Chapter 18: Closure

JUNE 2002, SENIOR YEAR

I only had a slight hangover on Saturday morning. Unfortunately, it was made worse by Eden and Emma hogging the TV and then blasting Avril Lavigne's debut CD. I'd had the line "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?" stuck in my head for weeks while agonizing over my relationship with Adrienne before. To hear it again on repeat was driving me nuts, and I was only too happy to get out of the house for my own Graduation Ceremony.

Adrienne drove us out early so that we could line up. She looked quite cute in her cap and gown; and since she was wearing just a spaghetti-strap tank top and short shorts underneath it, she looked practically naked beneath the shimmering cloth.

We jointly decided not to leave each other's side until we absolutely had to. Graduation was alphabetical after all, and my last name didn't start with a 'D'. So by keeping the simple expedient of holding hands at all times, unless we were hugging someone goodbye or exchanging handshakes, I was never far away from the girl with whom, for the moment at least, I wanted to spend the rest of my life.

We then prepared ourselves to say goodbye to those with whom we'd spent twelve years of our educational lives. Our core group of friends still planned to get together a few times before leaving for college. A date in August, right before the private school people departed, had been circled for months as our last big party. But there was a symbolic ending in this day and for other, more casual acquaintances, this was it.

Kenny was there early, and we bumped fists in greeting before giving in to our emotions and just hugging each other, at least pounding each other's backs to keep it 'manly'. He'd been my best bud since Junior High and even though we hadn't been so tight the last year or so, I'd never forget his friendship. He was staying around town going to UC Irvine, and he said he and Abbie were going to give the distance thing a shot since Claremont was only 45-minutes or so away.

Abbie herself confirmed it a few minutes later when she and Allie arrived. There were hugs all around and for a little while, we chatted about what life at Pomona and Scripps would be like for the two of them.

"Keep Kenny at Pomona if he visits," Allie warned. "Scripps is all-female."

"Just don't turn lezzie on me," Abbie chided her sister.

Allie blushed beet red and Adrienne patted her little friend on the shoulder, a knowing look in her eyes.

Stephanie came by and we talked about Ivy League schools since she was going to Princeton. Beauty and brains ... I wondered again how life would have been different if my first crush and I had actually hooked up way back when.

Lynne came next and got into a spirited rivalry with both Miss Ivy League and with Adrienne and me since she would be across the bay at Stanford. I hoped we would find a way to reconnect in NorCal since she wouldn't be too far away.

Sung arrived, looking only slightly uncomfortable around Stephanie, now that they'd 'officially' broken up. But he bumped fists with Kenny since they were both going to UCI and the two started making plans for taking over the world.

Turned out, Heather was also going to UCI. With her advanced Math skills, she was majoring in ICS (Information and Computer Science), and I knew with her smokin' body she was going to be really popular with the computer geeks. She was quick to move alongside Kenny and Sung to start flirting with some of the guys going to the same school.

Daniel and Elaine were next. They'd first gotten together freshman year and now that the pair of them were going to UCLA, we all imagined they'd be together forever.

"Send us the wedding invites," Kenny grinned. "In what, a few weeks?"

Daniel and Elaine just rolled their eyes and hugged each other tightly.

Next to last were Megan and Kaito, both going to USC. Kaito shook my hand firmly and respectfully. In his mind, he would always give me credit for bringing him and Megan together, something for which he would always be grateful. And Megan, bound together by our past in a way that could never be broken, came up and hugged me fiercely while I trapped her head against the center of my chest.

"Are you happy, Megan?" I asked softly.

She started crying softly, but nodded her head up and down against my chest. She pulled away and looked up at me. "I'll never forget my first everything, Ben."

"Nor I my first girlfriend, Megan, and everything we learned together," I replied warmly.

She pulled my head down to her level and got up on her tiptoes to kiss my cheek softly; then I stood back up as she hugged me again. "It's not goodbye, Ben. It's just 'See you next time'."

"Got it." I patted her back. And then I looked up just in time to see Cassidy come to a stop a few feet away.

Her coppery hair fluttered in the wind, her arms folded tightly across her chest where she trapped the square mortarboard hat against her breasts. Cassidy looked both nervous and sad. And as I let go of Megan and approached her, I realized that my one-time girlfriend was actually hugging herself and struggling to keep from crying.

"Hi, Freckles," I said softly.

"Hi, Ben," she answered a little shakily.

"What's wrong, Freckles?" I asked gently.

Her lower lip quivered and she bit it to keep from shaking. Her bright green eyes were shimmering with moisture as she glanced to the side, seeing both Adrienne and Megan looking at us curiously while the rest of our friends were occupied by chatting amongst themselves, oblivious to this ... thing ... going on between me and Cassidy.

"I'm going to miss you, Ben."

"I'll miss you too, Freckles," I smiled.

But Cassidy shook her head, telling me that I didn't understand. A solitary tear rolled down her cheek and she took a deep breath. "I ... I never thought I would feel this way when it came down to it. But..." Her voice trailed off.

I waited silently while Cassidy squeezed her eyes shut, pushing out a few more tears as she fought for composure. Megan made to move up to her friend, but Adrienne touched the shorter girl's arm to hold her back.

Then Cassidy inhaled and stood up straight, collecting herself. "I guess I never got completely over you, Ben. I thought I was, but somehow, some part of me still believed we might get back together someday."

She glanced over at Adrienne and nervously bit her lip again. I glanced at Adrienne as well, furrowing my eyebrows as my brain raced to understand what was going on.

"There was the whole cheating thing, which I forgave you for," Cassidy said softly, as if afraid our other friends would hear. "Then there was that time that we-" she took a deep breath, interrupting herself. "That we then cheated on Adrienne."

I glanced again to my girlfriend, who just stared at us impassively.

"And then ... nothing," Cassidy shrugged. "You crawled back to me and then I turned you down even though I was still in love with you. Then you went away for the summer and I met Cameron and everything just snowballed. And now here we are, going our separate ways, and there's no more time left for us, Ben."

I took a deep breath and focused inward. My break with Megan at the time, while far more painful and violent, had ultimately been much cleaner. We appreciated what time we had and both moved on with our lives. Even though our break had been protracted and rather messy in the end, I'd thought Cassidy had also moved on as well. But she hadn't, and the unfortunate thing for her was that I wasn't in love with her anymore. I had Adrienne now and couldn't be happier about it.

Cassidy read my hesitation and laughed nervously. "I know this is crazy and is coming out of left field. I mean, we were only together for a few months, and even that time was split with Megan. But it is what it is. I just wish I could feel like all the loose ends were tied up."

I took another deep breath and in a heartbeat, I made up my mind. It was stupid and impulsive, but I did it anyways. I took two steps forward and wrapped Cassidy up in my arms, my hands coming up behind her head as I pulled her face to mine as I planted a firm kiss on her lips. There was a wail of sorrow in her moan, as if she knew she was kissing me for the last time.

I heard a gasp and then conversation behind me came to a stop, as if our friends had noticed what was happening and dropped everything to gawk at me kissing Cassidy. But I pushed them out of my head and poured all of my affection, but none of my love, into the kiss.

When I pulled away, Cassidy's eyes were still closed. She was breathing heavily and tasting her own lips, her pink tongue trailing across the pads gently before eventually blinking her eyes open and showing me the verdant green irises.

"Cassidy," I said firmly, feeling a weight of emotions as I used her given name instead of 'Freckles'. "I'll always cherish what we had together. But I'm sorry, I don't love you anymore."

Her lower lip quivered and Cassidy looked ready to burst into tears again, but she nodded slowly, her head motion building in force and confidence the longer she kept nodding. "Okay, Ben..." she exhaled, and then took a deep breath to collect herself. She reached up and pulled my arms off her, gently bringing them around her body and letting go. "Okay..." And then she smiled. "Thanks Ben, for everything."

"Thanks to you too, Cassidy," I replied, feeling a note of finality in my use of her name.

Then the cute redhead turned and went straight to Megan, who hugged her best friend reassuringly, the two of them rocking side-to-side for a few extra moments. Cassidy would be going to USC with Megan and Kaito. I knew she'd be taken care of.

Meanwhile, Adrienne came up to me and slid an arm around my waist. "That was good, Ben." She nodded approvingly. "That was good."

The ceremony itself went off without a hitch. Our salutatorian was appropriately humorous. The valedictorian was boring and went on and on about the great things he would accomplish at Harvard. We all cruised across the stage in rapid order and shook hands with various administrators and my dad must have snapped a zillion photos with his super-zoom lens. I knew what to expect. I'd been there for Brandi's graduation.

But this time, my parents also went nuts for Adrienne. They seemed just as proud of her as if she'd been their own flesh and blood, snapping zillions of photos when she walked across the stage. Eden and Emma even met her at the bottom of the ramp, screaming her name while she burst into tears at the drama of the situation. In the end, she hugged my parents and my siblings fiercely as if unable to believe we were truly treating her like family.

Afterwards, we all mingled with the parents. Cassidy's parents never knew we'd dated, but Megan's and Allie's parents knew and were surprisingly cordial to me when we all met up. I think it didn't hurt that the dads were slightly in awe of Adrienne, standing by my side. Then, amongst the throng of random people going in every direction, we managed to re-locate most of our friends and say our final, chaste goodbyes before leaving for good.

JUNE 2002, SUMMER BREAK

To be honest, Adrienne and I had been pretty amped up over the past week with all the goodbyes and celebrations and, oh yeah, FINALS. Between that week and the strain of her grieving for her lost family, it was inevitable that the two of us would eventually crash, and Saturday night was it.

We'd gone out to a big family dinner, Adrienne and I both wearing our graduation caps in the restaurant, although we'd shed the gowns. But immediately upon returning home, we slipped into bed together and promptly fell asleep around 7pm. We left the door open lest we give the twins any ideas, but we stayed asleep until about noon on Sunday.

The remainder of Sunday was a quiet day of rest. We didn't go out. We didn't meet up with friends. We barely even spoke to the rest of the family. Yeah, we had a quiet lovemaking session. It WAS Adrienne and me, after all. But for the most part, it was simply a day of recovery from all that had come before.

And perhaps illustrating that Adrienne was finally over her grief, Sunday night was the night she actually moved into Brandi's old bedroom.

I slept like crap on Sunday night. I'd gotten rather used to Adrienne's presence in my bed, seeing as she'd snuck into my room after the twins went to bed every single night since she'd moved in with us. On Monday morning, it didn't seem like Adrienne had slept too great either, but she was committed to making her relationship with the rest of my family work and not to take unfair advantage of their graciousness. We'd known the move was inevitable. But it didn't mean we didn't miss each other. At least I still had hope for future midnight liaisons with my girlfriend/adopted sister.

Further emphasizing the change, on Monday we rearranged Brandi's room a bit, with my older sister's remote permission, of course. Posters were taken down and furniture was moved into different locations. We didn't expect it to be a permanent change, Adrienne WAS after all leaving for Berkeley in a few months; but at least this way she felt less like she was invading Brandi's space and more that it was 'her' room in our house. Brandi's personal gear was packed up and stored to the side.

"This is your room now, Adrienne," Mom insisted. "We'll stash Brandi somewhere when she comes by at the end of summer."

"Yeah. In Ben's bed," Brooke muttered under her breath. Adrienne chuckled and Mom just gave my little sister 'The Look'.

In the afternoon, Adrienne and I headed out to rendezvous with the core crew friends, plus Heather and Lynne. Yeah, we'd just seen each other two days prior, at Graduation. But now it was a Monday, our parents were at work, and we were free in that limbo between being schoolkids and college adults.

It was a strangely quiet day, everyone a little introspective. Yeah, we joked around and chatted like always, but it was never far from our minds that each passing minute was one less we had together. I made a comment as such and Allie replied quietly that this was exactly how she'd felt dating me. There was such a poignant melancholy in her voice that everyone went silent at that. And I caught Cassidy looking at me rather wistfully, a jealousy in her eyes when she then glanced at Allie.

But then it was time for us all to head in and see a matinee movie. The Bourne Identity had just come out that weekend and gotten really good word-of-mouth reviews. Adrienne collected the girls together to all go to the bathroom as a descending horde and we guys went in to reserve a block of seats.

After the movie, we got smoothies and hung out for another hour before splitting up to meet our parents in time for dinner. Curiously, I saw that Cassidy and Allie had split off and were deep in conversation, Allie doing most of the talking.

I nudged Adrienne and nodded, "What do you think that's about?"

Adrienne eyed me before grinning wryly and saying, "Not everything is about you, Ben."

My eyebrows went up in alarm. "I didn't-"

My girlfriend just giggled and wrapped me up in a hug. "Relax. I'm sure it's just girl-talk."

I let it go and returned to killing time with my other friends. Still, I couldn't help but notice that Cassidy approached Adrienne for a slightly longer-than-usual hug goodbye, complete with plenty of eye contact and firm up-and-down nod. But not wanting to make a fool of myself again, I didn't ask questions. Girl stuff, right?

Tuesday found the boys and I getting into a rather spirited game of roundball. The game started off like normal, but for some reason the intensity level was ramping up higher and higher with each passing minute. Sung was an animal inside, hitting the boards hard and making aggressive lay-up after aggressive lay- up. Kenny responded by hand-checking him a little harder and going a little more full-tilt after rebounds. Daniel was constantly on the move, not taking a single play off to just hang around the three-point line. And even Kaito was going far beyond his usually passive-self.

Since we didn't have enough guys in just our crew to play full 5-on-5, we usually met up with some other classmates. Even they started getting into the more aggressive style of play. The game was streetball, which meant nobody called ticky-tack fouls, and we all were taking full advantage. I started to think somebody might get hurt, and it nearly turned out to be me.

It came on a breakaway play when Kaito saw Sung sprinting downcourt and heaved a long-ball pass. I was the only defender back in time and not looking to give away a free lay-up, I parked myself dead in front of him and made ready to read his juke around me to get to the rim.

But Sung didn't bother to juke. He plowed right through me, losing the ball in the process and sending me sprawling across the asphalt and making me actually roll into a full backwards somersault. He'd always been a hard player, I still remember when he elbowed me in the sternum, but this was something else.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" Kenny came running. "We haven't called a charge in six months but dude, that's a pretty flagrant charge!"

"Fucker didn't move," Sung growled. He'd never fallen down.

Daniel ran straight to help me up, but I was pissed. I shrugged him off and quickly scrambled to my feet, ignoring the scratches running up my left arm and elbow. "The FUCK is your problem!" I quickly got up in Sung's face.

Two inches shorter than me but outweighing me by about fifteen pounds of muscle, Sung actually took another step closer to me. "Play the damn game."

"No!" I growled. "You got a bug up your ass today and I wanna know what the hell your problem is!"

His eyes glinted dangerously. "My problem? YOU'RE my fucking problem, Ben!"

My eyebrows furrowed in both confusion and anger that he was singling me out specifically. I had no idea why Sung would be upset with me except for ... oh. My eyes popped open as I realized the issue was. He must have just found out.

Sung also saw the recognition in my eyes and he actually backed down a bit. Exhaling loudly, he grimaced while looking away and then came back to meet my eyes. "Just tell me, man-to-man, man. Did you do it?"

Kenny interrupted with a curious, "What?"

Sung replied Kenny's question to me. "Did you sleep with Stephanie?"

A collective gasp went up from the eight other guys around us. My shoulders sagged for a second, giving my answer to everyone. Then I stood up straight and nodded. "Yes."

His fist was rather obvious; I saw it coming the whole way. But I didn't do anything to avoid it. I consciously twisted my torso with the impact to help lessen the blow, but I didn't try to evade my punishment. He hit me hard enough to send pain blossoming throughout my body, and I staggered back a few steps and hunched over, gasping for oxygen. Thankfully, Sung didn't feel the need to follow it up with further attacks.

With a clenched right fist, Sung stayed in front of me, waiting to see what I'd do. After grabbing a few more gulps of air, I stood up straight and tried to ignore the protests of my bruised ab muscles. Straightening my neck, I grimaced and said, "She said you were broken up. Was that at least true?"

Sung growled, but nodded. "Yeah."

I closed my eyes and sighed with relief. This would be a lot messier, and worse for my conscience, if they'd still been together at the time. But no matter what, I'd slept with a friend's ex-girlfriend while he was still in the 'mourning' period. While not necessarily an unexpected violation of the Bro Code, it certainly was frowned upon.

"Did you go after her?" Sung asked quietly.

I shook my head. "No."

He sighed, looking away. "Didn't think so. She talked about you and that reputation of yours. I kinda always knew what she was going to do."

"I'm sorry," I said seriously, looking him in the eye. "The timing could have been better."

He just shook his head in annoyance and turned towards Daniel. "He hasn't nailed Elaine, has he?"

Daniel's eyes shot up. "Huh? No! No!" Then Daniel looked at me, looking alarmed. "Right?"

"Right, right," I nodded hurriedly.

Sung chuckled and then looked back at me. "You're something else, Ben." Then he stepped towards me.

I grimaced and held my ribs where he'd hit me, bracing myself for an attack that wasn't coming. Wincing, I met his gaze and asked, "Are we okay?"

He sighed and then held a hand out. "Yeah. We're okay."

I shook his hand firmly, breathing a sigh of relief.

Then Sung grinned wryly. "But I'm going to make sure I keep any future girlfriends far, far away from you, Mr. Casanova."

I wasn't exactly feeling a hundred percent when I got home just after lunch. The boys toned down the aggression for the last game and then we hit Carl's Jr. for some Six Dollar Burgers. My stomach was full and I was getting my energy back, but my ribs ached where Sung had punched me and I felt pretty grimy.

I was in this state when I entered my bedroom to find a beautiful girl lying on my bed, dressed in just her underwear and smiling seductively. My jaw dropped to the floor and I gasped, "Cassidy?"

"Hi, Ben," the pretty redhead grinned. She was reclining partially on her side, her right elbow propping her up with her hips twisted to let her legs stretch towards me with an enticing flex. She ran the fingers of her left hand through her long, coppery-red hair. Her bright green eyes sparkled. And those freckles I loved so much popped out when she smiled.

"What the-? What is going on?" I stammered.

"Same old Ben." Cassidy turned her gaze to the corner of my room, where I hadn't even noticed Adrienne was standing while fully clothed. "Megan and I frequently had to spell it out for him."

"Oh, he warned me," Adrienne nodded and then turned her gaze to me. "Still, I'd thought you'd have figured out what's going on after all those girls came by last week for the very same thing."

"But ... but..." I fumbled. I was thoroughly confused.

"It's about closure, Ben," Cassidy nodded. "If I don't do this, I'll wonder for the rest of my life what might have been. I spent too long dreaming of getting back together with you, Ben. I know it's impossible for us to ever be the way it was with the two of us and Megan. But..." She glanced at Adrienne. "Your girlfriend offered to let me have just one more afternoon with you."

"I'd start in the shower," Adrienne told Cassidy as she walked towards me. My stunningly gorgeous girlfriend stepped up and held my sweaty cheeks, kissing me firmly but without any tongue. "Mmm-wah! Am I the perfect girlfriend or what?"

I blinked. "One of a kind," I breathed in amazement. Then Adrienne stepped outside and turned the corner.

I returned my gaze to the beautiful redhead, who stood up from my bed and started approaching. I remembered this particular set of underwear she was wearing, a satin green that brought out her eyes. It wasn't particularly sheer or sexy. The panties were perhaps a little small since Cassidy's hips had filled out a bit in the past year and a half. And the standard bra cups nicely supported her C- cup breasts. Overall, the whole package just brought a wave of nostalgic fondness back to me. "You're beautiful, uh, Cassidy," I said, pausing over the use of her name.

She stopped and brought her hands up to my chest. "I know we can't go back in time, but I still like it when you call me 'Freckles'."

I grinned, immediately feeling much more at ease. "Help me clean up, Freckles?"

She smiled brilliantly. "You're a dream come true."

Cassidy actually freaked out a bit in the bathroom when she saw the purplish bruise on my lower torso, and the scrapes up the back of my left arm. I shrugged them off as nothing serious, "Basketball injuries" as I put them.

Cassidy raised her eyebrows questioningly at me, clearly seeing the obvious deception in my eyes. "You're still a terrible liar, Ben."

"It's nothing," I said seriously. "It's dealt with."

The redhead nodded and then proceeded to pay extra careful attention to soaping me once we got into the shower. She seemed fascinated by my musculature, saying, "You've grown so much since I last saw you like this."

I brought my hands up to cup her wet, soapy breasts, squeezing them lightly. "You, too," I chuckled.

Cassidy just giggled and then finally leaned into me for our first kiss of the day. We then continued washing each other up, and by the time we got out to dry off, my cock was at full mast and her trimmed red bush was dotted with moisture that just wouldn't dry away.

We french-kissed for a little while in my bedroom without bothering to re-dress. I then lay Cassidy down gently, kissing my way along her neckline and suckling her tits as I worked my way lower and raced through my memory for all her trigger spots. I had a "user's manual" of sorts for every girl I'd spent a lot of time with, and it took me a little while to remember Cassidy's. But I got it by the time my lips made it down to her pussy. And with a wolfish grin of excitement, I dived right in.

One day, a long time ago, I'd given Cassidy her very first oral orgasm. That had also been the fateful day we'd first fucked and I'd cum in her and nearly destroyed my relationships with both her and Megan at the same time. It seemed like AGES ago. But here we were again, and while Cassidy's sexual experience since then had certainly changed, her fundamental responses had not. And on this day, I gave her many more than just one oral orgasm.

It didn't hurt that she kept screaming, "More! More! Gimme more! I love this!" So I just ate her out until my jaw nearly fell off.

When Cassidy finally pushed my head away to curl into a fetal position and sob from repeated overwhelming orgasms, I just gasped for air and wiped my soaking wet face all over my own sheets. I'd never seen a girl keep cumming like that. I'd lost count of how many times she tensed up and squirted more fluid into my face, and it seemed like each orgasm just kept rolling into the next.

"Holy shit..." Cassidy groaned somewhere behind the back of my head. "That's never happened before."

I just tried to roll my eyeballs around and stretch my cheeks, fighting to stay awake after exhausting myself eating her out. After all, we weren't done yet.

As if proving my point, I then felt Cassidy lifting me onto the bed and rolling me onto my back. My dick had gone limp while I spent so much time munching on Cassidy's pussy. But she just brushed her red bangs behind her ears and hunched over me, taking my prick between her thumb and forefinger while smiling impishly. "I know you're tired from all that, baby. But now it's my turn." And with that she bent over and set to bringing me back to life.

She was doing a fantastic job of reviving me, with perfect pressure and firmness and tongue. I started to remember that I was the one who'd taught Cassidy how to give a proper blowjob, the techniques of course oriented towards the things that I liked. And midway through Cassidy's blowjob, I started chuckling. The cute redhead pulled her mouth off my prick, licked her lips and asked, "What?"

I chuckled some more and then said, "I was just remembering how Drew claimed you couldn't suck dick to save your life." I groaned in happy pleasure as she continued jacking me in her hands, even as she started grinning as well. "He fucking doesn't know what he's missing."

"Thanks to you," Cassidy grinned, and then she dived back down onto me. And as she resumed her technically proficient blowjob, she also began attacking me with a passionate fury that was pulling me over the edge.

I buried my hands in her hair and helped guide her head rapidly bobbing up and down my shaft, grunting, "Oh, Freckles! Suck me, baby! So fucking good! You're gonna make me cum in your mouth!"

My words only spurred her into sucking me even harder while she rolled her eyes up to stare back at me adoringly. I loved watching her watching me, and after another minute of frantic sucks and tightly-clenched hands jacking my rod, I bellowed and began filling my cute ex-girlfriend's mouth with my creamy load of cum. Her eyes flew open when she felt the jets of spunk splashing into her mouth. And while I held her head pinned down around my cock, I watched her throat muscles contracting quickly to swallow down each burst.

When I was done, I pulled her up my body, sliding my hands all over her naked goodies while bringing her face just above mine and then craning my head up to kiss her happily in thanks. And this time it was Cassidy's turn to chuckle and break the kiss.

"What?"

She giggled some more. "You know you're still the only guy I've ever been with who will kiss me after cumming in my mouth? Even Cameron wouldn't do it, calling it 'gay'."

I grinned. "Is that why you dumped him, what, three times?"

"Maybe..." Her green eyes twinkled, and then she dove her lips back down onto me again. And this time, we didn't stop kissing until she'd settled her hips over mine and she began grinding her still wet crotch over my not-quite-soft dick.