Chapter 3

About midnight there was a knock on my door. I was just sitting there on the couch thinking about my problems. I had put my three kids to bed, hugging and kissing each one of them wondering if they were mine. Hell, I wanted a drink so bad but with the liver operation I wasn't allowed alcohol for maybe a year. I was startled by the knocking and I heard it again. I looked out and saw a police officer. I opened the door:

"I'm Officer Bates of the Sheriff's Department. Are you Andrew Connors? The husband of a Trina Connors?" the officer asked.

"Yes, officer, I am. What's going on here?"

"I'm sorry to inform you that your wife was killed in an auto accident in rural Illinois. I was asked by the Illinois post to inform you of her death."

I was shocked. One minute I hated her guts and wanted to kill her, now she's dead. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. I wanted to wake up, hoping I was sleeping and that the last couple of days had been a bad dream. But it wasn't a dream and I wasn't sleeping.

"What happened, officer? Are you sure it was her? Maybe there was a mistake." I was just mumbling on.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Connors, there is no mistake. It was an auto accident and they were both killed. According to the report I received, their car went off the road, over an embankment and hit a tree. Both occupants were dead at the scene."

"You said, 'they.' Was Maria the other person in the car?"

"No, sir, it was a Zack Carter. Did you know him?"

I was stunned; I thought it was probably Trina and Maria coming home early, but it wasn't. It meant that she still spent the day and evening with Zack even after she had talked to me. I knew I had to answer the officer.

"Yes, he was from the company's Chicago office. I haven't seen him in years. What time did the accident occur?"

"Around seven o'clock, give or take a few minutes. It took us awhile to gather information and get in touch with you. Again, Mr Connors, I'm sorry to have been the one to tell you but we wanted you to be one of the first to know. If you contact the Chicago Sheriff's office tomorrow, they might be able to tell you more. Good night, sir."

"Thank you, officer," I said as I closed the door.

At this point I was numb. I felt hate, loss, love, disgust, and even fear. Fear of what to do next. I had three little children who were fast asleep and tomorrow I had to tell them their mom was killed. I couldn't go to sleep and I really didn't want to call anyone at this time of night. I knew tomorrow would be one of the worst days of my life. I had to face reality. Trina was dead and I had three kids to care for who might not even be mine. I wouldn't wish this situation on anyone.

I must have dozed off in the chair and was awakened by the phone at seven in the morning. The caller ID said personal call. I answered it.

"Mr. Andrew Connors?" the voice said.

"Yes, it's he. Who's calling?"

"One second sir," the voice said. Then I heard a female voice, one I had heard yesterday.

"Mr. Connors, this is Senator Conroy... I mean Janice Conroy. Under the circumstances I would prefer to be called by my given name. I know you've been notified of the accident. I'm so sorry for your loss but I needed to talk to you. I need a big favor."

"Mrs. Conroy, you lost your husband also. I know the situation doesn't look good for either of us. What is the favor you need?"

"Can you not mention the affair between my husband and your wife? I know this will sound bad but it will ruin my political future. There is nothing I can do to change things now, but it will ruin my life."

"So you want me to lie and say it didn't happen?"

"No, of course not. I just don't want you to tell the media about the affair. You will get a few calls. I can take care of it at this end and let it quietly go away, but I know someone will look for a story here. It wouldn't be good for either of us."

"Mrs. Conroy, I'll keep the affair personal if you do two things for me."

"What is it you want? I'll do it if I can."

"I want the real report on this accident. The one that gets hidden by high profile people. The other thing I want is a copy of Zack's DNA; you know what that's for."

"I'll do what I can..."

"I'll expect it shortly after the funerals. Please don't mistake me for some type of sissy. I want to know... no, make that I need to know... the truth at any cost."

"I'll get you want you want. I just hope you're a man of your word and keep the affair under wraps."

"I always keep my promises, Janice, always."

"Okay then, I'll get the reports to you as soon as possible, and thank you."

I hung up the phone and made a pot of coffee. I knew it was still early but I called Jen and told her about the accident. It took her by surprise but she said she would be right over. My mom and dad always got up early and I let them know also. Now for the harder part. I called Trina's mom and dad. Her dad answered the phone and I broke the sad news to him. I explained as much as I could and told them that she and Zack had just gone out for dinner and Zack was taking her back to her hotel when the accident occurred. They asked me to keep in touch and of course I said I would.

My kids got up and I fixed them some breakfast and after Jen showed up we took the three kids into the living room and told them we had some very sad news.

"Renee, Ashley, you will have to be very brave. Mommy died and will not be coming home."

The tears just welled up in their eyes and they started crying. Of course when little Andy saw his sisters crying he started crying also. It was the hardest thing watching my kids cry. I held each one of them and let them cry it out. I was trying to be strong for them but I was crying too. I was holding the girls and Jen was holding Andy. We did our best to try and answer their questions.

There was a knock on the door and Jen just yelled come in. It was Mel.

"I'm so sorry to hear what happened." She and Andrea both were crying. Ashley ran to Mel and climbed on her lap as Mel sat down and gently rocked my youngest daughter. Andrea sat next to her mother.

"How did you know?" I asked Mel.

Jen spoke up, "I called her after you called me. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not. I was just surprised."

After the kids calmed down some, Andrea offered to take them to their rooms and play games with them. It was a God send, because the phone started ringing shortly after they went to their room. It was news people and reporters. They all said the same thing, "We just have a few questions."

I was getting mad and started hanging up on them. Jen said she'd take care of the phone calls. She talked to the next reporter.

"Listen, I don't understand why all you news people keep bothering us. My brother just lost his wife and has three young children here to raise. We're not celebrities and would like our privacy. I don't care that Zack Carter is married to a politician in some other state. It has nothing to do with us. Why don't you bug her if you consider it news?"

We turned on the news and they had a news report that said, "A local woman was killed in Chicago last night. She was with the husband of State Senator Janice Conroy. Senator Conroy said that the woman, a Trina Connors from Ohio, was an associate of Zack Carter and they were just returning from having dinner. She had talked to her husband earlier that evening and said she wouldn't be able to join them. She is very saddened by the loss of her husband and has sent out condolences to Mr. Connors and his family in Ohio. We will have more details on this story as they come in."

"Well, we knew why we were getting the calls. I think we ought to have a story ready for these stupid reporters and keep saying the same thing over and over till they leave us alone. I'll take the next call, Jen," I said.

"Hello. Yes, this is Andrew Connors. Look, I don't understand all these calls. I'll just tell you what I know. Zack Carter and my wife, Trina, worked for the same travel agency but in different states. They have meetings periodically and discuss travel opportunities. All they did was have dinner and were returning to her place when the accident occurred."

The person kept asking questions. "Yes, I talked to my wife that morning and was aware of her going to dinner. They were friends from high school. I knew Zack personally. We all went to school together. It was a terrible accident and she will be terribly missed by me and our three children. I suggest if you have further questions that you contact the Senator."

I hung up after that. Jen and I took turns answering the stupid phone. We knew they wouldn't stop calling till we said something to them.

The phone was ringing off the hook. I'm sure glad Jen had called Mel. It would have been hard watching the kids and continually answering the phone and answering the door.

We did get a few calls from concerned neighbors and friends. They were hard enough to deal with, let alone all the other calls. Like we didn't have enough problems. Lawyer after lawyer were calling us also, asking if we wanted representation in case of a lawsuit. We basically told them to go to hell and that we weren't suing anyone. If we wanted to be represented it wouldn't be by a ambulance chaser.

Later in the day the calls seemed to wan somewhat. Mel made us all some lunch. Actually neighbors had brought over food to eat and Mel set it all up for us. I had hardly talked to her but was sure glad she was there.

A odd thing about a death in the family is a lot of people bring you food when you least have an appetite. At least we didn't have to worry about cooking anything.

There was a knock at the door and I figured it was another neighbor but it was a damn television reporter.

"Mr. Connors, can we have a word with you?" said a woman with a microphone with a cameraman behind her."

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Coming to my damn house a day after I lose my wife and for what? Some damn gossip?"

"No need to swear, Mr. Connors, this is for television."

"Fuck your damn television. I lost my wife and my three little children have lost their mother and all you can think about is news. Maybe you can get pictures of her body splattered all over the fucking highway and get one or two more readers. You make me sick."

"Mr. Connors, we just want the truth."

"No, you don't, you want some fucking lies to sell to your listeners. I'll give you the truth and see if you're happy with it.

"My wife and Zack were high school sweethearts many years ago."

"Were they lovers, Mr. Connors?"

"Lovers? They were sixteen year old kids. Do you classify that as lovers? You're one sick person. My wife and I got married and have three children ages two, four, and six. She works full time in a travel agency. You tell me when she had time for a torrid affair with an old boyfriend two states away."

"... but she was with him."

"Yes, they had a business meeting in Chicago and went to dinner. A lot of old friends have dinner together. I talked to her earlier in the day and if you listened to your own TV station you would have heard that Senator Conroy was going to go to dinner with them. All you want is some damn gossip and try to ruin lives."

Right then little Andy was looking out the storm door.

"Look at the door at my son. Tell him how you think his mother is a slut and all she wanted was an affair with an old boyfriend. Tell my little boy that his mother didn't love him that all she could think about was wanting to have sex with another woman's husband." I wanted to say fuck so bad, but out of respect to my kids being present at the door, I didn't.

"You disgust me. I've said that I wouldn't wish this type of situation on my worst enemy, but in your case, I might make an exception. Let some reporter tear your life apart with a lot of lies and allegations and let you live with it. One last thing, if I hear any lies about my wife or family on your news network, you can take it to the bank that I'll sue your ass along with your network. You weren't invited here and no celebrity lives here. Now get the hell off my property."

When I walked back in the house, I picked up my boy and just hugged him, and he hugged me back. Jen smiled at me. She knew I didn't actually tell the total truth but hopefully the reporters didn't know it.

Things seemed to calm down after that. The kids were back playing in the room and Jen and Mel were talking about funeral arrangements. They would be shipping back Trina's body within the next two days and we wanted the funeral as soon as possible.

The women told me they would take care of all the arrangements which was fine with me. I was lost when it came to things like that. I walked to the bathroom and when I came out I glanced in the room where the girls were playing. I overheard Ashley talking to Andrea.

"I miss my mommy."

"I know how you feel Ash. I miss my daddy — well, his name was Eric. He wasn't my real daddy but I do miss him. He was always around."

"Why did he leave you?" asked Ashley.

"Because he wasn't my real dad."

"Daddies shouldn't leave their little girls. It's not nice," replied Ashley.

"It's okay. I have another daddy now and it's my real daddy and he's your daddy too."

"Ashley, do you think your mommy will be my mommy too? Since we are sharing the same daddy, why can't we share the same mommy?"

It brought tears to my eyes when I heard my little girl say that. I didn't want them to know I was listening.

"I'll tell you what, Ash, you talk with your dad and I'll talk with my mom and we'll see what happens. No matter what I'll always be your big sister and you can always come to me." I watched as Andrea gave Ashley a hug.

The calls had pretty much stopped the next couple of days. The news reporter who came to our house only showed the nice part of our talk saying what a wonderful wife and mother Trina was. I guess the station didn't want to take a chance on a libel suit. There was also a big divorce with a Hollywood couple which took over the news. Our accident case was now becoming old news.

Jen and Mel did a great job with the funeral arrangements. We had Trina laid out one night and the burial the following day. I couldn't believe the people that showed up. Jen and I stood by the coffin and greeted everyone who came to pay their respects. Mel sat on a couch over to the side with the four kids. She wanted to stay out of the way. Everytime I looked over at her she had a different one of my kids on her lap. One minute they would be crying and the next laughing. Every once in awhile one of them would come up and stand with me.

When we paid our last respects to Trina before they closed the coffin, we all cried. So sad and yet so stupid. She could have had a great life but was looking for the greener grass. Mel asked her church to set up a luncheon for all who attended the funeral. It was a wonderful meal and gave us a last chance to talk with many of our friends. I even thanked Maria and Bob for coming. I talked to Maria for a minute and said that I hope she learned a lesson from Trina's death. She had a good man and should do everything she could to keep her marriage intact.

She hugged me and thanked me for keeping our secret. I really did hope she learned from Trina's mistake.

In the days that followed, Mel and Jen asked what things of Trina's we wanted to keep. I told them I didn't have any idea. I told them to give all the jewelry and keepsakes to the girls. Most they put away for future use but gave the girls enough to play grown up in.

Mel remarked what beautiful clothes Trina had. I told her she could keep and wear whatever she wanted seeing they were similar in size. If looks could kill, sweet Mel would have killed me on the spot.

Jen started laughing. "You stupid, stupid man. You want to give your deceased wife's clothes to your old girlfriend. I don't think so, little brother."

"She said they were nice. I was just trying to be agreeable and let her have what she wanted. Women! I'll never understand them. What should we do with them?"

Jen looked at Mel, like I wasn't even there. "Let's have a garage sale and sell all the clothes. They should bring a decent price."

So that was the next thing they were going to do.

The phone rang and I heard a familiar voice on the other end. After hanging up I asked the gals if they could take the kids to the park or somewhere for a couple of hours. I had a person stopping by to talk to me and we needed to be alone. I told them I would explain it to them later.

After they had left, there was a knock on the door. It was Senator Janice Conroy and her driver. "Please come in. I've been waiting for you."

She had her driver sit on the porch and came inside. I was surprised at her appearance. She was a very nice looking woman but was probably in her fifties. I had no idea that she was that old since Zack was our age.

"Mr. Connors, I was in Columbus, Ohio on some state business and thought I'd take this short trip to give you the information you requested." She handed me a manila envelope which she said contained the un-official accident report as well as Zack's DNA chart.

"Would you like a cup of coffee, Mrs. Conroy?"

"Please, for today just call me Janice, and a cup of coffee would be nice. Just a little cream please. I want to thank you for being discreet about the affair. Nothing good would have come out of it if the truth were known. I got a call from the insurance company and they asked me to talk to you about settling the matter."

"Janice, I don't want your money. I just want it over with so my family and I can go on with our lives."

"Andy, you will get dozens of calls from lawyers saying they can get you millions of dollars if you go with their firms. The truth is the case can stay open for years while they delve deeper and deeper into the case. The insurance company doesn't want that to happen and neither do I. They made you an offer. If you accept it, then the case is over. You won't be bugged anymore since the case is settled."

"What's this offer you keep mentioning? Is it your money? As I have mentioned, I just want it over."

"It's the insurance company's money. They will give you one hundred thousand dollars for each of your kids and deposit into a trust account. It will be payable after they are eighteen years of age and you would be the custodian of the account. The kids will only get money when you say so till they're twenty five. Then they will be in charge of their own accounts."

"Why are they offering this money? Was there some type of wrongdoing?"

"No, it's just that everyone today is sue crazy. It's easier to sue someone than go find work. This just closes the account. They will also pay for any medical things since the accident. You know, hospital bill, ambulance and what ever other charges they drum up. So you'll get three hundred thousand dollars plus the payment for medical."

"It's four hundred thousand plus medical. I have four kids not three. My other daughter lives with her mother but if I'm to accept this, she should receive a share also."

"I'm sorry, I wasn't aware of it. So I'll make sure you get enough for all four children. So, if we are done here, I'd like..."

"Janice, this is probably the last time I'll see you. Can you tell me about you and Zack and why you let this go on after finding out?"