checked there were more than 38,000 entire stories on SOL that were 70kb or less.
It took some time to write the chapter, and polish some of the AI art. I am getting much better at it, and I add my own flourishes manually as well as create the captions.
My goal there is to simply enhance the story by giving a few visuals without making the pictures THE story.
This arc in the series takes Julie and her mother out of the high school and into a trailer park. That's a familiar playground for me to write in. I grew up in one, and all sorts of debauched and naughty things happened to me in them while I did.
Arguably, a story about a high school program should be focused on the high school setting and this one certainly does. However, I have always enjoyed the home life stories about the participants.
I like the dirty little brother who laughs and points, or the concerned neighbor who stares awkwardly scenarios. I like the odd circumstances when people visit and find that the participants are home nudists as well.
The "Exchange" nights provided an opportunity for the participants in the Breeder program to visit each other's houses and observe how they live, even participant in how things work at their house.
That speaks to Julie, and I am hoping the twists in chapter 58 will make the wait worth it.
This is a pivotal chapter in the story that alters a lot of dynamics. Piggy is starting to show and soon she'll be full blown pregnant with engorged tits full of milk. That will be another corner in the story.
However, this one is going to change some of the way they approach NIS all together. If it were a TV show, I'd have saved this chapter for a "Season finale", even though it is not the closure of the story. It ends with some interesting questions about what will happen next.
In other news, I am writing the New Foal: A pony girl story.
https://storiesonline.net/n/36875/the-new-foal-a-pony-girl-story
I had a long time reader say that it was not a mother-daughter story, since so much is about the mother and her feelings. The mother is telling the story and it is definitely the two of them partnered.
Most pony girl stories I read are set in a fantasy world where women can be abducted and then trained into show ponies, or they may agree to be paid by some rich weirdo to give up a year of their life and live on the ranch.
I wanted a different kind of story. I wanted a story about a couple who happen to be into BDSM and specifically into pony play. I wanted to show the reader that it could be normalized in their household - "this is just what mom and dad do on weekends"
And as their son and daughter grow up, they naturally have questions and interests of their own.
I've tried to do things differently than many of my stories in the past. One thing I did, that I sort of regret was start publishing it before I had an ending.
That puts the pressure on me to keep up the pace of writing and not leave the readers hanging. I will caveat this story with: "I can't publish a chapter until it is ready, and I won't."
So, be prepared for a bit of a wait, or just give me the time to finish it before you start on it.
I started with the intent of teasing a new story. I typically don't post until I have written the entire thing.
However, I made an exception simply because I was so excited about this new story to share it with you.
I chose a LORA (persistent character) for the Mom in this story that I thought would be cool, but I am having some difficulties with making pictures with it.
I decided to make a "casting change" of sorts, so soon you will see a revision to chapter three
https://storiesonline.net/n/36875/the-new-foal-a-pony-girl-story/3
If you see an updated date for today or later, that's the new character/chapter. If not, please enjoy the previous Carmen until then.
I have asked for consideration not to vote until I reach Chapter seven. I do thank the people that gave the story high marks, but if you are planning a down vote - please give me until chapter seven with this story to make an opinion on it.
Honestly, I wish authors could decide when people can vote, because chapter one is never enough to make a decision. There must be a point in the reading where you know it's going to interest you and it's usually not the cover, chapter one, or the foreward.
In any case, I also posted up the next chapter of NIS.
Chapter 55 represents an "arc" in the story. You could almost consider it complete with Piggy's birthday party. It's going to get bumpy on this ride after ths point. There are many twists and turns ahead.
Time for a quick update on what I am working on. I doubt anyone really gives a fuck, but here goes my brain dump;
I am finishing editing NIS: Breeder Program first.
https://storiesonline.net/n/33623/nis-breeder-program
It's up to 53 chapters, 330,328 words, and has 80,000 downloads. I have a total of 75 chapters and I plan to publish another this evening.
I considered writing a little more, a vignette here and there to stick in as the story progresses. It would be something plot neutral that does nothing to alter the trajectory of character relationships. It simply covers a trip to the store, or a jog, or sex with her husband. It would be written from Piggy's POV, and just add more detail to the world.
I've noticed with some authors they tend to use an economy of words. They try to tell the story in as few words as needed. I am quite the opposite. I get off on writing.
I might spend an entire chapter or two on a meal or a party that could be covered in a few paragraphs. I want the reader to experience the smells, the sounds, the excitement, feel the warmth of the candles and taste the cake. I want the reader to be there with me and the main character on this journey through her eyes and experiences.
A lofty goal, but that's what I am trying to do.
I once said:
Am I the best writer?
NO.
Am I trying to be?
Also, no.
But, I try to do what is within my capacity as a story teller. I try to write as if I am sitting across from someone in a bar shooting the shit and telling them a story. It needs to be engaging and about the most exciting time in their lives and nothing else.
In Piggy's case, this is a transformative story and I could have written 75 MORE chapters about her life.
In some NIS Purist's case, I've been told it is not an NIS story. They have a very narrow definition that involves certain tropes/mary sues and styles of writing that I did not do.
I postulated, what if Nude in school was so normalized, that most people simply accepted it and so now we've moved on to normalizing sexuality and by extension fetishes. I wanted to establish that kink shaming was up there with racism/homophobia in the culture as something that people generally frowned upon.
I wish the world was like that, but it's still not ready to allow people to openly live in a Dominant/Submissive relationship (for example. Too many people think it is abusive/stripping the submissive of something. They don't understand the value of submission to a submissive who simply wants to submit - they get joy out of service and giving.
I wrote a story where they modeled that type of relationship in the Program.
It's finished, complete. However, I will certainly appreciate someone writing fan fiction about the other characters or continuing the story. I will certainly even entertain if someone wants to ghost write a short plot neutral vignette, and inserting it into the story. Send me your idea first though.
That's my main priority.
In addition, I have the New Foal: A Pony Girl Story.
https://storiesonline.net/n/36875/the-new-foal-a-pony-girl-story
Man, this is a fun story to write and illustrate. It's less lofty than the NIS story. It's about a family that engages in BDSM, but the kids really weren't a part of it - they were aware their parents had an interest in pony play. I am on chapter 7, I've posted about four chapters as of this blog.
I normally write the ENTIRE story and then start publishing it, but I wanted to tease it. I was so excited about it.
I also have Visiting Aunt Scarlet.
https://storiesonline.net/s/23522/visiting-aunt-scarlet
This one sat fallow for years. it was originally a few chapters that Mike McGifford wrote and abandoned. I thought it was so brilliant that I asked to put an ending to it. I thought I could do that in a few chapters.
Instead, I let it sit and sit for a few years and finally decided to start illustrating it and publishing it.
It's a back to basics story for me. A woman and her son are visiting her sister. The sister is an escort that works out of her house. I am up to chapter 16. It isn't the most popular story, but like it's red-headed titular character, it is literally my red headed step child story.
I plan to finish this one slowly. It has some interesting twists ahead. It's another that could have 30+ more chapters after the final twist, but I think I will have taken it as far as I can.
I also have Humiliation Games.
https://storiesonline.net/s/31718/humiliation-games
The name is sort of a play on the Hunger Games. I wanted to write about an alternate universe where women are considerered second class, so much so that some of them are food when they served out their usefulness.
In our world, it's silly to think of a dog or cat wearing clothes, and most people who put clothes on a dog or cat seem a little strange to us.
In that world, the same is true for women. I wrote a little into the story though the tale to establish where their history and ours diverged and how it was largely a backlash from the age of Kim Kardashian and the bimbofication of women into superstars that led to some sort of pendulum swing hard to the other direction.
It's also implied on some level that the gruel they eat keeps them stupid and compliant.
This is a fairly short story that I never intended to write a lot on, and it's mostly complete. it just needs editing.
Which leads me to my next project on the horizon.
I've been horny for Morgan Fairchild since I was old enough to hold my pecker up and not fall over on to my face.
I definitely want to include a character that looks a lot like her in this AI and I've already created a very possible Lora to do that. You can expect someone with her features in this next story.
I've got two ideas, one is a mother who simply cannot be embarrassed. She likes sex, she makes no secret of it. Her husband is confident and knows his wife is insatiable. Her daughters and son are sometimes embarrassed by how open the mother is about her desires/wears fishnets around the house.
In this story, we go back to basics. I just want to do an "embarrassed nude female" story.
The classic genre set in the real world, where there is a room full of clothed people and one or two nude females. A lot of streaking/accidental nudity, intentional.
I would probably arrange in that story to incorporate some "new rules" from mom to get her daughters out of their shells and make them stop being such fuddy-duddies and learn to seek pleasure in stead of worrying so much about what people think about them.
The other idea, is to revisit "Itty Bitty Titty Committee"
https://storiesonline.net/s/28240/itty-bitty-titty-committee
For that story, I channelled the late 1970s-1980s when flat-chested girls might be seen wearing a t-shirt or tube-top that said "itty bitty titty committee",
It was a time when, I remember visiting a very old relative, and she might have a cup shaped like a penis in the cupboard, or a statuette of a man with a trench coat on the table. if you press the button, the coat opens and his penis pops out. People used to give each other stuff like that as a gag gift. It was so normal to me at the time, that I miss it.
I started the story in classic ENF fashion:
Daughter is growing/budding and yet the mom doesn't see it. She tries to make her wear a matching one piece that her little sister is wearing.
However, her tits pop out and pubes show on the side in the front.
The mom acts like it's no big deal, but insists she start shaving.
The family goes on vacation, and catches her sunbathing nude. As a punishment "You might have been seen!"
"But I wasn't, mom!"
"well, since you want to be naked so bad and don't care what the neighbors think if they DID see you, you'll place both hands on the fence and stand out in the yard for an hour. Maybe then you will think twice about flashing your little boobies"
"MAWWWMMM!"
"Okay, TWO hours!"
I wanted to do the classic scenes where the mom insists on rubbing her down with suntan lotion ALL over on the beach, and some boys are perving and giggling because it looks like mom is feeling her up, and she blushes.
However, I kind of went overboard on that story and introduced some aspects that put the story over the top. I won't spoil it for you, and it's a fun read as well it's sequel but I think I could go back to that formal of classic ENF and write something about a flat-chested girl and her big titty cousin that summer doing dares up in the tree house.
So, that's where my head is/priorities are. If you have thoughts, or ideas, I am all ears. I love collaborative and creative feedback.
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