Chapter 1

Fifty-year-old Alex Carpenter had spent a rough two years mourning the death of his wife Kirsty, his wife of 28 years. She had committed suicide, leaving no note explaining her actions, which made things harder to accept. He was the one who found her on their bed with a paper bag duct taped around her head. He knew right away that she was gone, and quietly held her in silence for hours. She was his true love ever since meeting in Jr High school.

They had brought three children into the world. Ginger was the oldest at twenty-five, while Lexie and her twin brother Adam were a few months past eighteen. Lexie and Ginger had their own apartments located in the same city, where he lived, and Adam was off to college in another state. His kids had been very supportive after Kirsty's death, but Alex knew they had their own lives to lead, and didn't want them to spend too much time trying to mend his crushed spirits. Friends had also tried to help, though in most cases he had not been very receptive. He spent every nights alone, needing female comfort, but not sure if he was ready. He had slowly sorted through Kirsty's things, although he often found it difficult to continue.

He knew Kirsty's greatest worry had been how well he could live without her. And she was right, but perhaps not for the reasons she thought. Kirsty viewed herself as the person that managed the house. She was the operations director, a very practical role that she thought everyone would miss if she was ever gone. And they did. Everyone had roles around the house, and each one knew what they had to do to keep things going. Alex fixed things and earned most of the money to buy things, Kirsty thought of all the practical stuff, but even that now she was gone, that's not the biggest reason they missed her. All the practical things she did seemed easy with system of a list of tasks, knowing who was going to do them, when they are going to be done, and had an agreement from her family that they will be done.

What they really missed the most was her female design input, her carefree and positive view of the world, her caring nature, and mostly her selflessness as a mother, wife, and a very devoted lover. Now it seemed so obvious to Alex that those many things often went without thanks or show of appreciation.

Since her passing, Alex's life felt empty. For several months after her passing, he could not sleep in their bed. Instead, he slept on the sofa, holding onto her pillow for comfort. Living in their home after his wife's death was difficult, but he had added several modifications to the three-bedroom house since moving in several years after their wedding, and did not want to sell it. The central air unit was fairly new, and he had the outside painted weeks prior to her passing. The large backyard was surrounded by a high privacy fence, and Alex had installed a four-person Jacuzzi when the kids were young.

Things were good in his life for the most part, except for being alone. His job was going well, and he had built a solid reputation. Since he always had an interest in law enforcement, he was able to do something he enjoyed, despite the occasional dangers. He did not have any real hobbies or interest besides being an avid bowler, which he made time for when possible.