Chapter 78: Help Wanted

HELP WANTED: HOUSEKEEPER AND COOK. Large, unique, and diverse professional family seeks housekeeper and cook in order to focus the things that are more important to each member. Live-in possible. Salary and benefits generous. Contact Dave at 951-XXX-XXXX.

Elsa Dahlvig sat primly in my living room for her interview. She was the fifth of five people that applied for the job of housekeeper and cook. Elsa appeared to be about forty, single mother, and very Swedish. She’d explained that her parents migrated to America when she was six years old, and so she bridged the two cultures.

“Tell me your experience, Elsa.” I was trying to be cordial. Elsa was a Swedish knockout. Why she wasn’t a movie star mystified me. I would give her the job on looks alone, but I knew there had to be a more reasonable rationale, otherwise I’d get a ration of shit from everyone else whose burden she was supposed to lighten.

Elsa spoke carefully, “I did not attend a full college. I took a two-year abbreviated program in the hospitality industry. I worked for a now defunct and very exclusive club on Longboat Key called The Colony. After several years, I actually ran the housekeeping operation and the two restaurants. That also meant, that I had to fill in when we were short staff in either of those activities for our guests or the full-time patrons. I have done everything I can think of in terms of housekeeping, and that was to rigorous standards of cleanliness and crispness.

“In terms of cooking, I have done nutritional menu planning, bulk ordering of food products, cooking, serving, and everything else you could think of. Again, the standards were exceptionally high. Our clientele was used to four- and five-star accommodations and dining wherever they traveled, so that was our baseline. We always tried to go a step or two beyond that boundary.”

I said, “References?”

Elsa bent to her portfolio case and passed me a folder. “There are ten letters of reference in there. Each one has the contact information, so that you can confirm they are legitimate. You may even know one or two of them, since they are important members of the Sarasota arts community. None of them are shills. You should know that I am intensely honest.”

I took a deep breath. “Elsa, I want to offer you the job. Your qualifications and experience are far superior to any of the other applicants. However, before we talk the details of our offer, I would like to tell you a little more about the three adjacent homes where you will be working and the people in them or that are part of our intentional family.”

Elsa smiled, “Please go ahead.”

“We are a diverse group of professionals in the three homes. You saw a list of some of the professions on that one-page job description sheet that I emailed to you. There are between ten and twenty people that are part of our core group, and that includes one infant that is my son with one of my fiancées. He does have a nanny.

Elsa looked puzzled and gestured for me to elaborate.

“I have two wives and two fiancées. Beyond that my sister-in-law lives next door, and she is also my step-mother-in-law. My dad lives next door. He’s one of the principals in a large investment service. The house on the other side of this one contains an entrepreneur, and usually two flight attendants – one for an airline and one for a corporate plane.

“I don’t know how to say this next part gracefully, so I will just state what you’d find out soon enough. We are all intimate with each other. Well, not so much the men with the other men, but a lot of sharing of ourselves with each other goes on. We are quite libertine, but very loving. Further, there is a larger group of people that visit with us frequently that are similarly inclined.

“In connection with your job, you would likely brush against some of the visible elements of our sharing and libertine philosophy, that includes seeing a fair amount of nudity and possibly even couples making love. We often dine together and then associate with each other before or after our meals.

“I emphasize that there is no expectation that you participate in any manner in anything that we do with any of us. I also want to say that no one has ever had this job before and that you have the ability to shape and mold this job to whatever you want it to be.”

I held my breath, fully expecting Elsa to stand and walk out of the house without another word.

Elsa thought and said, “I’d like to see each complete house, please.” I felt that she was also contemplating the ramifications of what I’d just told her about our group’s sexuality.

I gave Elsa a complete house tour, knocking on the closed doors before otherwise allowing a brief view in a room. Heather was home studying. She was naked with a fan blowing on her as she stood at a wall chart showing all the interior muscles and sinew of a human body. This was more of her advanced anatomy class. She greeted Elsa without any concern at all about her lack of clothing.

Elsa about fell all over herself as I explained about the immense bed in my master bedroom. I pointed out that sometimes as many as seven people slept or made love there.

Elsa asked, “In front of the others?”

“Oh, yes,” I replied. “We derive arousal from watching each other.”

The shower with the ottoman also caught her eye. It was obvious what that was intended for.

I walked Elsa next door, and showed her Ross’s home. Kim was working outside, seemingly on two telephone calls at once, plus on Zoom call on her computer in which she’d shut off the video from her side. Kim was topless, and was obviously lathered up in suntan lotion. She was as ‘hot’ and attractive as the day I met her. We didn’t interrupt her, but I explained who she was.

After the tour of Ross’s home, we went back through my yard and into the freshly renovated house that Tara and Alan lived in. More recently, Macy Clark, another flight attendant with Atlantic Airlines, had moved with the couple and become more active in all our group activities.

Alan’s home was empty, but the new kitchen looked fabulous and Elsa commented on it as we walked back to my home.

We stood on the patio and looked at the pool. I said, “Of course, in your free time, as you choose to make it, you can use the pool or any other of our amenities. You may also invite friends or guests over at any time.

I pointed at a patio table, and after Elsa was seated, I got her a bottle of water from the bar refrigerator.

I sat and said, “Questions? Concerns?”

She began, “Mr. Toller – Dave – I wonder how I would function with the various sexual things going on. I am very European in my viewpoint about nudity, but I would hope that people would not, how you say, rub my face in their other activities.”

I interrupted, “If they do, I want to know who and that will stop. That’s not in our nature, in any case.”

“Thank you. I need this job, so I accept your offer, providing the compensations and other elements are acceptable. I would like you to consider it provisional for ninety days so we can each try each other out, so to speak. Is that all right?”

“Yes, certainly. I was thinking the same way.” I went on to give her another page that listed the whole compensation and benefits package. Jean had helped me put the figures together based on what we knew about each applicant’s work history. Elsa was the best of the bunch, so got the top dollar offer.

Elsa took the job and we arranged a room for her in my house, and then talked about the other fringe benefits.

Elsa moved in the following Thursday. I wasn’t around to help her move in, but she told us she didn’t have much, just her clothing, so it seemed an easy task. When I got home from Cyber Solutions, where I’d spent the day consulting, she was already in the kitchen fixing dinner for our large group.

I went and put on my athletic shorts and sporty t-shirt, and then went out to the patio. It was a warm sunny day. I greeted Elsa in the kitchen, asked whether she had questions, but right then she said she didn’t. Later, perhaps. I went outside.

What with the trouble with Carol, I was going out of my way to be there when she or Crystal got home. Carol’s crisis, triggered in part by Chet and Spence, made me realize that I was taking some people for granted. I didn’t want to do that.

Carol and Crystal did get home and joined me. They were already in very casual clothes. They each removed their shirts, going topless, and then partook of the wine I had ready for them at the patio bar. The rest of their day’s wardrobe consisted of their Daisy Duke shorts. These girls were sexy.

Crystal asked, “How’s the new cook?”

“First meal is underway. We’ll see. The kitchen smelled divine. I was hungry before I came out here just from the aromas.” He turned to the two, “Now, how’s the photography business.”

The three shared details about their day. Heather joined them, and then Elynn and Cory. Heather had remained nude, and Elynn was only in her bikini bottoms. Trish came over with Paul, Ross, and Kim, and the group grew. Alan and Tara also walked through the fence. She was gorgeously naked, and Alan only wore a towel around his middle.

Elsa came outside and came over to Dave. “What time do you want to eat? I can be ready any time after fifteen minutes.”

“Then let’s say six-thirty. I pointed at the tables that were already arranged with place settings. I hadn’t seen Elsa do that, but it must have been her work.”

I suddenly had an idea and I shot up like I’d sat on a cactus, and ran into the house. “Elsa! I want you to eat with us, if you can.”

She looked surprised and pleased. “Errr, I’m not ... topless.”

“You don’t need to be. I don’t want you to feel like a second-class citizen here. We so appreciate what you’ve done for us. This has been the most relaxed cocktail time for ALL of us, that I can’t remember another time like it. This is just what we wanted. Always, unless there’s some pressing reason, feel that you can join us. Besides, you have to meet everybody and get to know each of us better.”