Chapter 44

Brock found himself whistling softly as he unlocked the door to his house. The look on Hailey's face when she learned that she could take her little brother to a baseball game had made his day.

His smile widened when he saw Meredith bustling around in the kitchen. She was wearing a green pullover and a black skirt that ended well above her knees. He loved watching her curves as they shifted beneath her clothing. He closed the gap and kissed her on the cheek.

"You look beautiful," he said. "Something smells really good."

"I decided to bathe today instead of waiting for the weekend like I usually do," Meredith joked. "It's just something simple – grilled tuna steaks and rice. I hope that's OK."

"It's great," Brock said, adding a second kiss to her cheek. Meredith hooked him around his neck and directed his lips to hers.

"You seem like you're a in a good mood," she told him. "What sort of endorsements are you looking at?"

"Don't know," Brock related. He filled her in on his day and she joined him in smiling as he told her about dropping off the tickets. "She was so happy. It made me feel really good to know I had a small part in that."

"When you see her again, let her know about the possibility of a scholarship," Meredith suggested.

"I thought about that on the way home," Brock admitted. "I don't have much to do with it anymore. Mel took over as my personal attorney and she coordinates everything with my accountant."

"And I'm sure Susan, Jen and Tara help to determine the candidates," Meredith said.

"And Zoe now," Brock replied. "I put her on the board, too. It makes it easier to slip them money if they need it."

"You're a good man, Brock," Meredith said. "I probably should let you know that more often."

"I think you're a good woman," he replied with a smile.

"I'm serious," Meredith said. "You were so young when the money hit. You had no one to oversee you. You could have done anything with it. You could have easily turned out like Leah."

She sighed.

"You could have turned out like Randi," she said.

"Maybe it will pass," he suggested.

"I don't know," Meredith said. "I saw a side of her I really don't like. I know there are reasons but to say some of the things she said ... I'm not sure I can forgive them. Well, I guess I can forgive them but I'm not sure I can forget them."

"What did she say to you?" Brock asked.

"It's more what she said about you," Meredith admitted. "She said some stuff about me, too. But that didn't bother me. What pissed me off was the way she acted toward you."

"Oh, hell," Brock said. "Don't worry about that. If you heard some of the things I said about you when I was 18, you probably wouldn't be sitting here."

"What sort of things?" Meredith asked.

"Oh, I can't remember them all," Brock admitted. "But the words 'spoiled, ' 'selfish' and 'ungrateful' were the mildest."

"And I'm sure they were used in their correct context," Meredith said with a frown, "because I was all those things and more. But what she said about you isn't true."

"They might be," Brock said. "I'm a pretty complex person."

Meredith's smile returned in force.

"You are about the least complex person I know," she said, poking him in the chest for emphasis. "God, there is so little nuance to you that it throws people. People try to parse through what you're saying to find the meaning and sometimes never figure out you meant exactly what you said. If you call someone an asshole, it's because you think he's an asshole."

"Yeah, subtlety isn't really my strong point," he confessed. "I probably could have broached the subject with Randi a little gentler."

"No," she said. "You did it exactly the right way. Brock, she was asking us to do things that were uncomfortable for us. She wanted a favor. You told her what it would cost."

"You seemed comfortable with it," Brock replied.

Meredith gave a small shrug.

"That's something else I pondered while I was locked away," she admitted. "I thought about what it would be like to have someone totally under my control. It sort of intrigued me. But the closer I got to the actual time, the less I was comfortable with it. I started to have misgivings but I was determined to follow through because it meant so much to Randi. I wish I had had been brave enough to step forward earlier. I could have really screwed up that poor girl."

"Or you could have helped her in a way that worked for everyone," he said. "I was heavy-handed. But I don't think therapy was a bad idea."

"She said you were jealous of her success," Meredith said. "And she said you wanted to make sure you were the most important person in the relationship."

"I don't think I've ever viewed myself as more important than anyone else," Brock said as he sat down at the table.

"That's what I mean," Meredith said. "That's when I realized she was rationalizing her behavior. She couldn't justify how she was acting so she started to make up excuses. But there are other signs that this part is affecting her in more ways than what we noticed. She completely refuses to listen to anyone else. I don't mean about big things. I mean about anything – from the color of her shoes to what to eat for breakfast. If someone suggests one thing, she picks something else. I pointed it out to her last night just before I left. I told her if that wasn't a sure sign that something was wrong, I didn't know what was. Then I came home and snuggled up to my honey – who didn't even notice, by the way."

"Sorry about that," Brock said. "I haven't slept well in a few days. I was a little more concerned about what the doctor might find yesterday than I let on."

"Why didn't you say something?" Meredith asked. "You let on that everything was routine – that it was just something the team needed to cover its ass."

"You had enough to worry about," Brock said.

"I want you to understand this," Meredith said, moving over and crouching in front of him. She reached up and put a hand on either side of his face. "There is no one more important to me than you. Yes, I have some I view as equally important. But no one is more important. We're a team. If something is bothering you, I want you to tell me. Even if it is something you think I won't care about. I want to know."

"I'll try," Brock said. "Look, I've never been good at sharing that sort of stuff. I worried about it but I knew there was nothing I could do to change it. Having you worried wasn't going to change anything either."

Meredith frowned and stood back up.

"Maybe not," she said. "But a burden shared is a burden halved."

"Wow, you're going all Zen on me now," Brock joked.

"I'll go all Zen on you, Mister," Meredith replied, but she was smiling, too. "So, anything else worrying you?"

"Nothing you're not already concerned about," Brock told her. "I mean, you know, the situation with Randi needs a resolution."

"I consider it resolved," Meredith said. "I think I finally came to the same conclusion you did. That part of our relationship has to be over. It was fun. Don't get me wrong. I found it exciting for a while. But it's hard enough to make things work with two people without adding a third."

"And what if she realizes what's going on?" Brock asked.

Meredith shook her head.

"It won't matter," she replied. "At least not to me. I'm not pissed off at her. But I realized that part of her problem was ... well is a lack of maturity. I'm not saying you and I are much better. I proved that at Halloween. Still, we've lived a little more, seen a little more maybe. If Randi came through that door in five minutes sporting ponytails and sprouting angel wings, I would still say this portion of our lives is over and it's time for us – you and me – to move forward."

It was more like 10 minutes – and there were no angel wings or ponytails in evidence – but Randi did show up shortly after Meredith made her pronouncement. Brock had set the table while Meredith finished dinner preparations. She was pulling a bottle of wine out when the doorbell rang.

Brock opened it to find Randi standing there, staring at her feet.

"Hey," he said. "Forget your key?"

"I wasn't sure I was welcome," Randi said softly. Brock put his arm around her shoulder and ushered her in.

"Always," he said, leaning down to kiss her on the top of the head. "How are you doing?"

"Confused, Embarrassed," she admitted, finally looking up. "I could go on. Do you guys have a few minutes?"

"We're just getting ready to sit down for dinner," Brock said. "You're welcome to join us."

"No thanks," Randi replied. "I ate with Mom. I'll come back later."

"You can stay if you want," Brock told her just as Meredith poked her head around the corner to see who their visitor was.

"Hi," she said in what she hoped was a cheerful voice. "You're just in time for supper if you're hungry."

"Mom and I just finished," Randi said again.

"Well, you can sit and watch us eat," Meredith joked. "Watching Brock stuff his face should give you nightmares for a month."

Brock ushered Randi through to the dining room. The food on the table looked wonderful and he was glad he hadn't eaten when the rest of the guys had.

Randi glanced down at how she was dressed and then at how Brock and Meredith were attired. Brock wore a tan Oxford over green cotton slacks. Randi wore a pair of cutoff sweatpants, an old University of Alabama sweatshirt and her pink Dodgers cap.

"I don't want to interrupt a date," she said.

"You're not," Meredith said. "Brock got some good health news yesterday and we're celebrating. We'd love to have you join us."

"Health news?" Randi asked with concern. "I thought things were going fine."

"They are," Brock said.

"The doctors were worried about his heart and lungs," Meredith cut in. "I didn't find out about it until today either."

"But you're OK?" Randi asked, genuinely concerned

"I'm fine," Brock confirmed. "They said everything is normal for 24-year-old athlete. There is nothing to worry about."

"Thank God," Randi said.

Meredith poured two glasses of wine and looked questioningly at Randi.

"I'll just get some water," she said. Meredith stilled Randi with a hand and went back to the fridge while Brock ushered Randi to her normal chair. Meredith returned with a bottle of water and another wine glass.

"So, how was your day?" Brock asked the table at large.

Randi glanced toward Meredith to see if she planned to answer.

"I did nothing but a whole lot of it," she said with a smile. "Actually, I was a Domestic Goddess today. I did some laundry, took Brock's suits to the dry cleaner and cleaned the kitchen."

"Thanks," Brock said. "I meant to get to that yesterday but got sidetracked."

Meredith smiled and winked.

"I had lunch with Tiffany Wells," Randi said. "I'm sorry about how I was acting. Things got away from me."

"It happens," Brock replied. Randi slid a piece of paper across the table toward him.

"I'm seeing Dr. Sharon Keller tomorrow afternoon," she told them. "It's just a preliminary evaluation so I'm not sure I'll stay with her. But I'm committed to making sure this opportunity doesn't alter my personality."

"It probably will anyway," Brock said. Randi looked at him quizzically.

"Everything we do shapes us in some way," he explained. "This is no different. You'll grow from it. You'll come out of it different than you went in. The main thing is to make sure you come out of it better for having done it."

Randi nodded her understanding and sighed loudly.

"Just like I've come out of our situation better than I went in," she said. "I don't really know how to say this so I'll just come out with it. I don't think our friendship will survive if we don't change our relationship."

She gulped some water and waited for one or the other of her (now former) lovers to speak. They sat silently.

"So you've come to the same conclusion?" she asked after a pause.

"Separately and together," Meredith said with real sadness in her voice. "I've truly enjoyed the time we've shared together. But I enjoy being around you outside of that portion of our lives. I don't think I want to watch that evaporate."

"I know I don't," Randi admitted. "There are a lot of things that played into my meltdown. The role sort of overwhelmed me. I know that, now. But I was already feeling a little overwhelmed, I think. I sat and talked with Mom for a long time today. She gave me a lot of valid reasons why it didn't work out. In fact, I think she was surprised that it worked as long as it did. There are two main reasons I think we should end things. First, I'm not as committed to it as you two. It took me thinking about the future before I could admit that to myself. But there really is no future. There can't be. We're just too visible.

"Which leads me to my second reason: This role is really going to put my face out there. Right now, outside of big events and blind luck, I can pretty much live as I want. Sure, my name turns up on websites a bunch. But no one really tries to follow me places or looks for things to discredit me. This role is going to change that. I'm OK with it. I accept it as part of my job. But I don't accept it as part of yours. I know Brock would be extremely upset to see his personal life played out in the tabloids. Merie, I think you'd feel the same way. This role would assure that if we stay together."

Meredith bit her lip but nodded.

"I've considered the alternative, too," Randi continued. "I thought about dropping the role and trying to make things work out here. I'm not sure that is possible. I still want to experience true independence. I still want to feel like I can make a decision without having to consider other people. In a year or two, I'll probably regret this choice. But for now, I think it's the only one I can really make and be happy."

Brock nodded his understanding. It was exactly the choice he had made when he left California the first time. Of course, he hadn't counted on all of his friends coming with him. That brought a fresh thought to his mind.

"Would you still like to live here?" he offered. "I'd welcome it if you do."

"Really?" Randi asked. She had resigned herself to finding an apartment or a house away from her friends. She could have stayed at home but with her new stepfamily coming in, that might have proven awkward. She glanced toward Meredith for confirmation that she agreed with Brock.

Meredith smiled toward her.

"I think that would be good," she said. "You'd have freedom but you'd also have support. We care about you, Randi. I hope you know that anything we've done or suggested is because we thought it was best for you. I'd like to have you here."

"I didn't want to put you on the spot," Randi said, "but I'd like to be here. You were right when you said this place feels like home to me. Most of it is because you two were here. But it's also the place where I figured out I could be myself and people would still like me. You guys are so great."

January and the new year brought a host of changes to Brock's world. He, Meredith and Randi finalized the deal in late December to purchase the house from J.C. It was a strictly cash purchase, with each of the trio putting up $2.8 million. Randi moved into a room as far away from the master bedroom as she could find. Still, she seemed happy as she was getting ready to film the pilot for her new TV series.

One by one, friends came to move into the houses in the new subdivision. The homeowner's association was initially leery of having three unmarried people owning a house in their area – but relented quickly when Brock told them if they balked (or forced him to join) that he would simply move into one of the houses in the subdivision and sue them to remove to gates that blocked the access to his new home.

Zoe was the first one to arrive. The lease on her mother's apartment ended in December – it had been renewed just before the woman's death – so she moved in right after Christmas. The others were locked into their leases for varying amounts of time. Tara's lease expired in January; Mel would move in February and Susan would come out in March.

The two holdouts were Emmy – who was reluctant to move in with Zoe – and Jen – who insisted that Brock had spent enough money on her already. Jen was the one who could have moved in first – having no lease at all since she was living with her sister. The rest of the group finally talked her around and she took up residency shortly after Zoe.

Emmy still fought the notion until Esmi got involved. She and Al had agreed to front the money for Emmy's house – once they learned she didn't plan to move in with Zoe just yet. After much discussion, Esmi finally pointed out that Emmy was already paying more to rent an apartment than she would if she took over a mortgage payment on a house. Just before classes started in January, Emmy relented and moved in next door to her girlfriend.

She insisted upon a mortgage for the full amount in order to pay her family back but no one really thought it would work out that way.

On a professional front, things didn't go nearly as smoothly for Brock or the Dodgers.

The Dodgers pulled off a deal in late December that sent Eurebal Cardozo and a Class A pitcher to Baltimore for a catcher who spent the previous year as their backup. Josh was worried but Tara said she would rather Brock didn't risk her source by going and telling Josh what the plan was for him.

Instead, Brock urged him just to keep an open mind about what the team had in mind for him. Josh immediately started asking questions and Brock finally told him the truth – not about the position the team envisioned for him but that Brock couldn't tell him what he knew.

"It's not bad," Brock assured him. "Really, I would tell you if I could. But I gave my word. Don't worry about it and things will shake out by Spring Training."

Josh accepted Brock's words at face value – helped along by a call from Jim LaCross assuring him that his playing time would not decrease.

The free agent market was slow and the Dodgers really hadn't made much of an attempt to sign any of the few decent players out there. The team had let several players go without any attempt to re-sign them – and they didn't offer a contract to two players who were arbitration eligible, making them free agents as well.

Upper management had decided to make a concerted effort to bring in quality players who also were high-character guys. It hadn't taken them long to realize that every piece of negative publicity the team received had been courtesy of a few players. Those players wouldn't return if the team could find some way to move them.

The new philosophy showed when the offseason signings picked up after the World Series.

The Dodgers picked up a pair of relief pitchers and a backup infielder. The team was content to head into the season with much the same cast that had performed so well the season before, so long as they could get rid of a couple of "problem children" along the way.

Then news came from Venezuela in early January that Armando Guerra, the team's starting second baseman, had been the victim of a kidnapping attempt and had been gravely wounded protecting his family.

Guerra's life wasn't in danger but his livelihood was. He had been shot in the left leg and would miss the season.

Carlos Pena, who backed up Guerra and Brock the season before, had been released and had signed with Philadelphia. There were no decent second basemen left in the free agent pool and few teams were dangling anyone who didn't have an inflated contract as trade bait.

The only decent infielder left unsigned was a shortstop who was a year or two past his prime. He would be a serviceable backup at second base but he couldn't be counted on to perform on a daily basis. Likewise, the utility infielder the team already signed was workable for a game or two but he wasn't ever going to start for a contending team.

A corresponding problem for the Dodgers was what to do with Toby Cerutti, the team's starting third baseman. He was a problem in the clubhouse but his contract was such that no one would touch him in a trade without the Dodgers picking up most of the $21 million left on the deal. Even then, they were only offering marginal prospects in return.

The team also wanted to rid itself of Lou Stimson, who wasn't a good fit in the new-look clubhouse. He was considered a decent closer but he wasn't going to unseat an established relief pitcher. He was also going to ask for the moon at the end of the season when he hit arbitration. Teams were leery of taking him on, despite the league's constant need for relief pitching, fearing he would continue to be a disruption in the clubhouse and that they would wind up losing his services after one season when it came time for arbitration.

The second problem resolved itself first. The defending World Champion Twins were dealt a serious blow to their hopes to repeat - just before it came time for pitchers and catchers to report in early February. Their star relief pitcher was denied an entrance visa and was arrested on identity theft charges in his home nation of the Dominican Republic. Word leaked out that the player was actually three years older than the team thought and had falsified his records by exchanging identities a decade before with another man on the island.

It would be several months before the issue was resolved and the Twins were forced to make a move. They offered a pair of Double-A players for Stimson and the Dodgers shipped him off without a second thought.

Cerutti's situation lingered longer. Everyone in baseball knew the Dodgers wanted more than anything to trade him. They were committed to Josh Hart at third base and told their former third baseman that he would make the team as a pinch hitter if he made it at all. They even took the unprecedented step of permitting Cerutti's agent to contact other teams to seek a trade.

Brock was finalizing his preparations to head to Arizona in early February when he received a call from Jim LaCross, who was already in Arizona at the team's facilities in Glendale.

"Hey, Skip," Brock answered. "How do things look down there?"

"It's weird," LaCross admitted. "I've been in this organization for 20 years as a player, coach and manager. Every year it was off to Dodgertown in February. I knew all the restaurants and bars. I've lived in the same house down there for almost a decade. Now we're here. It's still shiny and new but I'm not sure I don't like the old place better."

"Yeah, sometimes new things aren't necessarily an improvement," Brock said. "What's up?"

"A couple of things," LaCross said. "I wanted to see if you were still coming down early."

"I'll be there in three days," Brock said. He wasn't required to report for three more weeks but he wanted to get a head start on ensuring his sophomore season went as well as his freshman year had.

"Good," LaCross told him. "Look, I want you to think about something. You know we've been trying to move Toby. Well, we have a proposal from Seattle. It's not a bad deal. They're willing to take his entire contract. We have to take a bad deal in return but we think it will help us more than having Cerutti on the bench at $10.5 million a year."

"OK," Brock said. "What's the hold up?"

"I wanted to talk to you about moving to second base," LaCross said. "The Mariners are offering Driesbach straight up. The thing is, I don't think he'll want to move to second base. You're a better shortstop. I'm not saying you aren't. But he'll do and I think you'd be fine at second."

"I haven't played second regularly since high school," Brock said. "But if you think it'll help, sure, I guess I'll give it a shot."

"You should contact your agent before you decide," LaCross urged. "I don't think it will cut your value but it might."

"I'm not worried about that," Brock told him. "Driesbach is a decent player. I'm more worried about what happens if it turns out I'm a crappy second baseman. I mean, he's getting paid $13 million this season. I still have options left. I don't want to learn to play second base at Jacksonville."

LaCross smiled to himself as he heard Brock's reaction.

"We don't foresee that happening," he said. "You'll be fine at second base. We're not looking for a reincarnation of Roberto Alomar. You're really the best option we have available. That became obvious early on. The market on second basemen is pretty thin. We're either looking at a move like this or going into the season shorthanded."

"Sure, I understand," Brock said with a frown. "Do we have someone who can help me out? I mean, I know both of our infield instructors are former shortstops."

"If you're OK with it, we're going to bring in a guy to help you out," LaCross said. "Are you sure this isn't going to create an issue for you? You're a big part of this team, Brock. You're going to be a big part of this team going forward."

"I'm good," Brock replied. There was little else he could say and not look like a total dick. "I'll be there by Friday and we can see how it's going to look."

"Good man," LaCross said with relief. "We'll have things sorted out by the time you get into town."

Meredith had watched the expressions on Brock's face change throughout the conversation. He walked outside early on and she couldn't hear what was discussed. But she recognized the frown when he came back inside.

"Problems?" she asked.

He gave a shrug.

"The found a taker for Cerutti," he answered. "And a replacement for Guerra."

"That sounds good," Meredith opined.

"It's who they want to replace Guerra that's the problem," Brock said.

"They did not go out and get Repling!" Meredith hissed.

"No," Brock said with a smile. Meredith virulent dislike of Carter Repling and everything associated with the Diamondbacks was always amusing to him – considering she had never met the man and had never watched a baseball game at Chase Field.

"Then what's the problem?" she asked. "Don't tell me they found someone worse."

"Maybe," Brock said with a sigh. "They want me to play second base this season."

"That's stupid," Meredith announced. "They had no one to replace you last year and look what that got them. Nothing they've done during the offseason will fix that."

"Seattle is willing to send Matt Driesbach over for Cerutti," Brock explained.

"Wow!" Meredith said. "That changes things. That sounds like a great deal for the Dodgers."

"He's no better than I am," Brock replied angrily.

"Whoa!" Meredith told him. "That's not what I said – or what I meant. I've heard you and Al talk about Cerutti and I've seen Cerutti completely forget about defense when he strikes out twice in a game. I'm just saying that getting anything for a guy like that would be a good deal for the team and it sounds like a deal any team would make."

"I guess," Brock said. "Still, I'm not really happy about changing positions. I barely made the team last year because I was learning how much faster the game is at this level. I was sort of looking forward to having a chance to build on what I started – not completely start over."

"Is it that much different?" Meredith asked. "I mean, I see guys who play both. Every team has a guy like that. I know you played some second base in the minors."

"A utility infielder," Brock clarified. "He's a guy who is passable at both positions but not very good either. I don't want to be that guy. The footwork at second is completely different – it's backward. It's like dancing. You can't switch leads in the middle of a song. I was good with working at second in the minors if I meant I got to Cleveland faster. For the first year or two in Cleveland, that was going to be my role. But I thought I proved myself last year."

"I'm pretty sure you proved yourself to everyone," Meredith said soothingly. "This is about getting rid of a cancer and improving the team. Let's face it; you're going to be head and shoulders above anyone else the team could put at second base. Yes, you'd be more comfortable at shortstop and you'd be just as good if not better than Driesbach. But would he be a good as you at second?"

"Potentially," Brock said. "We don't know how good I am going to be there. You have to change your natural reactions when you change positions. I'll have to remember to cover first on a bunt or second on a grounder to third. My cutoff responsibilities change, too."

"I think you will be able to remember which side of the field you're on," Meredith said with a smile. "What's really bothering you?"

Brock sighed.

"I guess it just irks me that they brought in someone to replace me," he admitted. "Guerra was a good player. He wasn't great by any stretch but he was, I don't know... , reasonable. I thought I was the team's long-term answer at shortstop. It's where I like to play. It's where I'm best. STATS said I had the second-highest range factor in the league last year. Plus, well, I thought I was the anchor of the infield. They call the position 'The Keystone' because it is. It's where the best fielder always plays."