Chapter 19: A Wild Megan Appears

I have always been a deeply insecure person. A lot of this is rooted in my personal history, and despite what’s written here it’s dominated by epic periods of loneliness, feelings of inadequacy, and just generally feeling lost.

I’m not going to bore you with the details or an in-depth personal psychological evaluation, but the reason it’s important here is that guilt was, and is, a driving factor in a lot of my behavior.

The short synopsis here is that my complete lack of self-esteem led me to believe that I was unworthy of love, human contact, friends, all that. And deep down I felt that if I wasn’t the best lover, human, or friend that I could be, my lover, fellow humans, or friends were not seeing “the real me” and therefore did not accept me for who I truly was but for who I was presenting myself to be.

The most apt analogy is that if I thought if I were not the most perfect version of myself, I was a poisoned version of myself. And if any love, human relationships, or friendships should be born of that poisoned version, the resulting fruit was also poisoned. That is, any relationship that was not based on “the real me” was therefore the fruit of a poisoned seed.

Therefore, the mental conclusion that I drew from this is that if I weren’t presenting the “real” me to another, any love or friendship that they returned to me wasn’t “real” because it was based on a lie.

This made it very important to me to be not only externally consistent in my words and actions, but also to be internally consistent. Because my view was based on my internal framework, I couldn’t just go along in life in happy denial. At the end of the day, I knew, myself, that I had poisoned things and it was my fault that the other person’s actions and feelings weren’t “true”.

Yeah, it’s a convoluted, fucked up way of thinking. Life is of course not that simple. Humans are complicated and messy, one can’t expect to always be one hundred percent perfect in every interaction.

The reason it’s important now, at this particular juncture, is because despite our extremely lackluster sex life I really liked Aly. She was kind, warm, and calm. She had a great sense of humor and was actually really easy to talk to. She was really intelligent and ambitious.

She and Brandon were close, as twins. But they didn’t hang around together much, they didn’t have the same set of friends, and they seemed to give each other a lot of space.

After that morning with Brandon, I was completely consumed with guilt. I couldn’t imagine how revulsed Aly would be if she ever discovered what had transpired between Brandon and me.

But it had happened, and I couldn’t change it. And now that I had this terrible secret, the poison had seeped into the kernel of the germinating relationship I had with Aly. There were only three ways forward, so I thought: either confess this to her, break it off, or keep dating her and just deal with the guilt.

I ruled out confessing it to her. I had no idea how this would affect her relationship with Brandon and I certainly wasn’t going to be responsible for destroying it. I mean, I didn’t even know if Aly was aware that Brandon was gay.

Breaking it off was also an unpalatable option because I really did like her and I felt that she really liked me. I really felt that there was a spark between us, again despite the distinct lack of a spark in the bedroom. Aly was the first girl that had invested herself in me. She was treating this relationship with just as much care and attention as I was, and no one had ever really done that for me in the past. I didn’t want to lose that.

Of course, keeping the relationship going and dealing with the guilt was the only real option here. I began the process of rationalizing everything that happened with Brandon:

It was a one-time thing that just happened.

I wasn’t looking for it, I didn’t even know Brandon was into guys.

Brandon is super hot, and I am weak. I couldn’t resist.

Deep down, I am just a greedy and opportunistic person. I am too shallow to say “no” when sex falls in my lap because it has happened so rarely in my life I don’t want to miss out when it does.

So, for the next few weeks I kept everything “normal” with Aly, with the exception that I purposely avoided having sex with her. I was fine going out on dates and even making out, but if we were to get intimate I doubted that I could even get it up. I just couldn’t get the thought that my cock had been in her brother and how she’d feel if she found out. I couldn’t do that to her.

I tried to keep things normal with Brandon at the same time. Up until this I had really only seen him at the gym, but now when I saw him there he spent all his time talking to me, hanging around me, asking me to hang out or spend time with him. He dropped hints, subtle reminders of his offer to let me use him however I wanted.

This hint-dropping escalated to the point he was doing it in front of other people and I had to pull him aside and tell him to knock it off or else people would find out. He was embarrassed, of course, and it did subside for a while. But soon enough he would find moments to get me alone and ask to see me.

All I could do was hold him off.

But it was difficult. I am an extraordinarily horny guy. As you can see if you’ve read this far, I always have a huge sexual appetite. Brandon’s sexual energy not only matched, but appeared to exceed my own. And he was hot. So incredibly hot.

As the weeks progressed and I once again went sexless, I became desperately horny. And the knowledge that incredible sex with a super hot guy was available with just a word was excruciating.

All of this had transpired in the first month and a half of the semester, and it was now the middle of October, time for midterms. Thankfully everyone had to buckle down and study so that meant both Aly and Brandon were also preoccupied in the week leading to exams.

Kyle was still working his construction job, and he worked quite long hours so he was gone early in the morning and typically didn’t come home until later at night. During weekdays I had the basement suite completely to myself so I was able to completely focus on my coursework and studies. School was a nice distraction.

One morning in the week before exams, I was studying at the kitchen table when I heard a knock at the door. It was actually rare for anyone to knock on our door because it was hidden in the carport and you had to know it was there. So, a knock on the door was a cause for surprise, or concern.

The kitchen was on the other side of the suite from that door and as I walked down the long hallway to the living room, I looked through the front window to see if there was a car there. Outside, it was a gloomy, rainy day typical of the fall in the Pacific Northwest.

As I approached the door, there was another gentle knock.

“Hang on, I’m almost there.”

I turned the knob and opened the door and there, smiling, was Megan. To be honest, despite our afternoon together at the end of the summer I hadn’t given Megan much though since then. She had disappeared, and I didn’t have any way to get in contact with her. There was no way for me to see her socially, and I certainly wasn’t going to ever ask Kyle about her.

This was a bit of a shock, and it was clearly written on my face.

“Can I come in?”

“Oh crap, I’m doing it again, I’m so sorry. Yes, please come in.”

Megan looked very cute, as usual, wearing a puffy jacket with a fake fur liner around the collar. She was wearing jeans and a pair of stylish sneakers that she kicked off at the door.

She still had that awful mullet, though it wasn’t as pronounced with the puffy collar of her jacket. She unzipped it and handed it to me, and I draped it over the back of the leather chair in the living room since we didn’t have a coat hook of any sort.

Megan’s top was a tight knitted sweater, pink, a retro 1950’s style. It clung to her perky little tits and did a wonderful job highlighting that narrow waist and just right hips.

“Wow, you look amazing.”

“Thanks! You’re not so bad yourself!”

I was suddenly aware that I was dressed like a total bum. Sweat pants, old and worn cotton shirt. I was in full-on study mode and not particularly concerned about my appearance.

“Yeah, right, thanks,” I laughed. “I was studying, I wasn’t expecting any company.”

“Oh right, it’s exam time huh? I don’t miss that!”

It was still morning and Megan accepted my offer of a cup of coffee. She followed me to the kitchen and watched as I brewed a fresh pot.

“So,” I said, scooping coffee grounds into the filter. “You were just in the neighborhood?”

Megan’s eyes twinkled.

“A little birdie told me someone has a girlfriend.”

I paused and cast a glance at her. She now had a huge grin on her face.

“Uh, yeah. I guess Kyle told you?”

She nodded.

I continued with the coffee making process, and went to the sink to fill the pot with water. I felt Megan’s eyes burning a hole in my back.

“So what’s she like?”

When the pot was full I turned and smiled back.

“She’s very nice, yeah. Tall.”

“What’s her name?”

“Aly.”

“Aly?”

“That’s right.”

“Is that short for something?”

“Yes, it’s short for ‘Alexandra’.”

“Alexandra, well, very posh. Is she posh?”

Once I’d poured the water in the reservoir, put the pot on the burner, and pressed the power switch I sat down at the table on the opposite corner from Megan.

“Posh? Well, she’s ... reserved ... I guess?”

“Reserved, huh.”

“Yeah.”

Megan grinned at me.

Now that there was a little pause in the action, the gears in my brain spun up. Megan was ostensibly here for a visit. Did she want to fuck? What was I going to do if she wanted to fuck? I was half-hoping that she did want to fuck because I absolutely wanted to fuck her and half-hoping that she didn’t so I wouldn’t have to make the decision.

“How’s your boyfriend,” I asked, hoping to head the whole situation off at the pass.

“Good,” she replied, still grinning.

“Talkative as ever, I’m sure?”

“Mmm hmm.”

The coffee maker gurgled and hissed. It was the early 90’s, so the coffee itself was pre-ground out of a can. But it smelled nice and though I became a coffee snob later in life, at this point I didn’t know any better.

“You have the day off work then?”

“Yep,” she replied. “They’re moving offices today, so everyone got a free day off.”

“Nice. So any other plans for your bonus day?”

“Nope. I’m just messing around.”

The coffee maker gasped its last breath and I poured two cups. I take mine black, and to my surprise Megan did as well. I blew on the rim and took a sip, and Megan lifted the cup with both hands to do the same, her eyes sparking through the little whaft of steam.

“So,” she said finally, placing the cup on the table and wrapping her hands around it. “Tell me more about your girlfriend.”

“Ah, well, what would you like to know?”

“Like, what does she look like. Is she pretty?”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, she is.”

“Hmmm. How’d you meet?”

“I joined the volleyball club at the university, she’s on one of the girl’s teams.”

“She’s athletic then.”

“Yep, very.”

I took another sip.

“How long have you been dating?”

“About a month, I think.”

Megan lifted the cup with both hands again, and took a little sip.

“How’s your sex life?”

A little snorting laugh involuntarily escaped through my nostrils as I pursed my lips.

“It’s okay,” I replied with a nod.

“Just okay.”

“Right.”

“Mmm hmm, I see.”

I kept my lips pursed as she continued grinning at me.

“Um, is there something else you want to ask me?”

She shifted in her seat and sat on hands. She straightened her back, pushing her chest out. The outline of her hot little breasts took shape under the tight pink knit of her top. I tried not to let my eyes drift down.

“Nope, just wanted to hear how it’s going for you.”

“Well, it’s going great.”

Of course it wasn’t going great, but I wasn’t about to say anything.

“The same little birdie told me your girlfriend hasn’t been over for a while and thought maybe you broke up or something.”

What the fuck, I thought. I am going to fucking kill Kyle.

“No, we didn’t break up.”

“Mmm hmmm,” she nodded. “I just thought that someone with your libido would want to see your girlfriend as much as possible.”

I cast a wary glance at Megan, but her little smirk didn’t budge. At this point I had no idea what the hell she was up to, but it’s clear that she was just messing with me. I decided to call her on it.

“So there is something you wanted to ask me after all huh?”

She giggled and slipped her hands out from where she was sitting on them.

“I’m bored, okay. You got me. When you get to your thirties, all your friends want to talk about interior design and mortgage rates. You’re the only person I’ve met in the past five years with a remotely interesting life.”

“I would hardly describe my life as interesting, but okay.”

She leaned forward, excitedly. She was positively beaming, and she tapped her palms lightly on the table in anticipation.

“Details, give me the details.”

I sighed.

“She’s bad in bed.”

Megan’s eyes widened in shock.

“What? Oh no, what do you mean?”

“I shouldn’t say bad, I just mean that she just likes sex one way, the same way, every time.”

“One way?”

I couldn’t believe I was discussing this with her. I had been keeping this to myself for weeks, it was bizarre to talk about.

“She just likes to fuck in the missionary position, that’s it. Nothing else.”

Megan’s mouth dropped open.

“Like, nothing else? No oral sex, no nothing?”

I shook my head.

“Oh, poor you,” she said, laughing. “And what a waste of your talents!”

I shot her a look, and she put a hand to her mouth.

“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.”

There was a long pause as we sipped our coffee.

“Well,” she finally piped up, “have you talked to her about it?”

“Yeah, of course. She just isn’t into oral, or different positions, she just likes it simple.”

“Does she cum?”

I bolted upright at this question. Aly and I had never once discussed her having an orgasm.

“You know, that’s a good question.”

“You don’t know?”

I was suddenly embarrassed. I could feel the heat rising from the back of my neck, over my ears, my face becoming flush.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

I suddenly felt super uncomfortable. Megan’s wide grin was now just a little smirk.

“It’s fine, I mean, it’s...” I replied, trailing off.

“So is that why you haven’t had her over lately?”

“Oh no,” I replied without thinking, “that’s because...”

My brain immediately pumped the brakes on what my mouth was about to let go. I stared at Megan, mouth agape.

“What? Why?” she asked.

Megan’s grin returned. Her mouth dropped open again.

“You’re fucking someone else on the side, aren’t you?”

I just shook my head, little sounds emerging from my mouth in place of actual words.

“You are!” She slammed both hands on the table. “Who? Who? Tell me who!”

She leaned forward excitedly.

“Oh man,” I said, slumping back in my seat. “I can’t believe I’m going to tell you this.”

Megan sat on her hands and excitedly bumped up and down on her seat.

“Tell me what? Tell me!”

I sighed, and leaned forward.

“This is just between us. Promise me you’ll keep this to yourself. Most importantly - do not, under any circumstances, ever say anything to Kyle.”

“Oh my god, this is getting exciting.”

She put a finger to her mouth, zipped her lips shut, turned the key, then threw it away.

I inhaled deeply and leaned back.

“Her brother.”

“Huh,” said Megan. She cocked an eyebrow in confusion. “What about her brother?”

I shot her the “seriously?” look. The confusion lasted for another second, then she put a hand to her mouth and gasped.

“You’re fucking her brother!”

She put her other hand up to her mouth.

“Oh my god!”

I motioned with my hands for her to calm.

“Once, just once.”

“Once!”

I slumped back in my chair, and Megan’s hands dropped from her face. A huge grin was plastered on her face.

“I mean, I knew you were kinky obviously, but ... oh my god!”

I suddenly regretted saying anything. I tilted my head back and looked to the ceiling, hoping the floor would collapse and I’d fall into some bottomless, gaping maw.

I looked back to Megan, still grinning and giggling.

“How’d that happen?”

“It just happened.”

“He knows you’re dating his sister, right?”

“Yes.”

“And he doesn’t mind?”

“Apparently not.”

I could see the gears turning.

“Well, how was it with him?”

I sighed again. My head dropped in resignation.

“Amazing. Absolutely incredible.”

“Realllllly,” laughed Megan. “Oh my god, I can’t believe this.”

She sat on her hands and resumed bouncing around excitedly. Despite the distraction of my discomfort, my eyes lifted slightly to watch her hot little boobs jiggle.

“Details,” she laughed. “I want details.”

“He’s really hot, okay. Super hot.”

“Reallllly. Is he just into guys?”

I nodded.

“Reallllllly...”

“You’re enjoying this way too much.”

“I am,” she laughed. “This is the most incredible thing I’ve heard in years. Continue.”

“We just ended up here one morning, and one thing led to another.”

“Okay, start at one thing and keep going until you get to another.”

She really wasn’t going to let this go. I spent the next twenty minutes telling her about the whole thing: we were out for a run, we ended up here, he asked me if I was into guys, I said yes, against my better judgment I decided to fuck him, we went in the shower and he gave me the best blowjob I’ve ever had, I gave him his first blowjob, then we went to the bedroom where I fucking pounded him, I found out he had never fucked anyone before so I got him to fuck me.

Megan listened to the whole thing, excitedly interjecting with specific questions. Did you kiss? How big is his cock? He took your whole cock in his ass?

When the tale was finished, she slumped back against her chair.

“I need a cigarette after that.”

“Great,” I sighed. “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

She put a hand between her legs, and looked up at me.

“My panties are fucking soaked.”

I’m not going to lie, telling her about me and Brandon had me going, and her excitement while listening had me horny as fuck. My cock had stirred to life it overruled any thoughts of guilt, shame, or anything in that moment that wasn’t directly related to fucking Megan.

My bedroom door was adjacent to the kitchen. Megan put a hand on my chest as she walked past, and I turned to watch as she stopped in my bedroom doorway.

Off came her little pink sweater, revealing a little lacy bra underneath. In one one motion she reached around and popped the clasp, let the loops fall down her arms, and dropped it to the floor.

“Get over here.”

I don’t know what else to say about Megan other than she was a walking contradiction. If you looked at her from the neck up, you’d assume that she was just your normal, average office lady in her early 30’s.

She didn’t wear much makeup, didn’t appear to be all that concerned about her hairstyle, and her only jewelry was a pair of tiny diamond stud earrings, a single one through each earlobe.

Her eyes started a gray-blue near the pupil and were a deep, rich brown at the outer edge of her iris. Her eyelashes were long and full, while her eyebrows were delicate and sparse. They arched up slightly while relaxed giving her a slightly mischievous look.

Her lips were thin and slightly pale, and her mouth was just ever so slightly too wide for her face– and given that she was so tiny it threw her face a little bit out of proportion. She was hot, no doubt. But hot in a slightly strange way, if that makes any sense.

The real contradiction was her body. From the neck down, her body was nothing short of incredible. She was only about five feet tall and there was no way she weighed more than a hundred pounds.

She was a very tight little package.

I had no idea if she worked out, but if she didn’t she had amazing genetics. A-cup boobs, but full and round despite their size. They had a pleasing jiggle, not like some A-cup boobs I would experience later in life. Her torso was proportionally long for her body, and very taut, her abs subtly but distinctly defined.

Her hips were wide for her body, and her ass was full and shapely with firm round cheeks. She had the slightest little thigh gap that was extremely inviting from any angle.

I met her at the doorway, and she pulled up on my shirt. As I took it off, she grabbed the waistband of my track pants and tugged them down.

She wrapped her fingers around my shaft and slipped her warm, wet mouth over my head. I reached down and cupped her hot little tits in my hands, massaging them as she blew me.

Her mouth was amazing, and while I was concerned about her technique on her first visit this was nothing short of expert level. Her little tongue was swirling around my cock as she tightened and loosened her lips around my shaft. She was too tiny to get me all the way in, but she didn’t hesitate to relax her throat and get me all the way to the back.

I was enjoying it a little too much, and decided I’d better slow things down a little before things came to an abrupt and messy conclusion.

I gently put my hands on her shoulder and pushed slightly to let her know, and she slipped her lips off me with a satisfying sloppy ‘pop’.

I sat on the edge of the bed, and she leaned forward to press her hot little body against me. I popped the button on her jeans, opened the front, then looped my thumbs into her panties and pulled the whole thing down over her hips. She wriggled until they dropped before kicking them off.

She looked down, spread her lips apart and rubbed her slick pussy.

“Look,” she said, showing me her wet fingers, “look how fucking wet my pussy is.”

She wiped her hand on my face.

“You did this.”

I laughed as she pushed me back on the bed and straddled me, getting her hips in position. She reached under, grabbed my shaft, and leaned back as she guided me into her slick, hot pussy. Her hands pressed on my chest as she lowered herself down my shaft, exhaling deeply.

“I have missed this cock...”

I looked down as she started rocking, her tiny lips gripping my shaft. I grabbed her ass and pulled her cheeks apart as she rode me, her hair whipping back and forth.

I teased my fingers over her asshole as she leaned down and sloppily kissed me, her tongue eagerly slipping into my mouth. Then she leaned back, putting a leg out so she could get better leverage.

I put my hands on her supple hips as she used her new position to forcefully pound my cock. Her hot little tits jiggled with every thrust and I couldn’t resist moving my hands up to squeeze and tease her nipples.

This was an amazing position as I could really feel the tension of her labia on the shaft of my cock, up and down. Up and down.

She put her hands on my chest, squeezing my flesh as she bore down. My breathing hastened and I felt the first fleeting strains of orgasm deep inside me.

“Oh no you don’t,” she giggled as slipped off my cock. It slapped against my abdomen with a wet thwack.

She turned around and threw a leg over my chest, backing up until her soaking wet pussy was directly in my face. I felt her mouth wrap around my cock, and her hair fluttered with every movement as she aggressively sucked my cock.

I took a long, lucious lick all the way up her slick labia, flexing my tongue into a point to probe her tight little asshole. Then I flattened it and slid it all the way back down, loving her slightly sweet, musky taste.

I placed my hand on her ass and pulled down her hood with my thumb, but she flinched as my tongue grazed her hard little jewel-like clit. Sensing that she was still a little too sensitive for direct stimulation, I let her hood slide back over and flattened my tongue. Then I used short licks over the opening of her hood, letting my tongue just graze the tiny bit of clit poking out.

I went back to the long, sumptuous lick up over her labia and back down, then pulled her hood back with my thumb once again and gave a little flick with my tongue.

This time, she pushed back a little, her hips gyrating slightly.

I started pulsing my tongue over her clit more quickly, with light, fluttering licks. I was very focused on her orgasm, and I hadn’t been paying much attention to my own.

But I was suddenly very aware of her lips, tight around my shaft, more assertively now. Her tiny hand gripped the base of my shaft, stroking up to meet her mouth. It felt incredible.

Her juices trickled down my chin, dripping onto my neck and chest. Her back arched as I quickened the pace of my tongue on her clit and I reached my other hand up to put a thumb on her asshole. She was close, her asshole was twitching and pulsing with each lick.

She moaned through her nose, her hair flipping higher as she held my shaft and sucked in long, firm strokes. I could clearly feel the pressure of her mouth cinching down around my cock. It was exquisite.

Just as I felt I couldn’t get my tongue sliding over her clit any faster, her hips gyrated more forcefully now, and her asshole pulsed with contractions under my thumb. She moaned loudly through her nose, and her mouth paused on my cock as she came.

I was too far gone, and I moved my hand up to tap her on the shoulder to warn her.

“Megan,” I groaned, “I’m cumming.”

I felt her pop me out of her mouth, and she aggressively jerked me as I felt a very forceful contraction drive a huge load of cum out of my urethra. My glans swelled with each shot, and I soon felt the familiar warm, sticky warmth on my abdomen.

As I panted, Megan pushed her hips forward, pussy dripping onto my chest. Her head tilted back a bit as she gasped for air, then forward as she caught her breath.

Our eyes met as she threw me a look over her shoulder, and I could not help but smirk as I saw that my cum was all around her mouth in a white, sticky ring around her lips, dripping down her chin.

“You think that’s funny, huh,” she said, throwing her legs over my torso to turn around.

She pressed her lips against mine and thrust her tongue in my mouth. She purposely smooshed her mouth against mine, pushing her lips out to smear my cum on me.

“There you go,” she giggled. “You like that?”

“I do, actually.”

“You’re the only guy I’ve met that does, weird.”

I reached down to her pussy, still soaking wet. I rubbed my fingertips on it to get them good and wet, brought it up to her lips, and she looked down briefly at them before opening her mouth and slipping them in.

“Same idea,” I replied.

She flattened her tongue and pressed my fingers against it as she slid it out. “Guess we’re just weird people huh.”

“Apparently.”

My shirt was sitting on the edge of the bed, so I handed it to her. I watched with amusement as she dabbed the last bits of cum from around her mouth.

“Did I get it all?”

“No, come here.”

She leaned in and I licked my thumb to wipe a persistent little glob of white jizz from the corner of her mouth.

“There you go.”

“Gee thanks.”

She collapsed on my chest, then folded her arms and dropped her head on them. I felt her slight body relax on top of me, but she was so light that I could still breathe with no trouble. I brushed aside her hair and gently placed my hand on the back of her neck, and another on her tiny waist.

We laid quietly for five minutes or so, then she propped her chin up on her hands to look me in the eyes.

“What’s it like to fuck a guy?”

“Hot.”

“Obviously, but like, it’s different than fucking a girl right?”

“Ah,” I replied. “You mean actually fucking a guy in the ass.”

“What did you think I meant?”

“I thought you just meant in general.”

“No.”

“Hmmm,” I paused, giving this some thought because I hadn’t really given this a lot of thought previously. “Well, you’re right it’s not like fucking a girl, at all.”

“Like, how?”

“Well, if the guy is laying on his back, you can feel his balls on your shaft as you’re thrusting. You have to be careful you don’t smash them. And if he’s on all fours in front of you, you can feel your balls slapping against his. It’s amazing.”