Will I ever find someone to love?
Someone to care for?
To devote my life to and to have children with?
In my 17 years of life this has been the most difficult thing for me, I know that I could find someone to be with; and love might grow in time, but will I ever meet that woman that I can't be without? That woman that I would give everything in the world to meet just once... or is it my fate to go through life without someone to hold and to talk to? Or to share my soul with? I really wish that I could find that girl, alas life is an uncaring wench that beats your ass so far into the ground that you doubt you can crawl back up. But what do we do? We go on... we say that eventually it will come. With my experience I cannot say that I have ever seen someone that is in love, truly and wholeheartedly in love.
I have seen my share of couples, and I don't doubt that there is such a thing as true love. But am I one of the lucky ones that gets to experience it? Or am I just a normal guy destined to have a normal and unsatisfying relationship?
Who am I to want something as beautiful as love?
Who am I to question the gods? Me I'm just Travis, I wish for many things and I hope that many of them come true; however I don't think that anyone in this world should be lonely.
Being lonely and without someone with you is heart wrenching.
It makes you doubt why you exist when you have no one to love, no one that truly appreciates every aspect of you.
I'm not interested in a relationship with a girl that I cannot love, I'm not interested in women just because of their bodies; I'm not saying I don't lust after women, but I know the difference between love and lust. I would like to meet a woman that I could have fun talking to, and would like to talk to me too. A woman that has a nice personality and that has common interests, a cute girl, not hot, and not ugly.
I would like to meet a girl that I can truly connect to on a totally different level, again I am starting to doubt that I will be one of those lucky ones. It hurts, it really hurts, not physically, but emotionally it's like getting stabbed in the heart.
Do I want to go on if that is the life I will live? The answer is no... if I cannot find a woman like that, then I have no reason to exist, at least that is how I feel. Hopefully one of these days I will meet the girl for me, we'll find a way to be together and live our lives with one another. But as the months turn into years my hope wanes.
Some people might feel the same way as I and some others might think I'm an idiot to some degree, for not seeing something they think is obvious. But I am me and you are you so I will politely say lay off. I guess the point is that you might have found your loved one early in your life and not have had to feel like this.
Me, I'm only 17 so I shouldn't have much to complain about right? Well you'd be wrong. It sucks when you wake up in the morning by yourself knowing that today was going to be the same as always. You would be alone.
True Story /