Chapter 3: Doreen

It took a while, but Beth explained the error of my ways. She reminded me that she was a much keener observer of human nature and that she had greater experience in these matters. Ann Marie had most likely been raped or at least taken advantage of, by my brother while she was (or more likely, they were) drunk. And now, she was suffering because she had harbored a long term crush on me and had been saving her virginity for me. In her mind, since she no longer had that to offer me, her self-esteem took a big hit. To make matters worse, just as she turned eighteen, this gorgeous, new girlfriend came on the scene. Now poor Ann Marie, who had already been traumatized by the rape, was heartbroken over me. Beth believed that suicide might be a real possibility for someone I cared about.

Beth decided that she would seduce AM and she would either become a L.U.G. ("Lesbian Until Graduation") or would become "I.J.F." ("Immediately Josh's Forever"). Beth explained that it might be dangerous for any possible lover she might have if they ever came in contact with me (something about being marked for me rubbing off on that person and them being 'turned to me' and forced into my harem). I sighed, "Looks like we'll need a bigger bed."

'I'll work on that when we get back to the apartment," she smirked.

I was just left thinking would any of this ever stop?

After Beth left to go help Mom, Dave came over to me.

"Shit, bro! How in the hell did you get her?"

I thought his reference to "hell" was kind of appropriate in how I got her, but now realized that she was more of an angel than a demon. "She was attracted to my brain," I simply replied.

"She obviously wasn't going to be attracted to your body," he cracked.

"Well. How it happened doesn't really matter much now, does it?"

"No. I suppose it doesn't. Well, you're lucky as hell, Josh!"

"You're pretty damn lucky too. AM is a great girl."

"She is, but we both know she's not into me."

"Shit! Am I the only person who did not have a clue," I thought.

Dave then kind of surprised me. "Look, I've been pretty pissed at you because I've known that Ann Marie was into you more than she was into me. Still, you've never been a dick about it. You've never tried to hit on her and I appreciate it. Now that she knows that you're taken, maybe she'll just embrace her relationship with me. Still, for all I know, she'll just dump my ass now. Whatever you do, just be nice to her, OK. Some shit has been going down with her lately."

"Well, you did fuck her when she was drunk."

My brother's eyes darkened a bit, but then softened. "Yeah, I was pretty drunk too. I'm not too proud of that. She was pissed at me the next morning, but we talked it out and I thought we were OK. Then about a week later, she got really pissed and went off on me for no reason. Then a week after that, we were back to the way we've been for the most part."

A very sobering thought crossed my brain, but I did not want to drop it on Dave. We were actually having a real conversation for the first time in a couple of years. It took my girlfriend's loveliness to fry his brain and some real concern for his own girlfriend to crack the ice. Now the more I thought about it, AM and Dave weren't right for each other. While they were intellectually compatible, AM was a high performer, while Dave was a slacker. They had been kind of sports buddies, as AM had been the only girl on Dave's Little League team and they finally kind of moved into dating from being friends.

"Well, if you like, I'll talk to her, Dave," I offered.

"I'd appreciate that, Josh. If it's over then it is over. If she doesn't want me, I'd like to move on, but I don't want to leave her like this. Since she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to you."

As I walked towards the kitchen to check on Beth and my mom, I thought about the conversation I just had with my brother. I almost felt guilty about taking AM away from Dave. Still, the thought of my brother taking advantage of her, deadened whatever burgeoning feelings of remorse I might have otherwise felt. Despite his obvious concern for AM, Dave did not deserve her. He would get his wish about being able to "move on" and Ann Marie's welfare would become my responsibility.

As AM had already left, my talk with her would have to wait. If the AM situation was not bad enough, I got a call that indicated that two others who I cared about might be in trouble. The call was from my best friend's ex, Doreen.

Mike Guttenberg was my best friend growing up. I'd known him since we were about two. What was special about Mike was that while he was brilliant, he was athletically gifted. He was our class's best athlete and finished number four in class rank (two spots behind me). What was great about Mike was that while he was the most popular guy in school, he did not forget about me. He even convinced Stephanie Van Allen to go to the senior prom with me (when her boyfriend broke up with her at the last minute). Stephanie had all three "Bs'" She was blond, busty and beautiful. Unfortunately she had a fourth "B". Stephanie could also be a world class "bitch" when she wanted to be one. Damn did she look good on my arm in our prom pictures though (and she did concede that I "did not look awful" in my tux).

Now, Doreen was calling me. Doreen Chinaud, was the most beautiful girl in school. She was also one of the sweetest and kindest people you'd ever want to meet. Still, most people were immediately drawn to her appearance. Her lustrous strawberry blond hair was quite distinctive. Her baby blue eyes and her ever so slightly puffy cheeks gave her an incredibly sweet and innocent look, which proved that there is indeed still truth in advertising. While she was not tall, she had the well sculpted legs of the cheerleader she had been in high school. Her ass was generous, but not large. Regardless of her superlative attributes, her one asset (or should I say "two") that stood out were her incredibly huge breasts. She was easily and "E cup", if not larger and her bras had to be industrial strength to support her back during her cheer routines.

Doreen really only had one flaw. What was it, you may ask? Let's just say that for some people, calling her dumb as a post would almost be insulting to the poor post. I guess she was not really dumb. She just wasn't quick on the uptake (or a bit of a bimbo, if you will). If you thought Mike went out with her just for the sex, however, you'd be wrong. While, she had given up her virginity to him, it was not until Senior Prom night (they had started dating two years earlier when her parents finally relented and let her date). Needless to say, Doreen did not go to college. She stayed in town and worked at a local Infinity dealership as a receptionist (obviously, she sat in a very prominent location, as I'm sure management was quite happy for her to be seen). Despite Mike going away, they managed to hold together a long distance relationship for more than two years. I always figured Mike stayed with her just to protect her. Eventually, though he met someone at school and then Doreen was history.

So, I was quite surprised to be getting a call from the "Boobapocalypse" (as some people jokingly called her).

"Hi Josh-ee, it's me, Reenee," she said calling us by her cute nicknames she came up with for us.

'Hi Reenee, what's up?" I smiled, at hearing her happy voice. Her tone seemed to quickly change though.

'I hear you're back and I'm worried about Mikey," she said (as you can tell, she liked to add an "ee" sound to all of her friends names).

"What's wrong?"

"He and his new girlfriend, Moira stopped off at home to drop off some of Mikey's clothes, before they left to have Christmas with her family. Then they will come back to spend New Year's with Mike's parents."

"How do you know this?"

"They told me. I saw them at Clayton's when I picked up lunch for my boss. Josh-ee, Mikey looked really pale, like he was sick. Anyway he was really quiet."

I hated to say the first thing that popped into my head, as it might have hurt Doreen's feelings, but I needed more information. "Do you think Mike might have been embarrassed and didn't want to hurt your feelings about his new girlfriend?" I asked, but was surprised at her response.

"Oh, no! I talk with Moira a lot; even when they were back at school. I really like her. Mikey knows that. Moira's really nice and absolutely beautiful. I can tell that she really likes me too. When I saw them, she even gave me a big hug and a kiss. She even told me that they were going to take me to live with them when they go back to college. Since Moira told me that Mikey would want it, I said I would go with them when they came back from their visit with Moira's parents. Still, I'm worried about Mikey. He just did not seem like himself."

I felt an uneasy feeling come over me. "That's strange. Why would Moira ask you to go with them?"

"She said that I was really beautiful and sweet and that 'I would do nicely'. I'm not really sure what she meant, but when she said that it would make Mikey happy, then I want to do it. That's all I ever wanted."

This made no sense. Now I was getting worried. "Reenee, Honey, that sounds really weird. You really shouldn't go."

"But Moira said that it would make Mikey happy."

"What did Mike say?"

"He kinda looked out of it and just nodded."

OK, this was fucked up. I few months ago, Mike had first spoken to me about Moira and by all indications; she seemed to be nothing but a bright, sweet, attractive young woman. Before I realized that he was interested in going out with her, I joked that I'd be happy to take Moira off his hands, so Doreen would not get jealous. About a couple of weeks later, he called to tell me he had dumped Doreen and was going out with Moira. Reenee, being the sweetheart she was, took the whole thing with grace. In the past, she had confessed to me that she did not think she was good enough for Mike. At the time, I denied it, but I had always felt in some ways she was right. Still, in other ways, there were not many guys that were really worthy of Doreen (maybe even Mike). She was a stunning looking woman, but more importantly, she had a heart of gold that teemed with a loving innocence. She was not virginal, but a purer heart did not exist. I began to feel this overwhelming need to protect her.

"Doreen, before you agree to anything, please let me talk to you."

"It's no use, Josh-ee. I just feel I gotta go!"

From Doreen's description of Mike, I was really worried about him. I was also just as worried about Doreen. She seemed to be strangely adamant about moving away from her family and job (albeit I suppose that the job was not a big deal), to go live with her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend. I knew I would need Beth's take on this. Then I realized that I had not even mentioned her to Doreen yet.

"OK, I'll respect your decision, but could you meet me at Clayton's tonight for dessert? My treat of course."

"Sure, Josh-ee. What's up?"

"I have a new girlfriend. Her name is Beth. I want you and everybody to meet her."

"Oh Josh-ee!" she screamed, giving me an earache, "that's wonderful! You're such a sweet guy! I'm so glad you've finally found somebody!"

In that moment, I felt terribly guilty. Steve Carter, who was another best friend of mine and Mike's, came up with the whole "Boobapocalypse' thing. While I never called or referred to her by that nickname, it was the first thing I thought of when I saw her name pop up on my caller ID. I guess I had forgotten what a sweetheart Doreen was. She and Mike were among the most popular kids in high school and not once was she ever anything but kind to me. Now she's recently lost her boyfriend and yet she's honestly happy for him for finding someone new. She was also happy for me too. "Doreen?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you really sure about living with Mike and Moira."

"It would make him happy, so I want to do it. Besides, I've not been seeing anybody, so it's not like I'm leaving anything behind here."

"Isn't there anybody new on your horizon?"

"Nope. Nobody ever passed the booby test yet."

'The Booby test?"

"Yep. If a guy looks at my boobs for more than three seconds, he's out of the running," she giggled.

"Well, Honey, a guy would have to be gay not to marvel at your wonderful breasts," I laughed.

Doreen sighed.

"What's the matter Reenee?"

"I just wish I was smarter."

"You're just fine the way you are, Honey."

"No, I'm not. If I'd been smarter, I could have found a nice guy like you. Since I haven't found anyone, then it only makes sense that I go with Mikey and Moira. At least that's what Moira said."

"Shit! Reenee is being manipulated and she thinks she's worthless," I thought to myself. At that moment, my heart ached for her. I almost broke down, but I managed to hold it together. Here was this amazing girl telling me that she thought I was a special guy and despite her physical beauty and kind heart, she had no idea of how special SHE was.

"Honey, no matter what Moira says, you already know that you're drop dead gorgeous, but you're one the sweetest, kindest, most honest people I know. You're plenty smart enough to go out with anybody. If it weren't for Beth, I'd have been happy to have gone out with you, if I had Mike's blessing."