Chapter 2

The arrangement continues; I said I would write on if there was demand, and it seems there is; I’m a bit hesitant because nothing is ever as exciting as the beginning of a relationship.

Anyway, here goes.

Our first month together was challenging for all of us; my house and my life was suddenly full of people, my free time was just a memory as I worked to become a father to Matt and a partner to his hot young mother.

They brought a social circle with them; his friends, her friends, their families. I did my best to charm them all, Weekends were booked up months in advance.

Reaction to our union was mixed; Wanda’s mother accepted me grudgingly, her father was openly hostile, and her brother was cool about it. My family was worse.

Wand and Matt didn’t cost me financially, Wanda’s job was sufficient for their expenses other than housing. They just sucked me into their lives because actually, their lives were more interesting than mine was.

Wanda was very physical; she would embrace and kiss me before and after going to work, sit against me on the sofa in the evening, or simply hold my hand when we were out. Small things, but pertinent. She did these things to make our relationship stronger, to bond.

I felt a bit self conscious about the hand holding in public. Wanda’s small size sometimes fooled people about her age, she was often mistaken for a teenager. Whereas I was obviously a ‘mature’ man, with my creases and bald head. At the same time, I liked it; let them look, let them wonder how a gawky old white loser had managed to get together with a gorgeous young black woman. Because I wasn’t sure myself.

I don’t have a large penis, or movie star looks. Yet when we made love, she was really mine. My ordinary white cock became super-penis when she touched me, I came like a volcano when she sucked me, and she came as I kissed, fucked, licked her.

I loved her, I was besotted, bewitched, shackled.

Sometimes, people looked shocked. Occasionally, there were comments. As I was waiting to pay the bill in a restaurant, a guy asked me how much I paid her.

I think I turned red with rage; I almost lost control before he apologized and retreated.

“What is it honey?” Wanda asked as we got home.

“Nothing.” I growled.

“Come on, no secrets we said. Tell me what you’re so pissed off about; did I do something wrong?”

My anger dissolved as I realized I’d carried it home with me, and was hurting Wanda with it. I pulled her tight, and told her.

“What an asshole!” she laughed, “You can’t get so upset by shit like that baby, this sort of thing is gonna happen sometimes. Now, take off all your clothes and I’ll make you feel better.”

As I undressed, I had to reflect on the incident; was I so upset because the comment was too close to home?

Wanda let her dress drop to the floor and revealed she was wearing a suspender belt and no panties, her smooth shaved brown vagina was delightfully prepared. She wore a black satin patterned bustier, and still had her pumps on. Her hair stood out around her small face in stiff uncontrollable spirals of defiance.

She was wonderful, terrifying, and I still couldn’t quite believe she was mine. My mouth watered and my cock stood hard and potent, aching to love her.

“God damn, Jason!” she said as she eyed it, “I love the way you get hard just thinking about it.”

“Thinking about you.” I agreed, giving myself a little stroke.

She stepped up to me, tall in her heels, sexy and black, her wide white smile her most alluring feature as her hand wrapped around my penis, pulling my lust. I put my nose to her neck and inhaled, associating her scent with the sensations and emotions of lust.

She sniffed me too.

“You’re a little smelly.” She told me, “Come on, take a shower first.”

“Together?”

“No, I’ll watch though.” She said, pulling me by the penis into the bathroom.

She stood there, small, beautiful, and black. I showered, pumping my hard soapy cock for her as she grinned in approval.

“Go on, make it squirt.” She urged me, staring at it as I stared back at her.

I let my eyes roam over her small sexy form. Her little feet, her smooth dark muscular legs, her delicious smooth groin, her narrow hips and firm petite breasts. But when my gaze reached her smiling face, I knew that was her sexiest feature. The way she smiled when we played these sexual games, the delight she took in sharing pleasure with me.

She stretched her hand out, reaching between my thighs to cradle my balls, and that was all it took to trigger my orgasm.

Wanda laughed happily as my semen hit the other end of the bathtub and rolled down towards the drain.

“Come on, baby.” She said, turning to the door, “Let’s do it.”

I lay on my back passively as she kissed my face, neck, breasts, belly, and cock. She sucked my penis gleefully, my white cock disappearing into her happy black face as ecstasy filled my heart.

“Roll over.” She told me, “on your knees, ass up.”

She reached around to hold my cock in her hand as her wicked tongue slid up the crack of my ass, and tickled my anus.

I was surprised at the intense sensation of rimming; if I hadn’t let a load loose already, I might have lost control. The erotic pleasure was crazy, absolutely wonderful. All I could do was grunt and let her do it.

“Oh, you like that baby?” she cooed, “Tammie told me to try that.”

“Tell her I appreciate it.” I gasped.

“Roll over!” Wanda insisted, and as soon as I did she slid her hairless twat down my stiff white rod, and proceeded to orbit, grind, and hump me.

As she did her thing, I opened the bodice and threw it to the side, so her tits were free

I knew the only way to keep them was to love them. Sure, I had a house to offer, but that wasn’t enough. I wanted to be indispensable, to trap Matt and Wanda just like they’d trapped me.

I loved that boy. He was like a light, he occupied a part of my heart that I didn’t even know I had. We bonded with terrifying speed, and I was a dad.

My mother was hostile, and refused to even come meet Wanda and Matt at first.

“She’s just using you, mark my words.” She said, “You’re pussy-whipped, you can’t see what’s coming but I can. Just think, son, use you head! Why would a young pretty girl like her want a ... um, man like you? Everyone’s racist, your customers are going to drop you and she’ll leave you broke as soon as she gets what she wants.”

But Mom was wrong. My business increased; maybe everyone is racist, but they’ll bend over backwards trying not to be. Wanda made me just a little bit special. She was the bling I’d lacked, proof that I wasn’t a loser. She made me appear successful just by her presence. A man who wins the love of an attractive [and younger] woman is a successful man.

My friends and my brother seemed to have a mixture of awe, fear, and jealousy.

As in all relationships, the first hot flush faded. That heady sexual lust couldn’t be maintained. Our lovemaking eased to once or twice a week. And contracted to mono-orgasmic. At best.

As our relationship changed from fairy tale to real, compromises were demanded of us both. We had our first fight, and it was bad.

It started as a small thing; she wanted me to come to her boss’s birthday party but I wanted to go to my brother’s barbeque. She was stubborn, and so was I; voices were raised and nasty things were said. Doors slammed on anger, and we each fumed for a day.

“Are you crazy?” Tim demanded, “Buy her a big bunch of flowers and we’ll get together another time. Man, you must be demented to risk a break up with Wanda. Every single guy in town will be out looking for her if word gets out about this, and half the married guys too.”

“So what, I should surrender all pride and eat crow?”

“Fucking aye, now get going.” Tim ordered. “Crawl, beg, plead. Consider jewelry.”

I stuck to flowers and an apology. Wanda’s scowl slowly eased, she accepted my contrition, and we hugged.

And we kissed.

As her lips burned into me, my cock stiffened, and she pressed against it with her thigh.

“You horny old bastard!” she whispered, “You just can’t get enough, can you?”

And the passion, the hot sexual passion was back. I laughed as I squeezed her tight, lifting her from the ground, my hands under her tight bottom. Clothes flew from our bodies by some sort of cosmic repulsive force, flung from us as we charged into the bedroom, eager for the sweet pleasure of reconciliation.

“Hold me down.” She whispered, “I want to feel your man strength.”

She struggled against me as I clamped her wrists in my hands. She struggled harder, and I increased the pressure of my grip. I held her shins under mine, and used my feet to pull her legs open.

“Like this?” I asked savagely, “You want it rough?”

“You bastard!” she agreed excitedly, and I maneuvered my hips around to get my cock into her, but didn’t manage. I had to shift my grip to hold both her wrists in one hand so I could use the other to put my cock in her. She struggled convincingly, pretending my hand was strong enough to hold her that way.

She was just a little wet, but as I poked and stirred my cock around down there, I felt her fluids arrive. I slid it into her tight little twat, and she shoved her pelvis up at me.

“Bastard!” she declared as I clamped her wrists in my two hands again, rendering her really helpless.

I laughed and rammed her, and she struggled and twisted. I didn’t really like the rape fantasy, but she did.

That was disturbing.

Anyway, it was just a game. In the end we came together in a rush of hard hot tight passion.

We went to her boss’s lunch, and hit my brother’s barbeque later in the afternoon.

My mom was caught by surprise.

“So you brought your little parasite.” She said to me, looking across the yard to where Wanda was chatting with my sister in law.

I was about to tell her what I thought of that statement, when Matt came barreling into me so hard I was nearly knocked off my feet.

Mom looked at the boy in surprise; and her face softened. No one can resist Matt for long.

The next day I told Wanda about it as she sucked my cock.

“I don’t want to get between you and your mother.” She said.

“If she can’t accept you then I can’t accept her either.” I said. “Rejecting you is rejecting me.”

“That’s real sweet baby, but you know my family won’t accept you either. It’s sad, but normal I suppose; the race thing pushes some primal button that maybe they could suppress, but with the age gap they just get bent out of shape.”

My stiff penis slid into her sweet dark mouth again, draining my brain as ecstatic excitement radiated through my body. I ran my fingers into her mass of uncooperative hair, looking into her wonderful eyes, and loved her. Loved her for the pleasure she gave me, loved her for the pain.

“Is that why they never come over?” I asked.

“My dad called me a whore.” She said bitterly.

“Shit, Wanda;” I said, pulling her mouth off my cock to kiss her and cuddle for a while. “You didn’t tell me that.”

“Well, it hurts.” She said. “Black people can be racist too.”

“Fuck them!” I exclaimed, “Fuck anyone who can’t just be happy for us.”

I held her and she buried her face under my arm, holding my cock tightly for security.

After a while she went back to it, and she lifted her face up and down, enjoying herself and pleasuring me. I didn’t want to come but I couldn’t stop it. When I looked into her big dark eyes, my stiff white penis sliding so easily between her dark lips, her little face in my hands, my libido would always overcome my willpower.

“Ummmm!” she grunted approvingly as she sucked and swallowed.

Was it possible that they were right? Maybe Wanda meant every word, she could be fooling herself too.

As I lay there in my depleted state thinking these dark thoughts, my dark lover turned around and lowered her groin over my face.

She was hairy now; I didn’t like it as much that way, but I understood that it took too much time for a working mother to keep it smooth. I accepted her, holding her hips as I submitted and licked.

I loved her; and I liked her too. She was young and energetic, still optimistic about the shitty selfish evil world.

I wasn’t sure how she really felt. We hadn’t ever spoken the L word, we’d made no plans. She and Matt lived with me in my house, and we had great sex. Well, I thought it was great anyway. And we had a puppy, and I loved them all and was terrified they’d notice I was a useless old fart and they’d all leave one day.

The cunt on my mouth wept, and she moved it around and I did my best to make her happy by licking and sucking, and picking up the boy from school in the afternoons, and cooking family dinners where we might bond.

She lifted off my face and pulled my wrist to roll me on top of her between her raised legs, and my cock slid into her well lubricated vagina. I was hard again; she did that to me.

We needed to talk more, I thought to myself as we had our splendid non-verbal intercourse.

“This is nice.” She grunted, her hands tight on my ass as I gave her what I had to give, sliding my old white thing in and out, lifting at the end of each stroke to press on her clit, until she came.

Watching Wanda come never got boring; my orgasm was useless to me, her orgasm was a triumph, a thrill each time. Her climax filled my heart with joy, my stiff penis inside her as she heaved and groaned was the only proof I ever had that I wasn’t useless.

If I could hold out though the thrill of her orgasm, I could bring her to another one, and I did.

“You don’t want to come?” she asked in a whisper when I pulled out, even though Matt was at his friend’s house.

“Nothing left in me.” I told her, “I like it when you come, I like it better than when I come.”

“Such a sweetie.” She sighed as we went to sleep.

The boy grew; the dog grew. My bills grew. My gut grew.

I didn’t care about the bills as much as Wanda cared about the gut.

“See this ass?” she demanded, “Do you think it’s just luck that it’s the same size it was when I was 16? I’ve been on a diet for 10 years. What did you eat for lunch?”

“A burger.”

“Well if you want to keep eating this, you’re going to have to give up eating that.” She said, “You’re twice my age and bald as a rock, and that’s ok; but fat I won’t tolerate. It’s a turn off.”

I was angry, because she was right; but I was also gratified; she wanted me to be able to please her.

My mother was hospitalized and we thought the end was soon. I sat with her.

“Why don’t you marry that Wanda?” she wheezed.

“I thought you didn’t like her.”

“That was years ago.” She said, “She makes you happy, and that boy of hers is a like a tornado. Promise me you’ll marry her.”

“I can promise to ask.” I said.

“I didn’t want colored grandchildren.” She admitted; “This world is harsh, they’ll face discrimination. But if they could be like that Matthew, they’ll be fine.”

“Mother, I’m 62 years old.” I reminded her, “It’s a bit late for making babies”

“But Wanda is just 32.” She said.

I bought a ring with a fat diamond; it cost as much as a decent car.

I chose a night when Matt was at his friend’s house, made a sophisticated dinner, and lit candles.

“Oh, I see where this is going.” Wanda said. “Keep it all hot while I change.”

She came downstairs in her sexiest evening dress, a glimmering pale blue thing that showed her marvelous figure and contrasted with her dark complexion.

“Is it hot?” she teased.

“You know it is.” I replied, staring at her in only slightly exaggerated lust.

“You seem a bit nervous.” She observed as we ate.

I produced the box. She smiled. I opened it; the smile went away.

“What’s this mean?” she demanded.

“Wanda, will you marry me?” I asked her.

She pulled back and stood up as if I’d scalded her; she looked horrified.

“Why did you have to go and do that?” she wailed, “You’re not satisfied with things as they are?”

I was honestly shocked. I’d never proposed before, I didn’t know this sort of reaction was a possibility.

“What do you want from me, Jason? Babies? Is that it, your momma is dying and you’re feeling all mortal and shit, and you suddenly noticed you’re 62 years old and you thought hey, I could knock up Wanda and she’ll take care of everything, right? Well I told you when we first got together I don’t want more kids, I got knocked up when I was 17 and I’ve been there and done that, if you want kids you should have found another woman, I told you exactly what I want from you and what I have to give Jason! Me and Matt live in your house and that’s been just great, and I’m your girlfriend, and that’s been great too, but no one said it was forever, Shit, Jason! Why did you have to go do a stupid thing like this?”

She ran upstairs and slammed the bedroom door behind her.

I was still sitting there numbly when she came down again, in her normal clothes and with a travel bag.

“Where are you going?” I asked.

“I’m not your wife and that’s none of your business!” she snapped, “I need some time away from you, don’t call me!”

And she was out the door, in her car, and gone.

“Where’s Mom?” Matt asked me the next day when he got home.

The reason I get on well with my stepson is I don’t bullshit him. I didn’t tell him about the proposal though, just that she got really pissed off at me.

“Well, she didn’t say I can’t call her.” He pointed out.

“She’s at Tammie’s.” he told me when he got off the phone.

Tammie; flirtatious 40ish buxom blond dental hygienist at Wanda’s work.

When Tammie had me in the chair, she clamped my head in her left arm while scraping my teeth with her right; holding me against her big soft breasts the entire time.

I felt my cock stiffen but I couldn’t do a thing about it.

And then the fingers of her left hand, that were near my ear, moved. Just a tiny bit, just slightly, so that it could be ignored.

When I was single, women weren’t interested. Now that I was with Wanda, they were flirting with me all the time. Sad but true, a man with a hot woman is an attractive man.

Wanda’s sexy friend would do it with me if I wanted; all I had to do was give her a stare, a little touch. But I wouldn’t. I enjoyed the thrill of knowing I could.

A day went by, then another without communication. I was in turmoil, my whole being was made from desire and fear of loss. I was surprised; I knew I loved her, but I didn’t know I could feel so bad about it.

“Are you guys splitting up?” Matt asked over dinner.

“I hope not.” I told him, “I love your mom, but I’m old, Matt. She’s young and pretty. I wouldn’t blame her for bailing on me.”

“If she does, can I stay with you?” he asked.

I was really touched by that; “Of course, but your mom would have to agree. Whatever happens, you always have a home in my house.” I told him; “Remember that.”

Friday after school, Matt rode his bike over to Tammie’s. Wanda called around dinner time.

“So, you’re using my boy to get at me.” She said, “You manipulative motherfucker.”

“Yeah, whatever it takes.” I agreed. “Are you coming home, Wanda?”

“I dunno.” She said after a long pause. “Maybe it’s too late.”

“Why? What did you do?”

“We’ve been together for six years.” She said, “That’s the longest relationship I ever had. I was a single teenage mom and barely got through high school. I had to work, and I had to get my kid away from where I grew up. When I split up with Gary, I targeted you, Jason; I checked you out and went back to that shop every day until I caught you. I needed a man with free time in the afternoon and a house; I reeled you in and used you.”

“I know, you told me.” I reminded her, “And I was at the supermarket all week looking for you too. I was a dirty old white man hunting young black ass. It doesn’t matter, Wanda, what does matter is how we feel now. Do you love me?”

“You’re a good man. You took us in and you were always kind to us; I know I should be kind back, but I’m afraid.” She said.

“Of what?”

“Commitment, getting trapped. Yes, ok, I admit it; I do love you Jason, you have a big heart. I feel like shit being away from you and I feel worse about hurting you, but at the same time I don’t want to get tied down to...”

She stopped.

“An old man?”

“Yeah.” She admitted.

“Look, I just want to do right by you and Matt; what if something happens to you, do I get custody? What if one of us is hospitalized, who’s next of kin? I want you to have my house if I die, and if we’re not married taxes will kill that. I get a pension soon too. I love you both, I want that on paper. But if you can’t handle it, just come home and we’ll forget about it.”

“Jeez, nice speech. How long have you been working on that?”

“A few days.”

“You freaked me out with that marriage shit, I was scared.” She said, “I fucked up.”

“What did you do?”

“I went out. You know, with someone.”

The vice started to clamp down on my chest.

“Are you trying to tell me you’ve been with another man?” I choked out.

“Yeah. Well, sort of. Look, it didn’t mean anything to me, I did it because I thought it would get you out of my head but it didn’t. Actually, it was good in a way; now I know how I feel.”

“What do you mean ‘sort of’?”

There was silence on the line for so long, I wasn’t sure if she was still there.

“It was stupid.” She said quietly. “I ... thought it was what I wanted. I won’t lie to you, not about anything. We never lie to each other, do we? I went out with Barry, he’s a dental technician who works for my boss sometimes. I thought I would just reel him in and use him, you know?”

“How far did you take it?”

“Pretty far. Maybe too far to come back. I slept with him. We did it, he kissed me and went down on me and he put his penis inside me and fucked me, ok? Now you know.”

It was my turn to be silent.

“And now?” I asked finally, “Is it him you want? Have you had enough of me? You want to move to a younger, better match?”

“He’s younger, that doesn’t make him better.” She said.

“So you didn’t enjoy your night together?”

“Oh, he’s good in bed, that part was fine.” She clarified. “First time is easy though; always exciting. I told you I won’t lie, if you want that you got the wrong woman.

“I fucked Barry and I came, and I wanted to have his semen in me, because that’s important you know, so I went down on him, I sucked his cock Jason. And he came in my mouth, it was nice, and I swallowed it. We did it again in the morning, it was a blast. He’s all young and white and eager to please. He has a nice body, and a stiff prick, and a house and a job. He seems just perfect.”

My head was throbbing by that time, my chest felt tight, my mouth was dry.

I wasn’t the same man I was 6 years before. Living with Wanda had made me appear cool. Women flirted with me, and I flirted back. One or two had sort of indicated they were available. They weren’t hot and young and black like Wanda; they were suitable though. Compatible.

“So go live with him then.” I said angrily. “Matt said he wants to stay with me, you decide.”

I disconnected.

She sent a text a short time later; ‘On my way over we have to work this out’.

I sat in the gloom, fuming, angry, disappointed. All sorts of bitter thoughts racked my hurting head.