Chapter 8: Maya

After that night, Mark and I drifted apart completely. I saw him at school infrequently. I was in my group, he was in his. He didn’t call me, and I certainly didn’t have the nerve to call him. So, we just drifted apart.

For the last half of the year I was crushed. I didn’t realize it at the time, but my heart was completely broken. I was in a mental haze over the winter, feeling miserable, lost, and completely out of sorts.

I think it’s important to point out that while it’s glaringly obvious now that I had developed romantic feelings for Mark, I had zero idea at the time.

I wouldn’t say I was in denial, because I was certainly aware of my feelings. If you’ve ever broken up with someone and your chest feels like it’s spontaneously arranging itself into a tangle of knots when you think of them, you know what I mean. I simply refused to acknowledge that this pain was caused by Mark’s absence.

So, I experienced all those feelings, but mentally I didn’t contextualize them with him. My refusal to allow myself to process these feelings prolonged the pain, but after a few weeks of this dead-of-winter misery I started to feel better.

I had always been athletic, played a bunch of different team sports, and really enjoyed long-distance running. However, team sports require a high level of extrovertism that I don’t possess. No, I’m a complete introvert who can be an extrovert when the situation calls for it. But given the choice, I prefer to be left alone.

As I was searching for some other physical activity, I discovered the universal weight machine at the high school. As an introvert, lifting was great because it was something that I could do with minimal interaction with other people. Soon I was there every day.

There were a handful of other guys that would use the weights regularly, including Nick. Again, we never discussed what had happened earlier in the year, but were still friends and would hang around at school. He was still dating his girlfriend Katie, and they spent every possible moment together.

After I had been lifting weights for a few months, I became aware that I was on the receiving end of an increasing amount of attention. Guys at school would ask “hey, did you start lifting weights?”

This realization was powerful, and had a great effect on me.

I began lifting religiously.

After graduation in the Spring of 1989, I worked a really awful construction labor job for the summer that I won’t mention here because it sucked and I don’t want to remember it. I used the money to move out of my parent’s house and into a small one bedroom bachelor suite.

The main room consisted of a kitchen and a small hint of a living room. The bedroom was tiny, with barely enough room to move once I had my single bed in there.

That fall, I signed up for classes at the local community college. Nick and Katie were the only ones from our group that started as well; everyone else was either working, traveling, or doing nothing.

There were obviously a lot of very attractive young women at college, and I was desperate to find my first girlfriend. I followed the age-old advice of joining a club to meet girls, and started working on the student newspaper.

The newspaper club was a fifty-fifty gender split and I ended up working a lot with a girl named Maya and her stalwart companion Sarah.

Maya was really pretty, with a dark complexion, dark brown eyes, and curly brunette hair. She was quite short, and had a great body. Over time I found out her family was from Brazil and had immigrated to Canada in the 1960’s.

Sarah, on the other hand, was a tall, nerdy, gangly girl who rarely spoke. I call her Maya’s stalwart companion because Sarah followed Maya everywhere she went, looming behind her like a Squire shadowing her Knight.

I definitely felt some romantic sparks with Maya, but they were developing slowly. Very slowly.

One on Saturday afternoon, Nick and Katie invited me to hang out at the mall. I had nothing else to do, so I tagged along.

I haven’t said much about Katie yet, but she was, and probably still is an amazing, awesome person. Just a great human being. She was hot as hell, super smart, and had a great sense of humor. It was easy to see why Nick was so completely and utterly taken with her.

On this particular day, my hormones were a raging inferno of horniness. I was surrounded by a cloud of pheromones and testosterone so strong that Katie picked up on it.

We ended up in a clothing store and Nick was rifling through the racks. A group of hot girls were trying on clothes and I couldn’t help but stare.

Katie watched me with a look of bemusement.

“Why don’t you go talk to them?”

I bristled. “No, no.”

“Do you want me to talk to them for you?”

I looked at Katie, and she was grinning fiendishly.

“Hell no.”

“Why not?”

“Well, what exactly would you say?”

“I’d tell them that my friend over there is a great guy and they should check him out.”

“Yeah, and then they’d check me out and that would be it.”

“It would not.”

“Oh, yes it would. Come on Katie. Would that work on you?”

Katie laughed. “No, I guess it wouldn’t.”

“See?”

“I was just offering my services,” she laughed.

“Well, if you’d offer me your other services that would also solve the problem.”

Katie laughed out loud and playfully hit me. Nick looked up, oblivious.

“My services, huh,” she said, sarcastically looking me up and down. “That doesn’t sound too bad actually.”

I cast a glance at Nick, fearful that he’d be pissed. But he was just smiling and shaking his head. Clearly, Katie was a flirt and Nick was used to it.

Katie took pity on me and as winter approached she set up a double date with a girl from her class.

Her name was Nancy. I was aware of her, I had seen her around campus, but she wasn’t exactly my type.

Nancy was the stereotypical high school female athlete. I learned later that she played volleyball at a very high level. She was always wearing sports clothes - Adidas shorts with leggings underneath, teeshirts with team or tournament names, a warm-up jacket.

She wasn’t feminine, and her curly brunette hair was always up in a clip on top of her head. Her jawline was stark, like a man’s, and her eyes were so brown it was hard to tell where her pupil ended and her iris started. She was the complete antithesis of “sexy”.

The “date” was at the student union on campus. The student union was an old trailer that had been dragged behind the main campus building. The college administration had done the bare minimum to make it legally habitable by humans. Inside, it had a small bar seating area where they served horrible food, and a lounge with a lot of old couches and single chairs.

Nick and I dragged a pair of couches and set them opposite each other. Then, Nick and Katie sat on one, cuddling closely, and Nancy and I sat on the other, me on one end and her on the other. Katie had a huge smile on her face, watching the situation she had engineered play out.

As the evening wore on, it got louder in the student union building and eventually Nick and Katie became engrossed in conversation. Nancy and I still sat with the wide gulf of the couch cushions between us, not talking. The awkwardness was quickly becoming unbearable.

I looked over at Nancy.

“Hey, you play volleyball right?”

Nancy stared at me, arms crossed. She nodded.

“There’s this guy, I think his name is Kent? He’s in my calculus class. I think he played volleyball. Do you know him?”

Nancy turned and stared at me with her mouth open.

“Do I know him? Do I know him? Yes, I know him, he’s a total creep!”

I recoiled.

“I went on a date with him. He wanted me to massage his legs. He said he was out running and his legs were stiff and he wanted me to massage them.”

“Ah,” I stammered. “Yeah, that’s a bit odd.”

“Geez! It’s creepy! Who asks someone they just met to massage their legs!”

Nancy was staring at me, all I could do was nod.

“Geez!”

I managed to steer the conversation around to a less controversial topic and the rest of the evening was pleasant enough. At closing time I tried to say my goodbyes and leave, but Katie wasn’t having it.

“Luc, I’m going home with Nick, can you give Nancy a ride home?”

I looked over at Nancy. She stared at me, arms crossed.

“Oh, um ... sure. Yes.”

Katie’s grin was ear to ear.

In the car on the ride home, Nancy barked directions at me.

“Geez! Go left here, don’t you know where you’re going?”

Thankfully her apartment building was close by and the trip was short. As I pulled up to the front door, I was already thanking her for a lovely evening and saying goodbye. As the car stopped, Nancy turned to me and stared.

“Geez, we’re on a date. Aren’t you going to ask to come inside?”

“Oh no,” I thought.

I pulled the car into the visitor’s lot beside the building and we went inside. In the elevator, Nancy silently stared straight ahead with her arms crossed.

Her apartment was a student bachelor’s suite, just like mine. There was a small table with chairs in the kitchen area and a small sofa in the living space. Nancy took off her jacket, and put it on a hook. I took off mine and she hastily took it and put on the next hook.

“Go sit down. Do you want a drink?”

“No, thanks. I’m okay.”

Nancy sat next to me and handed me a glass of water.

“Geez, have a drink.”

I pushed myself as far as possible to the end of the sofa, took a small sip to be polite, and placed the glass on the coffee table. Nancy sat at the other end and stared.

“Why are you all the way over there?”

I looked around, hoping the wall would collapse and I’d fall out of the building.

“Oh, I’m just leaning against the back of the couch so I can look at you while we’re talking.”

“Well, come closer, geez!”

I shuffled over a few inches, and Nancy slid over until she was right beside me. She turned towards me and rested an arm on top of the sofa, now staring at the side of my head. I turned to face her.

As our eyes met, I noticed something in my lower peripheral vision.

Boobs. Wonderful, full, round boobs. Nancy was wearing a white teeshirt and the fabric was absolutely straining under the heft of her tits. My cock, in an ultimate act of betrayal, began to twitch and harden.

I fought the urge to look down, and kept my gaze at eye level.

“Well geez, are you going to kiss me or not?”

I tried not to let the shock register on my face.

“I didn’t know you wanted to,” I stammered.

“Well, of course! A boy and a girl alone on the couch, what else are we going to do? Isn’t it obvious?”

“No”, I thought. “It’s not obvious.”

I tentatively leaned over and gave Nancy a little peck on the lips. She watched me the whole time, not moving.

“Geez, you call that a kiss?”

That was it. That comment was the one that pushed me over the edge. She didn’t like that kiss? Okay. I’ll kiss her.

I leaned over, grabbed Nancy by the waist and sunk my lips deeply against hers. She immediately responded by kissing me back with full, wet lips. I slid my tongue into her mouth and felt her tongue slide against mine.

Now that I was in close, the fruity scent of Nancy’s lip balm mixed with some faint, flowery scent that I assumed was perfume. She was actually a really good kisser and I thought I may as well enjoy it while it lasted.

“Wow, aggressive,” I thought as Nancy leaned into me, trying to push me back against the couch. I slid two hands around to her back and she pushed forward again, sliding into my lap.

My cock had completed its betrayal and was now rock hard. But then I had a realization.

“Great,” I thought. “She’s going to feel it, freak out, and I can get the fuck out of here.”

Nancy slid forward further and I felt her crotch inching closer. I turned so my back was against the sofa, and Nancy repositioned herself on top of me, legs spread, fully straddling me. She put her arms behind my neck and we resumed kissing.

“Any second now...” I thought.

Then, Nancy’s crotch met mine. As we kissed, I felt her tentatively rub her crotch against my cock. I stopped kissing, and Nancy pulled back. She looked down and I accepted my fate as the next victim to be creep-shamed tomorrow when she told the story to all her friends.

But then, Nancy ground her pussy against my cock. She learned forward.

“That feels good,” she whispered.

I froze as Nancy leaned back and pulled off her shirt, revealing a very nice set of tits under a lacy white bra. My hands betrayed me next and rose up, squeezing those glorious boobs through the fabric.

Nancy leaned back and I could see now that she had six pack abs. She also wasn’t curvy, her sides dropped straight down to her hips, like a guy.

She moaned and resumed grinding her pussy against my cock. I continued squeezing her tits, amazed at their firmness.

“Well, aren’t you going to take my bra off?”

I hastily reached around the back, and found nothing.

“Geez, the hook is in front!”

I pulled my hands back and fumbled with the hook. It popped open and Nancy’s boobs sprang out. And they were nice. So nice. Round, firm, small areolas, little round nipples, rock hard.

I reached up and got back to squeezing, rubbing my thumb over her nipples. She leaned and kissed me deeply, then whispered in my ear.

“Want to go to the bedroom?”

So, yes, here was my opportunity to fuck a girl for the first time. An opportunity that I had literally been waiting for, yearning for, dying for. But I really was conflicted.

I was just not that attracted to Nancy. Yes, my cock was hard and yes she was a great kisser, but I couldn’t get the thought that she was trouble out of my mind.

My main concern was that Nancy clearly had a little crazy streak. She was all over the place. Who knows what she would do afterwards, would she expect me to date her? I certainly didn’t want that.

My secondary concern was that she would shit talk me to the female population at college just as she had done with the guy from calculus class. My current non-existent reputation would immediately go from zero to minus infinity, instantly. If I thought I was sexless now, wait until Nancy was finished with me.

Unfortunately, this was the conscious, rational, critical thinking part of my brain. The lizard part of my brain was screaming FUCK HER. FUCK HER NOW. DO NOT WAIT.

Nancy’s bedroom had a small lamp casting a faint light across the whole room. As I followed her, she undid her pants, and I pulled my shirt off. She pulled her pants down and kicked them off at the edge of the bed, then crawled on top.

She was wearing some boring white cotton panties, and as she crawled on all fours to the head of the bed I could see that they were soaked. She flopped over onto her back, and looked at me.

“Well, what are you waiting for?”

“Ugh,” I thought, and undid my pants, dropping them to the floor. I pulled off my underwear and stepped out of them as I crawled on to the bed.

For the first time, most likely ever, I saw Nancy smile. It wasn’t a huge smile, more of a slight upward movement at each corner or her mouth.

The thing that I was most amped for was eating pussy. I considered my blowjob technique to be above average and now I was ready to begin my career as a pleaser of women as well.

I crawled up the bed to Nancy, then reached down and grabbed the waistband of her panties. She arched her hips, I slipped them down, then off. I spread her legs.

Nancy’s mound occupied the whole of the space from thigh to thigh. Her pubes were brunette, and thick.

This was before the era of neatly trimmed bushes, and she certainly had not engaged in any of that. It was wild and unkempt. I thought back to Veronica’s tiny blonde bush and this was completely different territory.

No matter, though. Here I was.

Nancy propped herself up on her elbows as I put my face between her legs.

“Wow, are you going to eat my pussy?”

“Ugh,” I thought. I got in a good position, spread her legs more, and got my tongue good and wet. I slid it up and across her labia, finishing by kissing her hood.

Nancy’s hands slammed down on the bed.

“Holy SHIT.”

I popped my head up.

“Are you okay?”

“Keep going.”

I went back down and explored all of her pussy. I licked along each side of her labia, slipped them in my mouth, sucked them gently. I flexed my tongue to a point and slipped it inside, then I put a thumb on her hood and exposed her clit.

I assumed that the clitoris was similar to the little bundle of nerves just under the glans on a cock, so I did the same thing I’d do there: I started flicking my tongue over it.

Nancy’s hands slammed down on the bed again.

One of the things that Mark loved was when I’d flatten my tongue and slide it around his glans, and since Nancy was responding so well to my other technique, I decided to give it a try.

Nancy’s hands clamped down on the top of my head as I pulsed my tongue over her clit. Every inhale was through clenched teeth, and a long, low moan accompanied every exhale.

“Stick your finger in me,” she whispered.

I slipped my index finger in, and was amazed at how absolutely soaking wet she was. I started fucking her with my finger as I quickened the pace with my tongue. Nancy grabbed the bed sheet and bunched it up in her hand, her back arching. Then, suddenly she collapsed.

I looked up, confused. Nancy flopped her arms and legs out, spread-eagled. I got up on my knees and crawled up to look at her face, she was gasping for air.

“Do you have a condom?”

Condom, shit! I didn’t have a fucking condom! I was so completely sure that this eventuality was impossible that the thought to bring protection had never crossed my mind.

As I was desperately trying to figure out how to conjure one up, Nancy sat up, wrapped her fingers around my cock, and slipped me into her mouth. Compared to Mark or Nick, Nancy’s mouth was soft, yielding. Her tongue was small, and I could feel her stroking the underside of my shaft with it.