Chapter 1

I stood on the doorstep, nervously shifting my weight from leg to leg. I had come to discuss a sensitive matter with Mr. Fenton, a strong, older African American man who lived in a mostly white neighborhood. His son and my daughter had conceived a child, and I was determined to find a way to resolve the situation. The man observed me patiently from the doorway. Yet I imagined him not to be a person of great patience.

I took a deep breath and began, “Mr. Fenton, there’s an important matter to discuss. You son and my daughter have conceived a fetus.” As my hips shifted back and forth, I still couldn’t believe that this handsome, older man’s son got my daughter pregnant! I didn’t raise my daughter to be racist, but she always complained about how black men were white women’s worst nightmare. In this case, she happened to be right but in no way proves her previous prejudice!

Grady Fenton replied, “That is important. Come right in, and let’s discuss what can be done about it.” He made way for me to enter his pleasant home. I would never have imagined that he thought to himself, he would soon sieze pleasure in his home, whereas I would get only the pleasures that he allowed.

As I entered, Grady asked, “You know my name, what’s yours, Ma-am?” I replied, “It’s Lila Yavistan. Thank you for seeing me. I thought you might know how I should approach Rabb about this delicate matter.” I entered the home and looked around. The front room was spartan but neatly appointed with functional, nice furniture. I guessed Grady Fenton was a man of good taste and some means.

“Please, have a seat, Mrs. Yavistan. Can I offer you some refreshment?” He gestured to a worn but clean couch. He took a chair across from me and steepled his fingers together, his dark eyes studying me.

I accepted his offer, saying, “Um, I could use a glass of water, thank you. I worried about your son and my daughter on the walk over, my throat is dry.” I sat on the edge of the couch. This was no calm social meeting! Grady’s clothes were as neat and tasteful as his living room. I got a good feeling that he could help me. “Um, I prefer to be Ms. Yavistan.”

Grady replied, “Of course, one moment, please.” He rose and disappeared into the kitchen. He returned with two glasses of ice water. “Here you go...” He gave me a glass before sitting back in his chair. “Now, tell me, how old is your daughter?” His calm but strong face was compelling.

I answered, “Fortunately, my Nina is eighteen. I believe your son is older than that.” I understood Rabb did not live with his father.

Grady nodded, saying, “Yes, indeed, he’s twenty-two, and fully aware of his responsibilities as a man. And you said your daughter’s name is Nina?” He took a sip of his water, watching me over the rim of his glass.

I felt like I was being studied, but I guessed it was only natural for a father to learn everything he could about the mother of the girl that his son impregnated. “Yes, I very much want to settle the matter in a way where everyone understands why the right decision must be made, regarding the pregnancy.” There was more I wanted to say, but I found myself waiting for this self-assured host to ask more questions.

Grady asked, “And what do you feel is the ‘right’ decision, Ms. Yavistan?” He set his glass aside and steepled his fingers again.

I replied, “This is my opinion only. I can’t force it on those more involved than I, but it seems prudent to end the pregnancy. My daughter nor I am in a position to raise a child. I’m guessing, even at 22, your son is not ready to settle down and be a father.”

Grady’s voice was like velvet as he asked, “And what about marriage?”

I flinched at the suggestion, but his smooth voice was surprisingly calming. “Well, that’s up to them, of course, but do you see your son ready and able to be a husband and a parent?” My Nina was a flighty girl who needed more worldly experience, only without getting pregnant, before she would be ready for motherhood.

Grady replied, “That’s an excellent question, Ms. Yavistan. One that I’ll have to discuss with him. But tell me, what are your thoughts on the matter?”

I said, “My Nina is too young and not ready for motherhood.” I didn’t like how this man kept evading the matter, as if I was the one who bore all responsibility for the situation. “Please, can you tell me how I should approach Rabb about this matter?”

Grady gazed at me with two steel orbs. “Of course, but first, let’s talk about you for a moment. You’re a beautiful woman for your age. Have you ever been with a black man, Ms. Yavistan?”

I was put back by the question. But I didn’t let my initial reaction cause me to stop reasoning. “Are you perhaps asking if I have insight into my daughter’s situation, from her perspective?” I managed to refute other interpretations. “If not, your question is unsuitable for this discussion.”

“Forgive me, Ma-am. It’s just that you are a very attractive woman, and I can see why my son might have found your daughter appealing.” He stood and moved closer. “I’m sure we can come to an understanding if we are honest with each other.”

I felt a blush burn my cheeks and also uncomfortable at how Grady was controlling the discussion, I shifted on the couch away from him and stood up. “I don’t think we’re talking about the same things.” I set down my glass. “Thank you for the water. I should go.”

But Grady commanded, “Sit down,” his voice firm but even. His hand landed on my wrist, stopping me mid-flight. “We haven’t even started discussing the real issue here.”

I shouted, “Let me go!” It wasn’t like he grabbed me with any strength. Perhaps he communicated better through touch. I wanted very much to leave, as I intended, but my daughter’s three-week pregnancy was too important to skip out on a potential ally in negotiating with my Nina and his son. I found myself sinking my behind to the couch, but I could be firm too. “I came here to find out how best to approach your son, but if you have no advice in that regard, I will leave and figure it out by myself.”