Chapter 6

Well, I stunned my dad. He started crying on the phone and asked me how I was. I was still crying and said I needed help. No, I was not in trouble, but I still needed help. He asked me for my address and said he would be right over.

A while later there was a knock, and I opened it. I had not seen him in so long, I just looked at him, seeing the gray in his hair and the fine lines around his eyes. He reached out and pulled me into a big hug. He was crying and was telling me how much he missed me. I had him come in, and we sat on the couch and I told him about how I had messed everything up. Cheating on my fiancee, hooking and drugs, doing porn for the last six years, all of it. He sighed and told me he knew most of that, but was glad I was off the drugs.

I then admitted I had been drinking, a lot. He sighed and asked me how much. I told him and he sighed again. “Linda, you need help baby. You’re still on parole, right?” I nodded, and he said he was stepping in. “Pack a bag, I’m taking you somewhere. How much is your rent here?” I told him, and he asked if I had enough to cover it. “Actually, I have plenty, money is not a problem daddy. I would not call you for money.” He smiled at me and caressed my cheek, and said he would do anything he could for me, and he was starting now.

I handed him all the money in my purse, about $1,000 as I had cashed my check the day before. I then showed him a receipt for the rent, and he said he would take care of it. I then got into his car, and it was not a bad one. He started driving and told me he had been clean for years now. “I work a printing press for the LA Times now. I’m in the Union, and for the first time in my life making the right choices. Well, the first time since before your mom threw me out really. Her, your sister, and you are the best things in my life. And I’m so glad you called me baby.”

We got off the freeway, and I realized we were in Silver Lake. Dad pulled into a little bungalow, and he grabbed my bag and had me follow him in. There he introduced me to Sally, who was my step-mom. I smiled and said congratulations. Dad put my bag in another room and then went into his bedroom with the phone as I talked with Sally. She said she was glad to meet me, and that she and Mandy had become friends. Once again, it struck me how much of my life I had missed.

Dad came back in. “OK baby, you’re spending the weekend with us. I already made arrangements. On Monday I’m taking you to Altadena. There is a treatment facility there, you are already approved. It’s a two month program, they will get you right again.”

“But dad, I can’t afford that!”

“You don’t have to, I called in some favors. The County is going to pay for most of it, I will cover the rest. So you just relax here, and let me take care of you. I am so glad you called me, but why not your mom?”

I cried and said I could not call her. “Dad, she doesn’t know what it is like! I told her about my drug problem, and she said she did not know why I did not just quit. She did not get it, it’s not that simple. My girlfriend left me, and I knew I needed help. You are the only one that could understand.”

Sally reached out and rested her hand on mine. “Not the only one Linda. I’m in recovery also, I met your dad because he volunteers at the same place you’re going to. We will both do all we can to help you get better.” I cried, and they both hugged me.

Dad asked gently what had been going on, saying some he knew from mom. I sighed and told him and Sally everything. The years of pills, the crack. Becoming a prostitute and doing porn for most of the last six years. Sally actually surprised me when she said she had been there. “You were an escort, I was a streetwalker. Turning tricks in the downtown area for enough to buy my next rock. I was separated at the time, but still legally married. After I got arrested for prostitution and possession I was ordered into rehab. But because I had insurance through my now ex, I ended up there instead of with the county. And there I met your dad.”

Wow, so Sally and I did have more in common than just my dad. They had me take a shower, then I slept for a few hours. I woke up in the middle of the night and needed a drink. I went into the bathroom, and all I saw was a bottle of mouthwash. I drank it all, then went back to bed.

The next night I killed the Listerine, then they drove me to rehab. I will say this, it was a lot nicer than the High Desert County facility. Oh, it was still a jail, but the guards were nicer. And the room was nicer, I shared it with only one girl named Mary. She had an issue with quaaludes.

I was sick and had shakes for days. Two times I got caught trying to sneak out. No real idea how I would get a drink, I had no money. But dad, Sally, and my mom were there when I got my 30 day chip. I hugged my mom and cried, and she said she was proud of me. She said Mandy sends her love and was working on Wilshire still. I looked at her and said “Really? She sent me her love?”

“Linda, she wants to try again. Did you not read her letter?”

I shook my head, and she took my arm and said we needed to take a walk. There was a nice garden area, and we sat next to a fountain. “Pete told me about your computer, and the letter. He said he read it and called for Holly and Mandy to join him at his house. They all read them, and Mandy told me they all wrote you letters back. They are inside your computer, Pete said he left it with Rocco after he fixed it. They all forgive you and just want you better baby. Just as I want you better.”

I held her and cried, wishing I had not messed up my life as bad as I had. I told her I had called dad that night after I got home so did not even know Pete had fixed my computer. But I promised to look inside as soon as I got home. Then it was time for her to go, and I hugged all of them and said I would see them the next month. Dad and mom both said they were making sure everything was taken care of at my place. “The four of us even cleaned it, and threw out all the food that has gone bad.”

“Four?” I asked, and Sally grinned. “Me, your dad, your mom, and Mandy. I still go over every few days so it looks lived in.” I hugged her, and thanked all of them again for helping me through this.

Finally, it was over. I got my 60 day chip in a small ceremony and hugged mom, dad, and Sally. We actually had an early dinner at a Mexican place, and they took me home. It was cleaner, and dad asked me where I hid my bottles. I looked at him, and he sighed. “Baby, this is still a tough part. You will be tempted, where are they?”

I told him that since Sherry left I stopped hiding them in the house. But in the past, they were always hidden in the trunk of my car, and my desk at work. “OK, I already cleaned your car. And there were bottles everywhere in here, so I believe you there.”

When they all left, and I spent the night alone just watching TV. On Monday, I went ahead and drove to Rocco’s. I saw that Sherry was in the office now, in my old job. Well, I fucked up my own life enough that I was not about to ask for my old job back and get her fired. Rocco came in and I told him I had been in rehab and was leaving the industry completely. He sighed and said it was probably for the best. He wrote me a check for $5,000. “Here, this is your last pay and at least most of your royalties up to today. I will have the accountant figure out the full amount and send it to you. Can we help you in any way, Linda? Do you have a job lined up?”

I thanked him and gave him a hug. “I’ll be fine Rocco. Honest. This will get me through the next few months until I get back on my feet.”

He said to call him at any time and walked me to my car. He put the computer inside, and I gave him a hug. He told me to call Dirty Pavel if I wanted a more regular job. “He has a lot of girls that work for him. Receptionists, cleaners, things like that. I bet he can help you if you need work.”

I asked him about his computer, and he smiled. “Keep it, Linda. I bought it for you, not the company.”

I went home, and once inside I removed the keyboard and mom was telling the truth. Three letters! I sat down and read each of them, and was crying the entire time. Mandy did not exactly forgive me, but she wished me all the best, said she wished I had not gone through what I had. And that she wanted to see me sometime when I was better. Holly said she was sorry for my troubles, and she had long ago forgiven my attempts to seduce her. Pete, it was much the same. Mostly that he had never wished me bad, and he was glad I was doing better. And to not try and avoid him, and he hoped if we met again in the future it would be like our last meeting had been. Not like the meetings before that.

I sat there and cried. If not forgiving, at least they were not hostile anymore. I saw some mac and cheese in the freezer. Thanks, mom! I heated it up in the microwave and tried to decide what to do next.

The problem was, I did not know how to do much. Dirty Pavel was possible, but he wanted gals that knew how to use a computer. Harry had shown me some, but not enough to get a job. The only thing I really knew how to do was write dirty scripts, strip, and fuck.

The next day I got some newspapers and went through them. And other than fast food, there were no jobs I could really do. So I called Starlight Ladies. They were glad to hear I was back and said they would put me back as available. And as it had been months, I really needed to get laid. Fingering myself and using my toys was nice, but I wanted more.

When it got dark, I put on a short blue dress and headed to Harlow’s. A discreet bar I had been to off and on. Mostly with Sherri, as we could dance there and nobody bothered us. Other than the occasional dyke, who thought two femme girls needed dykes in their lives. Fuck that, if I wanted somebody who tried to pretend like they had no tits and acted like a rude guy, I would just get a guy. And thankfully, Sherri had always felt the same way. In fact, over the years we were together she had long ago even dumped her Punk Skater look. And now she was amazingly femme.

Samantha welcomed me in and asked if I wanted my usual. I shook my head and asked for a soda. She looked at me, and I pulled my 60 day chip out of my purse. She actually came out from behind the bar and gave me a hug. “Honey, I’m proud of you! OK, no alcohol for you, and your sodas are free. And if anybody offers to send you a drink, I will discreetly tell them you do not drink, what’s your favorite juice?” I told her pineapple juice. “OK, I’ll suggest they send you that. That you would have to pay for, I can only give you soda or coffee for free.”

“I thought as a bartender, you would want me to drink Sam?”

“Oh no honey, I just want you to have a good time. Drink booze, drink coffee, it’s all the same to me. Here, come have a seat.” She gave one of the trucker types a beer and gave me a soda. “Honey, I know what you and Sherri do for a living. I do not judge, but when you did that, was it for pleasure, or to entertain those that watched them?” I chuckled and said the guys always got pleasure, as I had rarely shot a scene where the guy did not have an orgasm. And we at least enjoyed it most times, even if we did not actually get off. But ultimately it was for those that bought the tapes.

“Same thing here. My job is really to entertain. Make you all happy, talk if you need an ear, keep the fun going. And if you have fun, you should know you do not need alcohol to have that. And a lot of girls in here are like you, if you want I can introduce you to some.” I asked her how she knew I was looking for company, and she sighed. “Honey, this is the first time I have seen you in what, six months? And you’re here without Sherri. I don’t have to be a genius to realize you two broke up, and you went on a bender to judge by that chip. But it’s OK, I’ll help you whenever you come in.”

Well, I ended up chatting with Sam most of the night. I danced with a few gals but did not feel any spark. Then at the end of the night as they were cleaning up Sam asked me to come to the back, she wanted to show me something. And I was a bit surprised when she took me into an office, then pushed me against the wall and kissed me. And I kissed her back. She moved her kisses to my neck, then whispered in my ear that she had been wanting me for years. “And I know I took up most of your time tonight, so you did not meet anybody that caught your interest. You know I have a girlfriend, but we have an understanding. We each are allowed little dalliances, so long as they are not affairs.” And by this time, she had reached under the hem to my dress and had her hand in my panties.

I kissed her deeply as her long slender fingers slid into me. I unbuttoned her black dress shirt and was glad her bra closed at the front. I was leaning against the wall, her fat nipple that was atop her large breast was in my mouth as her slender fingers were inside my cunt and making me realize how much I missed the touch of somebody else. It did not take long for her to make me cum, and I was biting her nipple when she made me cum again. I pulled her hand out as I kissed her passionately, oh fuck I needed that!

We gave each other more tender kisses, and I thanked her. “Oh Linda, no need to thank me. I was not kidding, I have wanted to do that for ages. But you were with Sherri, and I never get involved with somebody in a relationship.”

“Is it really OK with your girlfriend?” I asked, slightly nervous.

She giggled. “Well, you know who I live with, right?” I shook my head, and she smiled. “Well, it’s Blue. We’ve been together for over two years now. She told me that if I did not take care of you tonight, she would.” We both giggled. Blue was cleaning up in the bar, she was a small girl, not much bigger than I was. I did not know her real name, we all called her Blue because she had blue hair.

“Blue too?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh honey, Blue too. She has told me in the past she would like to see what it is like with somebody smaller than she is.” I smiled and kissed her again. We went back into the bar, and all three waitresses applauded. Blue came over and kissed Sam, then grabbed her right hand and kissed it. “Hmm, I’m glad for the two of you. Just remember Linda, we on occasion share. But she’s mine.” I kissed Blue gently and said I had no interest in coming between them. Blue giggled and said I would never come between them, they were not into threesomes. Then she gave me a wink, and said “Usually.” We all laughed, and I kissed each of them softly then waved goodbye and headed on home.

The next afternoon Starlight called me and said they had a date for me. It was a straight outcall job, from 7 to 9. I thanked them and started to get ready. I carefully shaved everything, had a light dinner, then did my makeup. I got into my knee-length black dress and got my purses set up. My real one I would leave in the car, the small clutch was just for business. Condoms, lube, some wet wipes, and a pad. Plus $40, a spare key for my car, and pen and paper.

The guy was older, but we gave each other what we needed. I got a good long dicking and a nice orgasm, he got two of them, one in my mouth and the other into the rubber in my snatch. And the $100 tip was nice also.

I was averaging one to two dates a week for the next month. And more than a few times at Harlow’s I got lucky as well. I even had a few dates with people I knew before. Marcus called one time and said there was a party for Lovely Angels, and asked me to go with him. They were celebrating a new studio they had bought, and I saw several I had worked with over the years were there. Mel was there, and she ignored me. I saw Sherri, and I avoided her. The shock was seeing Holly’s old boyfriend, Jack. I tried to avoid him, but that was not possible as he recognized me as soon as I recognized him.