Head of the Clan ~ The adventures of Steve and Lana by Von_in_your_Mind


Description: Come along on the journey of Steve and Lana as they begin a new life of love and understanding on the farm in Arkansas. Steve is just your typical computer geek in love with a Arkansas farm girl when the need for a new head of the clan arises.
Size: 685 KB ( ~ 129,896 words)
Type: Humor
Sex Contents: Some Sex
Tags: Ma/Fa, Consensual, BiSexual, True Story

Review by sjowg   [other reviews by sjowg]

Reviewed: 2016-09-19


In the beginning of this story the author gives credit to RealLifeDragon's Cammie Sue series, and then proceeds to tell another story about clan life in Arkansas. The similarities are the good news, and the bad news.

Overall it's a good story. The plot holds together well, with no obvious issues. I didn't find myself having to suspend my sense of disbelief much, but that may just be my total ignorance of life in that part of the country.

The story does seem to drag a bit in the last few chapters, and then come to a rather abrupt end, with some loose ends left unresolved, and a lot of details left out (but at least it does end, unlike Cammie Sue, which just stops). It looks like there's an opening there for a sequel, but given the age of the story I'd guess that there's none coming.

Technically there are a lot of problems: there are issues with spelling, and lots of trouble with punctuation. It's not nearly as bad as the referenced Cammie Sue series; that has much bigger problems. Still, these issues make the reading a much tougher slog than it might be otherwise. There are also issues with idiom and vernacular: in the early chapters the character's accents and manner of speaking are much more pronounced southern/country than they are later in the book.

This book is one where I feel a strong edit would do wonders for it. Obviously, a lot of readers are able to look past these problems, or it wouldn't have the scores that it does. If you like the Cammie Sue series, you'll probably like this book.

For me, the problems are simply too much.

Plot: 7 | Technical Quality: 6 | Appeal to Reviewer: 6

Review by fuzzywuzzy   [other reviews by fuzzywuzzy]

Reviewed: 2009-02-03


What happens when a Nerd falls in love with a triplet who has designs on his future? Lana drops the word to a Tech Spy, and Steve's Dot.Com company is sold out from underneath him. Poor multi, multi millionaire. Well anyway they move back to Lana's family farm, where he is told, in no uncertain words, that he is the new Clan Leader. A clan, in these parts, being a Family Unit, with multiple marriages. The secret to the bonding with the new wives, the two other Triplets, and their younger sister, is to make the women beg to be Bitches, accomplished by having him taking their virgin asses; in other words, a butt fuck. However not all is rosy in the Clan, because of the feud between families, the Smiths, and the Joneses. The Joneses being the "Black Hats." Murder, Mayhem, and Moonshiners abound, and crooked Judges and even more crooked District Attorneys are present, but as Shakesapeare said "All's well that ends well!"
Enjoy.

Plot: 10 | Technical Quality: 10 | Appeal to Reviewer: 10