FozzieBare: Blog

It looks like we're finally kicking things in to gear, getting better health wise. The prescriptions that I was without I now have once again (and it does make a huge difference), and I have an appointment later this week to get fit for the CPAP. I hope this means this weekend I can get back to writing.

Thank you all for your support and well-wishes, let's continue to take the next step right?

To those who never grew old.
To those americans who took the proverbial "King's Shilling" and served and lost everything.

Thank you.

Some will say that the conflicts America has participated in since the defense of world-freedom in World War II are ignoble. I will not judge. That is not what we do this day. Let others debate whether the causes were noble or ignoble.

I care not.

You were drafted, or you volunteered, and you served. And you died.

"Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.

Thank you.

We remember.

We will not let the flame that you kindled die, even though you have.


In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.



((I will have a regular update later in the week on my health and current writing status, but this was more important)

I'm still not doing great, but I'm doing better then I was. Thank you for your kind words.

I still want to write.

And I'm not 100% sure I'm talking about writing either.

It's been a rough month since I last talked to you, including numerous x-rays, tests, and even a couple visits to the hospital, one in an ambulance.

Between that and fighting the for profit healthcare system to get their thumbs out of their rear ends to get things I need (I am now at two months without the primary medicine I've been prescribed to manage the Crohn's and the arthritis (a major reason for all those x-rays and tests).

Seven Months waiting for the CPAP machine, despite being told it's just a bit longer.

So, here I sit, writing to tell you about all the shit I've been going through instead of giving you guys more content. I won't lie, I'm in a deep dark place mentally right now, and it's been impossible to string two words together.

But right now, I'm still feeling like I just have to keep taking the next step.

God help me if that changes.

Because I think the devil is running it right now.

I am officially in medical limbo, the CPAP machine still hasn't been ordered, months later, and now medicaid is requiring a fresh authorization for the medicines that keep me (mostly) upright and not in severe pain. Combine that with the fact that they're trying to wean me off the severe pain pills (a thing I DO NOT agree with right now), I am hurting. A lot.

I hope to get back to writing soon ish, but right now, a lot of it is outside of my control.