Chapter 11: Warm-up

The club was not quite packed yet so early in the evening, but then again, they were the warm-up gig. Kylie enjoyed very little name recognition in the Rock scene, and the opening act was the best Chas could organize. The billing read, The Clearwater Posse feat. Kylie McAdam, and they let Janet do the talking.

"Good evening, Toby's! We're the Clearwater Posse and we're doing Rock'n Roll! Tonight is our first gig outside of Montana, so we thought we'd bring in some help. Rafael Santana is filling in for our friend Peter who could not get away from work. Rafe is a serious professional and much too good for us country hacks. We also brought in our old high school buddy, Kylie McAdam. You may know her usual stuff, but don't be fooled – she's a rocker at heart! Joining her at vocals is our own Leslie Cramer. Luke at bass and Cliff at lead guitar make it a band. I'm Janet, and I'm at the drums. So, without further ado, we'll give you Suit and Tie!"

They managed their six planned pieces without mishap, and by the end they had the crowd with them. You're Not It went over well, and Cliff even got cat catcalls after his solo. When they stopped after that, the crowd wanted an encore. They had talked about it before, and so Kylie stayed on the stage with Rafael. They both picked up their acoustic guitars and Kylie started into The Sky Below Us to Rafael's gentle accompaniment. This was almost vintage Kylie McAdam, but to her surprise it went over well.

When they were done and packing up, the guys from the main gig, R.I.P., showed on the stage to set up. The vibes they got were not good Kylie could tell, and she almost smiled with happiness. The main act was pissed because the Posse had proven to be a hard act to follow.

Once their equipment was safely tucked away, they all sat at a table to the left of the stage to wind down. Kylie stuck to tomato juice, and to her surprise the Posse avoided even beer.

"Listen you guys, don't do this for me. I have no problems with you drinking a beer or two."

Janet shook her head. "It's not just you, Kyles. Leslie's too young. We're fine. I got enough of a buzz from our gig."

By now, R.I.P. were ready. Right from the start Kylie knew that those guys were nowhere near the Posse. Their lead guitar sucked big ones, their drummer was at best limited, and their lead singer was a joke. They worked through their set bravely enough, and they even gave an encore although Kylie did not hear anyone asking for it. The applause they got after they finished was subdued, and Kylie could see why. She shrugged inwardly. Not her problem. It was past one-thirty anyway, and they decided to call it a night.

They all stayed at Kylie's apartment except for Rafael whom they dropped off at his place. He seemed reluctant to leave the Posse, but there was no valid reason for him to stay. At the apartment they had a midnight snack before they went to bed. Cliff and Luke shared the guest room, while Kylie, Janet, and Leslie squeezed into Kylie's kingsize bed.

Kylie woke up a little after eight o' clock. Janet and Leslie were still fast asleep and so Kylie sneaked out of bed and into the kitchen to start the coffee maker. She squealed a little in surprise when she saw Cliff at the kitchen table sipping from a cup. He gave her a friendly smile and pointed at the coffee jug.

"Hope you don't mind," he said.

"Of course not. Good morning! Did you sleep well?"

Cliff made a face. "Luke had those tacos yesterday."

Kylie giggled. "Your fault. I offered you my bed."

"One day I may take you up on that offer, but right now it would complicate things. Besides, where would you have put up Leslie and Janet?"

"I know," Kylie sighed, sitting down with a cup of coffee. She sipped and inhaled the aroma. "Listen, perhaps you could scout out USC campus in the next days to see whether you would like it? The apartment, too. My offer stands, even if you decide to camp out in the guest room."

"It's a great place, Kyles. And yes, I have a list of things I want to see while I'm here, and USC it at the top of that list."

Kylie smiled happily. "I'm so glad you guys could arrange to help me out. I know it's only two weeks, but with luck we can cut enough songs to compile a small album. It felt good yesterday. Those R.I.P. hacks sure looked pissed off."

"They had impressive ink," Cliff grinned.

"We may have another gig next Saturday, at the Rodeo. It's not a hardrock place, but I know the owner from my early days here. We have to tone things down a bit, but not much."

"You really enjoy performing, don't you?"

Kylie nodded earnestly. "For the most part, yes. Like yesterday, absolutely! How about you?"

"I still feel self-conscious up there on a stage. But yeah, yesterday was fun."

"You did great. I don't want to get ahead too much, but if you decide to go to USC you can always make extra money playing my gigs. I really like your style. Plus, it would be something we can do together. Am I dreaming?"

"It's something to think about. I'm beginning to see how you need this, the gigs, the writing, the rehearsals. I cannot see you being happy without all that. Give me some more time to get my head around this."

Kylie frowned. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, if we really want to give us a try again, a serious one, we can't just go back to our old plans. Those didn't figure Kylie McAdam, the singer. Give me time to absorb this. It's clear that I need to make compromises with my plans for this to happen."

"I told you, they have a DA's office here," Kylie suggested.

"I'm sure they do. But let's just say I want to play a gigs with you on a weekend, and I get stuck with pulling weekend duty. Don't forget I'll be the low man on the totem pole at first."

"So you're saying?"

"I'm saying I need to explore the options. Sure, I'm interested in Criminal Law, but I hardly ever looked into alternatives. Entertainment Law comes to mind. There's even litigation involved in that."

Kylie's eyes grew big. "That would be so awesome!"

"Yeah, well, I need to get into Law School first and finish it. I'm just saying that making a commitment with you will bring a lot of changes to my plans."

Kylie got up, walked around the kitchen table and plopped down on Cliff's lap. "I can promise you lots of upsides, too. Just hearing that you will consider all this makes me sure that we will make it together."

Through her thin pajama bottom she could feel his reaction and she closed her eyes basking in the rush of love that washed over her. Small tremors ran through her body, and when she opened her eyes Cliff looked at her in wonder.

"If I had any doubt about your commitment, they've just been put to rest."

Kylie blushed and grinned sheepishly. "Yeah, it was a small one, but the best in years. You need some help?"

From the feel of it, Cliff needed relief. With a relieved giggle she jumped up and pulled Cliff off the chair and towards the bathroom. Once inside, she locked the door and stripped off her pajama. Then she sank on her knees and pulled down Cliff's boxers. His erection jumped up as soon as she worked the waist band over it, and with a happy giggle Kylie engulfed the purple head with her lips.

A second later, ugly memories washed over her. Don Brentano had demanded blowjobs from her on an almost daily basis, both before and after vaginal sex. It had been meant to establish dominance, with him basically fucking her mouth. Once when she had been particularly messed up, he had penetrated her anus and then tried ass-to-mouth on her. She had puked all over his silk bedcovers, and he was so exasperated that he lost his erection for the evening. Kylie remembered this now as she licked and sucked on Cliff's dick, and the warm feeling was gone. He must have noticed because he stayed her.

"'Sup, Kyles?"

She looked up at him and tears began to form.

"I'm sorry, Cliff. I can't do it."

She felt his hands under her arms and then he held her close.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"I just had a flashback. Don made me give him blowjobs, and I didn't like it," she mumbled into his bare chest. She felt his muscles tense when he heard the hated name. "He did disgusting things to me, and I let him; like anal and fisting. Oh, Cliff! I can't do this to you. I thought I could be your Kylie again, but I'm just a slut, a whore."

She was crying in earnest now and collapsing against him. Cliff felt helpless. If he was honest the blunt revelation was hurting his own ego more than he would have thought. His Kylie had been a submissive cum rag for that Brentano asshole. How could he ever get over the image of Kylie on her knees with Brentano's dick in her ass? Probably moaning and wiggling too?

Nevertheless, he held her close as she cried herself dry. It was awkward. They were both naked, and yet nothing was further from his mind in this moment than sex. He felt an overwhelming sadness, even pity for the wretched young woman in his arms. How could they ever live this down?

Then, with sudden clarity, he saw where Kylie would be heading if he allowed his injured pride and his jealousy to rule his behavior. If he left her, if he gave up on her, she would go back to boozing. All the happiness she had exuded in the last weeks and months would be drowned in Vodka. Then, one day, word would come back to Clearwater that she had overdosed or driven over a cliff, much like Corning's wife. He swallowed hard with that image before his eyes.

Another image came to his help: Kylie, almost naked from the waist up, shivering in the cold and yet fighting for his life with all she had. He almost smiled. There was no question as to which side the scales tipped.

With sudden resolve he steered Kylie over to the bathtub and made her sit on the rim holding her with his left arm. With his right hand he plugged the drain and started the water. While the water was running, he found some scented bath salt and poured a handful into the hot water.

Kylie watched the proceedings morosely, staying mute while single sobs made her jerk in his arm. When the water was high enough, he lifted her up and gently laid her into the water. Then, before she could say anything he joined her and sat behind her. With his right hand, he began to splash water over her body, rubbing her skin and softly stroking her body.

"What are you doing?" she asked sadly.

"Cleaning you," he answered firmly. "I'm washing off whatever Brentano left on you. I'm also washing off whatever Dumont did to you."

"It's burned deep into my skin," Kylie whispered.

"That just means we have to soak longer," he answered unperturbed. "Kylie, we will never know how he got you to do that stuff, or to let him do the stuff to you. I'd say he put you under some drugs, but we'll never know unless I can beat it out of him. But then again, I'd go to prison and have the same stuff done to me by some guy named Bubba."

She smiled weakly. "Don't ever do anything stupid, Cliff! I'm not worth it, you hear!"

As if he hadn't heard her, he continued. "The only thing I can do, we can do, is to leave that past behind. Whenever you think of him, put away the images of what he made you do. Instead, focus on the stuff that was ridiculous. You said he posed all the time and that he used blue pills to stay hard. Think of that. Think of his wrinkles, of his flabby body, of his hair pieces."

Cliff was rewarded with a suppressed giggle from Kylie.

"Jeez, you want me to puke all over you?" She shook her head. "Cliff, how can you stand me? Don't you picture me sometimes with ... Don or Hugh?"

Cliff sighed. "I used to. That's why I skipped the stupid reunion. These days I try to picture you as the one person with enough presence of mind to staunch my bleeding and keep me breathing. I also picture you on the stage, singing your heart out and being so damn beautiful. I try to focus on those happy images."

"Can you really do that?"

"I have to. The alternative is too frightening. It would mean losing you again. I also ... When I first met Chas, he told me about his wife."

"Sylvie?"

"Yeah. He warned me, told me about his feelings of guilt."

Kylie made a face. "You're afraid I may slip back into booze and go off the deep end?"

"That and even worse images."

"Chas never told me about his wife. I had to piece it together from things I heard. Cliff, I don't want you to feel obligated. Losing you would break my heart, but this time I'd have my parents, and I'd have Janet. I'm also stronger now."

"Yeah, that may be. But who'll be there for me when I lose you?"

"That's how you feel?"

He just nodded. She stared at him for what seemed like an eternity.

"Okay," she finally said flatly. "Prove it! Show me you can handle my past!"

"How?"

"Fuck me! Can you do that? Can you throw me over that stool and fuck the shit out of me? Can you do that knowing that I gave myself to Don or Hugh in the same way? Can you fuck me and push your thumb up my butt?"

In spite of himself, Cliff felt his treacherous dick respond to the verbal challenge. He tried to talk himself out of it, nonetheless.

"I thought I was your apple pie."

"Yeah, but I may want it with whipped cream now and then. I need to know if you can handle that. Doing things that I learned from other men. I'm not the same Kylie anymore. I'm older, I'm a bit damaged, and once in while I want my man to just take me. No sweet talk, no nibbling, no gentleness. Just rough talk, biting, and fucking. Show me that you lay claim to me."

Looking down at his groin, he could not help but grin wryly. "A crucial part of me agrees."

"Cut the wiseass talk! Can. You. Fuck. Me?"

The brazen challenge tripped a switch in Cliff. He grabbed her face and turned it up. Looking down into her eyes, he answered in a low growl.

"You want to be fucked? You want me to force your ass open? You want to feel claimed?" She did not say a word, but the challenge was in her eyes. He let go of her face and thrust his right hand between her legs. With only bathwater for lubrication, he pushed his middle finger into her opening and she gasped. "That's what you want? My finger in your ... cunt?"

The rough talk did not come easy to him. It was against the way he had been raised. His mother would have a coronary if she ever heard him use the word "cunt". Kylie hips rose to meet his hand to force his finger deeper. She felt hot inside, and Cliff could feel her slippery juices around his finger in spite of the bathwater. He added his index finger and pushed back in. Kylie's eyes flew open and she shivered.

"Do it!" she panted.

With two fingers, he started to pump her opening with regular, forceful strokes, and she whimpered trying desperately to meet his strokes with her pelvis.

"Is that your pussy?" he asked, spearing her deeply.

"Yesss!" she hissed and moaned when he pulled his fingers out.

"Wrong." He pushed them back in. "Is that your pussy?"

She got it. "No, it's yours!"

"Damn right! Now get up on your knees."

Obediently, she lifted herself up and knelt in the tub, the water running down from her tanned body, her wet hair dangling.

"I ... I want you to make my dick hard. No! No hands. Use your tongue."

She did. She licked along the shaft, she licked the tip, and the licked the root and the scrotum. At one point, when she licked the root of his dick from below, the length of it rested on her face while she looked unwaveringly up into his eyes.

"S-suck it! Suck my dick!" he demanded, getting into the spirit of things. She did. Still gazing up at him, she sucked the tip into her mouth.

"You want me to fuck you? You want me to ram your pussy?"

She nodded, never loosing eye contact and never letting his dick slip out. Her tongue began to swirl against the sensitive underside of his glans, and he almost lost it. It took concentration to stay in character. He forced himself to grab her wet hair and pulled her head away. She still looked up, panting slightly.