"Vacation" is the first story in the "Florida Friends" series, and as a native of the Sunshine State, I really wanted to like this series. Unfortunately, this story, and indeed the whole series, suffers from an acute case of what I call "Superman Syndrome."
What is that, you ask? Superman Syndrome afflicts the main character of this story, Steve Sharp. Steve can literally do nothing wrong. Everything he touches turns to gold; he has a 10" dick and can satisfy a dozen or more women per night, each of them having orgasms, every single time they make love with him. His business decisions are also right on, every time, and he makes money simply by opening his mouth. He stumbles into amazing, incredible deals, everyone likes him, he always shoots the bad guy before they shoot him, and everything works out perfectly.
For example: in this story, early on, Steve has an encounter with some bad guys who've come to the trailer park late at night. Very fortunately, Steve's acquired some weapons just that day; also very fortunately, he's found out that his neighbor Shawna is a crack shot. Between the two of them, they're able to take out six bad guys without a scratch on themselves. (The police also conveniently ignore that one of Steve's weapons was illegally obtained; again, things always work out for Steve in that way.)
Even the little stuff comes easily to him. He gets in and out of the DMV in 20 minutes -- ever heard of that happening before? When his trailer is damaged in the above-mentioned firefight, the insurance adjustor comes out, spends about 15 minutes looking at the damage, and issues Steve a check *before he leaves*!! Hell, even the cable TV installer shows up on time and without missing several appointments!
Steve has a charmed life, and some readers might like this type of "fantasy story," where everything goes right. I mean, it's the reason a lot of little kids like fairy tales. But, even in fairy tales, there's got to be a little bit of conflict. I mean, we all know that Snow White is going to be rescued by her prince; but there's a little bit of doubt in the first-time watcher's mind, just a little -- maybe the evil queen is going to win!
In "Vacation," and the rest of the "Florida Friends" series, there's no doubt. Everything Steve touches turns to gold. Every business venture is a winner, every woman falls in love with him (and if they have a partner, every partner is cool with Steve fucking their woman), and every person that crosses Steve in any way gets what's coming to them.
Again, maybe some people like this kind of story; absent of any realistic conflict and/or failure for the main characters. To me, conflict is what makes a story interesting, and how they deal with failure is what makes a person or character interesting.
From a technical standpoint, the story is well written. The characters are consistent, and there aren't many continuity or grammatical or spelling errors.
If you like unrealistic stories about a guy who can do no wrong, and his friends and neighbors (most of whom can also do no wrong, and never fail), this story and its series will appeal to you. But I find it just too unrealistic to be enjoyable.
Reviewed: 2014-02-22 - (Review Updated: 2014-02-23)
It's very difficult to review one of Dual Writer's stories, usually Fuzzywuzzy's got there first. I'm glad he didn't manage it with this one though, because this is the first story in the Florida Friends series.
The whole series will keep you entertained for hours, and hours! If you're working, take a holiday, sorry, vacation. If you're retired, you've got it made! Either way, you're in for a treat, Dual Writer tells a good story, with enough conflict to keep you on the edge of your seat, a good plot, and great characters.
Okay, there are a few typos, but I've seen lots worse on SoL's pages, and there's nothing that makes the stories unreadable. Some of the usual homophones, but not enough to be too irritating, and it gets better as the series progresses. Go on! Live the good life in Florida!
Read, and enjoy the whole series!
(PS: Don't let the ten inch dick, and humongous boobs spoil it, the story works better without them!)