Some of this story is true.
My name is Ben Harris and this is my story.
Being married to Buket was exciting, frustrating and painful. Throughout our two years of marriage, somehow, I never felt truly married. Well, I felt married, she didn't. Buket was concerned about her figure, clothes, getting a green card, obtaining a masters degree and making a lot of money. She was never concerned about anyone except herself. I was never really part of the equation. Buket is 5'4" with blond hair, small waist, flawless middle Eastern/Eurasian complexion, green eyes and a 36c cup. She has the kind of sexuality about her that makes men get primitive.
For her, sex was a weapon to be used to manipulate every male she came in contact with. I don't miss her personality. I do miss the way she could rock my world in bed. There was very little she wouldn't do and I loved her lust. I never felt any real affection or love from her. Now that I think about it, I can't remember her ever saying she loved me. It was not a term used in our relationship. Looking back, there never was a relationship. We just went through the motions. I had been living in an ice castle and never realized it. My head was so far up my ass that I needed a good bitch slap to get it out.
She never wanted slow passionate love making. She didn't want fore play. She wanted it hard and raw. The animalistic sex was plentiful. I often longed for the emotional intimacy she denied me. Buket never gave me a hug or a cuddle. She used my body and I used hers. The difference being that I loved her. She never loved me.
I was able to take care of her needs, but not a lot of her wants. I went into some serious debt trying. we ate out so much my oven was dusty. I'm a high school teacher. I make a decent living, but I'll never be rich. I did my best. There was no way I could hang with the country club set. It was not enough for her. The greedy bitch! When I met her four years ago, she was a nanny. I was immediately impressed with her beauty and intelligence. She was exotic and independent. I later discovered that what I thought was independence was really a manifestation of her self centered manipulating personality.
From the beginning, she was egotistical and selfish. I always saw more good in her than actually existed. I felt like a moth that was irresistibly drawn to the flame that would kill him. Don't ask me why. I should have kicked her ass to the curb after the first week I met her. I guess I wanted to, needed to see the good in her. Maybe, I was thinking with the wrong head. I wish there had been a way for me to keep the pussy and get rid of her.
So, the obvious question is why I put up with her manipulating, callous and deceitful ways for so long? Until recently, I never thought of myself as a wimp. Looking back, I guess I was. Somehow, I thought of my patience and tolerance as strength.
I promised her father, in Turkey, that I would provide for and protect his daughter. It was important to me that I kept my word. I've always thought that he was a good and honorable man who had no idea who is daughter really is.
I was raising twin sons from a previous disaster called a marriage and did not want to be divorced again. I was determined to make my train wreck of a relationship work. When I met Buket, all I wanted was a home and a woman to come home to more than anything. I guess I saw what I wanted to see until I had no choice.
"I don't want to argue, Ben. It's over between us. You know that." She said, as she dressed to leave our house on a recent Friday night." I need to be with my friends.
"You mean your boy friend I heard most of your conversation on the phone this morning. If he calls my house again, I will throw you and your phone out of the window."
"Don't get jealous. You know we can't stay together."
"I am not jealous. You said you wanted to pursue your own life four months ago. Why are you still here?" You being here does not allow me to get on with my life. My patience with you is finished. I have been tested enough.
"Don't worry, I'll be gone soon."
She looked stunning. Her full red lips, perfume and sexy black dress left little to the imagination. She was going to meet another man and didn't care that I knew about it. I had always been gentle and kind to her, but that was about to change. His disrespect for me and my sons was intolerable. I knew that I still cared a little about her. I also knew that I had reached my limit. Buket and her boy friend were going to find out that there would be a price to pay for their treachery and disrespect. My anger grew as I watched her.
"What has gotten into you? What did I do to deserve this treatment? Did you think I was going to tolerate this crap! Your social life has always been more important than your husband? I have put up with your shit for too long. You've been lying to me for a long time. I know what you've been doing. Tonight, I can't deny it any more. You treat me and my sons like crap."
"You really bank on the promise I made to your father that I would protect you from harm. Somehow, my sense of honor and love for you has been turned against me. You have never helped pay a single bill. I supported you as you struggled to get your MBA and through a number of nothing jobs. Now that you've got yourself a big time job in an investment bank, I'm not good enough for you. Is that it?" I could feel my guts boiling.
"I hate being around your bastard sons. I hate it every time I see them. Every time you wrote a child support check, I wanted to puke. Now they are here and I don't want to be their mother. Besides, you have no sophistication. You're just a simple man who wants a simple life. I need more than you can give." She said, with an indifference and coldness that could not be ignored. She really thought she was somehow superior to me.
"Bitch, My sons are not bastards and if you are wise, you will not call them that name again. You have one week from today to get your stuff out of my house. If you and your possessions are not gone at that time, I will put all of it in the garbage. After next Friday, you will not be allowed in my house. I will no longer be held captive by the promise that I made to your father. We are finished! I can't stand the sight of you."
I was glad that my sons were with my sister for a couple of weeks. They didn't need to be exposed to her another second. I felt ashamed and embarrassed that I ever exposed them to the monster I was looking at.
She looked shocked. She was beginning to realize that I had changed. I was not going to take care of her needs any more. My stomach felt twisted. It felt like I had been gun shot. I hated myself for still feeling anything for her. I wanted to hurt her. At the same time, I grieved for the love that never was, except in my mind.
Despite my complete hatred of what she was doing and who she really was, I felt a strange bond with her. It wasn't love. That had been dying slowly for a long time. I felt sorry for her, even though she only deserved my contempt. I truly believed she would end up the victim of her own karma. Her treachery deserved none of my sympathy.
"I've had enough of your disrespect. And when did you get to be the queen? I'd just like to know why do you hate them and me so much? You think that you're superior to me, to us. In fact you're a two bit slut who doesn't deserve to breathe the same air as myself or my sons, bitch."
"Their whore of a mother dumped them on you and you dumped them on me. You never have any money. You spend all of your time and income on them. I don't hate you. I don't know how I feel about you. Some part of me still cares about you. But, I don't love you, Ben. I need the finer things in life. I deserve that. I never should have married a man with children. I need a man who can give me his full attention." She said, picking up her purse. "The only reason I married you was to get a green card and live rent free until I could arrange my life and when I needed your dick or anything else, you always said yes. Sorry dear." She said, mockingly.
She had no idea that I was recording the conversation.
"You've got a lot of nerve calling somebody a whore. You are more of a whore than my ex ever was. I can't remember you ever trying to be in their lives. You haven't been a wife and definitely not a mother. The days of obliging you are over. From now on, you can take care of yourself. You are as plastic as the fancy cars and restaurants that you love so much. You knew from the beginning my ex left me in a pile of debt. I pay the mortgage, buy the food and every thing else. Did you never try to help me? Did you?" I said, raising my voice. "All you have done since I married you was spend my money. Why did you really marry me?" I didn't really expect an answer. "I don't have a lot of cash because I have paid your bills. You have never contributed one cent to this household. Have you ever been denied anything that you needed since we've been together?"
"You have served your purpose. In a short while, I will have my green card. I have my education and now a great profession. I don't need you any more, sorry. I know that's cold. It's the way things are. I might miss your love making a little, but not much. His cock is bigger than yours." She was smiling.
What was that about? She was driving the nail deeper. It took all of my martial arts training not to lash out at her. I wanted to wring her neck and throw her in the street. I decided not to let her bait me.
"Did you ever love me?"
She looked at me with an evil grin, but didn't answer. I could tell she didn't want to set me off before she was ready to go. The look on her face was my answer. Then, I heard a car horn blow in front of my door.
.... There is more of this story ...