Chapter 17: Intimacy Retreat

I pulled Edie up in front of the class with me to start the opening session of our nude retreat on relationships and intimacy. Alice had just been with us and given an introduction for both of us that was almost embarrassing it was so full of praise about our backgrounds. Alice also mentioned that we were active in a large polyamorous group of friends that loved each other including physically. She outlined the class, passed out class notebooks, and, at my request, had skipped mentioning anything about the nudity of the attendees.

Twenty-two people – eleven couples – sat at a ‘U’-shaped table. Many were still blushing and body language suggested they didn’t like their nudity, but were resigned to it in order to properly attend the retreat. I noted they were not a bad-looking bunch of people. Many were slightly overweight, but not severely so that I’d jump to the obese label. A few might have registered at chunky.

I turned to Edie, “Are you embarrassed about being naked in front of everyone?”

Edie smiled and shook her head. She’d expected the question. “No. I’ve always been somewhat of an exhibitionist. As Alice mentioned, I was a fashion model, did erotic photography modeling, and, I confess to you all, even did a few adult films when I was much younger and then got talked into doing one more recently with some of our friends. When I ran part of the modeling agency that Alice mentioned in my introduction, I always looked for exhibitionist streaks in the women that we represented; those were the girls that would succeed in the modeling field. You have to care what you look like, but it doesn’t matter what style of dress or undress you’re in.”

I asked, “A few weeks ago you were sad after studying yourself in a mirror; could you explain?”

Edie grimaced. “I’m almost sixty. That day I was finding every little thing wrong with me. I’d had a perfect shape, magnificent breasts, flawless skin, and face that graced the cover of Vogue, Elle, and other fashion magazines ... until recently. My mirror exam revealed brittle hair that’s getting uncontrollable, wrinkles forming everywhere on my face and body, cellulite galore in all the wrong places including places that show, and, last but not least a saggy butt and droopy breasts with wrinkly nipples.”

Edie turned and wiggled her back-end at the class, and then hefted her breasts with both hands at everyone as though she were aiming them at the men and shook them. The class mostly laughed, which was the reaction she obviously sought.

“So, what do you feel standing in front of everyone naked today?”

Edie shrugged, “They have to take me as I am ... as I am becoming. I know I could do Botox and fight the cellulite. My whole body would need Botox. I could spend tens of thousands on plastic surgery, but I’ve decided not to do any of that. You love me as I am and so do all our friends, so why not ride that wave rather than torture myself about my lost youth. I’m holding off some of that with vigorous exercise, but I won’t have others do nasty surgical things to me otherwise.”

I turned to the class and pointed at my own developing male pooch. “Me, too.” I nodded at Edie and she went and sat down with Carl and Alice at the faculty table in the back of the room. “So, you have one woman’s view about nudity in this group. If you are self-conscious about your body, you have a viewpoint that fundamentally states ‘Get over it and move on. You can’t change it, so live with it.

“None of you laughed or ridiculed each other’s nakedness or a body feature, so you can rule that out as a concern. You’ve all seen each other now and no one was critical, although I did see a few hard-ons, including my own. You don’t need to be sexy to survive group nudity.”

I turned to one woman whose tent card read Sara, “You’re not blushing, may I ask why?”

Sara smiled, “I’ve been a nudist on and off for my whole life. My parents liked to go to a colony in the summers. I got past the socially-conditioned response a long time ago if I even ever had it. Even as a teenage girl I liked to be naked providing others around me were unclothed. People are taught to not expose themselves or else they’re embarrassed; we can unlearn that response.”

“Do you equate nudity with sex?” I dropped the blunt question on the group, but aimed it at Sara.

She chuckled, “Sometimes. I love sex and I love nudity. The two together are a lot of fun.”

“What about love in that mix?” Sara was playing right into my hand.

Sara didn’t quite understand. She tilted her head to one side. “You mean nudity, sex, and love together? What a fabulous combination. I’d never want to have anything but that in my life. I guess I’d have to tear myself away to eat and work once in a while.” She grinned broadly.

I turned to a middle-age man whose name was Franklin. “Franklin, you’ve been blushing since I briefly met you at lunch; could you explain?”

He nodded, “The only time I’ve been naked before this retreat has been to take a shower – alone in my bathroom. I feel unprotected even though I know no one is going to assault my genitals. I’ve already gotten aroused a couple of times, too; and I’m not be able to control my responses, so ladies please forgive my response to your beauty. I’ve been avoiding looking at my wife and the other women; all of them are sexy in my book and I respond accordingly. I do associate nudity with sex.”

The blushing woman next to Franklin volunteered, “I feel vulnerable in many ways – not just physically and but also emotionally.

I had everyone stand back away from the table and their chair. I told them, “Pair up with a member of the opposite sex other than your spouse or partner.” They reluctantly did. “Now, I want you to comment favorably on various aspects of their body, particularly their sexual parts. You should be explicit and detailed. You may even be a little crude. If what someone tells you upsets you, note why and forgive them; blame me. Take two minutes – one minute for each of you.”

A buzz then filled the room along with some laughter. After about two minutes, the room got silent. I then had them do it again with someone new. I noticed that Edie and Carl had entered the group and were with other men and women. Alice was watching from the faculty table. I did the exercise one more time.

As the third silence filled the room, I added, “Please give a full-body hug to the last person you talked with. I want to see a little action from this group.” There was more laughter but everyone did it. I even saw a few of the attendees kiss their last partner. They were all strangers to one another, other than their spouse or partner.

As people sat, I said, “I hereby banish the pink hue of embarrassment from this group. You’ve seen each other up close and personal, and even been able to comment on several other’s body parts. You also have three views from the opposite sex about parts of your body. Nudity is accepted here and even desired here. Gals, if the guys get a hard-on talking to you, appreciate that you’re ‘hot’. The guys can’t tell how you’re feeling unless you tell them; so, do that.

“I want all of us to be open, honest, authentic, and vulnerable to each other, but not at the expense of being so embarrassed that you can’t concentrate on the point of what we’re trying to induce in this retreat.” I smiled at the group. “If you go outside, you’ll enjoy the sun on your skin, the wind and elements around you in a new way. You are unprotected, but here, that’s good and desired.

“One aspect of our nudity is that it promotes an absence of bullshit, and does make strides to help us connect with each other in ways that unite us rather than divide or separates us from others around us. People who are naked are usually happier, more positive, kinder, and more connected. Please feel cleansed and blessed to pursue a new you that we hope you’ll find as part of this retreat.

“People that are naked around each other often have an intimacy with each other. That’s where I want to start.”

I got the group talking about Intimacy. We defined it, listed some prerequisites for it, and then discussed the various kinds – emotional, romantic, and physical or sexual. We discussed how it felt, and how one knew it was happening, and how to foster it. We listed about fifty synonyms on a flip chart, many turning out to be synonymous with love or being loved. We talked about intimacy in a relationship, timing, and how you could be intimate with many other people as well as your primary partner. No one argued that point.

I then gave an assignment, “We now know about Intimacy, and based on several of your comments it is voluntary and a choice we make in our relationship with somebody. I would like you to pair up with an unrelated member of the opposite sex again, and for the next forty-five minutes start to develop an intimate relationship with that person. You should leave this room and go someplace comfortable to the two of you. You may want to take a few moments beforehand to discuss your boundaries and potential actions with your partner.” I smiled, thinking about how those discussions could take hours and I’d given them five minutes.

“We’ll segue into our afternoon break, so let’s meet back here at three-thirty after our break. We’ll take a few minutes to talk about what you said, did, and felt, and then Alice will take over to talk about Love and Intimacy.”

Alice rushed up to me and blatantly rubbed her breasts against my chest. We kissed. She said, “I want to further our intimate relationship for the next forty-five minutes. I think Carl and Edie are going to your room. Could we join them?” Several of the couples heard her request and even did a double talk at my smile and acceptance.

We did join Carl and Edie, and only a few minutes later, I was pumping my cock into Alice’s furry pussy as she writhed under me in the missionary position. We timed out lovemaking so that we had our final orgasms for that round after a half-hour. That allowed us to enjoy our afterglow and then cleanup so we weren’t too odiferous. Carl and Edie came along in parallel with us.

As people filed back into the seminar room from the refreshment area outside in the hallway, I noted various degrees of physical touch and awareness between the retreat attendees.

After everyone was seated, I asked, “How many of you felt you made large strides into an intimate relationship with someone new?”

About half the class raised their hands. There were some smiles between various men and women.

I questioned those that hadn’t raised their hands as to reasons. I got back comments such as fear of intimacy, worry about what their partner would think if they went too far, anxiety at the short time frame they were given, approach-avoidance, need for trust, and worry about getting interrupted.

A woman named Leah said, “I liked my partner and wanted to do more, but I wanted my husband there, too. I wanted him to see us creating those emotions and the desire to be together. I want to watch him in action, too.”

Several seats away, “Bart, her husband, said, “I would have liked to watch that, and I did want her present for my pairing with Trish.”

I paused and asked, “Did anybody get physically intimate ... that might want to admit it?” I chuckled.

A man and woman sitting next to each other raised their hands and smiled. After checking with each other, Monica, the woman, said, “We made love. We couldn’t think of a better way to start and neither of us felt strictures about starting that way.”

Monica’s husband, Keith, was sitting on her other side nodding, but so was Paul, the man she’d gone off with. Paul’s wife, Karen, looked surprised but not distraught.

I said, “Homework for this evening. Explore further the role of intimacy in your primary relationship, and, if you can, also the secondary relationship you were given in this class exercise. Alice is going to talk about love. Does that related to what you’re doing?”

I turned the class over to Alice.

Alice ended the class at five-fifteen, urging everyone to join together for a cocktail hour before dinner. I was surprised to see some of the catering help at our retreat center also in the nude as they served everyone wine, beer, and some hot and cold hors d’oeuvres. Several waitresses were in their early twenties and had bodies that rated as boiling on the ‘hot scale’.

As expected after class ended, Jim had a bevy of beauties around him. I was only mildly jealous, mostly because I attracted my own following. Carl and Alice were both in their own clusters as well. Jim and I had talked and decided to be entirely open about our polyamorous natures.