Chapter 8

The mother and daughter sat on the bed in their pajamas, Kimmie brushing her mother's hair, another reversal of late. Always before it had been Lisa who would lovingly brush her daughter's hair while the two talked.

A couple of weeks had passed since Kimmie had been safely returned. Although Kimmie's physical injuries were long since healed, Lisa had observed a noticeable change come over the young girl. When Lisa had asked if Kimmie wished to stay out of school a while or even switch schools, the teen had refused, starting back to school immediately, ignoring the stares and whispers.

On the few occasions when Lisa had gotten Kimmie to talk about her ordeal, the girl's voice had taken on a detached tone, almost as if she were talking about someone else or as if the events she was describing had taken place long ago and far away.

Shortly after starting back to school, Kimmie had approached Lisa about getting a part time job. Lisa thought perhaps it might be a means of coping so she agreed. A few days later Kimmie had announced that she wished to begin doing the household bookkeeping. Lisa was amazed as Kimmie had never before shown any interest in financial matters. But when the teen insisted, the mother had relented, secretly glad to have that burden lifted from her (she would of course surreptitiously check the girl's math). She certainly had no objections when Kimmie had begun taking a martial arts self defense course two nights a week, but when Kimmie insisted on fixing the leaky sink trap instead of calling a plumber, she wondered if all this might be too much for the teen, especially after what she had just gone through.

"Kimmie, honey..."

"It's Kim now. Kimmie is a little girl's name. After what I went through I don't feel like a little girl any more."

"Of course, if that's what you wish. Kim, I'm a bit concerned."

"About?"

"About you taking on all this responsibility all of a sudden. Heaven knows I do appreciate it, but..."

"Mom, I did a lot of growing up in a very short period of time. One of the things that being Rolf's whore taught me..."

"You're not a whore Kim."

"I was. I was his whore. I was weak and he and the others preyed on me. Like they did you those years ago. I hated myself for being weak, allowing them to use me."

"But honey, nobody could have..."

"Maybe not, but it still doesn't change the way I felt about myself. Then I saw how Marianne stood up to them, even when Rolf raped her... how brave she was to give herself up to rescue me."

"She was a courageous woman Kim, one of the strongest women I've ever known."

"And loving."

"Yes, she was everything I've ever wanted. I told you what we had planned for after we got you back."

"She was the strong one."

"Yes, I needed her strength."

"And you both enjoyed her being stronger than you."

"Yes, I gave myself to her. She loved being strong for me."

"You miss her don't you?"

"Very much, but I have you back with me now and..."

"And I have you," answered Kim in a way that brought Lisa up short.

"Honey, I..."

"I know... everything."

"I don't know what you mean," replied Lisa, puzzled.

"I know it was Rolf who raped you fifteen years ago. And I know he was my father."

"NO! I mean yes, okay, he raped me but..."

Lisa had never wanted Kim to know that Rolf was the same biker who had raped her years earlier and certainly not that he was Kim's father.

"Come on Lisa, stop treating me like a child."

The use of her first name stunned the mother.

"What did you... ?"

"If we're going to live together, make this work, we have to be honest with each other... and you have to treat me like an adult, like an equal."

"But you're my daughter!... make what work?"

"When I became Rolf's whore," Kim continued, "he liked to sit around and brag about his conquests. It didn't take much prodding to get him to tell about that truck stop fifteen years ago and the beautiful woman he and his gang raped for three days. It also didn't take much to figure out that your pregnancy was the reason you and Carl split. The only reason your pregnancy could have split up the two of you was if the baby wasn't his... and whose else could it have been?"

"Kim... I... wanted... intended to tell you eventually, but I just didn't think this was the right time."

"I don't blame you Lisa." Again the sound of her first name from her daughter's lips was disconcerting. "I've never doubted that you love me, although I could certainly understand if you hated me -- the bastard child of an animal like that."