Chapter 11: Nineteen

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Saturday. March 30th.

I drag my feet on the carpet out of my bedroom. My hands rub my eyes as I enter the living room. My vision comes to see Kendryck playing Call of Duty on his PlayStation. He smiles at me and pauses his game. “Morning, buttercup. Happy birthday.”

“Thanks.” I flop next to him. “Got anything for me?”

Kendryck reaches over the couch while looking at me. He pulls out a disk case. “I figured you wanted this.” He hands it to me.

“Oh shit!” I gasp. “Logic Pro? Real producers use this.”

Kendryck nods with a shit-eating grin. “Exactly why I got you that.”

“It’s like three hundred bucks.”

“Four, actually. I also got you extensions.”

“Thank you, Ken.” I give him a side-hug. “I really love this.”

“Now you can make some fire beats Guitar Band can’t do.”

I nod my head in approval. “You’re right. I’m definitely going to play with this.”

“Any plans for today?” He goes back to playing his game.

“I’m meeting Moeko for lunch and then I have my first, real shoot in Detroit.”

He pauses the game again and looks at me. “Does Moeko know?”

I go quiet. “No.”

“You need to tell her.” Kendryck’s face softens.

“I know, I will. I don’t want to ruin my birthday.”

He thinks for a second. “Isn’t that considered cheating?”

“It’s money. I don’t have any feelings for the guys I fuck. Sex for pay, whatever.”

“She might not think so.”

I tilt my head. “Are you saying I shouldn’t do it?”

“I’m saying you should talk to Moeko before you take this any further.”

I lower my eyes. “I really want to pursue this.”

“Why?”

“It’s thrilling.” My shoulders raise and fall. “I don’t get to feel that often. I love the idea, the passion, the hours it’ll take to film a scene millions will see.”

“You’re serious? Are you not scared?”

“It’s how I’m feeling right now. I want to feel free, and porn gives me freedom.”

Kendryck looks at the carpet and inhales. “If you say so.” He continues playing his game.

I stare at him for a moment, then get up. “I better go. I told her noon.” I check my phone, it’s almost time. “I’ll see you later tonight.”

“Be safe, man.” He doesn’t look up from the screen. I go by and wrap a coat around me before leaving the apartment.

I walk into Red Robin, telling the host I was meeting someone. In the bar area, I see Moeko at the end. She sees me and waves. I sit down with a smile. “Hey, how are you?”

“I’m great.” She leans in. “How are you, birthday boy?”

“I feel exactly the same.”

“You’re not excited about being nineteen?”

“It’s not twenty-one.” I shrug. The server comes over and writes down our drinks, two Dr. Peppers. When she leaves, we check the menus. My eyes go straight to the burger menu, landing on the cheeseburger deluxe. Moeko likes their chicken sandwiches and adds bacon and mayo. She got sweet potato fries while I wanted regular fries. The waitress returns, takes our orders down, and leaves to put it in the system.

“Tell me again why we couldn’t hang out all day?” Moeko asks. “What are you doing?”

“I have a photoshoot at three.” I say quickly.