Chapter 17: Roomies

Claire Ingram sighed when she entered the lecture hall. She was late and the room was packed already. Professor Babcock was still busy hooking up his laptop to the projector. Claire let her gaze sweep the room. There! An empty seat, in the second to last row.

She made her way over and asked perfunctorily. "Hey, may I have this one?"

The girl who sat on the next seat jerked before she nodded without looking. Claire did not know her; she was sitting hunched over as if to avoid contact. Babcock was still fiddling with the cables and Claire gave it another try.

"Hi, I'm Claire."

The girl lifted her head and Claire looked into a pair of surprisingly blue eyes under brunette, curly hair. A Celtic girl and a pretty one.

"I'm Deirdre," the girl spoke, no, whispered.

"So, what's up for today?" Claire kept asking.

"Non-parametric tests," Deirdre answered.

"Hrhm!" Babcock started to quell the murmur in the seats. "We will deal today with non-parametric tests, such as the U-test, first developed by Mann and Whitney in 1947..."

For the next ten minutes, Babcock showed tables with p values and formulas. Claire zoned out as usual in statistics but she had a rude awakening.

"Ms. Ingram, please, where would one apply the U-test?"

Desperately, Claire tried to remember anything from Babcock's droning presentation.

"Umh, for testing the significance of different data pairs?"

"Yes, but why not use the t-test?"

How the hell was she to know that? A helpless shrug was all she could muster.

"Ahem, an insightful shrug, to be sure," Babcock sneered to the titter of the spitlickers in the first rows. "Who's that next to you?"

Claire nudged Deirdre who looked up.

"Darling, Sir, Deirdre Darling," she almost whispered.

"Yes, Ms. Darling ... What sort of name is 'Darling'? Your parents should have named you Clementine, not Deirdre," Babcock sneered.

"Fourth grade, Alwyn Thomas," Deirdre said softly.

"Beg your pardon?"

"In fourth grade an obnoxious boy named Alwyn Thomas was the first to make that joke, Sir. By my count you are number 56 to come up with that clever pun."

Deirdre's voice was very low but everyone had heard her clearly. Claire had a hard time keeping her face straight. Others did not even try. The giggling even included Babcock's fan block.

"A witty reply, Ms. Darling," Babcock smiled evilly. "Perhaps you will enlighten us with the answer to my question?"

"The difference between U-test and t-test, Sir, or the one about my last name?"

"This is statistics, Miss Darling."

"Oh, okay." Deirdre started, still speaking in a low voice. "The fundamental difference is that the U-test compares ranking, not numerical values. This makes it more robust against outlier data pairs but sensitive against shifts of the median."

"And, pray, why is that so?"

From this point on, Claire, together with the rest of the class, lost track. They were talking about Null hypotheses and distribution curves and the exchange became heated to a point that Deirdre spoke with a clear, carrying voice. To Claire it was like watching two people argue in Latin. Obviously, Deirdre held her own because Babcock returned to his droning lecture and avoided asking any questions for the remainder of the class.

When they packed their stuff Claire shook her head. "Do you know that stuff?"

"Have to," Deirdre answered her shoulders hunched again. "That's something I'll need for certain."

"Are you planning on being a Math major?"

"No, but Science, Biology."

"Say, didn't I see you yesterday? Where are you rooming?"

"Cedar, but only since last week."

"Oh, I'm Cedar, too. Why'd you change?"

"Didn't get along with my last roomy."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm rooming with Marge Foxworth. She's all about partying and I'm losing sleep. Who're you rooming with now?"

"Erin Harper."

"That's Marge's best friend. I feel for you."

"Amen. It's difficult to get any work done with her prattling nonsense on the cell."

"You're going back now?"

"Yeah."

"Mind if I tag along? I'm a bit lost. My best friend transferred out last week."

"Sure."

And so Claire walked with Deirdre. She was even able to extract some personal information from the girl but boy, was she ever shy! She was recently from Philadelphia but she had grown up in Pittsburgh. Her mother was a lawyer, an assistant district attorney. Claire also told about her background, her parents, their home in Ventura, but she left out Cheryl. She was not ready to talk about Cheryl.

Their rooms were only four doors apart and both doors were open with music blaring from each of them. Marge was sitting on her bunk, her one naked leg dangling down while she applied nail polish to the toe nails of the second.

"There's a party in Maple tonight. You coming?" Marge asked.

"Who's inviting?" Claire asked back. She was very careful with parties, all part of the baggage she was carrying.

"The MacAdam brothers. Gawd, they're dreamy, aren't they?"

"Not the brightest bulbs on the Christmas tree," Claire answered.

"Yeah, well, it's a kegger not a spelling bee," Marge giggled.

"I think I'll pass. Just keep it down when you come back, will you?"

"Yeah, yeah. I may not be back tonight anyway if you know what I mean."

That was nothing new for Claire. Marge often stayed away on weekend nights and the way she smelled when she returned made it clear that her idea of fun included beer, grass, and male ejaculate, and not necessarily in that order of preference. Claire just nodded and sighed.

"You know, you're like boring, Claire," Marge observed, "but you're way better than Erin's new roomy."

"I saw her today. She seems nice," Claire defended Deirdre.

"She's like a total loon! She's afraid of guys, can you imagine? And at night, she'll like start whimpering, even screaming sometimes. Erin says she's gonna complain."

A great big lightbulb went off in Claire's head. "Say, Marge, wouldn't it be cool for you and Erin to be roomies? I mean, I seem to get along with Deirdre but we both don't seem to click with you or Erin. We could swap roomies. Think of the fun you could have with Erin!"

Claire processed that idea for only a second before she smiled.

"Awesome! I mean, like Erin and I, we could ... Well, never mind. Wanna go over and talk it out? Or should we like ask the RA first?"

"Naw, let's talk to Erin and Deirdre first," Claire said.

"I bet the RA is happy to find a roomy for that weird girl. She's been through two of them before Erin. Always the same: screaming in the night and ya know like freezing up when a guy comes near."

Claire felt realization wash over her. Deirdre was traumatized. She had nightmares and was afraid of guys. For Claire this spelled just one explanation: sexual abuse victim. She kept her mouth shut though. If she told Marge of her suspicion the story would be all over the campus before this night was over.

"Let's go over, then."

Entering Erin and Deirdre's room, Claire felt the tension between the girls.

"Hey, Marge," Erin greeted her friend. "Guess what! Miss Goody-two-Shoes tells me I can't have Luke visit next weekend. 'This is a girls only floor.' Like anybody gives a fuck!"

"Well, I do and it's my room, too," came the obstinate reply from Deirdre.

"Jeez, what is it with you? You never got laid?"

"Ahem," Claire interrupted, "Marge and I just had an idea."

"Yeah," Marge continued. "Claire like volunteered to take the kill joy in with her. Meaning, I could move in with you."

"Awesome! Claire, you serious? I mean, you're a stick in the mud but compared with her you're Miss Congeniality."

"I'm serious. Deirdre's into the books as much as I am. Deirdre, what do you say? Wanna room with me?"

Deirdre looked up suspiciously. "Why?"

"I think we may be more compatible."

"Yeah, right," Erin laughed. "Wait until..."

"Shut up!" Marge hissed and Erin opened her eyes wide in realization that she was about to ruin the swap if she trash talked Deirdre.

Claire sat against Deirdre's desk. "Wanna try?"

Looking at Erin, Deirdre sighed. "Okay, I guess. Can't be worse than now."

Claire grinned with relief. "That's the spirit. What say we move you right away? Marge, if we all help we can get this done before supper and you guys can start the good life."

"What about the RA?"

Claire pulled her cell phone and dialed the RA. Denise Everett answered after two rings and it took Claire less than two minutes to get the approval.

"All set," she announced and in rare harmony the four unequal girls set to the task of swapping rooms. Less than an hour later, Deirdre's meager belongings filled a third of the wardrobe in her new room, and Claire helped her to organize the rest. Once finished Claire jumped up on her bunk bed.

"This is great! I was dreading the coming night with Marge going on that party over at Maple. The last time she brought back two guys and they kept yakking until the wee hours."

Deirdre regarded her for a moment. "Look, let's get things out into the open. Marge told you I have nightmares, right?"

"Not directly, but yeah, I got the idea."

"Why then? Are you aiming for a psych major? Do you see me as a study case for a homework?"

"Nope, I wanna be a business major," Claire laughed. "Believe me, even if you have nightmares it won't be as disturbing as Marge running her vibrator empty."

Deirdre blushed but she showed a faint smile. It morphed into a smirk.

"Umh, Claire, if I start thrashing and crying, better stay away. My first roomy, she tried to comfort me, and I somehow broke her nose in my panic."

Claire's eyes widened a little. But then she shrugged for show.