Chapter 19: Experimental Therapy under the Gun

The small car careened along the rocky trail, struggling to keep pace with the more mobile motorcycle. Dust was everywhere, obscuring everything, coating their clothing and making them cough. "Tell her how she can read emotions from the outer rim—Ouch—of people's auras," Cate suggested, bouncing off the roof as she strained to hold herself upright.

"Already covered," Alex informed her as he held himself in place. "Right now I'm leaving it ... up to the girls back in Carbondale to explain."

"How the hell can she concentrate—Ooph—on talking while she's driving through this mess?"

"I guess she's used to it," Alex guessed.

"Don't worry, I'll get you there, but it's not going to be easy," Gail assured them. She'd volunteered to drive, having trained in extreme driving during her Police Department days. It was a skill which certainly came in handy then. "It'll be easier on the way back, but I've got to keep up or we risk losing her."

"Forget that shit," Cate opined. "Let her get lost. You and Alex can communicate with her wherever she goes, anyway."

Neither one reacted to Cate's statement, but both realized this was more a test than simply careless aggressive driving. Gini wanted to see how they'd handle the rough environment. As such, they didn't want to risk whether she'd even respond if they lost her.

"I'll say this, though, I'm sure glad I ... peed before we left." Cate tried unsuccessfully to brace herself in the back seat beside Robin, who strangely didn't seem as bothered by the chaotic drive as the rest were.

They'd turned off the highway a short distance from Billy D's place, heading into the higher desert regions nearby. But that had taken them completely off the established roads. The only thing that made the rough ground they crossed manageable was the scattered signs of old motorcycle tracks, but even those were obscured by the dust her bike kicked up.

'I'd think you'd have a Harley, ' Alex suggested, curious about Gini's choice in bikes. 'Wouldn't a bigger bike be better in this terrain? After all, you're certainly big enough to handle a motorcycle that large.'

'Ha, don't insult me! A Harley is like a Cadillac, it turns like an aircraft carrier. It's what you ride if you want to impress your friends. I've got enough strength for both me and the bike. What I'm interested in is the responsiveness of these little Japanese bikes.'

'Yeah, but aren't they more likely to clog and fail from the elements?'

'Ah, so the young one isn't so sheltered after all.' Gail's telepathic voice didn't convey the jostling they were all coping with, instead sounding calm and collected. Despite speaking telepathically, Alex wasn't sure his 'voice' was coming across quite as well. 'I take it you didn't get a good look at my bike. It's a specially constructed model, made for high speed back country racing. It's designed to stand up to abuse, and it's got amazing shocks. But you're right, I spend hours after every trip stripping and cleaning all my parts. The dust gets into everything, and I can't afford to have my machine fail on me. It's a long walk to purchase replacement parts.'

'Speaking of dust getting into everything, at least you're in the lead. You're kicking up enough grit we can't see a thing, and I'm not quite as handy at stripping third hand cars. You may have to drive us out so we can call Triple A.'

'The hell with that, ' Gini responded with a laugh. 'There's no way Triple A could ever get back here.'

Alex just groaned as the right tire went airborne momentarily, only to crash back to the earth a moment later, knocking them around that much harder. He hoped his own shocks survived this trip. He figured if they didn't, they might be able to make it out without them, but it would mean another several days stuck out here in the desert.

'Is it much farther? Mind you, I'm only asking because I haven't been able to see the hills for a long time due to the dust.'

'No, it isn't much farther. I picked this spot because it was relatively easy to reach, ' Gini responded. Alex almost cursed at that response, but managed to bite his tongue, although that wasn't his plan as much as his being thrown against the side of the car once more.

They managed to see a dim red glow in the dust ahead of them, so Gail applied her brakes. Seeing Gini sitting ahead of them, Gail drove around to park beside her so they wouldn't block her in, as if you could actually do so in the middle of the open desert.

Everyone took a few moments to get settled before they attempted to climb out of the car, and when they did they found the doors hard to open because of the jostling the old car had undergone. When they climbed out, Gini was wordlessly smiling at their discomfort, but Gail didn't seem any less smug.

"You did well for yourself, Gail. I'm not sure you'd survive out here for long, but you managed to do yourself justice."

"I was never trained to live like a flea clinging to the back of an ass," Gail shot back. "Put me in the inner-city and I can go toe to toe with the best of them. But I still prefer flushing toilets and a comfortable bed to hold my girlfriend at night after I'm finished."

"There is that," Gini conceded, looking Gail up and down. "I don't have that worry. If I did, I'd have lost him or her a long, long time ago," she admitted resignedly.

"This is where you live?" Cate asked, glancing around in disbelief. All there was, nestled against the face of a cliff, was a single small tent, a couple cases wedged in position, and what looked like a folding shovel marking a latrine off to one side. Cate felt herself shivering as she considered living like this for any period of time. She'd thought she'd been 'roughing it' traveling across country by car for the past several weeks.

"This is it. And actually, I consider this more luxury than I really need. I'd be just as happy sleeping on the ground, lodged against the rocks."

"Ah, you've got a nice clean stream running beside you coming from the hill above us," Robin observed, taking in what the rest of them missed. "You're also sheltered from the afternoon sun, and this dip just before the cliff wall means you don't have to worry about the wind."

"Ah, a woman after my own heart," Gini said with clear admiration in her voice. "You get what I'm doing here."

"Aye, I can see it. But I choose to endure this only for short periods, as a balance against the distractions of everyday life. I'm not sure I understand your wanting to live like this all the time."

"Yeah, well, I figure if I'm going to stay here much longer I'll put up a little cabin, just so it'll be more secure in a storm. I'll just use it as a home base to store my supplies if I do, since I like to wander the countryside."

"Have you observed many animals nearby?" Robin asked.

"Yeah, how do you think I survive out here so long?" Gini responded with a question of her own. Robin looked horrified.

"You do realize there's only a limited amount of livestock here, and that if you kill too many animals, you won't be able to fend for yourself anymore. This is a very delicate ecosystem."

"Yeah, don't get your panties in a bunch. I'm careful, and I make sure I spread out my kills when I do take something." Gini sounded a little defensive at someone calling her survival skills into question.

"So do you have someplace we can work?" Alex asked. "We'll have to work out how we'll do this. I don't know whether it will be easier to work sitting up or lying down, but I suspect it'll take a while, so I'd figure on resting."

Gail simply shook her head at this. She'd been with Alex when he'd treated the people at the Brooke center, and he hadn't been able to do anything for the mTBI patients. Yeah, they'd been impressed, but he'd told them it was only a temporary fix, and that the energy applied didn't fix anything, just cleared their minds temporarily making them operate more efficiently, but it wouldn't last long. While he may be able to make her feel more in control of her life, the effects would be short term, and then she'd be back in the same position. That seemed crueler to inflict on someone than simply letting them deal with their problems themselves. However, she knew better than to question Alex's approach, especially in front of his newest followers.

"The tent's the best bet," Gini suggested. "If you have any blankets or jackets you'll probably need them, as the tent only has the basics in it."

"Gail, see if you can find the blanket in the back. I'll bring in the cooler with Alex's food," Cate said as Alex followed Gini to the smallish tent.

"So, what kind of a name is 'Gini'?" he asked. "Short for Virginia, or something?"

"Or something," Gini answered. "Actually it's short for Genevieve, which I got from my Italian grandfather. I was never fond of the name, so I just shortened it. It's unique, direct and easy to call out if you're in trouble and having difficulty speaking, so it's ideal for the kinds of things I do," she said as she unzipped the tent and climbed in. Alex climbed in after her.

The inside of the tent was as sparse as the outside, but it was also as carefully laid out. There were supplies around the edges, where they could be quickly accessed, but there were no personal effects aside from a dream catcher hanging from the ceiling, another large feather likewise suspended, and a dangling claw of some kind. He did notice a small photo album among other books under the sleeping bag, which he assumed contained her few personal photos. At least she had a good collection of reading material.

"So what are you planning on doing?" she asked Alex guardedly as Cate came in, already making the little tent more crowded than was comfortable. Cate dragged her cooler in with her. "I don't think I need any more 'talk therapy', and the doctors said they couldn't do anything for me medically."

"No, I'm going to take a different approach. While I was in San Antonio with Caity we discussed mTBI cases, which I suspect you have, and she laid out some ideas I'd like to try. But first I'd just like to give your brain a simple little energy bath. It won't hurt and it should allow you to think more clearly, which should help."

"Well, if it won't do any damage, OK. But if you try to fuck with my head you won't like how it ends," she warned him. "But yeah, they classify my injury as TBI, though they said it was probably more psychological than actual combat injuries."

"OK, I've been warned. I don't think the difference between head injuries and 'battle fatigue' will affect how I plan to treat it. Now just sit and relax," Alex said, as he moved behind her and put his hands against the sides of her head.

"Gail, I think you're needed in here," Cate called out. She recognized there wasn't room for them all, so she climbed back out, heading for the car where she was planning on catching some Z's.

"I think she's setting up a peripheral guard," Robin teased. "I'll head in. I got a quick overview on what to look for, and I can talk to Allison and Liv, so they'll cover anything I don't know yet. Don't worry about us."

"Just make sure to keep an eye on Alex. If he tries too much, he's likely to get weak fast, and you'll need to have food ready, otherwise he'll be useless for the next several hours," Cate warned as she headed for the car, though she stopped to admire Gini's motorcycle before she did. It was indeed one sexy little vehicle, even as covered in dust as it was.

Robin scampered quickly into the open tent, making sure to zip the opening closed to keep the drifting dust out. She observed what Alex had already started on, nodding that he seemed to be applying a good overall flow as she got her water bottles out. She tossed him some of her beef jerky, thinking it would serve him better than eating a candy bar after he got in trouble.

Gini was surprised when Alex stopped whatever he was doing almost immediately, and frankly, she didn't think he'd actually done anything. He hadn't even touched her, and he hadn't been there long enough to have accomplished anything. For as powerful as she could both see and feel him to be, she wondered if he was just humoring her.

"How do you feel?" he asked, sitting in front of her again, just enough to the side so Robin could get a clear view of her.

Gini cocked her head considering his question. She sat still for a second and then shook her head, as if unsure of her response.

"Shit, what the fuck did you do to me?" she asked, turning to regard him, only having to look away once again. "My head is clearer than it's been in a long time. I feel like I did when I was a kid back in Boot Camp."

"It's temporary, but it should last long enough for you to help with your own treatment. I need you to be at your best. Now, this is where it gets interesting, and where it's going to take a long time. I'm going to ask you to simply run through your memories and think about a whole variety of different things. What I'm looking for are either positive or negative memories. But I'm especially interested when you hit anything that brings up memories of the war. So anything that causes a panic response, or which makes you think you're back in Afghanistan, let me know immediately, OK?" Gini simply nodded so he continued.

"When you have a positive thought, just hold up your index finger. It doesn't matter when it occurs, or what you're thinking. If we're asleep, just kick me and I'll look to see what you're trying to tell me. Don't bother to tell me what you're thinking, as the act of trying to put it into words might cause your brain to shift focus."

"You're going to be here overnight?" she asked guardedly.

"Oh, yes. I suspect we may be here for quite a few days. If you don't have enough supplies for us, we may have to let Gail take your bike to get more, but to do that you'll have to promise not to kill me until she gets back, OK?" Alex teased.

She grinned, his off-beat sense of humor appealing to her. This was the kind of thing they'd teased each other with in the Army.

"Now, if you have a negative thought, hold up your second finger, and if you have a combat related memory, especially a negative memory which conjures up a fight or flight response, hold your whole palm open. Those are going to be our bread and butter. That's what I'm here to try to cope with."

"This doesn't sound like any medically approved treatment I've ever heard of," Gini warily told him.

"Actually, it was suggested to me by Caity, and she claimed it was based on the latest research and has been borne out by experience, but it's very hard to get without specialized treatment."

"Oh, sure, I've had doctors ask me to visualize things before, but usually they'd describe something then ask me how I felt about it, which didn't seem to do much besides entertain the shrink. Somehow I don't think you're doing the same thing."

"Oh, I'm not," Alex responded, before he turned to Robin. "Say, this jerky is actually fairly good. It's tough, but it's got a unique taste. What is it?"

"It's bear meat. Try this one, it's snake. You might find it more palatable, as it's tenderer than the bear. And don't forget to keep drinking. It's easy to dehydrate out here in the desert, even if you don't think you're exposed," she instructed.

Gini wordless raised her index finger, so Alex leaned over and placed his hand near her head for a second.

"Hey, that's nice. I'll have to try to have more of those."

"That's the whole idea," Alex told her.

"So what happens when I have a negative thought? You smack me upside the head?"

"Hey, I could never hit someone as pretty as you, 'cause if I did you'd likely beat the crap out of me. No, I'll apply a similar approach."

Curious, Gini raised her second finger.

"Is that real, or are you testing me?" Alex asked. Before she could respond Robin did.

"It looks like pure curiosity. I don't know how to read individual thoughts, but it doesn't look like she's being straightforward."

"Damn, human lie detectors," Gini said, smiling.

"There's no way to use your ability to read minds, but you can use them to figure out what someone's underlying motives are, just like you did," Alex told her. "You're learning quite well."

"Well, don't congratulate me too soon. It was Alison who told me what it meant."

"Still, you're getting the hang of this pretty quickly. Tell Alison hi for me, will you," he replied with his own smile.

"She says 'hi', and that she's glad someone is including her in your newest experiment."

Alex simply replied by sticking his tongue out at her, but just then Gini held up her second finger again. This time, instead of questioning her, Alex held his hand near her head, where she couldn't see it, after having spoken briefly to Robin telepathically.

"Whoa? That's not what I was expecting. What the hell did you do to me? It feels like I just lost a dozen IQ points," Gini complained.

"Just wait until you have a flashback," Alex warned her as he settled back, reaching for the nearby water bottle. This was going to be a long process. Since it had never been tried before, he had no idea how long it would take, or even whether it would work or not, but it was worth trying. He also knew that Caity and Lists would be anxious to hear how well it worked, and it was the only way he could think of improving Gini's life. He just couldn't bear the idea of her living the rest of her life in isolation, hiding from the rest of humanity.

"OW!"

Robin sat upright, not knowing what was happening. She'd learned over the years to sleep lightly, rousing at the most subtle of environmental changes, but she hadn't been awakened before Alex had cried out. As she regarded him, he was already reaching up to Gini's head.

'Are you sure you should be doing that?' Robin asked, worried about what he appeared to be doing.

'No, I'm not sure about what I'm doing, but it's the only way I can see to achieve what I need to do. But make sure you watch me. I need to do this in a very controlled manner so I don't inflict any damage. Let me know if I drain too much from any one area, and watch the surrounding tissue. We don't need any collateral damage here.'

That response, while hardly comforting, reassured her. Gini never said anything, but Robin could see the wild look she'd had in her eyes was quickly fading, and now she looked much calmer.

"Thanks. I was just about to slit your throat when I remember your finger symbol. Then I had to make sure you were awake, so to make sure you weren't really an Al Qaeda member, I kicked you a little harder than I really needed to."

"While I can understand the sentiment, next time, don't try to incapacitate me quite so much. I'm hardly able to hold my hand up to do the procedure."

"Hey, don't whine. You only need to hold it up for a second. If you really were an insurgent, a simple kick like that wouldn't likely have stopped you, and I'd have given you enough time to either shoot me or to set off an explosive. I figure I must be doing better already."

"Well, I can see why your Army buddies stopped sleeping with you, then," Alex responded. "It's hardly the ideal way to cap a romantic interlude."