Chapter 19

Winter at last became Spring and Richard delighted, as he always did, in the burgeoning trees. He took particular joy in the chestnut trees: their big, dark, sticky buds breaking out into delicate, soft, green parasols of leaves which would later be huge. Later he would glory in the early delicate green of the beeches.

His life with Sharon continued but had settled down to more of a routine. There was nothing less passionate about their love-making but there were no more dramas like Louise. Richard did take her out to a pub a couple of times and they found themselves at ease, enjoying their time together without sex but, as he was the first to admit, it was no more than that. He would not want to make a habit of it because it would swiftly lead to boredom with her. Thankfully, there were no more emotional and tearful outbursts.

Sharon might have become submissive with him but it was quite clear she had not changed at home.

"Remember that bloke with the loud music I told you about?" she asked one Wednesday morning.

"Yes!"

"He came up to me the other day. 'I 'ope you're bloody satisfied, you bitch, ' he said. 'Oo are you callin' a bitch, my lad?' I says. 'You!' 'e says. The bloody council served a notice on me an' if anyone complains about noisy music they'll take all me bloody kit away.' 'Good on 'em', I says. 'Serve you bloody well right an' don't you start mouthing me or I'll 'ave you bloody evicted as well. You need to start thinking about other people for a change. If you do they might even come to like you, including me. But you go on being a prick an' I'll bloody 'ave you.' I left 'im gawping like a bloody fish bu-ut two days later a little note comes through the letter box saying he was sorry and that he'd bought some headphones. How about that?"

"Great! You did well there. I hope it doesn't wear off."

"It better bloody hadn't. I don't say things I don't mean."

"I'm glad I haven't got on the wrong side of you, Sharon."

"Dead right... Sir," she grinned.

Then, later that morning when she had led him upstairs, she in turn jarred his complacency.

"I want you to fuck my bum, " she announced.

"Oh dear!" he said. "I hoped you never ask that."

"Why not? Lots of people do it."

"You've been on the internet again, haven't you?"

"So?"

"Lots of people don't as well."

"So what's wrong?"

"It's not natural."

"What do you mean it's not natural?"

"Just that! Your anus is designed to extrude and nothing more."

"Extrude? Come on, Sir. Don't baffle me with science."

"Push stuff out, Sharon, and not to take anything in whereas your fanny is designed specially to do both: take in a man's cock and then push a baby out."

"Mmm! But people do it."

"Yes, they do but I think they probably forget that the back passage is the body's main drain and that what comes out is full of bacteria and germs and yuck."

"So wear a condom."

"OK but it's still not a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Because it's unnatural, as I say."

"So what makes oral sex natural?"

"Because the mouth can cope with in and out and is also wide enough to take a man's cock. In addition, the lips and tongue are parts of us which are designed to give physical pleasure. Same goes really when I go down on you"

"I still can't see why, if I want to give you my bum, you can't take it."

"Sharon, my pet, as I say, it's not natural. It would hurt you and we'd have to spend ages loosening you up not to mention using a whole tube of KY to keep you lubricated. There's no natural lubrication in your anal passage."

"So? It was painful when I lost my virginity."

"Yes, my pet, but only for a short while, I'll bet."

"Yeah, that's true."

"If I bugger you, to put it crudely, you'll feel pain and will be uncomfortable for several days."

"So that's what a bugger is. I thought it was just another name for a shit or a bastard."

"That's right and I'm not sure that it, or sodomy as it's also called isn't still a crime."

"Well, I'm not going to call the cops."