Chapter 40

Nick Coyle knew and had known for a while that there were times when the world could shrink down to just two people. He’d learned fairly recently that such a small, exclusive world could expand to include a third resident. If he’d thought about it, he would probably have realized that it must be theoretically possible for such a microcosm to fit perfectly around four people. But even if he had, he might have been hard-pressed to imagine that it could happen on a Friday night in the middle of the hottest party in Europe while those four people were surrounded by a sea of dancing, writhing, sweating bodies, many intent on creating their own such worlds, at least for a little while.

Still, as he stood with Arwen on his arm and watched Pilar dance with Lev, everyone else seemed to fall away a little bit at a time. There must have been other people because he could feel their proximity. There must have been music because Pilar and Lev were dancing. But, he couldn’t have named a person or a song or much of anything else about those moments except to say that he had been there with his arm around Arwen and Pilar had been dancing with Lev. And although there was movement, it was like a series of tableaus. Pilar met his eyes and danced closer to Lev. Lev met Arwen’s eyes and put his arms around Pilar. Nick watched them and connected with them and found his arm drawing tighter and tighter around Arwen until it could be called nothing but an embrace.

And then, meeting his eyes one more time, Pilar purposefully turned Lev to look at her so that his back was to them and his eyes met only hers. Nick felt time slow to a crawl and knew that a moment was passing that might never come again, but he felt too slow and heavy to capture it.

“Come on.” Arwen laced her fingers into his and drew him away from the dance floor. Nick followed, his eyes on her, not daring to look back. It wasn’t until they’d left the party behind and were in the lobby waiting for the elevator to bring them upstairs that he found his voice. “Arwen.”

“Nick.” Arwen wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest. “My heart is beating a million times a minute right now and, if you say one thing to make me doubt what we’re doing, there’s a good chance that I’ll make a run for it.”

Nick closed his eyes and stroked her hair, pulling away only when the elevator arrived to draw them both inside. Arwen leaned into his chest again. “You do know I’ve always wanted this. Don’t you?”

“I know how long I’ve wanted it.” Nick said. Even now, it would be too facile to pretend he’d known Arwen wanted him back or believed now that it was so.”

“I just...” She reached up and touched his lips. “It took a lot to make this possible.”

Nick caught her wrist and kissed her fingertips. Arwen closed her eyes and shuddered at the gentle touch.

The door to his suite had barely closed when Arwen turned her back to him. “Unzip me.”

Nick’s fingers trembled only a little as he unzipped Arwen’s little black dress and lowered the straps before kissing each shoulder and letting it fall to the floor, pooling around her feet. She turned to face him in her bra and thong. “You look really good in that suit, but I bet it would look even better crumpled up at the foot of the bed.”

Nick laughed and crushed her to his chest. When Arwen tilted her head back, he kissed her fiercely, his tongue tentatively invading her mouth. She moaned and ran her hands through his hair.

“God, Arwen. How long have you been holding onto that line?” Nick smiled down at her, a lot of the tension going out of his chest.

“A long time.” Arwen reached up and untied his tie. “I haven’t seduced very many people and it was never really appropriate.”

Nick let his jacket slide off. “But you thought it would be perfect for me?”

“I thought it would be perfect for somebody I’d already seduced if things were really intense and it might break some of the tension.” Arwen sat on the couch and reached down to unstrap one of her sandals. “It worked. Didn’t it?”

Nick tossed his jacket aside and unbuttoned his shirt. “You know, for all the times I imagined us being together, I didn’t spend a lot of thought on this part of it.”

Arwen slid her shoes off, rose to her feet, and offered him her hand. “Then let’s not start overthinking it now. Come in the bedroom.”

Nick made to take his shirt off and looked down puzzled as it stuck around his wrists. He groaned. “Cufflinks.”

Arwen laughed and dropped her hand. “All right. Come in the bedroom and we’ll get you out of that shirt.”

Humbled, Nick followed her into the bedroom. Seeing Arwen sitting nearly naked on his bed waiting for him made him pause and take the whole moment in. But his trapped hands gave him a ready-made reason to approach. He did, holding them out.

Arwen guided him to sit on the bed next to her and helped him untangle the shirt enough to get the little gold studs out. After she’d pulled the shirt over his head and cast it aside, she said. “You’ve still got too many clothes on.”

Nick rose, kicked off his shoes, stripped off his t-shirt, and let himself out of his pants so that he was only in his boxer-briefs and socks, glad he’d drawn the line at the tailor replacing his underclothes with more traditional boxers. He sat back on the bed and peeled off his socks, then looked at Arwen, lying on the bed watching him.

“You’d think this would be easier. We’ve been friends forever.” said Arwen.

“I don’t think that’s how it works.” Nick said, but he leaned down and kissed her, his tongue again hesitant until she indicated with her own tongue that it was okay to proceed. When the kiss broke, he was lying on his side next to her, looking in her eyes, one hand running up and down her side.

Arwen sat up enough to unhook her bra and cast is away. For all that it was crossing a line that couldn’t be uncrossed, Nick thought there should have been a fanfare or at least time to brace himself. Still, he managed to stare only briefly before cupping one breast in his hand as he leaned in to kiss Arwen again.

And then it was easy after all. He stroked her nipple with his thumb and she gasped, biting her lower lip. They were no longer two old friends sitting on a bed wondering if they were really going to take things to another level. They were on that new level and there was nothing new to risk by proceeding further. Everything they were to each other was already on the line.

Nick guided her to lie back and shifted until he was looming over her, his mouth on her breast, sucking it into his mouth before teasing it with his tongue and grazing it with his teeth. She moaned his name and held his head close.

Nick felt like he could stay like that for a long time, switching breasts after a while, teasing Arwen into a frenzy, but already his hand was tracing down her form, sliding over her belly, and dipping under her thong. Arwen raised her hips and slid the last little bit of cloth from her body as Nick’s finger teased its way gently between her folds. She whimpered. “Oh, Nick.”

As his fingers probed deeper, Nick kissed his way down her body. The muscles in Arwen’s stomach were drawn tight as a drum. With each kiss, she quivered a little more.

Even though Nick had forced his mind to stay focused on the here and now, he couldn’t help but be swept up in the enormity of this moment. He’d loved Arwen and been in love with her since before he knew what being in love was. Sleeping with her nestled up against him, the only person in the world who knew and shared his pain, he’d dreamed that they would spend their whole life like two shipwrecked souls who never got rescued and might well have been happier for it. For all that he had desired the other women he’d been with, he hadn’t loved any of them the first time they were together, not like this. He already knew Arwen’s body as well as a platonic friend could and was delighted to find that it had more secrets to yield.

As he pressed his mouth against her sex, he drew in the heady, slightly musky scent of her and savored the taste of her inner flesh. As she quivered against him, he sought to worship the essence of her as much as to give her pleasure. And it was only when Arwen buried a hand in his hair and tugged to get his attention that he raised his head to look down at her.

Tears glistened in her eyes, but the sly smile on her face said there was no pain or fear behind them. She stroked his cheek with one hand. “Nick, please.”

He nodded and moved against her, shedding the last of his clothing and leaving the two of them completely unimpeded in the way they touched each other. Nick might have savored that moment, but Arwen was drawing him forward, eager.

They fit together beautifully, Arwen’s sex slick and ready for him. Nick moved carefully at first, then faster when she whispered that word in his ear. The second time she whispered “faster,” she bit the helix of his ear for emphasis. He raised his head to give her an indignant look and thrust hard inside of her. Arwen laughed and ran her nails down his back.

After that, their joining was less worshipful and more primal, Nick thrusting into Arwen and her raising her hips to meet him. He pinned her hands and kissed her mouth. She wrapped her legs around him and writhed against him.

For a while, Nick lost himself in the movement of their bodies. As important as this moment was to him, his pleasure was slow to rise yet again after he’d so aggressively put it through its paces earlier today. For a long time, he was less like a beast in heat and more like a lizard sunning himself on a rock.

Even so, the pleasure built and rose and, in the end became an irresistible pressure. In the moment, he looked down at Arwen and found her looking back up at him. At any other time, the attention might be too much for him to bear, but he was already undone. He held her gaze as he went over the edge and it was Arwen who, clinging to him with all her limbs, finally looked away.

He rolled away from her only reluctantly, staying close, not quite touching. Their bodies were both slick with comingled sweat. It made the palazzo’s air conditioning a little too intense. Without Nick noticing it, their lovemaking had undone the bed around them. He twisted somewhat gracelessly to hook his feet under the revealed sheet and lift it up to his hands well enough to pull it over him.

Arwen watched his acrobatics, then burst out in happy laughter. “That’s quite ... athletic of you, Nick.”

Nick rolled on his side and looked at her. “After all that, it’s the dismount you think is athletic?”

Arwen laughed again, rolled and squirmed until she was under the sheet with him. “It was all very impressive, Mr. Coyle.”

Nick rolled on his side to smile at her. “Will you stay?”

Arwen scooted in closer and made an affirmative sound. As Nick reached out and stroked her hair, she said sleepily. “It’s why I’m here.”

Pilar held Lev’s gaze as their bodies moved together to some cyclical, looping techno remix of a song she didn’t know. She’d locked gazes so that she wouldn’t watch Nick and Arwen leave together and inadvertently draw her partner’s gaze to them when he’d so deliberately looked away. But it was easy to get lost in Lev’s ice-blue eyes and the way he was looking at her was making her insides tighten in a most pleasing way.

When the look became too intense for her, she lowered her eyes to rest on his chest. “You’ve really become an excellent dancer in a very short period of time.”

Lev chuckled, a low booming sound in counterpoint to the music’s beat. “I had an excellent teacher and an intensive course. We trained nearly every day for weeks to get to this point.”

Pilar looked up at him again, not quite meeting his eyes. “Imagine where you’ll be in a year if you keep it up.”

Lev tilted his head so that their eyes met again. “Do you like me, Pilar?”

“Very much, Lev.” She didn’t look away now. “Do you really need me to tell you that?”

“I do.” Lev frowned a little. “Women who don’t really like me have always been bad news. But you’re so beautiful, even if you didn’t really like me, I think I might still want you.”

Pilar stumbled a little and might have lost her footing if Lev’s powerful arms hadn’t been there to steady her. She’d known Lev wanted her of course. There were a hundred ways a dancer could show how they felt about their partner and Lev didn’t know how to hide or fake any of them. But they’d never said a word about it out loud. Their attraction to each other was so new and unexplored that it couldn’t help but be a weak, nearly invisible flame compared to what smouldered between Nick and Arwen when they danced.

“You might be one of the best people I’ve ever met, Lev.” she told him firmly. “You’re honest and direct. You’re gentle and a gentleman. And you’re a good and loyal friend. I don’t understand who wouldn’t like you. I feel ... very lucky to be here with you right now.”

Lev seemed to think about that for a long time before answering. Then he said, “I like you too. You’re fearless.”

“Fearless?” Pilar lowered her eyes and blushed. She wasn’t sure she agreed with Lev, but it might be the best compliment anyone had ever paid her.

“Sure. The way you danced in the fashion show tonight ... just putting out who you were and what you wanted. I couldn’t believe people just sat there and watched. It was so...” Lev pursed his lips like he was looking for a word. “It was like everything you do. I worked on a construction site one summer. I can’t imagine how you got that kind of guy to do what you tell them.”

Pilar laughed, more out of embarrassment than humor. “I sign their paychecks.”

“And that’s enough?” Lev sounded like he didn’t believe her.

Pilar shook her head. “No. We had to fire a few to get most of the rest to behave ... And then we had to hire carefully not to get more of the same ... And we still need to fire guys sometimes because they won’t listen. Mostly, we look for older guys with families to support who can get through an hour-long interview without becoming apes.”

Lev smiled down at her. Pilar hadn’t expected any of this conversation. When she’d thought about being with Lev here in Milan, she’d imagined they would keep it light, acting on their attraction without talking about it, maybe pretending they were only passing the time while Nick and Arwen were together. This was different - much hotter, but fraught with emotional peril. Pilar wouldn’t have chosen this, but she didn’t begrudge Lev the connection he was seeking. She lowered her eyes. “You only think I’m fearless because you met me at a very good time in my life.” Looking up, she added. “Maybe we should talk about this somewhere quieter?”

Pilar felt his body respond to the suggestion and didn’t wait for the words to follow. Instead, she took his hand and led him towards the wing of the palazzo that Jazz had rented. As they reached the elevator, he asked. “You’re not staying with us this week?”

“I am. I have the room next to Nick’s, but I have one on this side too.” Pilar stepped into the elevator. “I thought this would be better tonight.”

Lev nodded and stepped in behind her. Pilar turned, eager to touch him. But just as the elevator door was closing, Gwen tapped it open and stepped in with a pretty Italian girl Pilar didn’t know. The girl pulled her hand out of Gwen’s grip and stepped back into her own corner of the elevator. Gwen looked surprised and a little hurt before she spotted Pilar and Lev in the back corner. The look on her face and her predicament might have been funnier if Pilar hadn’t been caught in a very similar situation. She took a half-step away from Lev.

“Pilar, hey!” Gwen leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. “You were amazing tonight - so fierce. I had to stay kneeling in front of Emily, but I kept peeking to see what you were doing. Really hot.”

“Thanks, Gwen.” said Pilar brightly. “It was a last-minute thing. So, I’m glad it worked.”

“What was the deal with that anyway? I thought everything was settled before we lined up.” Gwen persisted.

Pilar considered giving a noncommittal answer, but suspected the question had come from Jazz. She and Gwen were close friends, maybe closer than Jazz and Pilar. And Pilar was going to have to try to explain it to Jazz at some point. “The energy was all wrong at the end. Ceilidh was supposed to do this completely unimpressive little jig because she’s Irish. Emily waves her off and then Kiki comes out, wows her with the only impressive dance, and wins the contest basically by default. Then they leave. Yawn.”

Gwen pursed her lips and might have asked questions, but they were about to reach their floor. Instead, she said, “Honestly, people are saying the King chose wrong and that you were way hotter.”

The Italian girl cleared her throat meaningfully. Pilar smiled to indicate she was no threat for Gwen’s affections. “Thank you for saying so.”

The elevator door opening effectively ended the conversation. Gwen and the Italian girl went one way. Pilar led Lev the other way. As she let him into the room, she could feel that a lot of the sexual tension between them had dissipated. “Can I get you a drink?”

“Please.” Lev looked around the room, then back at Pilar. “Do I look ridiculous in a suit?”

Pilar walked to the wet bar and turned to look at him. “A lot of words come to mind. ‘Ridiculous’ isn’t among them. Did Simon say that?”

“Simon was surprisingly mellow tonight.” Lev said. “He told me I looked like a hitman who didn’t need a gun to kill.”

“I was thinking more like the unstoppable bodyguard.” Pilar went around the bar. “Beer?”

“Beer is good.” said Lev.

Pilar opened two beers and brought them over to where Lev was standing, handing him one, then clinking hers with his. “Cheers.”

Lev clinked bottles. “What are we toasting?”

Pilar moved into the circle of his arms, wrapping herself around his chest. She kissed the hollow of his throat. “This?”

Lev’s arms went around her. When he lowered his head, she tilted hers back and parted her lips for the kiss that fell on them. As Lev’s tongue teased into her mouth, she let out a low moan.

He drew his head back and stroked her hair. “Do you want this, Pilar?”

Pilar let her hand roam down Lev’s ribs. “Do you doubt it?”

“No, but I’d like to hear you say it.” Lev offered.

Pilar reached up and loosened his tie. “Lev Jessop, ever since the first time we danced together, I’ve been wondering what it would be like to be with you. And the more I’ve gotten to know you, the more appealing the idea has become. I want you.”

Lev’s lips on hers were more demanding this time, his kiss claiming her mouth, his tongue exploring just short of invading. One hand cradled her head. She tugged at his tie and fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. Having forgotten the beer in her hand, she dropped it. As she bent to retrieve it, Lev caught her by the waist, lifting her off her feet. Pilar gave a little squeal of surprise, then wrapped her legs around his ribs. Then she was kissing him again, this time from above, his head tilted back. When the kiss broke, she said, “Take me to bed, Lev.”

When she’d flirted with the idea of competitive ballroom, Pilar had teamed up with a partner who could lift her so gracefully that it felt more like flying. Lev was not as graceful, but he was stronger and Pilar flew to the bed.

When he put her down, he stripped off his jacket and shirt, baring himself to the waist. His hands went to his belt next and he undid it, but as he made to unzip his pants, he looked and saw she was still dressed, watching him.

“Aren’t you going to get undressed?” he asked her.

“I could.” Pilar had been fascinated by the muscles of his chest and intrigued by what she’d felt through his pants as his partner, but she wasn’t going to admit that. “I thought you might want to undress me.”

Lev smiled broadly, leaned over her, found the zipper on the back of her dress, unzipped it, and drew the dress down from her shoulders. Pilar raised her hips and let him strip the dress off the rest of the way. He did so with such vigor that her thong came off at the same time, sliding halfway down her legs on its own before she kicked it off. Wearing only her bra, Pilar lay back and placed her foot on the flat of Lev’s stomach. He leaned forward, one knee between her legs and kissed her deeply. His hands roamed up and down her body, but Pilar noticed that they only went to the top of her ribs, not quite reaching the bra.

She levered herself up on her elbows to look down at him. “Lev, don’t you want to see my tits?”

Lev looked up at her. “You don’t mind?”

Pilar reached up and grasped the front clasp on her bra. “Why would I mind? I think I have great tits.”

“You have amazing tits.” Lev laid his hand on hers. “It’s just...” He shook his head. “Never mind. Please let me see your beautiful breasts, Pilar.”

Pilar laughed and undid the clasp, letting her breasts fall free. Whatever reluctance Lev had shown vanished as he stroked and kissed them. When he took one nipple into his mouth and flicked it with his tongue, Pilar moaned and arched against him. The whole time, he stroked and touched her body. When his finger moved inside of her, he teased for a long time before going deeper like he was afraid of hurting her. Pilar loved the attention, but she was eager for more. She caught him by the hair and pulled his head back. “Lev, please. I’m not fragile. Fuck me.”

Lev nodded, leaned back, undid his fly, and stripped off his pants. Pilar had just a moment to wonder if she might have spoken too soon before his cock was pressed against her sex, the head opening her for more.

Pilar spread herself wide, her legs almost perpendicular to her body, her hands on Lev’s shoulders, urging him forward. He slid inside of her and kept sliding. Pilar was wet for him, but still it felt like he was filling her completely up.

“Take me, Lev.” she growled.

He pushed all the way inside of her and the pressure was intense, but not unpleasant. The next thrust was easier, but still left her holding her breath. The third felt so very, very right. Pilar closed her legs around his waist, not quite able to lock her ankles around the width of him.

“You can’t hurt me, Lev.” Pilar taunted him.

Lev moved harder and faster inside of her, looming over her now. As she clung to him, he growled back at her. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Good - because you can’t.” Pilar managed to gasp out in between thrusts. As a dancer, she was always happiest when she was testing her body, pushing it farther than she’d previously thought it could go. It hadn’t been much of a leap to discover it was what made her happiest as a lover too. She’d let herself forget it with Geoff, convinced herself that it had been a phase. Being single and being with Nick had reminded her of who she was. Being with Lev, adrenaline racing through her system as he pummelled her with pleasure and together they forced her body to accommodate his, it was a new experience. As she clung to him, she imagined herself clinging to the mast of a tall ship in a storm, bracing for each wave, but feeling incredibly, impossibly alive in the moment. It was necessary to forget everything else and hang on for dear life.

When Lev finished, she was too deep in her own experience to notice immediately. Her world was pleasure and trembling muscles and the salty, masculine taste of Lev’s sweat where she’d bitten down on his shoulder. He looked down at her and gently pushed the hair out of her face. The question and concern in his eyes were so obvious that she nodded, trying to catch her breath, the message being, “Yes. I’m fine.”

Lev rolled off of her and stretched out his arm for her to cuddle under. Pilar pressed herself against his side and didn’t try to say anything right away, giving her heart and her breathing a chance to slow.

For a time, Lev held her close and said nothing. Then, he pulled her gently forward and looked down her back. “You’ve got a nasty bruise here. Did I do that?”

Pilar thought about it. “No. That one’s from Nick, I think. It was a little stiff when we were at the party.”

“He hurt you?” Lev asked. He didn’t sound angry, only confused. Still, Pilar considered her answer carefully.

“Not on purpose. We couldn’t wait until we got somewhere soft and padded.” she said, keeping her voice carefully light. “Nick’s never done anything to me I didn’t want done. And he’s been willing to try things he wasn’t sure about for my sake.”

Lev gave a small grunt of affirmation. Then, after a few seconds, he added. “I don’t think I’m wired to be kinky. I don’t even really understand it. I hate the idea of hurting anyone.”

Pilar leaned in and kissed his chest. “Have you gotten a bruise while dancing yet?”

“I don’t think so.” Lev frowned. “Why?”

“I’ve gotten more than I can count.” said Pilar. “I’ve been extremely lucky to have never sprained my ankles or broken a bone or worse, but there probably isn’t a part of me I haven’t bruised at least twice. That doesn’t make me hate dance.”

“No. It’s just part of the process.” Lev agreed.

Pilar nodded. “And when dancers do injure themselves too badly to continue, they don’t hate the pain as much as they hate that they can’t keep dancing.”

Lev nodded. “All right. I can see that.”

“When I’m dancing, I feel so alive. And I feel the most alive when I’m pushing my limits - not if I’m actually injured, but if I’m pushing tired muscles to keep going to finish a routine or to land a move I’ve never landed before.” Pilar smiled. “It usually hurts and it usually feels more amazing than I can feel normally.”

Lev stroked her hip with one hand. “And kink is like that?” When Pilar nodded, he sighed. “Maybe I’ll understand it when I’m a better dancer.”

Pilar ran her fingertips over his belly. She was tempted to go lower and take his cock into her hand, but she resisted. Instead of directly asking the question on her mind, she said. “I can’t imagine you deliberately hurting anyone.”

Lev gave a mirthless chuckle. “You met me at a very good time in my life.”

Pilar wanted to protest, but she really didn’t know Lev well enough to say much about who he’d been before they met. Instead, she said. “Well, I don’t believe you’re going to hurt me, Lev. I’m hard to hurt.”

“You’re definitely tougher than I would have guessed.” Lev’s laugh had more humor to it now. “It felt like you were taunting me a little bit there.”

“I was.” Pilar playfully ran her teeth over his pec. “You were treating me like you thought you were going to break me and you weren’t going to break me.”

It was pretty good to be the King.

Emily loved her role in Jazz’s weird little Mad Max rip off. She loved being the center of attention. She particularly loved playing cold and imperious like she knew what people had been saying about her for years and was in on the joke. The only thing she didn’t like was that she had to sit through the whole fashion show when she could walk.

Considering that the whole show had been rearranged so that she could sit, she knew how ungrateful it would be to complain. But she was finally rid of those damned crutches. She wanted to be up walking, dancing, flirting, and maybe showing Dennis she was a much better lover when she had her full range of motion.

Arwen and Lev’s party had already started by the time she got home from her orthopedist yesterday. And while it had been easy enough to lure Dennis back to his room for some moderately acrobatic sex, it had been too brief an interlude for her taste with Dennis anxious to get back to the celebration.

She’d suspected what Dennis really wanted to get back to was Tiffany Patton. After he came back from Tibet, she’d let him set the narrative which was mostly about ayahuasca tea, DMT, and the possibility of going on tour to play guitar for Tiffany. She hadn’t asked him if he’d hooked up with her or anyone else. It could only make her sound like she was looking for more of a relationship than they had and there was nothing useful for her to do with the information. He said he hadn’t made a decision about touring yet, but Emily couldn’t help feeling like she was losing him to Tiffany one way or the other - however much she’d ever had him.

And so she’d arrived in Milan antsy and feeling more than a little neglected. On top of everything, Dennis had proven himself entirely unsuitable to the task of comforting her about Clive’s misfortune and her fears that she’d helped bring them about. He’d offered sympathy of course, but seemed annoyed when she expressed her fears about her own culpability. Arwen, Pilar, and Kiki had been much better company over the last few days.

Once they arrived at the palazzo, she’d had to start getting ready for the show right away. The show had been written pretty much from the ground up from what she’d learned and she had to learn the new script quickly. Compared to the girls who learned hours before the show that they were expected to dance, she had it easy, but it was still nerve-wracking.

And so it was that, by the time her palanquin was carried onto the stage, she was feeling a lot like the bitchy ice queen/king she was supposed to play. As the girls marched out, she looked them over with a faint look of disbelief as if to say “Is this the best we can do?” When the girls danced, she watched politely and then gestured dismissively.