Chapter 41

Cassidy had DVRed the sweeps-week episodes of The Young and The Wild she’d missed while dealing with Knackers. Pam and Tracy had waited so the three of them could watch together. The girls worked in concert to get ready. Pam was in charge of making bowls of cheesy, extra-butter popcorn, and Tracy made sangria. While they were attending to the refreshments, Cassidy found the episodes on the DVR.

“Tracy! You saw our stupid boy today filming your sports show. Did he give you any hints about what happens?” Cassidy asked.

“I didn’t see him because his film-class assignment changed. He let me take over his vlog and hooked me up with Joey, Greg’s girlfriend. Did you know she’s the first female head trainer at USC for a men’s sport? Her goal is to someday be the head trainer for either a Power 5 or NFL football team.”

“What’s his new assignment?” Pam asked.

“He has to make a documentary on something unexpected in his life, one that communicates a life lesson that will benefit everyone,” Tracy said.

“I bet he films the little ninjas and makes a public service announcement about using condoms,” Cassidy quipped.

“He’d never expose his kids like that. While he doesn’t make a secret of them, David loves them too much to put them in the public eye,” Pam said, adding her opinion.

Cassidy wrinkled her nose.

“You’re right. I was just trying to be funny,” Cassidy admitted.

“It would make a good PSA, though. His kids could go from sweet little ninjas to terrorizing their daycare,” Tracy suggested.

The girls all found their TV-watching spots, and Cassidy hit play.

After the opening credits, Monday’s episode began with David’s character, Mick, introducing Kirsten—Bec Carson in real life—to the rest of the cast. Since the focus that day was on her, she was in almost every scene.

The last one of that day had Kirsten and Nikki, Mick’s new love interest, talking about why they’d agreed to such a crazy setup.

“His wife encourages it. She has to travel and knows his sexual appetite,” Kirsten said.

“He is a horny goat,” Nikki said.

“Nadia would rather he sleep with a couple of other girls than someone new every night.”

“I guess that makes sense. But wouldn’t you want to be exclusive if you were married?” Nikki asked.

“I am married,” Kirsten admitted.

The show ended with that.

“No!” Pam complained.

Cassidy scowled because they’d been left with a cliffhanger.

“It’s sweeps week. They want people back to watch the next episode,” Tracy explained.

“I call downstairs bathroom,” Cassidy yelled and jumped up.

They took a break between shows to clean up the popcorn and get more drinks. Pam made them all bowls of ice cream. Once everyone was settled, Cassidy started Tuesday’s offering.

“David told me this was the number one show in its time slot by Tuesday,” Tracy said.

It was aired head-to-head with all the talk shows that were shown after the local news to start late night. Talk shows had been the networks’ bread and butter for decades. Johnny Carson’s The Tonight Show had popularized the current format of late-night talk show back in the early 1960s.

“How could that happen?” Pam asked.

“David explained that part of it is that network television viewership, particularly for late-night talk shows, is way down. Just four years ago, The Tonight Show averaged 11 million viewers. Because they decided to go political, and due to the tremendous growth in popularity of streaming video, they only had 2 million watching Tuesday. I guess more than 2 million people would rather see a bunch of twenty-somethings running around half-naked,” Tracy said.

“No contest for me,” Cassidy said, making her roommates smile in agreement.

The second night added more plot twists. It revealed that Mick knew Kirsten’s husband; they’d served together in the military. Zak’s character was currently working for a mercenary company in Africa. He’d been there for the past couple of years, and Kirsten got lonely.

Tuesday’s cliffhanger was Mick’s wife’s appearance in the last scene. It was the one Adrienne staged, where David was sprawled out naked on their bed, obviously a bit winded by what they’d just done. Adrienne had laid her head on his upper thigh, her hair covering the good stuff. She was lying on her stomach, which put her magnificent derriere on full display.

“Well, that was some kind of welcome home,” Adrienne’s character, Nadia, said as she raised her head, all but revealing Mr. Happy to a worldwide audience.

The credits rolled.

“No!” the three girls cried out in unison.

“I was talking to Coach Mason, and he says he thinks you have the chops to be an offensive coordinator. In fact, he said you did some of that in high school when he was laid up. Why don’t you put on your coaching hat and tell us how we’ll beat UCLA?” Coach Merritt asked David.

David had been asked to update all the coaches on the preparation for Notre Dame. He felt blindsided by a question about this week’s opponent, one he wasn’t going to play against.

“And none of you are going to be butthurt if I tell you what I really think?” David asked, looking around the room.

Coach Stackhouse snickered, which drew the eye of her head coach.

“Amy, you have an opinion you wish to share?”

“Only that David was smart to ask the question. If you want his unvarnished opinion, I suggest you assure him you won’t hold it against him. Otherwise, this exercise is a waste of time because he’ll just tell you what you want to hear or give you a laundry list of meaningless clichés.”

“You would, wouldn’t you?” Coach Merritt asked David.

He just shrugged to give his nonanswer.

“We promise not to get butthurt,” Coach Merritt said.

“Let’s set the stage,” David said. “UCLA is 2–8, but if they beat us, that pain disappears. A ‘W’ against their biggest rival will make their fanbase forget what a dumpster fire of a season they’ve had to this point.

“For us, this is a must-win game because it gets us to that magic number 6, meaning we’re going bowling,” David said.

He looked around the room, and everyone agreed with him to this point.

“Both teams have had the same two main issues go against them this year: injuries and mental mistakes. Our roster is loaded with talented players, making the injury issues not as bad for us as they are for UCLA. Last week, mental mistakes and penalties cost us the game.

“I think we can fix the unsportsmanlike conduct by our best defensive back; Mario’s better than that. Our starting left tackle should be replaced. John Johnson can’t seem to remember the snap count or who he’s supposed to block. I realize his backup is a true freshman, but if you point Bear in the right direction, he’s a rock,” David said.

Offensive line coach Mike Bolton wore a neutral look on his face, as did Coach Thomas. David bet they’d voiced the same concerns and had been shot down. Amy caught his eye and gave him a little nod to continue.

“Matt Long stepped in after Ridge Townsend left early for the NFL. His raw numbers aren’t terrible. He’s passed for 1,545 yards on the season for an average of 220 yards per game with a 57.1 completion percentage and 11 touchdown passes. The problem is the 8 interceptions.

“Matt will continue to improve, but he gets rattled when pressed. It looks like the game suddenly speeds up for him, and he makes questionable decisions. My best advice would be to watch, and if Matt starts to get happy feet or looks lost, pull him from the game for a few plays to settle him,” David suggested.

“Won’t that make the situation worse?” Coach Thomas asked.

“Not if you bring Matt in and explain it to him. Show him how after getting knocked on his ass, three plays later, he’s throwing an interception or badly missing an open receiver. Matt understands winning plays. You’d be putting him in a position for success, and he would recognize that,” David said, then had a thought. “Call his dad. Matt goes to him for advice, and if he hears it from his dad, too, you’ll be fine.”

“I should have thought of that,” Coach Stackhouse said. “I think David’s assessment is spot on.”

Her job as team psychologist—along with being their special teams coach—meant she was responsible for knowing how to communicate with each player. David was right. She’d been told Matt depended on his father for advice; she should have been using Matt’s dad to help him become a better player.

“The overview is nice, but the bottom line is the upcoming game for us,” Coach Merritt said.

“Let’s start with line play. We’ve allowed twenty-four sacks this season, and last week against Cal, they got us for four. We gave up ten tackles for loss. On top of that, we snapped the ball before Matt was ready. Like a lot of our games, once the mistakes began, the floodgates opened. We can’t have that against an overmatched UCLA team.

“Our run game has generally been solid, and I would give UCLA a steady diet of that. Then I would play-action pass deep to Bill. If Matt’s off target, Bill’s the receiver who can go to the ball and catch it. Even if it doesn’t work, UCLA has to worry about us picking up chunk plays, which in turn forces them to play the run honestly.

“I’ll put our line up against theirs any day, especially now that we’ve had them doing sixty minutes of hell. We’re seeing significant improvement in their conditioning. I would grind out first downs and take my time between plays. Force their defense to be on the field as you throw body blows. Come the fourth quarter, they’ll be tired, and we can win the game.

“I know that isn’t the sexiest way to win, but if you have superior talent, pound them,” David said. “Which brings me to my next point. I realize you asked me to put on my offensive coordinator hat, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the defense. It was supposed to be our strength coming into the season, and we’ve done okay in pass defense. But when it comes to stopping the run, we haven’t looked like the defense everyone expected to see. We have to do better at that.”

“And what else should we worry about?” Coach Merritt asked.

“This is a rivalry game. They’ve had this date circled since day one. Their emotions will be high at the start. That’s why the long drives that end in scores are so critical. If we go three and out, their confidence will grow. If they jump out to a lead, we might be in trouble.

“Ultimately, it will come down to us controlling the game and not making mistakes. We can’t have receivers with alligator arms, and so on. We also have to keep an eye on matchups. If you see Bill one-on-one, run your run-pass option and throw him the ball. We win this game by two or more scores if we do that. If it’s close, we could easily lose,” David predicted.

Bryant Franzese caught David as he was leaving the coaches’ conference room to let him know that Dequan Bailey, the cornerback from Hutchinson Community College, was going to be visiting that weekend. Bryant had set up one of the defensive backs to be his host but wanted to let David know it was happening. Bryant suggested David talk to the young man if he had time.

UCLA was a quick bus ride, but the coaching staff wanted to treat this like any other away game. That meant staying in a hotel near UCLA’s football stadium, the iconic Rose Bowl.

Since David wasn’t starting and was a freshman, he didn’t get to pick Alex as a roommate. Instead, he drew Nick, aka Big Cat.

As they got off the buses, Pac-12 TV crews were filming to get B-roll for the next day’s game. Coach Stackhouse must have drawn the short straw because she was handing out key cards.

“Go use your charm and get us a quiet room away from the dumpster,” Big Cat said.

David got in line and waited. When it was his turn, Amy winked at him.

“Thank me later,” she said under her breath.

David took the cards and found Big Cat talking to the other freshmen.

“What did you get?”

“I didn’t look,” David said, handing the envelope to his roommate.

“We’re on the third floor,” Chuy said.

Big Cat gave David an unreadable look and said, “Grab your gear, and let’s get settled before dinner.”

David followed him to the elevators. When they got on, they were alone.

That was when Big Cat began to bounce around.

“Holy fuck! I think they gave you one of the coaches’ rooms by mistake.”

David looked at the elevator number pushed; it was the top floor. Something was up. He wouldn’t be surprised if this was some prank, so he had his guard up when they got off. Their room was one of the end suites, with two bedrooms with king-size beds.

They’d just gotten unpacked when there was a knock at the door. David let Big Cat get it.

“David! I think this is for you.”

He came out to find Drew Langford, USC’s athletic director.

“I was hoping I could have a word,” Drew said.

“I’ll let the coaches know you might be late for dinner,” Big Cat said as he left.

David went with Drew to a conference room on the first floor. When they walked in, David saw a strange assortment of guests. From the Pac-12 television network were their college game-day announcers, along with Tracy. Pac-12 Commissioner Brent Allison was talking to Channel 10 sports reporter Chip Wagner. There were USC boosters, including his grandmother, Ron Pennington, and Gabe Francis.

The one that puzzled him was Abigail Barnes, his director from the soap.

“Everyone! Go on through to the other room, and we’ll talk over dinner,” Drew called out.