Chapter 15

Shaking up, shaking down - September, 1961

I rang Pauline before breakfast, and asked if she would stay for tea and a ‘catch up’ afterwards.

“Do you mean stay the night?”

“Yes Please.”

“You talked me into it -you silver tongued devil!”

“See you for study group!”

Judith was making her breakfast when I went into the kitchen. We were clearly not right together as flatmates.

I bit the bullet. “We do need to talk, and I’m sorry I was a prick. I shouldn’t have given you a smart answer.”

She was somewhat mollified. “I haven’t got time to talk now. Is it just you and me for tea?”

“No, Pauline will be here for tea.”

“That’s why we need to talk and part of what we need to talk about.”

“Well we haven’t settled on a roster yet, but I’ll do tea tonight for you and me and Pauline if that’s okay. Does six thirty suit you?”

She nodded, and went back to her room. I walked to school.

It wasn’t too much of a surprise to receive an invitation to the School Ball during homeroom. Pauline could certainly dance, we had a longstanding arrangement as ‘fucking friends’, and we could both afford to miss our Friday night shift at Mary’s World. So I made a mental note to ask her that night.

But the Ball was nearly three weeks away, and in the meantime School Cert was coming and I faced a day of revision and mock exams, with a study group to follow. And I was cooking for three for six thirty.

In those days mutton shoulder chops were very very cheap, so I planned a casserole with potatoes and carrots and the freeze dried peas that were newly available. I detoured past ‘Auckland Meats Newmarket’ on the way home for the chops, so Aapi had biked over before I arrived home. He wasn’t going to stay for tea, but he was keen to pick up any cooking skills he could, and we managed to prep some onions and carrots and get the casserole in the oven before the girls arrived.

Study group passed without incident, with Aapi and Alison taking their usual ‘rest’ between revising angular momentum and Mendel’s laws, and Robyn whingeing briefly about Jack Gavin’s emotional cluelessness. Pauline and I related as though we had no outstanding issues, and perhaps we didn’t, but I couldn’t help wondering how much of what was happening with Maureen had got back to her via Mary O’Hara and Kevin.

We started work on a salad together as soon as Aapi and Alison and Robyn departed, and I asked her to ‘do me the honour of accompanying me to the School Ball’. She giggled and asked if another ‘catch’ like Jack Gavin might be available.

“In ya dreams!”

“Why didn’t you ask Maureen?”

That one was easy. “Because I would rather go with you.”

“Alright sir. I will be honoured to accompany you.”

Judith arrived on time, just as we were setting the table. She produced a fresh loaf of brown bread. Not proper wholemeal, but as close as we got in NZ in those days. We ate happily enough, mopping up the juice from the casseroled chops with the bread. Salads were new for me after moving in with Frank, since we didn’t have them much at home. I liked the ones Mum made, but Dad often just picked at what he called ‘rabbit’s food’.

Judith offered to clean up, but Pauline and I insisted it was the ‘cook’s job’ – well tonight anyway. Eventually we all sat in the parlour. I hadn’t relayed the tale of my stupid behavior to Pauline, so she had no idea what Judith had on her mind. But it was clear Judith wanted to talk and Pauline was (as usual) keen to ‘get on with it’. So she kicked off

“What’s on your mind?”

Judith shrugged and spread her hands “Doesn’t need to be a big deal, though it feels like you guys might make it one.”

I tried to defend myself. “Look, I made a stupid joke, and it went wrong from there. Please let’s just try to start again. It would be really good to get whatever issues are in the way sorted out before we have the added complication of another flatmate.”

Judith nodded, but Pauline pushed. “What was the stupid joke?”

“She said ‘we need to talk’, and I said ‘we’re not even having casual sex yet, so it’s too soon for the ‘we need to talk’ conversation.”

Judith evidently felt slightly defensive. “I told him to grow up – can you blame me?”

Pauline was quite definite. “No. He’s a fuckwit – at least sometimes.” She eyeballed me and went for the jugular. “So do you fantasise about having sex with Judith?”

Bulls ‘n horns. I took a deep breath, and then another, but Judith wasn’t waiting. “Well do you?”

“Yes. I’m a normal male and you’re an attractive woman.”

She coloured slightly. “I get enough of that bullshit at work. That’s why I work on contract, and go in as little as I can.”

I didn’t know what to say, how to explain, or even what to explain. I knew enough to know that ‘Sorry’ is always a good start, so I started there.

“It was a stupid joke. I’m sorry and I’ll never do it again!”

Judith’s lip curled and she sat a little straighter. “I’ve heard that bullshit before!”

“I know that ‘no’ means ‘NO!’. You were clear that I’d crossed a line and I recognise that.”

Again, Judith appeared unimpressed, and I suspected I was digging myself deeper, but Pauline rescued me. She turned to my new flatmate.

“But for you - the problem is his lecherous thoughts.”

Judith continued to look pissed off, but she nodded and Pauline went on.

“He’s a lot more honest about his fantasies than most guys, but he is always a gentleman.” She paused as Judith leaned forward slightly, and then continued. “You live here and work here. You need to be safe from guys coming on to you. He’s a decent person You’ll be perfectly safe with him.”

My head swelled slightly, and the phrase ‘a gentleman takes his weight on his elbows’ passed through it. I had just enough sense to keep my mouth firmly shut, and I was glad of that as Pauline went on further.

“But he’s also a fucken dickhead and a horny young prick. Now that you’ve given him the message, he’ll be a perfect gentleman. But he’ll still be a fucken dickhead.”

Judith’s laugh carried a touch of bitterness, but it was still a laugh. Pauline joined her, and Judith reached out to put her hand on Pauline’s arm.

“Aren’t you jealous?” I mean of him lusting after other women? I wanted to get things clear so’s it’s understood I won’t be a party to cheating.”

“He’s not my boyfriend. We’re friends who fuck sometimes. We don’t even have an agreement to tell each other if we go with someone else!”

“Jesus! How old are you guys? How do you make that work?”

“Sixteen and a bit, and it seems to work okay if we are both really honest about what we are feeling. We can generally sort stuff out.”

Judith took a breath and turned to me. “Okay, just so long as it’s clear that I’m just a flatmate and you need to understand that and behave appropriately.”

I was relieved. “Message received and understood. What are the issues we still need to talk about?”

“If we have a kitty, how are we going to manage if you have lotsa guests?” She looked at Pauline. “This isn’t just about you – Emma said a whole lot of you eat together on Fridays. It wouldn’t be fair to expect all those extra meals to come out of our kitty.”

I nodded in agreement and Pauline looked thoughtful. “You’re right. That’s not fair. But it’s really convenient to eat together before we do our shift at Mary’s World. How about we make it known that a contribution to our meal together would be appreciated?” She paused. “Or do you want money?”

Judith looked embarrassed. “Shit! This is hard.” She paused, I Hmmed, and Pauline waited. “It’s more the principle of the thing. I’ve actually got plenty of money. I do well on contract, I’ve paid no rent and had no living expenses for years – well ever really. And I’ve saved.”

It was clear she hadn’t finished, and Pauline and I waited. After a long pause she went on. “When probate for Grandad’s estate is granted, I’ll be fucken rolling.” She looked quite sad. “But I’ve got no friends really. The whole scene at work at Haines is all bullshit and status and who’s fucking who, and when Grandad was dying I was looking after him twenty four seven and trying to keep enough contact with work to make sure I had a few small contracts so they didn’t forget me.”

Pauline was onto it. “I suppose meeting Emma was an opening then?” Judith smiled and nodded. “Yeah, we hit it off straight away. I thought coming here would keep the connection and ‘ease me in’ to the world of flatting with landlords I like and have a connection with.” She looked at me as if she had just had a thought. “Do you lust after Emma?”

“Yup – at least I did when she was just Robyn’s aunt.”

Pauline, ever helpful, filled in. “Robyn Olds is Emma’s niece. She was David’s ‘temporary girlfriend’ last year. She’s one of the study group.”

“What’s a ‘temporary girlfriend’?”

“Girlfriend for now. No troo lurve and not forever. Exclusive except by negotiation.”

“And you stopped lusting after Emma when she got with Frank?”

“Pretty much. Stopped fantasising anyway. They’re getting married next year and they own a business and another house together.”

“What happened with Robyn? You used to be together. How come you’re not?”

I can’t pretend I hadn’t thought about a good answer to that question, so I made it simple. “Troo Lurve struck at the School Ball last year, and Jack gradually took sole possession of her body as well as her heart.”

Pauline took her opportunity. “I’m hoping for similar luck at this year’s ball.” She grinned at me. “But I’ll probably still keep fucking this dickhead for at least a few days after I meet prince charming!”

Judith’s lip curled again. “No one gets jealous! No one’s feelings are hurt. Bullshit!”

“Robyn and Jack decided to be exclusive around Xmas. David went away straight afterwards, so I don’t know how he was then – but he was a bit of a mess by the time he got home and I consoled him!”