Chapter 30

We headed south for Palm Desert and the Samsung World Championship. This was a big-payday tournament, and most of the name golfers came back out of their mid-season vacations to appear in it. Few of these professionals would be going with us to Korea for another tournament the following week. Tess, in all likelihood, would have skipped the Korean event in order to provide herself more time for the other two Asian tournaments coming up later. But in honor of her friendship with Kim, she decided to play.

It would also give us an opportunity to meet Kim's family.

Kim wasn't focused, however, on seeing her family again the following week. She was spending a lot of her leisure time, evenings, on the telephone, talking to Roland Hidalgo. He wasn't always in Portland. He traveled a lot, apparently, on business. But, wherever he was on the road these days, he was staying in touch with Kimmy.

It was like a high school romance. Kim was still all business during the day, at practice, and she was unstinting, spending long hours in preparation.

But at night, the little cell phone looked as if it were grafted to her ear.

Tess and I would look at Kim, look at each other, and exchange sly smiles.

Ain't love grand?

It was the Wednesday night before the opening of the Samsung. Kim's traditional exclusive night of love. But, right now at least, she was talking to Roland on the phone. Tess and I had just turned off the television set and, as we sat there alone, I brought up a topic I'd been thinking about a lot.

"You know, Tess, this trip to the Far East is going to be god-awful expensive. You could save a bundle by leaving me behind, and just hiring local caddies for all three events. I mean, what am I going to be able to contribute that's worth airfare across the Pacific, up and down the China Sea, and God knows what other expenses?"

"You don't want to go to Korea? Meet Kim's people? See Thailand? Japan?"

"Sure I want to... But this shouldn't be about what I want. It should be about what you need. I mean, I started out as your RV driver. Not much market for RV drivers on field trips across the Pacific Ocean."

"You're too modest. You contribute a lot more than just driving the bus. You're my main man, Will. You're my massage therapist. You're my disciplinarian. What if I get the urge to leave my bra back in the hotel while we're in some faraway land across the sea? What if it's, maybe, a land with harsh, puritanical impulses? Who's gonna make me put on the iron bra?"

"I'm just thinking about the money," I said. "I know you've done very well. I know you've had a great first year. But you could save some real money, leaving me home."

"Forget it. Ain't gonna happen."

"OK. And, thanks, Babe... I'm glad you won the argument. You know I really do want to go."

"You're worth it, Will. Never doubt it."

"Thanks... But, Tess, listen: There's something else. Our original deal, last year, about my salary, and my bonuses for your prize winnings? I'm getting 'way more money, now, than was ever expected, by either of us, in that deal. That percentage of your winnings that I'm getting -- it was in contemplation of the low-ball prizes available on the Futures Tour. It's ridiculous, now, what I'm being paid! I can't believe you gave me ten percent of your British Open winnings! And on top of my regular pay and expenses. That's just insane, Sweetheart!"

"You really think ten percent is too much?" Tess said. "Gosh, you know, I've been thinking about that, some, myself. About our maybe discussing an adjustment."

"Well, I'm more than willing, Tess! It's only right. Tell you what -- you just write out what you think would be fair, and I'll go along with it, just like that!... And maybe we ought to reduce my standard salary, too -- especially for periods like now, when we're not even using the RV."

Tess was quiet for a moment. "Actually, Will, my thinking was, maybe you shouldn't be on a salary at all."

Well, that shocked me a little. But if she was proposing that I work strictly on a percentage-of-winnings basis, I could see where that might be a fair way of readjusting the dollar costs of our relationship.

"That's OK by me, too, Baby. I guess, though, I would still need to be paid something for expenses -- at least for these exotic foreign trips."

"No, Will. You're not understanding me. I think we should set things up so that we'd be more like -- partners."

"We're pretty much like partners already," I told her. "You're just the senior partner, 90-10. But I cost you a lot more than just that 10 percent. I'm pretty high-maintenance, during travel periods!"

"No, Will. I'm not proposing to cut back on your income. You're really not a very good businessman, are you? You're no negotiator, that's for sure. I'm talking about a real partnership! Shared expenses. Shared everything. Not 90-10. More like 50-50."

"Fifty-fifty?" I said, incredulous. "You'd better talk about that one with your accountant -- and your dad! That's not a very smart thing to propose, Tess!"

"Will, honestly!... Do I have to beg? Do I have to spell it out for you?... I'm thinking that we ought to get married."

"Married? Holy shit, Tess! You want to get married? To me?"

"It's a helluva thing, when a girl has to be the one who proposes marriage."

"Tess, Jesus, I'd have asked you to marry me months ago, if I'd had the slightest idea that you'd say 'yes.' I've always assumed that you were... a long way from being ready for... that!"

"If you had asked me several months ago, you're probably right," Tess said, "I probably would have said 'no.' But we've been through so much together, Will. And you're really weird, sometimes, but you're always solid, and you've always been there for me, when I needed you."

"You don't have to be the one to ask me, Tess!" I said. "Let me ask you -- right now -- for the record... Will you marry me, Tess?"

Well, she had just proposed marriage to me, right? And now I was proposing it right back at her, so, naturally, I expected her to give me a big "Yes!" like they do in the movies, and then she'd crush me up against those big boobs, and we'd try to out-squeeze each other, and live happily ever after.

But Tess paused now, and instead of the "yes" I expected, she said, "We've got an awful lot of things to talk about, Will, before we consider getting married."

Was this a joke? Was she just trying to push me off-balance and then keep me that way? Well, she had succeeded, whether she was trying or not.

"What kinds of things, Tess?"

"Serious things," she said. "Things that, maybe, you won't want to hear from me -- especially as part of a proposal of marriage."

"Don't be vague and general, Tess. For God's sake, spit it out."

"All right. For starters, there's Kimmy. I would want us to still... have a special relationship with Kim. And, in the future, if Kim were to leave us, or if she got married herself, and maybe lived elsewhere, or felt differently about our relationship... Well, then I might want to have a relationship with some other woman."

"Would it be... like now? I mean, where both of us were in on it, with this other woman?"

"That would be the way that I would want it, and what I would prefer," Tess said. "But. It could be different. Right now, Kim cares about both of us, but, from a sexual standpoint, she cares mostly about you. It might be possible that, in the future, I would meet a woman who cared more about me, than she did about you."

"I wouldn't be keeping score, on who this other woman's favorite was," I told Tess, "... but if it were a situation where I was... just baggage... If this other woman considered me as just a nuisance, or just a duty she had to fulfill, in order to be with you... well, something like that would be hard to take."

"That's understandable," Tess said. "All I can promise is, I wouldn't enter into any such relationship -- one that would have the effect of humiliating you, or of leaving you out in the cold... I can't imagine my wanting to be involved with a woman who didn't care for you, too."

"Another thing, though," I said. "If there are going to be... others... entering into our relationship, it's always got to be out in the open: no clandestine affairs. No sneaking around."

"I absolutely agree," Tess said. "And, Will: If you ever met another woman that you... wanted. It would work the same way."

"I would bring her home to meet Mama, you mean?"

"Yes. But I don't mean she would have to... go both ways. It would be enough, for me, that you didn't... hide her from me."

Tess was, obviously, trying to be democratic, fair, and above-board. The question I had to ask next was the one I dreaded most -- hearing the answer.

But, finally, I asked it: "What about... your side of that? What about other men?"

"Will, I don't know what to say, to that. I don't have any... plans... to be with any other man. But you know that I am... highly sexed. You know that -- I've told you already that -- I've had good sex with other men, in the past. Will, it's really hard for me to stand here and say to you that I would never be interested in another man!"

I had expected that answer, but I still hated hearing it. Talk about your approach-avoidance conflicts! The idea of marriage to Tess was as appealing to me as if I were a kid, being told he was going to spend two weeks at Disney World.