Epilogue

Jennifer leaned back, relaxing, and ran her hands over her swollen belly. She did this as often as possible, both because she was sure the baby could feel it, and perceive it as love, and because they had decided this one should probably be their last. She would be forty in two weeks, which was one week, to the day, after her due date. Josh had, as he loved to tell people, "knocked the old broad up" two times previously, and, if they stopped with three, then they wouldn't have to move into a bigger house.

True, it would be "cozy" for them, in the three bedroom ranch they'd moved into after the divorce was final. But the boys already lived together, and that left one bedroom for the daughter who caused the bulge she was currently running her hands over. She was sure, in her own mind, that one reason Tiffany had gone so wrong was because she was an only child, and that if she'd have had to muscle past a sibling or two to get possession of the bathroom once in a while, her social skills might have been better developed. Not to mention actually having two, caring, present parents.

She realized she was tense. She got that way every time she thought of Tiffany. Tiffany, who had believed that, if you got drunk enough, it would abort a pregnancy. She'd been right, in one sense. While Tiffany had survived the alcohol poisoning, the baby had not. The only bright spot in that whole episode was that Todd, who told her about the sure-fire-get-rid-of-the-baby plan, had also supplied the alcohol, and got prison time for doing so. During the divorce, Tiffany had claimed her mother tried to pimp her out to "her dancer friends." When investigators could find no shred of evidence to support her claim, she had simply said "She ruined my life. I wouldn't live with that bitch if she was the last woman on earth."

She'd ended up in foster care because of it. She had run away three times. The last time she'd been found with heroin tracks on her arms, and wasn't even aware she had been pimped out for real. She had turned eighteen in the middle of rehab and when the state kicked her to the curb and stopped paying, the rehab center kicked her to the curb too. Jennifer had no idea where her daughter was now. There had been no word for more than two years.

Visualizing an imaginary finger, she located each tight muscle with her mind and intentionally relaxed it. It was something Josh had taught her how to do. She hadn't had to take an aspirin in years. It took five minutes, but finally she was relaxed again.

Bradley, her five year old, came into the room. He saw his mother rubbing her belly.

"Can I read her a story?" he piped.

"Of course. You know she loves it when you read to her."

"How do you know?"

"She moves around. I think she's trying to clap her hands," said Jennifer.

He got a book from the coffee table. There were books strewn everywhere. She and Josh picked them up and put them away two or three times a day, but Brad and his little brother, David pulled them all out again. The boys loved books.

He brought the book to the couch, where Jennifer was leaning back. As if he had every right to do so, the little boy pulled his mother's T shirt up, bunching it just below her breasts, and baring the tightly stretched skin of her belly.

An elbow, or maybe a heel, made a protruding bump that slid from her side to the middle of her stomach, right where her navel was.

"See there?" she said. "She knows you're about to read, and she's all excited."

"Goody!" he said. "Hi, Jasmine," he said, reaching out to touch the bump, which promptly disappeared from under his hand.

He was just finishing the book when Josh came in. David was in his arms, having been removed from the BOB jogging stroller he loved to ride in as his daddy pushed him along at breakneck speeds. When Josh bent down and the boy's feet hit the floor, he immediately ran to rub his mother's belly while his brother finished the book.

"Ja'min," he cooed.

"How is jammin Jasmine?" asked Josh, leaning down to give Jennifer a kiss.

"Impatient," said Jennifer. "Like her mother."

Josh smacked his lips. "I'm impatient too. Yummmmmm."

Jennifer smiled. He was referring to the fact that, with Brad, she'd gotten to fulfill one of her dreams, to nurse her baby. When Josh saw how eager his son was to latch onto a fat nipple, and wanted to know what the big fuss was about, she said he was insane, but let him sample her milk.

They were astonished at the pleasure involved ... for both of them. The months long delight had been repeated with David, and Josh was obviously looking forward to having a lactating wife again.

"When we put the boys to bed, perhaps you can toughen up my nipples," she said, her voice coy. She was alluding to their first Lamaze classes, when one of the nurses who was teaching the class said, with a completely straight face : "It might be necessary for you fathers to bite the bullet and toughen up mom's nipples by sucking on them gently for ten or fifteen minutes, four or five times a day." After the laughter had died down, she said "And I know it's a lot to ask, but please remember... both nipples need to be toughened up."

Jennifer smiled as she remembered that session. There had been a disturbance at that point. A woman had yelled "Stop that!" The members of the class had looked to see one young woman's face bright red, her hand slapping at the man with her. It turned out her coach was her brother, rather than the actual father of the child. He, of course, was grinning from ear to ear. Jennifer remembered thinking of the line in Hamlet: "The lady doth protest too much, methinks," at the way the girl was reacting.

Josh sighed. "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, I guess." He struck a pose. "I will be brave! I will sacrifice for the sake of my unborn daughter! Perhaps I should see the targets even now, so I will know what to look for when the time comes."

"Not in front of your sons," said Jennifer, who scooped David up onto the couch so she could give him a kiss. "They have their father's genes, which means in ten or fifteen years virgins will have to be locked up all over the country, for their own protection."