Chapter 1

"You need to tell Abi," Mum said the moment the car sprang into life and moved away from Sarah's house.

"Why? She isn't-"

"She has been your lover," Mum replied, her eyes looking across to the passenger seat. "Don't let her find out through someone else." I sighed and ran my hands through my hair, groaning theatrically. I knew Mum was right but didn't know what I was going to say to her or how she would react.

It was true that Abi had always encouraged me to seek a relationship with Sarah, but she was my lover and our relationship would have to change fundamentally. I wondered how Abi would react when faced with this reality. I picked out my phone and held it in my hand for a moment before looking back at Mum. "Can you drop me off at her house?" I asked. "I want to do it in person."

A smile flickered over Mum's face, and she nodded. "Yes, but I can't wait, you'll need to make your own way home."

"I know," I replied looking out of the window at a passing train overtaking us. "But I should see her before we go to Cumbria."

Mum pursed her lips. "Yes, you should really."

It was hard to read Mum at times, she seemed to suppress a grin, or a knowing smile, but wasn't sure if that was approval at what I was going to do or just her imagining how the conversation between Abi and I would pan out.

This began to eat away at me, what would I say and how would I say it? Suddenly, I became anxious, experiencing deja-vu from when I asked Abi out and not sure how she would take it. I reasoned that I was being big-headed or arrogant, if Abi wanted to date me then she would have said yes when I asked. She didn't go out with me because she didn't want to go out with me, and she would probably show little interest in my news.

The reverse could also be true, perhaps Abi was playing 'hard to get' and that the fact that Sarah and I were now dating would disappoint her. Perhaps she would go crazy with the bread knife and slaughter me into little bits. I began to worry, and Mum looked over at me.

"What are you thinking?"

I let out a small laugh. "Nothing," I replied, and certain that she wouldn't believe, or wouldn't want to believe the truth, and I put the thoughts out of my mind. Mum glanced over and pulled the car into a space a few doors down from Abi's house, and she put her hand on my knee.

"Be nice to her," Mum warned and I bit my lip and nodded. "And don't be home too late."

"I will be," I said. "And I won't be home too late." Mum watched me as I got out of the car and waved as she pulled away towards the town centre. My hands trembled as I walked up towards Abi's house, and I didn't look back towards Mum driving down the road. I could feel the white heat on the back of my neck, and I clenched my fists and took a deep breath.

The black door of Abi's ground floor flat was in front of me and I knocked stoutly, hearing movement behind. "Hello Andy," Angela said in a bubbly voice the moment she saw me and I nodded, speechless for a moment.

"Is Abi in?" I asked. Angela nodded and pointed towards Abi's door.

"You OK?"

"Yeah," I squeaked. Angela cocked her head to one side; she clearly didn't believe me. I knocked on Abi's door and poked my head around it to see Abi sorting out her books.

"Hello stranger," she teased, our eyes meeting across the cluttered bedroom. "Your mother kicked you out yet?"

I spluttered and stood in the doorway motionless. "It's Sarah," I stammered and bit my lips. Abi looked up and stared at me, her eyes blinking and I felt guilty. "We are umm..." I hesitated, and Abi burst into a grin.

"You asked her out?" I went to reply and then realised that actually I hadn't asked her out at all, she had decided that we were in a relationship, I had barely had a say in the matter.

"Sort of," I replied cryptically. "We are, you know."

Abi dropped a couple of her books and leapt over the rest of them on the floor, throwing her arms around me. "Congratulations. Took you long enough," she said, and I wasn't sure how much of a chastisement it was. I hugged her tightly and then went to kiss her, but she moved her head to one side.

"We've kissed before," I muttered, and she smiled at me.

"But not when you've had a girlfriend," Abi replied and hugged me again, pushing my face into her long, brown hair. "You happy now?"

I broke from her embrace and nodded with a huge grin on my face. "Yeah, very. Waited for ages," I replied and Abi giggled. "Are you OK with it?"

Abi was smiling and nodded. "Of course, something you should have done months ago. Bloody told you to." I felt a sense of relief that Abi was genuinely happy with my new relationship, and while she had no reason to object, it still worried me that she might feel left out, or dumped. In truth, she exhibited almost a sense of delight or relief, and I just couldn't fathom it, wondering whether she just wanted to be sure that I wouldn't ask her out again; was I really that unattractive?

"It won't change what I think about you," I said as my thoughts meandered their way through my ponderings. "I still do think you are a great friend, and I still want to spend time with you."

Abi bit her lip and smiled. "You'll just have to ask your girlfriend, won't you?"

Abi grabbed her coat and dragged me out of the flat, still wondering about her attitude. "Dinner, on me. To celebrate," she said and then looked at my clothes. "And seriously, get rid of that T-Shirt, you look sixteen."

"I am sixteen," I replied instantly with a smile. "And you can't withdraw the benefits bit of our friendship any more." Abi cackled and moved her hands to my sides.

"No," she said with a grin. "But I can tell Sarah to." Her eyes hesitated, and she licked her lips. "'Cause she's an ally now!"

I arrived late home and Mum gave me raised eyebrows. "Abi wanted to celebrate with me," I responded to her, and she just shrugged.

"Not my place," she muttered. "How was Abi?"

"Good." I paused and wondered how I could convey her relief or happiness without it sounding ridiculous and just repeated, "good," before adding, "and we went for a meal."

Mum shuffled some papers and looked back. "Just be careful."

"What with Sarah?"

"With both of them," Mum said with a chuckle. "They are both going to want you, and at some point, you could upset one or both of them. Abi might just be a friend now, but she is as much a part of your past as anyone else you know, and Sarah might feel threatened by it."

I bit my lip. "I don't think so. Well I hope not."

Mum got up and picked up her keys. "I will be amazed if she isn't," she said and unlocked the interconnecting door. "I'll see you later. And don't forget to pack."

"Yeah, bye."

I stared at the door for a moment, what did Mum mean? Abi and I were friends but then so was Sarah and Abi so why would Sarah feel threatened by a friendship and some sexual activities that happened weeks or months ago? It was not as though Sarah and I hadn't had any sort of physical contact, but then Abi had only served to encourage me to pursue Sarah. As Abi had said, Sarah and her were allies.

I stopped staring at the door, and bounded up the stars, it was too late to consider the perplexing behaviours of the females in my life, and I still had not packed anything for the forthcoming trip to the Lake District; I had planned to do it when I got back from college, but unforeseen activities had distracted me for half-a-dozen hours and I had to do it before the following morning.

Mum had helpfully left a hint for me: there was my open suitcase on my bed, and I opened a few drawers and emptied eight pairs of underwear, socks, T-Shirts, shirts, trousers, shorts, camera and a pair of smart shoes. I would put little things like mobile phone charger, razor and toothbrush in, in the morning.

I was too tired to wonder about anything else and threw the suitcase on the floor climbing into bed and drifted to sleep immediately with my dreams filled by a wonderful young lady.

The following morning was hectic; I was awoken by a warm body jumping on top of me and immediately smiled thinking it was Abi, which then worried me. I opened my eyes expecting Rhea with a deadly weapon and felt the warm lips of Sarah on mine.

She grinned. "Mum dropped me off early," Sarah said quickly and swept her hair behind her ear. She ran her hand through my short hair. "You look so cute when you were sleeping."

I grunted and tried to shake the sleep out of my eyes, but Sarah moved in for another kiss. We were interrupted by a mostly naked Rhea opening my door and announcing that I needed to come down for breakfast.

I snarled at her and kissed Sarah again. "Oi, get a room," Rhea snapped.

"We have," Sarah, and I replied in unison and Rhea grumbled and left the doorway.

We took the train down to London and then boarded an Underground train, before we got on the express train that was going to Glasgow, via our stop at a small village near the Lake District where we could catch a connecting train into the National Park. It wasn't an uncomplicated journey, but we spent the vast majority of it, on a fast, comfortable train spearing its' way through the English countryside.

I always noticed how the sky became darker and greyer as the train shot north, and watched as sunny Hertfordshire gave way to rain clouds in the Midlands.

Simon looked over at the adjacent table: the two lads had a bottle of beer each and he whispered to Rhea who giggled and touched him back. "What?" I asked, and Rhea just bit her lip.

"Just thinking of getting a beer," she muttered and Sarah shook her head.

"They won't serve you, they might serve Andy."

"Maybe," I said, looking at the age of the guys next to us, they didn't look eighteen either, and I looked back at Rhea. "I can try."

Rhea scoffed. "Bet you won't manage it," she said firmly, and I sucked in my lips.

"Bet ya, if I can get us a drink, I get to have the double room downstairs at Dad's."

Rhea puckered her lips and took a deep breath. "OK, I know that is your favourite but that means I will be stuck next to the Ice Princess," Rhea moaned, and Simon looked at her.

"Dad's stepdaughter who will probably spend all week at her friends," I replied and then looked at Rhea. "Deal?"

"Yeah, OK."

I began to suck in my lips and then told Rhea to ring me on my mobile in one minute. Suddenly, the idea of a piece of social engineering, that even Paula would be proud of, was forming in my mind. Rhea laughed, and I walked down the aisle towards the buffet car.

I answered my phone the moment I joined the back of the queue. "Andy," I replied and then heard the giggling voice of Rhea. "You better be pullin' my chain," I said in an authoritative voice. A couple of people in the queue looked around I had to suppress a grin. "I don't pay you to leave the back door unlocked. If you've lost two bottles of vodka then you better find them or they come out of your wages," I said assertively.

I heard Rhea sigh. "Enjoying yourself?"

"No no no no no no," I said firmly into the phone as if I was interrupting someone. I was enjoying playing the big boss and snarled into the hand-held device. "You don't mess with us. If you've left them by an unlocked door, it is negligence." I paused and waited for Rhea to tease me and then said. "Tony there, right I'll speak to him later. I've got a weekend off with some friends up at Uni. Tell him to ring me." I put the phone back into my pocket and looked at the lady in front of me. She had a bright red top on and smart trousers and gave me a weak smile. "You just can't find decent staff nowadays," I told her, more for the gentleman serving the drinks than for her.

"I know," she said with a grin. "I run a cookware shop, and every week the staff break some thing. Costs me a fortune."

I shook my head. "Trouble is, they don't treat anything with any respect," I replied, repeating a well worn phrase of my mother. She nodded and, having reached the front of the queue placed her order with the gentleman.

"So what business are you in?"

I glanced at the server listening in and just pursed my lips before speaking. "I bought a pub with my Uncle on my eighteenth birthday," I told her. "Inheritance from grandparents. Going well, but our bar staff are lazy."

She turned to pay the cashier, and I waited for her to leave. She wished me luck, and I asked for four beers which he served without even batting an eyelid and I resisted the urge to crow at Rhea from the end of the carriage as I walked back.

Rhea smiled as she saw me walking down the aisle with the tray of drinks and took her beer off before I had even put the tray on the small table.

"Easy," I boasted and took a big gulp of the weak lager masquerading as a proper drink.

"Bet I could have bought them," my diminutive sister cockily replied and gave me a wide-eyed stare as she downed a few gulps of her beer. The train was airless and warm, and the cool beer slipped down nicely. Sarah was stroking my leg as the train progressed and I noticed Simon getting especially close to Rhea but tried to put it out of my mind.

"Strip poker?" Rhea loudly suggested as I pulled out a deck of playing cards and Sarah giggled.

"Not on a train!" I responded immediately and Sarah giggled again.

"I did get stripped on a train," Sarah said, her eyes glinting and Simon scoffed at her. "No, I had to get changed and got caught by the ticket collector," she confessed, and I just wished I had been there to see it!

Much to Rhea's annoyance I wouldn't let her play strip poker in the crowded carriage, but considering her performance the last time we played she should actually have been quite happy by my firmness! Instead, I beat her at normal poker, and she tried to goad Simon into removing his clothes when he forgot the rules. Fortunately for him, both Sarah and I stopped Rhea from getting too serious, and his dignity was maintained.

We changed onto a small train that was practically empty, but Rhea and Simon disappeared to another part of the train. I saw Simon holding Rhea's baggage and suppressed a grin; I was carrying Sarah's bags, much to her annoyance and at the tiny station at the end of the line was Dad waiting for us.

He held out his hand as he was knocked sideways by an excitable, incoming Rhea and I shook it as he recovered from being thrown against the car.

"Good journey?"

"Not bad," I replied to my tall father. I think he had lost a little more hair since I had last seen him, but didn't voice these thoughts. "How are you?"

"Good." He turned to Simon and gave a gentle nod. "Simon?" Simon held out his hand, and Dad shook it. "Have you worked out how to keep her under control yet?"

I scoffed, and Rhea scowled. "Him keep me under control?" She tutted. "As if!"

"It's called Rohypnol," I joked and Rhea gasped before hitting me on the top of my arm.

"Don't start," she warned and Dad turned to Sarah to greet her. He gave me a slightly raised eyebrow as we loaded our suitcases into the boot of his car and we drove off towards the lake.

"What's this I hear about you being suspended?" Dad asked my sister, and she shook her head. "I heard you assaulted your ex-boyfriend and then attacked him in the park, kicking him in his most sensitive of areas."

Rhea grunted. "Oh Dad," she moaned with a scowl. "You shouldn't believe everything Mum tells you, you know what she is like."

I looked at him from the front seat. "But you should believe that. Rhea was furious."

Rhea flipped her hand over the top of my head. "Yes thank you, big brother. So what if I did, he was being a bully."

Dad glanced at me, and I just shrugged. "Well that's Rhea for you, right?"

Sarah and Simon both gasped the moment they saw the view. Neither of them had been to the Lake District, and as Dad drove down to the lakeside, the spectacular sight of Windermere opened up in front of them. Simon was almost enchanted by the "ferry" that ran across the lake on suspended wires. Both Rhea and I had often come across the lake since Dad moved up here, but for Simon and Sarah, it was a new experience.

"It looks so beautiful," Sarah cooed, admiring the mountain in the distance. "Is that Skee - fall?"

Dad chortled. "Scafell Pike is over the other side," he replied. "I think that's Ill Bell."

"How long have you lived here?" Sarah asked, and he rubbed his face as he thought.

"Well I moved up to Windermere in 88. Moved into the house I'm in, in, ahhh, around 93."

Sarah looked back out of the window, and the ferry shuddered to a halt. "It does look lovely. Are we going to climb a mountain, as I have only bought hiking boots, do we need mountaineering gear and stuff?"

I laughed. "We aren't doing Striding or anything. Just a few gentle walks, maybe."

Rhea spluttered. "But I am taking you to the top of the nearest mountain and chucking you off if you get on my tits," she warned to her boyfriend who just pulled a face at her.

"I see Rhea is the same as ever," Dad said to me across the front seat and I laughed, recounting the story of the Tabasco poisoning, and Dad just grinned as the car made it's way towards Coniston. "Sounds like my girl," he said but Rhea didn't hear, or respond if she did.

Dad's home, Mountain View, was not too far from the village, and he pulled up past his black gate to park his saloon car in his drive. I got out, and Sarah openly admired the house.

A set of wide steps ran from the driveway that was enclosed on three sides by the walls of the house built on a slope and on several floors. The steps ran up to the entrance in a gentle arc, and she looked around her. "It's massive," she said, and Dad laughed.

"It's not that big, but I like it," he replied quite modestly, and I looked as Rhea and Simon bounded up the steps.

"We're in the downstairs bedroom," I told Dad who grinned.

"I knew you would be," he replied and looked at Sarah. "I know you like that. It's not got a window, so I am not fond of it, but..." He trailed off and I glanced at Sarah stood at the bottom of the steps looking out over the small lake Dad's house was near.

We had to walk around the house: the actual front door not where the driveway and garages were and entered the hall, a bright room running the length of the house. "Red carpets?" I asked and looked at Dad.

He smiled. "I've redecorated a bit since you came up last," he told me, and I grabbed Sarah's hand and pushed her towards her left and some stairs.

"We're in the cellar?" She moaned, and I took her bag off of her.

"You'll like it," I promised, and we walked down the steps to a small hallway, furnished just like the one we had been in, with cream walls and newly laid burgundy carpet. At the end, the light streamed in through a set of double doors, and I guided her to the right and opened a door to a windowless room.

Sarah smiled when she saw the big double bed and beautifully furnished room. Dad had put a single red rose on the pillow and a bottle of champagne, and she giggled. "Not my doing," I muttered and looked over to small travel fridge in the corner of the room, putting the drink in to cool.

Dad had fitted the room out like a hotel room: we had tea and coffee jars with a kettle, and some biscuits on a table. There was a television, a small couch, loads of lights, and it was almost perfect.

I put Sarah's bag on the floor, alongside mine and took her by the hand. "Close your eyes," I told her and she groaned. "Hey, the only time I have gotten you to do this was for bluebells and diamonds," I replied, and she giggled. I led her by the hand out of the bedroom, across the hall and through a set of double doors.

I had to guide her down some steps, and she sniffed. "I can smell something," she muttered, but I ignored her until she reached the bottom of a small set of steps.

"Open them," I told her and she gasped. In front of her, was a twenty metre long swimming pool, the water still and blue.

"Oh, wow!" Sarah cried and looked back at me. She touched the water: it was warm, and she grinned. "This is amazing."

I bit my lip. "I know, the Jacuzzi in the corner is just brilliant, but there is more." I took her by the hand, and we walked alongside the pool and out through a set of double doors and onto a small sun terrace next to the Jacuzzi. It wasn't big, but there was a wrought iron table and four chairs looking out over the valley.

It was my favourite view of the Lake District, the gentle decline of the land to the picturesque lake and Claife Heights in the background, and while there were more dramatic views in the area, and bigger mountains, it brought back good memories. I looked over to see Sarah taking in the wonderful vista, and she smiled at me. "No wonder you wanted me to come up here."

"It's a good way to start our relationship," I muttered. "Before college and work and reality kicks in." Sarah nodded. We heard a noise and looked up seeing Rhea and Simon on the verandah above the pool and Sarah called up to them.

"Simon, come and see the pool," she called and then she turned to me with a scowl. "Why didn't you tell me to bring my bikini?" Sarah moaned and then looked back. "I'll need to get one when we go to a town."

Rhea cackled, and I just rolled my eyes. "Because Rhea, Dad, Maria, me, Paula when she came, we never wear one. Be free, you'll like it."

Sarah giggled and held my hand, staring out over the picturesque, serene landscape. "This is just, wow."

I shrugged. "I do like it here, it is just breathtaking."

Sarah just gazed out over the lake and smiled. "I agree, this should be a wonderful place to start our relationship." She turned pulled me by the neck of my T-Shirt, kissing me on the lips.

It certainly wasn't our first kiss, or our last that afternoon, but it is the one I have always savoured and remembered. The sheer memory of her soft, puffy lips and gentle tongue surrounded by a light breeze and the feint lapping of the water with the few birds swooping around the property is one that always evokes strong memories. She gazed lovingly into my eyes and smiled as we parted, and then threw her arms around me.

Our special moment was interrupted by Simon's whooping and a splash, following by howls of irritation. Sarah laughed and we moved apart, staring into the pool. A fully clothed Simon was drenched, and Rhea was running along the side of the pool towards the little door where we were walking through.

Sarah waited until she got level with us and then gave her a big push. Rhea wasn't expecting it and lost her balance stumbling over the side of the pool and hitting the water with an almighty splash. Sarah burst out laughing at Rhea's face, a mixture of anger and shock and I pushed my girlfriend towards the main door and the house; Rhea would not be amused.

Rhea wasn't, and Sarah and I wisely left her to stew by taking a gentle walk in the hills. The two mile circular walk I had planned wasn't strenuous, just a walk along the lake and then back up a small hill towards Dad's house.

"So what happens with Kevin?" I eventually asked her as we turned away from the lake. It was a subject that I had been intentionally avoiding but needed to ask; did she plan to still be friends?

"Nothing," Sarah replied tersely. "I don't want anything more to do with him."

I took a deep breath and squinted at her. "Not friends?"

Sarah stared at a rock on the ground and then kicked it against a dry stone wall. "No," she said firmly. "Not at all." I couldn't have denied I was relieved but scratched my nose waiting for her to continue, which she did by raising a very sensitive subject. "But we do need to talk about Donna."

"Donna?"

"Yeah, Donna and Ray. Well your friends are Abi, Zoe, Ray, Jason, Jez. I like them. And my friends are Zoe, Rosie, Ingrid, Jodie but also Donna."

"Right, and?"

"I mean, I need you to sort it out with her." I looked at her wide eyed, and she just shrugged. "I am not going to choose between my friends and my boyfriend. Now if Donna is being a bitch I can sort her out, but I need you to try, I can't have you being a bastard at the same time." I sighed, and Sarah just looked at me in annoyance. "I mean it."

I threw my hands up in front of me and groaned. "She hates me."

"Yes, I know she does. But I will be telling her the same thing." Sarah's eyes softened, and she looked at me pleadingly. "I really, really like you, but I need you to do this thing for me. Try, please."

I sighed. "OK, I'll try," I promised, not totally sure if I meant it and then muttered. "But I don't think it will work."

Sarah scowled and turned back towards the lake. "Did you say you took Paula up here?"

"To the Lakes, yes." I pondered and reminisced, suddenly the memories of Paula weren't quite so painful and Sarah noticed a weird expression on my face. "The first time I touched her, down there, was that wood, yonder."

Sarah giggled and looked to the other side of the lake. "Really. Taking your new girl to the haunts of the old one. That's very smarmy," she said with a grin and I just snorted.

"It wasn't even sexual. Not really. We were out for a walk, and she wanted to pee, really badly and did, but I watched transfixed. She just looked at me and said, 'touch it', so I did.

"Mid stream?" Sarah asked in a teasing voice and I smiled at her leaning against the fence.

"No, not mid stream. After she finished."

"Regret her leaving?" Sarah asked, and I considered her question in silence.

"Err, no. I wish she was still around, I do miss her, but other people have taken their place and she has not written back to me, so I don't think she is missing me. I mean, I used to write and phone loads but she never wanted to speak to me. I guess she moved on."

"I'm sorry," Sarah said, touching my arm and looking up.

"But I have you now and that's even better."

Sarah blushed and then nodded towards the house. "Shall we go, the rain looks like it's going to start."

I wrapped my hand in hers, and we set off up the path towards the road, just getting into the house before it started raining. Dad had prepared dinner and was serving it as we got back to his home.

Rhea and Simon were already seated, and she scowled at Sarah as we sat down. "Where's Maria?" I asked, taking Rhea's attention away from Sarah, and he looked over at Sarah and then me.

"It's half-term here as well. Isabella and Maria have gone to Spain for the week, something about warm weather and catching up on relatives."

He almost grimaced as he spoke: I guessed he had wanted Maria and Isabella to stay, but they had both gone to Spain when Rhea and I were visiting in May and February. Maria disliked us, and what we signified. She was never comfortable around the children of her partner's first marriage, and we were made to feel not welcome; she usually spent the week snapping or being overly emotional if she was around, so I was never unhappy that she had gone for the week.

Of course, Rhea didn't help. She was a similar age to her stepsister, Isabella, and the two of them just hated each other. A couple of years ago, Rhea got so fed up with the aloofness and rudeness Isabella was showing that Rhea crept into her room and sabotaged her en-suite toilet by covering it with clingfilm.

The result was that Isabella's pee ran over the side of the toilet and onto her trousers at the front, and Rhea was shouted at by everyone, not that it made Rhea particularly repentant. Since that time, both of my Dad's adopted Spanish family absented themselves when we came up which I found petty and somewhat unnecessary.

Dad passed around the pizza, and I took another couple of slices, Rhea took four and then nicked some pepperoni from Simon's plate. "Oi," he complained and Rhea feigned ignorance before calling it a "girlfriend tax."

Dad guffawed at this. "If all a girlfriend costs a piece of pepperoni then, well, life would be cheap!"

Rhea scowled at her father. "There are many aspects of the girlfriend tax. Pepperoni plundering is just a very small part of it," she uttered with complete seriousness and Dad forced a determined, non-judgemental look in return. "And there are consequences to anyone who crosses this girlfriend." She glared at Sarah who mouthed a kiss to her.

"Well what's good for the goose is good for the gander," Sarah replied at the accusation, and Rhea looked angrily at Sarah.

"It is not how our relationship works," Rhea added quickly, and Sarah just shrugged and smiled.

"Perhaps you need to learn to be a little calmer," Sarah said in response, and this did little to appease the dragon masquerading as my sibling. The tempestuous character wanted revenge, and I knew Sarah needed to be careful over the next few days: Rhea rarely knew when to stop.

Dad left the table as we chatted and returned with four envelopes. "Your spending money," he said passing them around, and I immediately groaned.

"You don't need to," I said quickly passing it back as he tried to give it to me and he just scowled at me.