Chapter 4

When Amanda Shapiro set foot inside her house to collect her things, she walked in on a very great shock indeed. Allen Shapiro, her conservative, indeed Orthodox, husband, was engaged in some very hot and sweaty sex with the neighbor’s daughter, Connie Rabinowitz, who was all of sixteen! She was a bit shocked, but given her multiple infidelities, she didn’t feel right protesting the first indiscretion that she had ever seen out of her patient, loving, old-fashioned husband. So, he was human after all! Good for him! He deserved a little pleasure out of life and a chance to actually live a little! In fact, Amanda was impressed with his ability to get Connie off.

“Wow ... that was something else, honey. Look, I’m glad that you’re discovering your sexual prowess and not moping around over my persistent adultery, but I hope that you got my voicemail and it still applies. I want to go and see the world, enjoy the kind of kinky fun that my new lover has in mind, and not be worried about what others would think. Besides, he’s the baby’s father and you get the idea. I want him to get to know his child and vice versa,” Amanda kept up the lie, still wanting to stay with David rather than Allen.

“That’s okay. I admit that I got the jump on things, but I was about to have you served with divorce papers soon, so I could marry Connie and make this right. We’ve been making love for weeks now, in her house so as to not flaunt it in your face. That’s more my style, not what you did. I have no desire for any woman but Connie. I’m still a one-woman man, but she’s my woman now. She, well, she can speak for herself. I don’t hate you, but I can’t live this way anymore. I have to be with a woman who understands me and my needs, just as I have tried to be patient while you resolved your needs while trying to stop cheating.

“She’s also pregnant to me, in fact. A month along, at least. We just wanted to wait until I could have you served and still protect my assets. I guess that’s no longer an issue, and yes, I got your voicemail. That was very considerate of you, but you and I are no longer an item, so let’s part as friends. I still love you, but I can’t keep you. Yes, you’ve been replaced, but largely because Connie is what I need. A righteous woman, this premature coupling aside, a proper Orthodox bride for me. She’s kosher. She observes Shabbos rigorously. She goes to temple and follows all high holy days scrupulously.

“Now, honey, please, give me one last kiss, collect your things, and go be with your man. If you marry him, the child won’t be a Mamzer. Just a thought. Speaking as one of the Faith to another, of course, with love. That’s your call. Anyway, I do wish you a nice life. Connie, do you have anything to say?” Allen turned to his teenage fiancee.

“Yes, thank you, Mrs. Shapiro. Thank you for the gift of your husband. It’s the best present that anyone has given me in my life! I’ll be grateful to you forever for that! I have had the biggest crush on Allen forever, and now he’s mine! Thank you very, very much! I’m being sincere, by the way, not sarcastic at all! I’ve had a lot of nice presents on my birthday and since, but this one takes the cake ... No other woman has given me her husband.

“Then again, I wouldn’t have accepted any other husband but Allen. He’s the man for me! If you leave aside this one sin of his and mine, he’s a righteous man and worthy of my love. And before you say that I’m too young, remember that the laws now permit marriage even younger ... and the Torah provides for it as well. This is the best gift ever!” Connie actually hugged Amanda, much to her surprise, even shock!

Amanda smiled awkwardly, gave Allen a last kiss (albeit without tongue, as she didn’t wish to stir up any jealousy or insecurity on Connie’s part), and got busy collecting her things, eager to leave with David and Denise and get a fresh start on her life. The open road beckoned and with it the possibilities of the future, even in a dangerous, post-apocalyptic world.

“So, how was it? Was there last-minute sex? Or was it more formal?” David asked Amanda with a wink, hoping that Allen took things well.

“Well, it was civil enough, and part of me wished that I had asked you to come in after all, but I still wanted to maintain the facade that you were the baby’s father. If you came in, there was a chance that would have been exposed as a lie. There was sex, but not involving me. It seems that Allen already lined up a replacement wife, being the resourceful man that he is. It’s our sixteen year old neighbor. Nice girl. She’ll be happy with him, even if they have to adopt to have kids, because I’m still convinced that Allen is infertile. Though I could be wrong and this could be his baby, I very much doubt it.

“Even if it is, the child will have the father in you that it really needs. Allen is nice, but he won’t raise children up in the best way for this world. He’ll be a great father, except in the sense of preparing them for the world outside of Jersey. Well, that and the whole religion business, which is closely tied to it. I like that you’re not all that pious or old-fashioned. That’s the kind of worldly mindset that needs to be passed on to our child. I’m Jewish, but I’m feeling very secular these days. I mean, what kind of God does this to His creation, anyway?” Amanda asserted.

“You got me there,” Denise spoke up at last.

“Same here. I do have trouble understanding things like this and the Flood, if that ever happened. Given the Fireballs, I’m no longer so sure that they didn’t, but what does that say about a Supreme Being who would cause such things? Maybe they’ll have answers in Haven, if we end up there. Maybe not. Smart money says to doubt it,” David shrugged as he kissed both ladies and kept driving.

The next incident involved David’s job, where he showed up one last time after all, to confront Steven, formally sever their employer-employee relationship, and collect his final wages, by whatever means available to him. The man had sexually harassed him for the last time. Ironically, David had never really taken sexual harassment as that serious a matter, but what Steven did qualified if anything did, of course. Usually, it was just some pretty staffer that didn’t like her ugly boss, so that automatically made him “creepy” in her shallow eyes. That was David’s impression of the whole issue until recently. Apparently, sexual harassment was occasionally a very real issue, if only seldom. Well, he thought, even the feminists got a thing or two right now and then by accident.

When David stepped into Steven’s office, he was shocked to be greeted by a kiss, a hungry one, and it wasn’t from Steven. Melanie Brewster, Steven’s sister and Kyle’s “hot wife,” still had the hots for him, evidently, as shown by the way that she wouldn’t keep her hands off him. He naturally wondered why she was present, but then Kyle, who was also there, was an attorney and Melanie was a notary public and an ordained Unitarian minister. There could be any number of reasons for her attendance aside from wishing to entice David back into bed with her. Thankfully, Amanda and Denise had tagged along this time. Unfortunately, there was a risk that they might encourage Melanie’s advances, which was something that David didn’t need right then from his perspective.

“So, you schtupped me and my sister, didn’t you? You’ve been a busy boy, David! So, I suppose that this is about your last pay? How do you want that? Barbeque sauce? Steak and eggs? I got loads of coupons for you! It would make things almost free for you,” Steven smirked, not eager to let go of his money.

“I want this week and last week’s pay upfront, now, in cold, hard cash! I know that you can make it up later, Steven. I cannot. I’m leaving the Garden State for good. Heading west, in fact. We’re done. I quit. Or you fired me or whatever you want to call it. But we’re done. I won’t be sleeping with you again. I won’t be working for you anymore. You’re crazy, plain and simple! Paranoid doesn’t begin to cover it! You have serious drug addictions up the wazoo, you have serious delusions of grandeur or conspiracy or what have you, and you have serious, sick kinks that I could never go for, not in a million years! So, get it through your thick skull. I’m not asking. I’m demanding my last two weeks’ pay. Cough it up, buster!” David insisted, being very pushy indeed.

‘Now, now, babe, play nice with my brother, please! You get more flies with honey, anyway. We were sorta discussing your severance package, and this was only Steven’s sick sense of humor, that’s all. You see, there is a condition attached to your final wages. Me. You must keep me. Take me along with you. Well, Kyle, too. We both want to tag along as you emigrate.

“Steven evidently had some notion that you were skipping town for good and he agreed to pay up if you kept Kyle and me around. Oh, not to worry, Kyle won’t sleep with your ladies unless you want him to do so. I can either forbid or command him to do that, depending on your wishes. That’s a hot wife’s privilege, you see. Nor would I try to monopolize you, keep you from their loving arms. You’re not under my thumb. He is.

“So, how about it? Take us with you two, and then we can all five head west together. Steven’s fine with that, mostly to get me out of his hair. I tend to annoy him, anyway, mostly because I won’t make Kyle fuck him. But some things Kyle won’t do, mostly because Kyle doesn’t like men. He’s given it an honest try, but it just does nothing for him. He’s okay with sharing ladies, but not with sucking men’s cocks or bending over for them. You might recall that from our threesome, right?” Melanie propositioned David, much to his chagrin.