This is a continuation of Just Plain Bob’s story, Orgasms. When I had finished his story, I had an OCD moment and wrote this the next day. Please read his story first to get the background.
I sat at the conference table looking out at the absolutely spectacular view and saw nothing. Not the snow on the mountains, the murmur and bustle of the employees outside the room I was in ... not a thing registered in my conscious mind until the door was yanked open and I saw Jolene stride into the room. Bev, Rob’s sister, and Derek, Marcia’s husband, walked in behind her. My hand started to tremble, so I quickly hid it in my lap and gripped it firmly with my other hand.
Jolene looked at me, half in pity and half in scorn, as she said, “Well, Addie, you really screwed the pooch.” She then shook her head. “I have to say when you do something, you do it up brown!”
I love Rob. Let there be no mistake about that. A kinder, more thoughtful husband you’d never find. A lot of our friends joke that we could be Ozzie and Harriet or the Cleavers on Leave it to Beaver. I went back to work, as first a secretary and then a salesperson for a chemical company, after our three children went off to junior high. I have a degree in chemistry and my talent is that I can translate chemical formulas into plain English. I exercise regularly to keep my 38 X 27 X 40 shape from ballooning out into a blimp. The three children is why I went from a C cup to a D cup and added two inches to my hips.
Our children, Barry, Marcia, and Ralph, are grown now and have moved out of the house. I think our lives, Rob’s and mine, would have continued to plod along if it hadn’t been for my best friend, Sally.
I have known Sally forever since we grew up across the street from one another. I was calm; she was energetic. I was reasonable; she was spontaneous. It was the classic case of opposites attracting one another.
It was three months before Rob’s and my 25th wedding anniversary. I was sitting in a booth at the corner diner where Sally and I met every weekday for lunch. Sally was running late, as usual. The waitress had already delivered our drinks when Sally hurried in.
“OMG, girlfriend!” gasped Sally as she collapsed onto the bench. “I am so wasted!”
“Wasted?” I asked in astonishment. “You’ve been drinking? At this time of the day?”
Sally’s laughter pealed out and everyone in the diner turned to look.
“Heavens, no,” giggled Sally when she finally stopped laughing. She got and my look on her face and whispered, “My new boyfriend, Billy ... we did the nasty this morning and I’m wiped out from the two massive orgasms he gave me this morning. I could barely walk and just made it to work on time, if you know what I mean.”
“Uh, um... , “ I hemmed and hawed before looking away from her face.
“Addie, what’s wrong? You’ve never been embarrassed before when we talk about sex.”
“I ... I ... I guess I’m feeling a little blue. Barry is in California, Ralph is now in Ohio, and Marcia has left for Georgia. Rob and I are now empty nesters. You and I have been coming here where I have heard about every one of your boyfriends and how great ... or rotten your sex life is.”
“So? Oh! Are you saying your sex life is in the toilet?”
“No, no,” I countered. “My sex life with Rob is good.”
“Really?” asked Sally in concern. She stopped talking when the waitress came over to take our order. After the waitress had left, Sally looked at me and said, “Okay, spill. You say your sex life is good. How good?”
“You know, good,” I answered. “Satisfying.”
Sally rolled her eyes. “Good? Satisfying? Good God, girl! Let me guess, once or twice a week in the missionary position.”
“We do more than just missionary,” I replied flatly.
Sally’s look of amusement was replaced by one of concern.
“But only once or twice a week and I’m guessing that he leaves you hanging.”
“I’m always satisfied,” I argued weakly.
“Alright, but no heart-screaming, pussy-gushing, muscle-twitching big O, right?”
“I ... I ... I’ve never had one,” I admitted softly.
Sally rocked back on the bench in utter amazement. “What, never?”
I couldn’t answer, so I just nodded my head.
“That’s ... That’s twenty-five years!” gasped Sally. “I can’t believe it. Have you talked to him? Honey, life’s too short to go without.”
“What?” I asked, getting a little peeved. “Go out and get a boyfriend who will ring my chimes?”
“Why not? I do,” joked Sally. “When I tire of one, I get someone else.”
“I don’t have disposable boyfriends, I have a husband who I love deeply.”
“Who, by your own admission, hasn’t given you an orgasm in twenty five years. Addie, that’s a problem.”
“There is no problem with Rob!” I said sharply.
“I know he loves you and you love him,” said Sally softly, “but no orgasms throughout your entire marriage? That’s a problem, whether you admit it or not.” She then grimaced. “It may not be Rob’s problem.”
“You mean, the problem may be with me?”
“Or a combination of the two of you,” stated Sally. “Something is just not right.”
I sighed, “So, it’s either Rob, myself, or the two of us together and there’s no way to find out which is which.”
“Well,...” Sally started to say. She then shook her head. “No, forget it.”
“No, I’m not saying anything.”
Sally gave me a hard look before reluctantly saying, “You know what the definition of insanity is?”
“You know, doing the same thing the same way over and over again and expecting different results. Think about it.”
I thought and then gasped out loud. “Oh! OH! No, I couldn’t!”
“I know you couldn’t, but you asked,” said Sally. “Look, our food is coming. I’m not saying you should cheat, but you do need to do something different.”
Lunch was quiet to begin with, but Sally soon regained her exuberance and got me to cheer up as well. However, I couldn’t stop thinking about my problem. Nearly twenty-five years of marriage and no orgasms. I purchased a couple of sex therapy books that day and tried several of their suggestions. No change. I varied our food, the way I dressed, the rooms we had sex in ... lots of things. Rob appreciated the changes, but it didn’t solve my problem.
It was now four weeks until our 25th anniversary and I was ready to climb the walls. Not having orgasms kept running over and over and over again in my mind. Insanity. As I walked into the diner for my lunch with Sally, I had finally come to the conclusion that something drastic had to be done.
“Hey, girlfriend,” greeted Sally as she rushed into the diner, late again.
“Hey, yourself,” I said with a smile. “How’s Billy?”
“Frisky!” joked Sally. “How’s Rob?”
“He’s good, but my problem has not gone away.”
Sally’s face fell. “Damn, I thought for sure the Kama Sutra book would have done it.”
“It was good, but didn’t help me. I’ve made a decision. I need to make a drastic change to see which one of us is causing the problem.”
Sally gasped and looked at me as if I had lost my mind.
“You can’t!” she exclaimed. “If you cheat on Rob, even if he never finds out, it’ll eat you up inside. If you’re planning on going the other way, you have a snowball’s chance in Hell of getting Rob to have an affair with another woman.”
“I know, but I need to do something. I can’t go on with this thought plaguing me. I’ve decided to sit down and explain the problem to Rob and why I have to ... experiment.”
“Addie, are you sure about this? Rob’s not the type to sit still for this.”
“I love Rob and I’m never going to leave him. You know how reasonable he is. As soon as I have explained to problem to him, he will understand why I have to do my experiment just for my own peace of mind. It’ll be just sex with no romance. I won’t go behind his back. He’ll be upset at first, but after he thinks about it, he’ll understand why so the two of us can move forward together.”
“I don’t know,” mused Sally. “How are you going to do this? You can’t just go trolling for guys because that will look like you’re cheating on Rob.”
“You’re right about that. Wait a minute. Didn’t you tell me Billy’s cousin is coming here for a conference?”
“Who, Kevin? Yeah,” said Sally hesitantly.
“You told me he was single and not seeing anyone,” I said, thinking it through. “He’ll be perfect. Can you call him and see if he would go for it?”
Sally shot me a skeptical look. “Girlfriend, you are a fox. You could go out with Kevin wearing baggy sweats and have curlers in your hair and he’d want to do you.”
“You’ll call him?”
Sally closed her eyes and shook her head before saying, “I’ll call him, but not until you get this okayed by Rob.”
Coordination between Sally, Kevin, and myself took a couple of days. I lied to Sally when I told her that I had talked to Rob and that he understood why I had to do this. The reasons for that was I really needed to find out if I was the cause and I didn’t want to talk to Rob until it was all set up. I could always back out, but I had to, and I mean had to, find out what was the cause of my problem.
The day before my date with Kevin was when I told Rob what I was doing. I knew he’d be upset, but I didn’t expect him to storm out of the house and not come back until after midnight. I had hoped to talk to him when he came home. I had fallen asleep, but I set my alarm for earlier than usual so that I could see him in the morning.
He didn’t come to bed that night and my alarm woke me just in time to see him drive off in his truck. To ask if I was miffed is like asking if the Pope was Catholic. The man would not just listen to reason. I dressed, went to work, and met Sally for lunch.
“Tonight’s the big night,” said Sally, picking at her salad. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“Yes, Rob understands why,” I replied. “Thanks for letting me do this at your place. A motel didn’t seem right.”
“Well, I think it’s going to be kinky hearing the two of you go at it with the headboard banging against the wall.”
“I’m just saying. Although, it’s Rob’s attitude that really surprises me.”
“Why? I told you he understands.”
Sally shrugged and it was time to head back to the office.
Damn it!!! I had hoped to talk to Rob when he got home and before I left. The restaurant where Sally, Billy, Kevin, and I were supposed to meet was less than ten minutes from the house. I was on the toilet when Sally’s call came in, so I couldn’t pick it up. Tomasino’s was much farther away and if I wanted to be there by six, I’d have to leave now. Stomping my foot, I put out the candles on the dining room table, put Rob’s plate in the microwave, and scrawled a note to him before I left.
Kevin was tall, good looking, and just a little more than half my age. Even though he knew where the night was going to end up, he was a gentleman. Dinner, dancing, and drinks at Tomasino’s had me in a good mood and I was shaking in anticipation as I drove the two of us to Sally’s house and her spare bedroom.
I was extremely thankful for my daily exercise regimen when I stepped out of my dress and Kevin gave me a breathless, “Whoa!” I was all aquiver as we laid down on the bed and his tongue speared into my mouth. His fingers strummed over my hard nipples and caressed my large breasts. One hand slid it’s way down over my belly to my very wet pussy. I couldn’t help, but gasp when one, then two fingers pushed their way inside me.
Kevin rolled over between my legs and I felt the tip of his hard cock touch my outer lips.
“Are you sure about this?” he asked.
“Make me orgasm,” I told him.
Kevin did try and I can’t fault his trying. We did missionary. We did doggie. We did cowgirl. He even ate me out with his jizz inside me. I sucked his cock twice to get it hard, but after the third time, he just collapsed into a puddle on the bed right next to my sweaty body.
“Holy fuck, woman!” he gasped, panting for air. “Get rid of your husband and marry me!”
“Thank you, but no, Kevin,” I said, gently touching his cheek. “You know this was a one time deal.”
“I’m sorry I made that agreement. Are you satisfied? I know you didn’t get the really big orgasm you were looking for.”
“Very much so,” and I was, even though I hadn’t hit the big O. I looked over at the clock and saw that it was a quarter till two. “I’m glad I took tomorrow off. I have to shower, get dressed, and head for home.”
“You sure I can’t talk you into staying?”
“No, I have to get home to my husband.”
I brought my own toiletries with me because I didn’t want to bring home any strange smells to Rob. I showered, douched, and changed into my everyday clothes. Everything else I left at Sally’s to be destroyed later. The one thing I did not want was for Rob to feel like I was rubbing it in his face. There was also an emptiness after Kevin and I were done. It felt like there was a place inside me that hadn’t been filled.
As I drove home, I figured that my experiment had showed me one thing. That my time with Kevin demonstrated I was the cause of my problem. I had to tell Rob that nothing happened when Kevin and I had sex. I was the problem and that it had nothing to do with him. It wasn’t Rob’s fault and we could work it out. We could go see doctors to figure out why I didn’t orgasm.
At home, the garage door opened and the first thing I saw was that Rob’s truck wasn’t there. I was a little concerned about that and prayed that he wasn’t tying one on and driving while drunk. As I walked into the kitchen, I was greeted by a splattered meatloaf on the wall and Rob’s meal and broken plate scattered across the kitchen floor.
I swept up the mess and washed down the wall before I headed upstairs. I was exhausted. I barely managed to get out of my clothes and into my nightgown. I prayed to God to keep Rob safe. As I was laying down, I thought about Rob’s arms holding me and the empty feeling I had inside me disappeared. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.
Beep! Beep! Beep!
I reached over to nudge Rob to shut off his alarm, but my arm hit nothing, but mattress. Groggy from lack of sleep, I looked up to see that his side of the bed was empty. With a groan, I flopped over and hit the alarm off button. Stumbling to my feet with my eyes half closed, I shuffled into the bathroom. Did you ever have that feeling that something was wrong or off? As I sat on the toilet, I felt that feeling.
I walked down the hallway to the spare bedroom to wake Rob and sit down with him to talk. I was surprised to see that he wasn’t there and that the bed had not been slept in. I hurried down the stairs to the garage ... no truck. We had to talk today! As I hurried upstairs to get dressed, I hoped that Rob had drank too much last night and was sleeping it off at a friend’s house. I opened our closet and froze. All of Rob’s clothes were gone.
I tried calling his cellphone and heard that his phone had been cancelled. I called Rob at work. On the 6th try, I was told that Rob didn’t work there anymore and had quit. That was when I lost it. I called the police. The officer who stopped by looked at the missing clothes and missing truck, and told me that it looked like Rob had left of his own free will. I called every hospital in the area to no avail. I tried all of our friends and acquaintances.
It was late afternoon when the phone rang and I frantically grabbed for it.
“Uh, no, it’s Bev,” said Rob’s sister. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of
“Oh, my God! He’s gone! Nothing happened and he’s gone! Nothing happened!”
“Addie, what’s going on?” asked Bev. I couldn’t reply, but just kept repeating my litany that nothing happened. “Shit! I’m on my way over!”
The next thing I know, I’m in The Emergency Room under observation and sedated. Rob called everyone that evening to tell them he had left me and why. I was pretty much out of it for the next couple of days. I do remember one episode where Barry, Ralph, and Marcia were at my bedside while I was heavily sedated.
“Mom? Mom?” asked Barry. “We ... We have to know what happened? What happened that night, Mom?”
Tears sprang from my eyes as I remembered. “Dinner ... dancing ... and ... and ... nothing. Nothing happened and I went home.”
All three children visibly relaxed at my semi-coherent statement and let out the breath they had been holding.
“It’s okay, Mom,” said Marcia. “You made a big mistake, but nothing happened. We’ll be here for you.”
“Do you think she is telling the truth?” asked Ralph of Barry.
“They have her pretty doped up. I don’t think she could lie, if she wanted to.”
I got out of the hospital and learned about the money in the bank, the power of attorney to sell the house, and the fact that Rob had virtually disappeared. He called the kids and his parents, but no one had his address or new phone number. He had blocked them from obtaining it. I was barely holding it together at that time.
With the children’s and Rob’s parents’ help, I managed to hold onto the house through that first turbulent month. I received a promotion at work and the extra money helped to settle my cask flow problems. I knew I needed to hold onto that house for when Rob came back home.
I tried everything, short of hiring a P.I. (too expensive), to find Rob and talk to him. The family kept me informed of his weekly calls, except for Bev, who made her contempt for me absolutely clear. I let her know that Rob was my husband and I would do everything in my power to keep him. I quickly turned down the one lawyer I talked to about filing for abandonment and garnishing his wages through his Social Security Number to find him. There would be no divorce because I was the cause of my problem!
Sally, after a month’s worth of ‘I told you so.’, thought up the plan of just sticking to what the family had assumed. They believed that nothing happened, so nothing happened. She presented that I had made a mistake going out to seek an orgasm, but had chickened out. Rob had left the house, so he didn’t know when I had returned home. I had qualms about her plan, but Sally told me she would back me up to the hilt.
Unfortunately, by the end of the third month after Rob had left, I was ready to start climbing the walls. Our sex life was constant and now mine was zero. I’m afraid my temperament showed it.
“Girlfriend, you need to get laid,” advised Sally over lunch. I opened my mouth, but she held up a hand to cut me off. “I know you love Rob and that you are waiting for him to return, but you nearly took the waitress’ head off when she asked if you wanted regular or sweet tea. Gob knows when, or even if, he’ll ever return.”
“Rob is my husband and I’ll fight to the death to keep him!”
“Yeah, you definitely need to mellow out before you turn into the Wicked Witch of the East. Maybe you need to ... experiment some more.”
“That would be all I need,” I scoffed bitterly. “To be caught red-handed by Rob’s sister, Bev, or one of Rob’s old friends. Even going out on a date will fuel the rumor mill. You’ve heard the rumors going around now, haven’t you?”
“Yes, but only you, me, Billy, and Kevin know the truth. Billy won’t say anything because he knows I would cut him off, at the very least. Kevin lives in California.” Sally looked down at her grilled chicken salad.
“You know you have that business trip to New York City the day after tomorrow.”
“You want me to cheat on Rob?”
Sally looked back up at me with sadness and concern in her eyes. “No, I want to keep you sane until we find Rob. It also wouldn’t hurt to try and solve your problem concerning orgasms.”
My promotion meant that I was traveling out of state twice a month for 2 to 3 days at a time to meet clients. On my trip to NYC, I met Don at the hotel bar. He was nice, bought me a drink, and we talked about the woes of having to travel for business. He noticed my rings and asked about my husband. I ended up telling him everything, except for my having sex with Kevin.
“Twenty-five years and not one orgasm?” he asked in astonishment.
“Rob is a good man,” I stated firmly. “I am positive that it is not his fault.” I pointed to his rings. “Does your wife have orgasms?”
“She did,” he said with a sigh that told me of her demise. He held up his hand to forestall my apology. “She passed away four years ago. So, are your experiments done with?”
“Why? Are you volunteering?”
“If you like. If not, I’m perfectly happy just sitting here talking to you.”
Don left me satisfied and sweaty on my bed at the hotel. He left the room just after midnight with a kiss on my lips. I didn’t have the big orgasms I was looking for, but I did feel a small release towards the end of our time together as he had me bent over the sofa and pounded me from behind.
“This is for my wife and your husband,” he gasped just before that small release and his filling my womb with his sperm.
Don tanked me the next evening. He actually had not been able to move on from his wife’s passing, but now he felt a kind of freedom for the first time in four years. We talked over dinner. I knew about business, accounts, clients, and the like. Don had been doing this for much longer than I had and he taught me in informal side of the traveling businessman. He showed me the games some of them played, the ruses they used, and how to identify the lounge lizards that must be avoided at all costs. He also told me of how to avoid an unethical predicaments with clients who saw you as a target, while still managing to keep them as clients.
“I’m sorry I could not give you the orgasm you were searching for,” he said later that night as he pulled on his pants. “I envy your husband when you catch up with him.”
“Yes, when. You love him to death. I have no doubt that you two will be together.”
From then on, I mellowed out only on my business trips, while conducting my experiments. The sex did improve my temperament, much to Sally’s relief, but not one of the dozen or so men could bring me to n orgasm. Was I satisfied after sex? Yes, but I still had that empty, unfulfilled feeling of not having Rob near.
It was a sad day when Rob’s parents were killed in a car crash. I hoped Rob would return to me, but I never saw him. Then I heard that he was at Bud’s Bar. I drove right over there.
As soon as I saw Rob sitting at the bar, I almost collapsed onto the floor. I was overcome by such emotions. I wanted to tell him everything. All that searching I had done was nothing, but a waste of time that I could have spent with him. However, I knew that Rob would never accept that. I had no choice, but to continue the lie that nothing happened.
Our ... discussion at the bar went about as well as could be expected. I really thought Rob would and could understand my need to solve my problem. What I had not understood was that he had taken it as a maligning of his sexual skill and manhood. I was shocked that he would take it to be such.
Rob avoided me at the funeral and the wake. The one thing I had not expected was for our three children to gang up on him and plead my case. I did not want them to be affected by my problem. I also had not expected for Marcia to sneak into her father’s room to look at his driver’s license to obtain his current address for me.
Rob left to go back to Denver and, now armed with his address, I set out to join him there. If he wasn’t coming home to me, I was going to go where he was and I was going to follow him forever, if that is what it took. I still had the power of attorney, so I placed the house on the market. I talked to my boss and agreed to stay for one final trip to NYC.
I flew out and checked into the hotel. After calling the client to confirm my appointment for the next day, I headed down to the bar. I barely sat down on one of the stools when the bartender slid a martini in front of me.
“Compliments of the gentleman at the end of the bar.”
I looked down and saw a well-built man with silver hair at his temples raise his glass of Scotch. I sized him up before I picked up the martini and nodded to him in thanks. Picking up his glass, he pulled out the stool next to me, but sat far enough away that he wasn’t invading my personal space.
“Good evening. I’m Alan Stevenson.”
“Hello. I’m Addie,”
Alan smiled and said, “I like a careful woman. Are the rings for show or are they real?”
“For real. Since we’re being direct, what are you expecting for the price of a drink?”
“If the drink is accepted, I expect some conversation to pass the time.” Alan then gave me a big smile. “Of course, you realize that expecting and hoping are two different things.”
“Ooo, aren’t you slick?” I chuckled. “I see no rings on your hand. Single or hiding them?”
“I’m hurt,” did Alan in false sadness. He then laughed. “I’m single. I haven’t found a woman who will put up with me ... or one I want to be with permanently, like you and your husband.”
My face fell and Alan quickly lost his smile.
“I’m sorry, Addie. I didn’t mean to distress you,” and he picked up his drink to move away.
“No, don’t go,” I said, catching his arm. It was hard and muscular, and could have easily pulled away from my grip, but he immediately stopped at my touch. His look of concern touched me and I found myself spilling out my entire story, including all the lies, and how much I wanted my husband back.
“The lies are what are going to get you in the end,” said Alan after I finished. “Lie detectors can be beat, but only with a hell of a lot of training and some drugs.”