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Author's Description:
Wintertime! Country Roads! School Busses! A little twelve year old girl with a crush...a young fourteen year old high school freshman on the threshold of manhood, who comes to care for her with a special fondness... treating her as he would a little sister. May you find this endearing story of two people's innocent affections for one another enriching as you enjoy this sweet poignant slice of life.
Size: 11 KB (2,218 words)
Genre: Romantic
Sex Contents: No Sex
Tags: mt/ft, Teenagers

Review by BikeWriter   [other reviews by BikeWriter]

Reviewed:


This is a lovely story with a tragic ending. Be forewarned, the end is extremely sad. Both characters were the better for having met. I may be the better for having read it!

Plot: 10 | Technical Quality: 10 | Appeal to Reviewer: 10

Review by Pleasure Boy 1   [other reviews by Pleasure Boy 1]

Reviewed:


This story is a brief little example of how stories can be told in few words. There's character. There's the hint of plot. And there's emotion. It just goes to show you that you don't need 500+ pages and raunchy sex scenes to tell a decent tale.

I like the way the author expresses character through action here. We see the character of the young boy as he teases the Dora. It's a simple gesture, but it goes a long way to making these into real people.

The end seems to rush a bit. The story the author had begun seems to disolve into a bit of an annecdote. I think this was intentional though. This wasn't meant to be an epic saga. Still, it would have been nice to see more of Dora before it ended, and more reactions to the events that concluded the story.

Other than that, it was good writing. Study it for Dag's characterization techniques. He's got some good examples here.

Plot: 9 | Technical Quality: 9 | Appeal to Reviewer: 9

Review by Daniellekitten   [other reviews by Daniellekitten]

Reviewed:


This is one of those stories that just tug at the heartstrings and makes you gulp.

A young man in high school waits at a school bus stop. He sees a young girl, two years younger but at their age, that two years is quite a lot. He teases her, but gently and never in a way that's mean.

She grows to like him and to enjoy their time together on the bus, just as he did. Since I don't want to ruin the storyline, I'll just say it was sweet, it was endearing and totally worth the time it takes to read.

It reminded me of my first crush, the guy that I wished would pay attention to me the same way as this character did for little Dora.

Very well written, the prose flows wonderfully. No errors that I could see, but in actuality, I was lost in the story. The author says that this is one of his best, and I agree it is too. Great job.

Plot: 10 | Technical Quality: 10 | Appeal to Reviewer: 10
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