Chapter 2: June 18, 1978

You haunt my dreams.
You make me fantasize;
all your moves, I’ve got them memorized.
Under your spell, you got me hypnotized.
My body aches to make you satisfied.

Sex Appeal - Robert Palmer

Only a few moments later for I saw Aunt Susan leading Mom out into the corridor. Mom was her cool, calm, collected self. I stood up as they approached.

“You have a beautiful house, Susan,” said Mom.

“Thank you, Brenda. How is your cabin?”

“Very nice,” replied Mom. “We really enjoy being here.”

“Shall we have a seat?” suggested Aunt Susan. I held my chair out from Mom and turned to assist Aunt Susan before I sat down myself. “Thank you. He’s a nice young man.”

“Yes, he is,” replied Mom.

We sat in silence for several moments before I finally realized that Aunt Susan was waiting for me to speak. I felt my face heat up. I looked up to see Aunt Susan smile at me and nod her head.

“Mom, I want to apologize,” I said hastily. “I didn’t mean to barge in on you and Pop. I didn’t mean to stay, but I just froze. I’m sorry.”

Mom’s face showed shock for half a second before quickly return to her normal expression. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

“This is not something we should be discussing here,” stated Mom calmly, a little too calmly from my viewpoint. Mom was upset, but I didn’t know if she was upset about what I saw or that I brought it up in front of Aunt Susan.

“I beg your pardon,” said Aunt Susan. “I don’t know what happened to my manners. Brenda, can I offer you some iced tea?”

Mom opened her mouth and, for second, I thought she was going to refuse. However, her southern upbringing came through.

“I’d be delighted to have a glass,” said Mom.

“Stephan, would you be a gentleman and get us two glasses of iced tea from the kitchen?” asked Aunt Susan. “I will take a little slice of lemon in mine. There is Coke in the refrigerator, if you’d like one.”

“Thank you, but I’ll have water, if you don’t mind,” I said as I stood up. “I’ll be right back.”

I walked into Aunt Susan’s kitchen. I went looking to find the glasses, sugar, and spoons right away. After finding them, I got the tea from the refrigerator. As I started to pour the iced tea into the glasses, I heard Mom’s and Aunt Susan’s voices coming through the open window.

“Brenda, your son was upset,” I heard Aunt Susan say.

“I know,” said Mom. “I was surprised that he opened up, but this is still a family matter.”

“I understand,” said Aunt Susan, “but he has apologized to you here. You should talk to him.”

Mom didn’t say anything for a while. She finally said with a sigh, “I will as soon as he comes out. Roman is so much easier to talk to.”

“Why?” asked Aunt Susan.

“Roman is outgoing, while Steve is introverted. Roman confides in me. Steve, on the other hand, internalizes everything. I’ve always been there for my boys, but Steve just doesn’t talk to me.”

“Now would be a good time to start,” stated Aunt Susan. “Try to get him to open up.”

I took this is my cue to head back out to the courtyard. Grasping the two iced teas, I walked back out. I saw Mom straightened and tense up as I walked through the door. I set the glasses down in front of the two women with their thanks and sat back down.

“I’m really sorry, Mom. I didn’t mean to spy on you and Pop. I just froze in the doorway.”

“I understand,” said Mom. “Your father and I thought we would have more time before any of you kids came back to the cabin.”

“I’m ... I’m sorry about the ... mess I made,” I said, shamefacedly.

“Nothing that wasn’t easily cleaned up,” stated Mom.

“Oh, I...” My voice trailed off in embarrassment.

“It’s all right, Steve,” said Mom gently. “It’s just one of those things that happen. There’s no reason to be embarrassed.”

I pushed on my embarrassment and straightened up my shoulders. Looking my mother in the eye, I pasted on a smile and said, “Yes, ma’am.”

Mom stood up and touched my cheek.

“I’m so glad we had this talk,” she said to me. “I’m headed back down to the clubhouse. Dinner is in about ten minutes. I’ll see you there.”

Having said that, Mom took her leave of Aunt Susan and headed back towards the clubhouse. I glanced over at Aunt Susan. Her eyes were wide open and her mouth was parted with a look of total disbelief on her face. She looked over at me and then did a quick shake of her head as if to dispel her shock.

“My deepest apologies, Stephan ... or is it Steve?” apologized Aunt Susan.

“I’ve got four relatives name Stephan,” I told her. “Big Stephan is my uncle. Junior is his son. Little Stephan is a cousin and I became Steve.”

“What do you like?”

“Well, I do like it when you call me Stephan, but everyone else knows me as Steve.”

“But who are you?” asked Aunt Susan pointedly.

“I’m...” I stopped speaking as I realized that Aunt Susan was not just asking me what I wanted to be called, but if I knew who I really was. I knew I was a nudist, a soon-to-be freshman, the middle child of Antoni and Brenda Zaworski... , but I felt that Aunt Susan’s question was asking something more of me.

“Come,” ordered Aunt Susan, standing up. “We need to walk down to the clubhouse for dinner.”

As we headed down the road towards the clubhouse, I asked Aunt Susan, “Why did you apologize to me?”

She looked at me and said, “For my bad manners.”

“I ... I don’t understand.”

“I was talking to your mother while you were getting the iced teas,” said Aunt Susan. “She indicated to me that she was going to talk to you about what happened. I’m sorry, but I was a little shocked by her conversation, or lack thereof, and I let it show.”

“That was a big discussion for us,” I said. “I like talking with you. Can we talk more?”

“Not all the time,” laughed Aunt Susan. “You’re here with your family to have fun and relax. I have the camp to run and other people to see, but we can talk from time to time.”

“I’d like that.”

We walked in silence to the clubhouse. Before we entered, I stopped Aunt Susan and turned to face her.

“I’d like to be Stephan Zaworski,” I told her.

Aunt Susan smiled and nodded in approval. She reached out with both hands to grasp me by my shoulders.

“Now comes the hard part,” said Aunt Susan. “Don’t answer ... just think about it. Who is Stephan Zaworski?”

The next four days passed quickly, despite the fact that I kept thinking about Aunt Susan’s question. The quick and simple answer was that I was Stephan Zaworski. However, I know Aunt Susan would not be satisfied with that answer. I really did not want to disappoint her.

I still had fun swimming, playing Marco Polo, volleyball, shuffleboard, and all the other activities available at camp. I goofed around with my family, the Hughes, and a couple of the families that were there. I laid out in the sun and worked on my tan. I didn’t burn easily like some people, but I still had to be careful.

Dad usually cooked dinner, taking pleasure in preparing a home-cooked meal without the frantic rush and pressure he was used to. I usually helped him out, preparing fruits and vegetables under his direction. The first night was awkward, but, without saying a word, Pop gave me a smile and ruffled my hair to let me know that everything was okay between us.

I did talk to Aunt Susan now and then, but we did not discuss that last question. She asked me to talk about my school and what I like best about her camp. She told me about her two boys and about their growing up. I learned her son, Kirk, had a crush on a girl in the eighth grade, but never asked her out as he was too scared. He found out much later that the girl really, really wanted him to ask her out.

I learned a lot little things from these talks. Things I never learned from Roman. Things like don’t be afraid to ask a girl out, but don’t ask out someone else’s girlfriend. Watch out for girls on the rebound (I had never heard that term before). When on a date, focus on the girl.

I lost enough for my shyness asked Aunt Susan about sex. Some of her answers shocked me, but I felt she tried to give me honest explanations. I learned that one does not talk or brag about his affairs (I actually use the word ‘conquests’ at which point Aunt Susan pointed out that my vocabulary definitely needed improvement). I also learned, with a very red face, about protection and how was my responsibility.

Of course, Aunt Susan had asked me some embarrassing questions. The most embarrassing was about masturbation. It was Thursday morning and Aunt Susan had joined me down at the lake to sunbathe. The red on my face was not caused by the sun.

“Stephan, everybody masturbates,” she said when I didn’t answer her after several minutes of silence. “Even I do so. It’s a normal thing to do to relieve stress and tension.”

“Then why do we have to talk about it?” I asked sullenly.

“It’s a part of everyone’s sexual makeup,” stated Aunt Susan. “I’m trying to make you see that you don’t have to be embarrassed to talk about. It’ll give you some perspective for when you have children.”

I snorted on that thought and said, “How did your masturbation talks go with Kirk and Doug?”

“About like this,” replied Aunt Susan. “Of course, I was their mother. I’m sure they had fantasies about me that they jerked off to just like you have had about your mother.”

“How did you... ?” I started to say in shock before I clamped my mouth shut tight.

The past four days had been rough on me. I had erotic dreams about Mom every night and woke up every morning with a painful woody. I was luckily an early riser (I like sunrises) and managed to get into the bathroom almost unnoticed. Mom, being a nurse, woke up, but, as soon as she saw it was me, rolled over and went back to sleep. Her looking at me heading towards the bathroom really didn’t help matters ... it just made it harder in more ways than one.

What was worse was that my normal fantasies of Aunt Susan, Kara and Gina Coulter, or a couple other hot girls I’d met at the camp could not get me off. Not even my favorites, like Racquel Welsh in a poncho or Sophia Loren in a low cut blouse, worked.

However, I felt hot when I thought of Mom with come running down her legs. I tingled all over, and increased the pace of stroking my dick when I pictured Mom approaching me as I sat on the toilet. She was on her hands and knees with her breasts swaying back and forth as she crawled towards me. It was the image of her look of lust and desire on her face that caused my balls to tighten and pushed me over the edge. During the past four days, I swear I climaxed as hard as I ever had filling up the wadded Kleenex in my hand.

“Stephan, it’s okay,” said Aunt Susan soothingly. “You saw a powerful sexual image that has fueled your sexual fantasies. Time will diminish it, along with other fantasies and real experiences you will have.”

“It ... It was her look in the cabin that ... that I get excited about the most,” I said.

“You mentioned her look before,” said Aunt Susan. “What was...”

Aunt Susan stopped talking and I glanced up to see that she was looking towards the lake. I looked over in the direction she was staring at and saw Mom coming out of the lake up the brick steps. Mom’s slicked back hair even darker wet and water dripped off her breasts and body. The coldness of the water had caused her nipples to harden into knobs that seem to point straight at me.

Mom was walking straight towards us and I could feel my dick stiffened up to its full length. Embarrassed, I hid my hard-on the only way I knew how. I flipped over onto my stomach.

“Good morning, Brenda,” greeted Aunt Susan.

“Good morning. How are you today?”

“I’m doing well, and yourself?”

“I love a brisk swim in the morning,” said Mom. “It’s so invigorating. I came over to ask you if you will join us for dinner. Anton is fixing baranina.”

“Baranina?”

“Polish roast lamb,” clarified Mom. “We would be delighted if you could join us at six.”

“I’d be honored,” said Aunt Susan. “Can I bring anything?”

“Not a thing,” said Mom.

“Can I, at least, bring you a nice Cabernet?”

Mom smiled and said, “That would be nice. Steve, please make sure you use your sunscreen.”

“Yes, Mom.”

“We’ll see about that six,” said Mom before she left.

“How are things between you and your mother?” asked Aunt Susan.

“A little strange,” I admitted. “She seems ... tense? ... around me.”

“What about that look she gave you?”

“In the cabin, she ... uh ... started towards me. The look on her face, it was...” I stopped because I wasn’t sure I wanted to express it in words.

“What was the look, Stephan?” asked Aunt Susan.

“Uh ... desire ... um ... wanting ... I’m not really sure,” I said.

“Oh, she did not look angry or upset?”

“Nothing like that,” I said quickly. “After I ... uh ... climaxed, I ... uh ... I hate to say that I ran away.”

“Oh,” exclaimed Aunt Susan knowingly.

“What?”

“At the time, your mother was feeling passionate, excited, even lustful,” explained Aunt Susan. “Remember she is a woman first and your mother second. Mothers can be attracted to sons just the same as sons can be attracted to their mothers. Your mother seemed to of been caught up in the moment and acted on impulse. Do you understand?”

“I think so,” I said hesitantly. “You’re saying she wasn’t thinking straight.”

“Correct, but when you ran away, she felt rejected,” stated Aunt Susan. “Not as your mother, but rejected as a woman. She felt that you did not desire her.”

“Oh,” I said ... then I got it. “OH! But I climaxed when I saw that look.”

“Yes, but does she know that?” asked Aunt Susan. “Is it possible she thought that you climaxed just because you watched your parents having sex?”

“I suppose so,” I answered, scratching my ear. “What can I do?”

“What do you think you should do?”

“Make her feel wanted?” I suggested.

“You’re learning,” said Aunt Susan smilingly, “but remember she’s an adult. Think about what you are going to do and don’t act impulsively.”