Chapter 3: The Storm Continues

Hump day, Wednesday, and I was working from home in an empty house. Jimmy left Monday on what was scheduled to be a three day trip. His plan was to return home late Thursday, or Friday morning, depending on if he was talked into going to lunch with the client on Thursday. The latest weather predictions had much more snow coming today and tomorrow, which meant Jimmy may not make it back until the weekend, or even early next week.

I leaned back in my office chair and reached for my coffee. Even though I had been working for over an hour, the sun was just beginning to show over the snow-covered horizon. I drained what was left in the cup and headed to the kitchen for a refill. I chuckled when I rose thinking that working from home had at least one advantage. While I did have on a bra and blouse, and had done my hair and minimal makeup, I sported panties as the only other clothing on my body.

With the coffee refilled I sat back down to try and finish the current section of the contract I was editing before taking a break for breakfast. I looked down at the printed document, but couldn’t focus. I kept replaying the phone call from the previous night. Jimmy overreacted when I didn’t engage in phone sex. Sure, we talk dirty plenty, but there were also many phone calls in which we did not engage in sex. The more I tried to recollect the conversation, the more certain I was that he abruptly ended the call without saying “I love you,” let alone goodbye.

I felt my stomach tightening. I was waging a battle over Jimmy’s faithfulness. The problem was that it was just a feeling, a woman’s intuition, that was not based on anything really concrete. I went through a similar battle when pregnant the first time with Frederick V. After I missed a period I spent two weeks certain that I had lost the baby. Morning sickness was credited to the despair of losing a child and not a byproduct of pregnancy. Jimmy had tried to talk me into moving my doctor’s appointment to earlier in the month to reassure me that the baby was fine, but I snapped at him every time he mentioned the topic. When I eventually did go to the doctor, she recommended that I see a therapist to address my fears, but again, I snapped at the doctor saying that I was now fine knowing that the baby was OK. The rest of the pregnancy was uneventful and I delivered a healthy baby boy without complications.

As I continued to think of that pregnancy, I recalled that throughout the first trimester Jimmy displayed a complete lack of empathy and understanding, oftentimes overreacting to the smallest things. There was also the very distinct time when I wondered if he was having an affair. Right after we confirmed that I was pregnant Jimmy was insatiable. Sex was daily, if not multiple times per day. When I started to question the baby’s viability sex was non-existent. At the time I assumed Jimmy may be giving me space, but then he left for a weekend get-away to attend his college roommate’s wedding, and when he got back he barely touched me for months.

Twenty minutes slipped by as I continued to dwell on my thoughts. It wasn’t until I got a instant message from Reginald asking if I was going to join the meeting in progress that I snapped out of my obsession. I put on my headphones and joined the meeting, but was soon thinking about Jimmy and my current worries again and paying little attention to what was happening on the phone call.

Just before lunch I got a instant message from Happy asking if I had time to chat. I replied in the affirmative which caused my phone to ring a few moments later.

“Hi, Happy. What’s up?”