Chapter 38

As I came through the front door, I saw that Marian was waiting for me. “So, any news?” she said.

“No, nothing yet. They’ll get back to me in a few days. The doctor was nice,” I said, “very good looking.”

“Hmm, I’m sure,” she said. I think she was actually a little jealous, very little, but a little.

And we had to wait. It was six days before I heard again from the doctor’s office. I was asked to come in. I sighed. Another half a life time in the waiting room. But Leona was smiling; she was making more money and she apparently needed it. She had a little boy, seven or eight years-old I guessed, to take care of.

I arrived at the doctor’s office right on time, and the receptionist actually summoned me right away; I mean as soon as I came through the doorway. I mean no waiting in the lobby? This could not be good.

I’d been seated in the exam room for no more than a few minutes when the good doctor Winstrom entered. She was not smiling. I was getting a really hinky feeling.

She sat and stared at me for maybe five seconds. “Mister Willis, sometimes these kinds of things do happen after a significant period of time,” she said.

“Okay?” I said.

“Mister Willis, you were in prison as I understand it,” she said. “But you were released about five or six years ago?”

“Yes,” I said, “1994.”

“Mister Willis, you have developed an infection in the brain. It’s serious, but treatable.” she said. All of a sudden, I felt sick. “That’s why the headaches and the sleeplessness you been suffering.”

“Damn,” I said. “But you said treatable.”

“Yes. Sometimes the side effects from the medications can trigger unintended consequences. This is one of those times. We will be changing one of your medications and altering the dosage of the others. It is more than important that you follow instructions. This is the brain, Mister Willis, no wiggle room. Again, Mister Willis, following the directions, that the nurse will give you a hard copy of, is essential,” said Doctor Winstrom. I was nodding. At least I didn’t have full blown AIDS or some other disastrous complication. I sure as hell didn’t need any of that being added to my problems with the Laughlin Willis’. I had a thought.

“Doctor, there is one thing I would like to request. I really and truly mean this. I want my records sealed. I don’t want anyone to be able to access my records. Really,” I said. “If the goddamn Congress of the United States want ‘em, tell ‘em to fuck off! Okay?” She seemed shocked at my tone if not my words per se.

“Okay, Mister Willis, I will see to that,” she said.

I wondered how long it would take for the bad guys to find out, even with my records sealed. I figured they’d buy somebody to find out. He was real good at buying people.

I wondered how they’d react after they did find out that my med situation was becoming complicated. I knew how they’d react: I would be swamped with a sea of pity: just exactly what I did not want any part of—damn it!

But maybe this once I’d get lucky and they wouldn’t find out. Wouldn’t that be the cat’s meow. The thought actually made me feel kinda good, it was relative. But then reality appeared as a mental specter to ruin my positive thoughts. Could this be a prelude to me getting the real bad thing? Hell yes, it could, and I was scared. I really didn’t want to die, not of AIDS. Shit. I had to think.

The drive to Turtle Park was only about four miles. I found a shady table to plant myself and ruminate. The day was sunny and warm, well it was still summer for a couple more weeks; a few months more and it would be the year 2000. Years came and went in my life all without a lot of meaningfulness, not for me.

I thought about how my death would affect the lot of them, and maybe especially Marian. I remembered our high school days, and how she’d fucked me over at the prom. It seemed childish now, but that bit of high school rejection on her part had literally led to everything that was going on now, and, at base, led to my time in prison. It really was true that a stone thrown into the ocean sent ripples around the world.

I wondered if I had in the end gotten handed a death sentence, because of this HIV thing. I wondered if I would have any final maudlin meeting with Ava before I expired? I sure didn’t cotton to being part of a room full of tears and sadness and forlorn what-could-have-been-ness. And yet, a moment of tender goodbye-ness ... Jesus what a mess! I was not ready for any of that. But the good doctor had said whatever it was that was going on was treatable. I just had to hope that it would be treated successfully. But the fact was I had no control over any of it, not really.

A couple of hours later I found myself parking in my usual spot at our place, Marian’s and mine. My eyes were dried out, and I was ready to give her a slightly modified and positive version of my appointment.

I had to work, and visitors from Laughlin had stopped coming by for the short run, well, two months was a short run: it was December, 26th,1999. I was kinda surprised. Especially after the pressurized meeting with Ava. I had thought I’d be getting more: visits and pressure that is. But I hadn’t, not even for Christmas, though we had been invited for Christmas dinner and for Thanksgiving too; we’d made our excuses per both and demurred.

Marian had bought into my explanation, relating to my doctor’s appointment, that I’d had the flu, but that I was fine though I needed to be careful. And I was determined to be careful at the least.

“Blake Willis had kept his promise to his wife and did the digging as to his brother’s health, and what he’d found, actually Regis, Jacob Paskin’s man, had found, was worrisome. He was sitting in the dark tapping his fingers on the table in the mansion’s library. Ava Willis was on her way home from the doctor’s where the twins had gotten their flu shots. He figured another half hour.

Oops, he’d figured wrong. She came in smiling. “The kids have been shot,” she laughed. “They are healthy and immunized.” He tried to smile, but his efforts were futile. “Why the darkened room? It’s nice out.” The kids had run outside to play.