Chapter 5

Ed, dressed in jeans and work-shirt, sat back enjoying his cup of coffee after finishing his breakfast. He laughed as Betsy ran into the room to begin her breakfast. Any time now Ling would show up looking bedraggled as she tried to keep up with the dynamo. Betsy had already asked Marguerite to make her favorite breakfast and had sat down at the table before Leroy entered the room. Groaning, he said, “Good morning, Ed.”

“Where’s Ling?”

“I’m letting Ling sleep in a little,” said Leroy. He looked over at Betsy who was bouncing in her chair. “I don’t think we expected Betsy would be quite so energetic all of the time.”

Marguerite came out of the kitchen with a huge bowl of hot cereal. It was a double portion of food for most kids Betsy’s age, but it would barely satisfy the child’s appetite. She would eat it all and then sit lethargically for a few minutes. Once she had digested her food, she would start moving and wouldn’t stop until the next meal. Betsy started shoveling the food into her mouth, eating it so fast that Ed doubted she even tasted it.

Kelly and Kim came into the dining room. Kim’s wild tangled hair made her look as if she had just been having sex. Kelly was grinning like a cat that caught a canary. Once they had seated themselves at the table, Kelly ran a hand over Kim’s thigh. She smiled as the other woman spread her legs slightly at the intimate touch.

Kelly’s actions over the past evening had confused Ed and he didn’t understand what was in her mind. He took a sip of his coffee and considered the two women, trying to figure out the relationship that had grown between them. Something was going on and he didn’t know what it was. Shrugging his shoulders, he took a sip of his coffee deciding that time would reveal all to him.

Rubbing his chin, he knew that he had to shave and get ready for the rest of the day. He needed a haircut as well and decided that he would take a trip to the barber that morning. Kelly noticed him rubbing his face and asked, “Can we watch you shave today?”

It always amazed him how much his wives enjoyed watching him shave. On some mornings, he would wind up with all three of his wives watching him shave. With an eyebrow raised, he answered, “I was thinking of going to the barber this morning and getting a straight razor shave and a haircut.”

Betsy looked up from her bowl of hot cereal and asked, “Can I watch?”

“You want to watch me get a haircut?”

“Sure,” replied Betsy.

Kelly nodded her agreement and said, “So take Betsy with you.”

“Okay,” replied Ed wondering if he was going to end up leading a parade down to the barbershop.

Kim, talking for the first time since coming into the dining room said, “I’ll stay here with Kelly for a while.”

Ed finished his coffee and looked down the table at Betsy. She had already finished her breakfast and was sitting back with her hands folded across her bulging stomach. It would be twenty minutes before she was ready to go. He stood up to go and said, “I’ll wait for Betsy outside.”

Leroy nodded and said, “Give me about fifteen minutes to get her ready.”

Ed stepped out of the house and walked to the street to look around the neighborhood knowing that when Betsy came out, she’d race over to him. The weather was warm and he enjoyed the feeling of the Arizona sun on his skin. It was a shame that he had to interview staff and work on his will today. Spending time indoors was always hardest on nice days like this one.

The door of the house opened and Betsy came running out full steam ahead with an excited yell of joy at being able to move. He watched as she approached, her little legs covering in one minute what had taken him five. She was smiling as she moved. When she reached him, he started walking as she ran in circles around him.

As they reached the driveway of the Hayes house, the man that had rented it drove up. Ed waved and grabbed Betsy so that his neighbor could enter the drive without worrying about running over the little girl. Ed couldn’t help wondering why the neighbor was at home at that time of day. When the guy got out of his car, he carried himself as though he had the weight of the entire world on his shoulders.

Ed decided it was time to meet his neighbor and waited as the man approached. He examined the tenant of the Hayes house carefully. The man looked to be in his late twenties, with curly hair that looked difficult to control, and rather large ears that stood out from his head. Ed let Betsy loose and she immediately began running around in circles. As he watched her go, he called out, “Howdy, neighbor.”

“Hello,” replied the man in a rich masculine voice. As he approached, he extended a hand as he said, “I’m Dan Biggerstaff.”

Accepting the handshake, Ed replied, “I’m Ed Biggers. The little dynamo is my daughter, Betsy.”

“Pleased to meet you,” replied Dan as he watched Betsy take another lap around the two men. He didn’t have a clue what to say about the little girl and her hyperactive behavior.

“I heard that you are an electrical engineer.”

“Yes. Worked through the night and just got home,” said Dan. He rubbed his chin and said, “I need to shave and get some rest.”

As Betsy ran past another time, Ed replied, “I’m on my way down to the barber shop to get a good old fashioned straight razor shave.”

“They do a real shave down there?” asked Dan in surprise.

“Yes, they do,” answered Ed. Betsy stopped running in circles and ran thirty yards away. She bent over to examine something by the side of the road. Ed tried to make out what she was looking at, but just couldn’t tell. He looked over at Dan noticing the man rubbing his chin.

“I think I’ll head down there with you and get a shave,” said Dan.

“Great,” replied Ed. He looked over at Betsy and saw her dancing around. He leaned forward with his eyes squinted trying to make out what she was doing, but it was impossible to see. He turned to look at Dan and said, “Let’s catch up to the kid.”

Dan said, “Sure.”

When Ed turned to head towards where Betsy had been, he found that she had run back to them. In her little hand, she held out a four-foot long rattlesnake by its head. The snake, with a very pronounced diamond pattern on its back, was thrashing around and the rattle was shaking furiously. It was clear the snake was very irritated at its treatment. Angry, she said, “Bad snake. It tried to bite me!”

Ed grabbed the snake behind her hand and shouted, “Let go of it!”

She let go of the snake and stood there as though she was waiting for her father to punish it. In one fluid motion, Ed threw the snake as far away as possible and turned to look at Betsy. Trying to keep his voice calm, he asked, “Did it bite you?”

“No. Silly snake was slow.” She stood in front of him with her legs slightly spread and her hands on her hips, as though she disapproved of his actions of throwing the snake away. He was supposed to yell at it to behave and give it back to her.

Ed knelt down and checked her arms and legs to see if he found any sign of snakebite. There were no signs and he breathed a sigh of relief. Concerned, he asked, “What happened?”

“It tried to bite me, but it was too slow,” said Betsy with a pout, “so I caught it by the head!”

The idea that Betsy could grab a striking rattlesnake by the head sent a shiver down his spine. It was an impossible feat, but she wasn’t lying to him. Dan stared at the little kid shocked at her attitude and the incredulous at the story that she told. Ed asked, “Was it trying to bite you when you caught it?”

“Yeah,” replied Betsy started to bounce around in boredom at the conversation. She felt the need to start moving again.

“Promise me that you’ll never play with another snake like that again,” said Ed wondering how he was going to explain this to his wives.

“Okay,” replied Betsy as she took off running completely unfazed by the incident with the snake.

The matter of fact manner in which Ed had dealt with the problem had surprised Dan. He asked, “Does that happen often?”

“First time,” replied Ed shaking his head. He followed after Betsy allowing Dan to follow or stay, as was his desire.

Dan, gliding into step with Ed, said, “No one can catch a rattlesnake that way.”

“I never would have believed it, but she was telling the truth,” said Ed. He watched Betsy running down the street and then back to them. He took a few steps and then said, “I wonder how I’ll explain that to her mothers.”

The comment about mothers reminded Dan that he was talking to one of the Carter Clan. He tried to remember what he could about them and it took him a minute to remember that Ed was a Druid. He looked over at the cowboy walking down the street beside him, not quite believing that Ed was a Druid. He asked, “Why aren’t you wearing a robe?”

“I’m not working,” replied Ed. He didn’t like to wear his robes around town, preferring to be a regular guy in his hometown. Most of the residents of the town ignored the robe, but there were a few that treated him differently from when he was dressed in jeans. Other neighbors waved to him as they went about their business.

Dan tried to decide what he thought of Ed. The tall lanky cowboy didn’t fit his idea of a Druid. The casual attitude and friendly greetings by everyone was not what Dan had expected. He had always heard that the Carter Clan was reclusive and had little to do with other people. He asked, “So you only wear your robes when you’re working?”

“For the most part,” replied Ed as Betsy passed them. Ed reached out and picked up the little girl as he said, “You stay here with me until we get to the barbershop. I don’t want you getting run over by a car.”

“I can go faster than a car,” replied Betsy as she wriggled in his arms.

Knowing that his daughter believed that, Ed threw her on his shoulders and, in an attempt to distract her, said, “Horsey ride time.”

Dan had watched the interaction with interest, amazed that the man had that much patience with the squirming kid. Dan said, “You have a lot of patience with children.”

“Betsy is the most energetic of our kids. Beth, Little John, and William are much more scholarly. They prefer books to athletics,” replied Ed. Betsy tried to goad him into moving faster by rocking on his shoulders, but her efforts had no effect.

“Oh,” replied Dan. He looked at Betsy wondering what he would do with a child like that in his life. The issue was moot. He was a bachelor and would remain one for the rest of his life. It was not by choice, but a matter of appearance and behavior. Anytime he got around a woman his tongue stopped working. All interactions with women ended with him blushing while stammering inane conversation. He couldn’t even work with them, a fact that was a major subject of discussion at the office.

The men reached the barbershop and Dan held the door open for Ed. As Ed stepped into the shop, the two men inside said, “Howdy, Ed.”

“Howdy, Sheriff. Howdy, Doc.” Ed set Betsy down and watched as she immediately dashed around the small room to check out the interior.

Doc, the barber, went over to a candy bowl and pulled out a sucker. He turned to Betsy and, offering it to her, asked, “How are you doing, Betsy?”

“Good. Saw a bad snake, but Daddy Ed threw it away,” answered Betsy as she eyed the sucker with great interest. She went over to where Doc stood. Barely able to control her desire to move, she asked, “Is that for me?”

“Yes, it is,” replied Doc.

Her hand reached out and grabbed the sucker faster than the eye could follow. Once she had it in her hand, she said, “Thank you.”

Dan had watched her grab the sucker and, as a result, could believe that she was able to catch a snake in mid-strike. Everyone except Ed stared at her in shock. It took a second for Doc to reply, “You’re welcome.”

Ed said, “Everyone, this is our new neighbor, Dan Biggerstaff.”

Doc said, “Welcome to Doc’s Barbershop, Dan. I’m Doc. Have a seat and I’ll get you on your way.”

Dan sat down and asked, “Do you do straight razor shaves?”

“You bet,” replied Doc while he went through the procedure for giving a haircut and a shave.

Keeping an eye on Betsy, Ed took a seat next to the lawman. Turning to the Sheriff, Ed said, “I heard that you haven’t been able to catch a criminal in ages. Are we going to have to find a new Sheriff?”

The Sheriff laughed and said, “We’ve got more cops than crimes in this town. We didn’t even have a schoolyard fight so far this year.”

Betsy took a seat next to Ed to watch the barber cut Dan’s hair. Giving a wink to Betsy, Ed asked, “What are these kids coming to?”

His comment brought a round of laughter to the room. Doc went to wave his comb, but it fell out of his hand. Before it hit the floor, Betsy had moved from her seat and caught the comb. She held it up for Doc. The elderly man looked down at Betsy and said, “You sure are a fast one.”

“Momma Ling says I’m faster than her,” replied Betsy as she handed the comb over to the barber. Returning to her chair, she sighed and said, “But not as strong.”

Ed hugged her tightly, but she squirmed in response to the restriction of the hug. He released her and turned to the Sheriff. He asked, “So how are things going?”

“Well, things are quiet and that suits me perfectly fine,” answered the Sheriff. The past few years had been characterized by almost no crime in the town. The only thing that he really did that was of value was checking the stores to make sure the doors were locked at night. It was a rare occasion when he found an unlocked door, but it did break up the time.

“Our family is moving back here to stay for a while. I hope that doesn’t mean a sudden increase in criminals,” replied Ed.

As Doc trimmed the hair along the back of his neck, Dan asked, “Why would that mean an increase in criminals?”

The Sheriff answered, “There are some people that think the world would be better off without the Carters.”