Chapter 6

The wind blows, scattering the fallen leaves of fall. A solitary set of boots make their way to the until then forbidden area.

Ah Hello, I know I haven't been by since, well since then. I'm sorry. I just couldn't. I know I should have. I disappointed you. I failed. I-

The figure turns and starts to leave, then stops and steels himself. Slowly he returns.

Damn, I told myself that I could do this. I just. I just miss you so much Andy. I know what the doctors say. But I can't help but think that if I had made you go to the doctors sooner. If I had insisted on the tests sooner, that maybe we could have caught this.

The wind blows again; the cold bite of the changing season threatens to chill him.

You would think that now, with all those treatments and chemicals and fancy gizmos that we have that we could have stopped it. Ovarian Cancer. You know Andy, Amanda and I have joined a support group for survivors or it. It's really helped but I can still feel the hole in my soul that was made when I lost you. Amanda helps but she feels it too.

I make sure that she gets tested regularly. The kids also get regular check ups. Paranoid I know but I can't go though this again. Not now.

He takes a deep intake of breath to gather himself.

Well enough about me.

The kids. Well Michael, as I guess you know, you would be watching, his baseball dreams went up in smoke. One bad play and a torn shoulder and he's out. But he's doing his best. He graduates this spring from college. Then it's on to law school. I told you he was going to be a lawyer.

He's met a nice girl. Weirded me out when I first met her. Pink hair and all but she's nice. She has good parents too. They came down over the summer. I've even got a business deal or two going on with the father. Amanda thinks her mother is a riot.

Lisa, well did you know there is a professional softball team? Well there is and they are scouting her. But she wants to try for the Olympics. I say go for it no matter what. Guess I will have to get the expanded cable package to see my little girl play in the big leagues.

Lane is doing well. Studying some biological computer thing at MIT. Kelly and Kathy graduate from high school this year. I never had to worry about boys with Lisa after our talk all those years ago. But those two? Lord they are the twin terrors on male physiology. Amanda and I keep a good eye on them, don't you worry.

Mel is doing well in school. Did you know there was a shooting team on the campus? I didn't either. Well she made the team, came in third last year at the nationals. I think she wants to join the military then become a cop. I still remember when all she wanted was to play with her Barbies.

They grow up too fast.

Evan scared the crap out of me last week. He's 'decided' that he's gay. He's not even in high school yet and he's talking about boyfriends. Wow.

Amber thinks it's just a phase he's going through. Then again I have caught her talking with the Looney gal in private too many times to not have my suspicions about her too. Then again I caught her kissing the little Hayes boy too.

What a wonderful mess. I wish you where here to tell me what to do.

Drops fall to the leaves. He wipes his eyes.

Ah well, Amanda is good. So are your parents.

You know you scared the hell out of me with them. I can still remember it. You hadn't been, hadn't been gone for long. We gathered in the lawyer's office; Amanda, your folks and I, just as you requested. None of us had any idea of what was going on. Then she put the video in.

I almost joined you when I saw you again. Then I noticed you were talking. Telling us that this was your will and yada and yada. Then you said that you knew that you said you would never ask me to do anything again. But you had one more request.