Chapter 18: The Big Day

Time, as it has a habit of doing, moved on inexorably and the appointed day arrived.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man and this woman...” As the Bishop intoned the well known formal words for the solemnization of matrimony from the Book of Common Prayer various of those present had diverse thoughts.

David was thinking of his bride’s beautiful arse and wondering, How soon can I order her to let me spank her? Very soon I hope.

Standing beside him his bride was thinking, I am so looking forward to the ‘joining together’ on our honeymoon. David is so forceful a personality that I often call him Master in my mind, but he is so kind and gentle in bed until I get excited and then whee. As to the ‘forsaking all other’ that means Martha, I know that. And ‘procreation’, we haven’t talked about that but I am the same age as his older son. Will my babies, if I have any, be a problem in the family? Will he want to start another family from scratch?

Martha, who had slipped in quietly at the back after the bride’s arrival, was also thinking of the ‘forsaking all other’ and wondering, Will I ever have Jennifer in my bed again? I do hope so.

The bride’s parents were thinking exactly the same thoughts as each other, as they often did. My daughter married to a millionaire and best of all, out of the clutches of that Vicar woman. That is so good to know.

David’s sons’ thoughts were running along the lines of, Wonder how he managed to land a sexy looking bit like that? She must be after his money. Oh well, he worked for it and so it’s his to spend as he wants. He gave us a million quid’s worth of shares each so we don’t really have any claim on him.

The Bishop, whose mind ought to have been on his job, nevertheless was running on auto-pilot and trying to decide, Should I contrive to get rid of this Vicar before she costs me the biggest contributor this diocese has ever seen? And if so, who can I dump her on? I see she sneaked in at the back – so much for her expressed wish to stay away. Please, God, don’t let her object at the ‘speak now’!” And definitely, dear God, definitely do not let her say out loud, ‘She’s my lover’.”

However the Bishop’s misgivings were unnecessary and Martha’s crying was not noticed as several of the other ladies in the congregation were also shedding tears, for a variety of reasons.