Chapter 52

Mark was awoken in the early hours of the morning. It was just staring to get light and Victoria was struggling in his arms and whimpering.

"Darling," he whispered, "what's wrong?"

She continued to struggle and when he tightened his arms round her she fought them. "No! No!" she moaned.

Mark was alarmed. "Victoria," he said sharply and felt her stiffen. "Victoria, darling," he said more softly, "what's the matter, my sweet?"

She turned abruptly in his arms. "Is that really you, Mark?"

"Yes, darling. What's the matter?"

Victoria clung to him, wracked with sobs. "Oh, darling! Oh, darling! You came for me."

Mark held her, mystified. "Yes, my sweet, I'm here. I've never been away."

"Really?"

"Really." He kissed the top of her head. "Have you had a bad dream?"

There was a long pause and then she looked up at him, tears still pouring. "Yes, Mark. A horrid, horrid dream. There were two of you," she sobbed. "One was the real you but you were the other side of something. I could see you but I couldn't get through to you and you did nothing about it, just stood there. And then there was another you right beside me and you were cold and uncaring and rough and you were beastly to me and treated me like dirt as though I'd done something frightful to you. And I couldn't talk to you. I thought but couldn't say. I didn't know what I had done. And the other you hated me. The real you was still there but we were separated. Oh God!" she wailed.

Mark tightened his hold on her and then released her so that he could kiss her which he did with infinite gentleness.

"You're safe, my sweet. That was a perfectly beastly dream but you've never left my arms all night and as far as I'm concerned you have done nothing frightful, nothing at all. I love you, my darling, my precious little pixie, and nothing in this world is going to change that."

"Oh, Mark darling!" She clung to him harder and the sobs wracked her again. "Please, darling, please, never let anything ever come between us."

He held her and stroked her back. "What could come between us? I know that I will love you for ever and ever."

She snuggled up to him and he continued to stroke her back. Occasionally an after sob shook her body but twenty minutes or so later she was at peace again. She raised her head to meet his eyes looking down at her with love and compassion.

"Thank you, Mark darling. I'm sorry I behaved so stupidly."

"No, you didn't. You'd had a perfectly horrible dream about both of us and it was very real to you, my poor sweet. I'm glad you're over it. You must never let it trouble you again. I promise. I'm never going to stop loving you."

They shared a long, gentle kiss: no passion, no lust, just deep, tender love.

After a while Mark could control himself no longer. "I've got to go to the lavatory," he whispered.

"I'll come with you."

Mark performed first and was about to leave when Victoria said, "Please wait for me."

Mark did so. She clung to his hand as they went back to his room and, as soon as they were in bed, snuggled up and clung to him again. Neither could sleep. Victoria was frightened to and Mark was too concerned for her to do so himself.

"Let's go for a walk, darling," he suggested. "Then we can come back and have a monster breakfast."

She nodded against his chest.

"Stay where you are while I get dressed and then I'll come and keep you company while you do."

"Thank you," she whispered.

They did that and Mark's heart bled as he watched her. She looked like a little waif. In the kitchen Mark left a note to say they had gone for a walk and had taken the dogs.

They walked hand in hand down the drive. Nothing was said. The dogs were totally unfazed by Victoria's mood and romped joyfully in the early morning sun. Their happiness could not help but be contagious and Mark felt Victoria's death-grip on his hand relaxing.

"Where do we go when we get to the bottom of the drive?" Mark asked. "Remember, I'm a stranger round these parts."

Victoria gave him a glimmer of a smile. "I'll lead you, darling. How long do you want to walk for?"

"An hour? An hour and a half?"

"Fine."

She relapsed into silence again. He did not break it. She would talk when she was ready and he did not want to push her. Sure enough some thirty minutes later she looked up at him.

"Mark, darling?"

"Yes, my sweet."

"Are we going to have a joint bank account?"

"Golly, I haven't given it a thought. I suppose so. Yes."

"What would you do if I was irresponsible and got us overdrawn?"

"Spank you for starters," he said with a smile and was rewarded with a little one in return.

"What else?"

"Try to work out where you'd gone wrong and talk to you about it."

"Would you be angry with me?"

"No, I don't think so. Disappointed perhaps but not angry. I might be a bit cross with myself for not spotting that things were going wrong earlier though. Anyway, I don't foresee the problem arising. You're much too intelligent to do something like that."

She gave him another grateful little smile and then relapsed into silence again.

"Mark, darling?" She broke the silence again.

"Yes, my love."

"Do you trust me?"

"Completely. Any way in particular?"

"W-with other m-men."

"Completely and utterly. If you did ever go with somebody else it would have been my fault."

"How can you be sure?"

"Because you have loved me for so long and now you love me even more. The only reason you would ever give up on that love would be if I pushed you into it and I can't see myself ever doing that."

"Why not?"

"Because I love you too much for that to ever happen."