Chapter 2

I put the letter down. I would read it many times over the years.

Time seemed no longer very important. When I called the Lawyer about the divorce he berated me at being gone so long. Just how long had I been gone?

I called home. No answer. I called Mom and Dad. The recording said the number was no longer in service. I tried Jim's old number, trying to get his Mom or Dad. I got the same recording; the number was no longer in service.

I started driving home. When I got there the house was empty. There was a note pinned to the door. I noticed the 'For Sale' sign out front.

I read the note. "JD, if you are reading this, there are a lot of things you need to know!"

It was signed Becky, and a new last name I did not recognize. Had I been gone so long she had gotten a divorce, I wondered?

There was a number to call, a LA number. I just fell to the ground. My first reaction was Rage, how could she have done this to me? Then it was followed by sadness, later despair.

I called my lawyer again. He told me he had done nothing, heard nothing and from the court records he checked this morning after my call, there were no actions against me, or Becky, at least under our married name.

I went inside, my key still worked, but no phone. It had been disconnected. I went to the 7-11 down the street and used my credit card to call the LA number. It rang, on the 4th ring a message came on to leave a number and a brief message. It was easy, Bec I'm home, no phone, Bec what's going on?"

I waited at home for her call. Duh, no phone!

Three days later a cab pulled up, the driver stood by the opened door and Becky exited. She looked like death warmed over as the saying goes. Her head was covered with a scarf, she was pale and very thin. (I found out later why she looked the way she did) Emaciated better described her. I had only one thing I could do. I ran to her, tears blinding me as I tried to put my arms around her and hold her. It was not to be.

"You Bastard you! Where were you when we both needed you?"

She was the one who left. She was the one who cheated. She was the one who had lied to me. How was it now my fault? It did not matter, where was my sister Kathy?

She said the one thing that could even be worse than what happened with Jimmy.

"Kathy is dead! She killed herself after you left us?"

She turned to go back into the cab.

"Bec, No, Please, Please why has all this happened, Why did you leave me? Why is Kathy dead?"

That realization seemed to hit her cold.

She got back out of the cab and threw her arms around me, sobbing. "I went back to LA for the doctor there to check me out and to tell my Mom and Dad we were going to have a baby. I was so happy. I wanted to surprise you, wanted to surprise Mom and Dad, your Mom and Dad too. Well guess who got surprised, I found out I had Cancer. I tried to call you, I called Kathy, but you were gone."

Oh! JD I lost the baby, our baby. Then she broke down, I took her and we went inside the house. "Everything was falling apart." she said.

'Jim was gone, you were gone, then when I thought we might work things out, Kathy told me you wanted a divorce. When I called back, your Mom told me she had taken pills and never woke up. She left us each a note. Your Mom and Dad just sold everything and went away."

"JD, Kathy, in her letter told me some of the things you thought I had done. I blame myself for not telling you about everything, even now, I'm not sure you would want to hear it or believe me?"

"I will give you a divorce if that is what you want, JD. I never really cheated on you but I was not completely honest with you. Kathy knew the truth. I was almost raped at that 1st party. If it wasn't for that guy you and I called the Shadow I would have been. He saved me, and for the next 2 years tried to bed me then wed me. He., we never went too far. When I said I was 'nice' to him, it was gratitude, he wanted a lot more. You were not around and we had gone out, yes, a lot. I'll tell you all the details, if you want, and I am not proud of myself, but I felt so alone out there? Listen to me, We never had anything that meant anything like you and I had or made love, just sex but I did go too far with him sometimes."

"Why did you marry me then? Why didn't you tell me the truth? Maybe we could have worked things out? Why did you have to lie to me, or not tell me the truth?"

I think we both knew the answer to that. I was not sure how long it had been going on, but I knew she did not love me, at least not then, probably not even we got married. I'm not sure if the guy in New York was her new love, but from all those phone calls she had not told him to stop calling. I did not want any more lies, I was certain I would not believe anything she now told me about her 'other' life.