Chapter 15

Three years passed. Harry had finished at Cambridge with a double first and was working with a large electronics company at Telford in Shropshire. That suited him very well as he was only about an hour and a half's drive from Aberystwyth where both Annette and Louise were.

He and Annette were as deeply in love as ever. The physical aspects had developed slowly. Harry was allowed access to her naked breasts and a clothed bottom but she still could not bring herself to allow him to touch her 'down there' as she still referred to it. Nor had she done anything with Louise.

She and Louise were still as close. Both were in the university hockey team as well as playing for Wiltshire and the Western Region. The special link they had on the hockey field was still very much in evidence. Annette seemed to sense where Louise wanted to clear the ball to and Louise seemed to know instinctively from where Annette wanted to launch an attack. The latter meant that they frequently wrong-footed their opponents and scored.

Annette thoroughly enjoyed her Zoology. One of her tutors was a Dr Michael Thorne. She quickly discovered that he was an ardent and very knowledgeable ornithologist. He used to lead teams at the weekends to watch birds in the Welsh mountains and on the cliffs. His wife, Eileen, always came too. It was not long before Annette became a friend as well as a student. Michael was in his early forties. He had played Rugby for Cardiff University and had retained his fitness. Eileen was in her late thirties. She had been a hockey player, not of Annette's standard, but had maintained her fitness from walking in the mountains on their bird trips. Both were cheerful and outgoing. Their only sadness was that they had been unable to have children and they began to look upon Annette as a term-time daughter. As such they welcomed Harry as a weekend guest and he was more than happy to be with his love and also learn about birds that he had never seen.

Louise was not quite in the same happy position. She was not interested in birds and her boyfriend was still down in Wiltshire. Nevertheless, being her mother's daughter, she was never at a loss for friends and she shared digs with Annette. She was happy enough.

That September as Annette approached her nineteenth birthday both girls were invited to Nottingham to take part in the England Women's Hockey trials. Neither was selected for the squad but were warmly commended and told they would be invited back the next year. Annette was relieved. She could not see how they could fit in the national training programme with completing their degrees.

One weekend, when they were not on a bird watching trip and Harry was not present although Annette was staying with the Thornes, Eileen tackled her.

"How long have you and Harry been together?" she asked.

"We've known each other for the best part of five years but only seriously for three."

"Is it cooling?"

"Gosh! No way! If anything I love him more than ever. Why on earth do you ask?"

"It's just that you're both so undemonstrative. Sure I've seen the looks that pass between you and you kiss him hello and goodbye and that sort of thing but there seem precious few other demonstrations of affection."

Annette was silent and looked down.

"Oh, oh," thought Eileen. "I've put my foot in it." She remained silent for a short while and then said softly, "Sorry if I said the wrong thing. I'll shut up again."

Annette shook her head but did not look up.

Eileen watched her for a few moments and then equally softly said, "On the other hand if it would help to talk..."

This time Annette did look up. Her eyes were filled with tears and she was biting her lip to avoid actually crying.

Eileen went to her and held her in her arms. "You don't have to tell me anything. It's not really any of my business but Michael and I have grown very fond of you, of both of you for that matter, so if there's any way you think we can help just let me know. If you just want to have a really good cry, feel free."

That opened the floodgates and Eileen held a sobbing girl for a full ten minutes. Finally Annette was able to pull herself together.

"Sorry, Eileen," she sniffed.

"Nothing to be sorry about. If anybody should be sorry it should be me for bringing it on."

Annette shook her head. "No," she said, "I was being silly again. I'll tell you about it in a minute when I've had a drink of water. It's something that my mother and I have talked endlessly about but she is emotionally involved with the problem herself. You, being detached from it, might be able to help in some way."

Annette collected a glass of water from the kitchen and then the two sat on the sofa. Annette took a deep breath and began.

"My father was a paedophile and abused me when I was eleven. He committed suicide in prison. For a long while I was frightened of men but my new father, Richard, and his two sons helped me overcome that. I still felt though that I was guilty and unclean. My mother, Louise's mother and finally Harry knocked that on the head. At one stage, because I didn't want to lose Harry through him being frustrated, I made him agree not to even hug or kiss me so as to avoid things getting out of hand. That became unbearable and I changed the rules to slow and gentle. He accepted those too and we've really come quite a long way but I still can't bring myself to let him touch me 'down there'. It still frightens me to think of any man doing that. I've thought of letting a woman but that would be much the same as me doing it myself which I can accept and enjoy. I might enjoy her doing it but I'd still be terrified of letting a man. Harry realises this and, although we may have an occasional make out, it is only occasional because he is just as terrified of overstepping the line and frightening me away. As a result we're even less physical than we were three years ago."