Chapter 6: Meeting Carson Sommers

Rebecca walked slowly over the snow-covered grass, her mind still on the research she'd completed in the college library. What she had found that night seemed to contradict everything she'd believed to be the definitive knowledge base of her chosen subject. It was that dichotomy that drew her concentration away from her journey, and only when she realized that the landmarks she normally used to navigate weren't there did she return her attention to her surroundings.

Now understanding that she'd gotten herself lost and completely disoriented, panic began to well up in her chest. She studied the ground and trees around her, not recognizing any of them or their location relative to where she thought she should be. To add to her confusion, it had started to snow heavily again. The large white flakes were quickly obliterating her footsteps, making it somewhere between difficult and impossible to backtrack to somewhere more familiar.

She turned and started back along a route that she thought she'd covered, only to find that she was becoming even more lost and disoriented with the deterioration of any signs of her previous passage. Within what felt like short minutes, even the hints of previous footsteps disappeared under both the falling snow and the flat lighting caused by the snowfall. The haze of a ground fog was becoming thick enough that she couldn't even find her trail back to that point where she'd discovered that she was lost.

There was the sound of wood breaking, and Rebecca quickly turned in the direction she thought it had come from, the panic inside her growing in leaps and bounds. But in the waning light, she could see nothing. Even the crunching of footsteps in the snow around her seemed to come from several places at once. All these contradictory signals had her head reeling, leaving her dizzy, and increasingly filled her with dread and a sense of pending doom.

Suddenly there was a hand over her mouth, holding her in place as she felt herself trapped against a large and solid body, muffling any attempts to scream for help to a point of uselessness. Still, she tried to yell, hoping against hope that someone might hear her and come to her rescue. Then that hand was joined by another, forcing her to the cold ground. The weight of her attacker pinned her down, making movement all but impossible. In the dim reflected light off the snow, she couldn't even see her assailant. All she was aware of was the cold that seeped into her body, slowly rendering her immobile, and threatening to drain the very life from her.

Then another pair of hands made themselves known to her, pushing her further into the cold as they forced her legs apart. There was the dull sound of ripping cloth in her ears, accompanied by an increase in the chill from the winter air over her lower body, exposing her most private place to her attackers, for she was dimly aware that there was more than one.

Beginning to understand her pending fate, Rebecca tried to struggle from the imprisonment of those hands, her panic now augmented by the fear growing inside her foggy brain. But the struggle proved futile, and she felt the temporary warmth of contact on her skin before a man's penis pushed and probed itself against her exposed womanhood, then jammed its way inside her.

There was a searing pain that overruled every other stimulus as her attacker plundered her young body, causing Rebecca to scream at both its intrusion and the humiliation and pain of her attack. As that invading phallus drove deeper inside her, the pain seemed to grow exponentially. It eventually became more than she could tolerate, and the ensuing relief and blackness of unconsciousness afforded her the only sanctuary she'd find.

I woke to the shrill sound of my phone trying to vibrate itself off the bureau beside me and onto the floor. Those feelings of resentment at being pulled out of a solid sleep washed over me, and I searched for the offending device with the thoughts of its destruction still raging in my mind. But a cooler part of my head prevailed, convincing me to just answer the call.

"Hello?" I croaked in my semi-conscious state.

"Is that Keith Hayes?" the voice on the other end asked. I didn't recognize the voice calling me in the middle of the night.

"Who wants to know?" I snapped with indignation.

"My name's Carson Sommers. I believe you know Rebecca Sommers?"

At first the name didn't ring a bell, partially because I hadn't woken up, but mostly because I'd never heard her called that. But as soon as my brain processed the name Sommers, I was instantly wide awake.

"Beckie? Yeah, I know her. She's a good friend of ours. Why?"

"She's in the hospital here in Hendrickson. She was attacked earlier this evening. They called me at home, but she's been asking for you and your ... your wife. I really would appreciate it if you could find it in your heart to come down here. It seems to be very important to my ... daughter."

By now, Tandra was struggling to shed the veil of sleep that had enveloped her and became aware of the serious nature of the call from the tone of my voice.

"Mr. Sommers? We'll be down as soon as we can, but it'll be about half an hour at the earliest. Is Beckie alright?"

At the sound of that question, my sister was up and out of bed, quickly struggling into her clothes as she dug up something for me to wear.

"She was ... she's been raped," Carson Sommers filled me with a voice that threatened to choke on emotion. The rest of what he wanted to say, I knew, could wait. But the hurt and fear in his voice told me that he wasn't doing much better than his daughter.

"What is it, Keith? What's happened?" Tandra asked in a quiet and subdued voice.

"Beckie's in the hospital. That was her Dad. He says she was attacked and raped earlier tonight apparently, and she's been asking for you and me specifically. You up for this?"

"Oh my god! No! Not Beckie! Who would do something like this? Why her?" my sister's confusion driving all rationale out of her mind. "Come on, let's get going!" That irrationality eased up a bit as she tried to get both of us out the door in record time.

My drive to the hospital might have qualified as a land speed record as we rode in terrified silence, with my sister insistently encouraging me to go faster. When we arrived, I parked in the first stall I could find. Tandra was out the passenger door almost before I stopped as she started to dash towards the Emergency door. I thought she'd run straight to the admitting desk, but she stopped to wait just outside the door until I caught up to her, then reached out to take my hand before we went any further.

The admitting nurse seemed to have an attitude problem from the look of her disapproving expression. Despite that look, I tried to put on as happy a face as I could under the circumstances.

"We're looking for Beckie Sommers," I told the nurse. "Which room is she in?"

"Are you family?" she growled at me in a threatening tone.

"No, we're friends of hers."

"If you're not family, I can't give out that information," we were informed in no uncertain terms.

"Umm, she's been specifically asking for us," I added to my information. "Keith and Tandra Hayes?"

"I don't care if you're the President of the United States," she snarled. "If you're not family and can prove it, you're not going anywhere."

I've seen my sister get angry before, but nothing like the look that was on her at that moment. Tandra pushed me aside before giving the nurse her ultimatum.

"Excuse me, but have you ever been admitted to an emergency ward before?" Tandra enquired, her rage barely in check.

"Pardon me?" she was answered.

"Sweetie, either you tell us where Beckie is, or you're going to end up as a patient in here. Do I make myself clear?"

That anger inside my sister said she had all intentions of following up on her threat. I think the nurse understood that, too, because she began to look on her computer screen for a name.

"Room 317," was all she said, but Tandra had me by the hand and was pulling me towards the elevator before my feet could catch up. I almost found myself back on the floor, visions of another head injury floating through my imagination.

As soon as the elevator doors opened, Tandra was out of the door and searching for Beckie's room, pulling me insistently as she looked. Finally finding the right ward, she tentatively opened the door, and I spotted a man of about the same age as our father standing beside one of the beds, his attention focused on the occupant.

"Mr Sommers?" I softly enquired of him.

"Keith? Are you Keith Hayes?"

"Yes, sir, and this is my ... my wife, Tandra." I'd remembered his hesitation over what to call my sister from his phone call, and found myself using the same term he had, but it took some concentration.

"Thank you for coming down on such short notice. Rebecca's resting peacefully now, as they have her on sedatives. But she kept calling your names, almost insisting that I ask you to come down. Oh, and by the way? Call me Carson."

Tandra had taken up a position beside Beckie's bed and was holding her hand while our friend slept from the effects of the sedatives. I could see that Carson Sommers had more on his mind than just his daughter, and invited him out into the hall to get whatever was crowding his mind off his chest and out in the open.

"Has Rebecca told you anything about..." he started to ask.

"Yes, sir, she has," I cut off his question, almost afraid that his words might alert someone that had no business hearing them. "She was pretty happy about the prospects of moving back home with you when she told us before Christmas. We haven't had much chance to talk since then, though."

"Then you know?" he went on, almost afraid of what we'd become privy to.

"Yes, sir. We both do. There's a couple of others, too, but your secret's safe with all of us."

I hesitated before posing the question that rankled inside me. But the information needed to be exchanged, if for no other reason than to establish just where we were in terms of personal safety and security.

"Umm, did Beckie tell you anything about my ... about Tandra and me?"

"Most of it, I'm afraid. But if I have to trust you to keep things quiet, I think you can trust me, too. Rebecca says she was inspired to come back by what she's seen of you two. If that's true, I really owe you my gratitude. I've missed her more than I thought I would."

"Umm, does this mean that you two are..."

I couldn't finish my question, but Carson knew exactly what was on my mind. I think he appreciated the confidentiality I tried to extend.

"Yeah, we are ... sort of. We've been apart from each other for over a year, and we need to go over a lot to catch up. But Rebecca seems to want this as much as I do, and like any father, I don't seem to be capable of denying my little girl anything she wants."

There was an air of resigned hesitancy in how he spoke, as though he wasn't sure that the information should have been shared with a stranger, albeit one that probably knew enough to be a potential threat. It was at that point that I found I wanted to put us on equal footings.

"Carson, Beckie was really looking forward to being with you again. If you two find as much happiness together as Tandra and I do, then we're all in favour of her move. She needs someone in her life, and if you're the person she's chosen, then we'll do whatever we can to protect your ... your position, shall we say. All I ask is that you extend that same discretion towards my ... my wife and I."

"So you'd prefer that I refer to her as your wife, I take it?" Carson asked for clarification.

"Might be easier for all concerned. It's still something that's relatively new for us, too, although Tandra seems to have a better grasp of it than I do. I slip every once in a while, but so far, it hasn't been a problem."

"So, who else knows, Keith?" Beckie's father wanted a full inventory of co-conspirators. I felt that he was entitled to that much to protect his daughter, if nothing else.

"Well, here in Hendrickson, there's Bill Hudson, one of my best friends, Cassie Mansden, my ex-girlfriend and now Bill's girl, and Tanya Hilliard, Beckie's former roommate. Oh, and I think our parents might know, too, I can't remember if I told them or not."

"Your parents?" Carson wanted to know more, his face now taking on a deeper fear of exposure.

"Carson, Tandra and I told our parents about ... about our own relationship over the holidays, and they're fine with it. Our aunt and uncle were visiting for Christmas, which is when my ... wife and I found out that we're not the only siblings in our family living together. So there seems to be that common thread between all of us. It was that fact, and her desire to return to the way things once between you two that convinced Beckie to open the door again. But we all of know the consequences that we could face if things got out. In a way, that's part of what binds us together as close friends. The other is that none of us agree with the societal restraint. So you can be assured that your secret's safe with all of us."

Slowly the look of relief crept over Carson's face, and I could feel myself beginning to relax.

Over the course of the next hour, Carson gave us as much information as he had about Beckie's ordeal, and in the process, began a relationship that would eventually include all of us; one that would have far-reaching effects on our lives.

as Carson told it, someone had found Beckie laying in the snow, almost tripping over her unconscious form as he, or she, walked towards one of the residence buildings. Her father had been told that Beckie's injuries had been kept manageable in part because of the cold, which had lowered her body temperature enough to reduce her heart rate and minimized the damages from internal bleeding in her reproductive tract. Whether she'd require a hysterectomy had yet to be determined. All three of us had our fingers crossed that something that drastic wouldn't become a necessity.

Beckie was released after four days, and while her physical injuries would heal, it was her spirit that needed more time. We'd been told that commuting was out of the question for the next couple of weeks, and the weather reacted accordingly, with several inches of the cold, white stuff covering everything. Tandra and I made our spare room available, not only giving Beckie somewhere to call a temporary home, but also making it possible for us to keep an eye on her.

I guess it was about a week after Beckie moved in that we got a phone call from her Dad, wanting to talk to his daughter. Being a Thursday, the thought of inviting him for the weekend crossed my mind, and I suggested it as an idea for my sister's consideration. She heartily endorsed the idea, leaving it to me to invite the two Sommers'.

"Any chance you could find a double bed?" I enquired of our roommate before telling her of our scheme.

"Why?" she wanted to know.

"Because your Dad is missing you almost as much as you're missing him, but that single bed might be a tad on the small side for two people," I hinted at our idea.

"You mean... ?" she tried to grasp the full impact, her face lighting up like a light bulb.

"Sure. Why not? If it was Tandra in your situation, I'd be doing everything I could to be with my sister. Why would your Dad be any different? It's not like we don't know what's going on between you and your Dad. So call him and let him know that he's more than welcome to spend the weekend here with his daughter. Just let him know that you'll have to share the same bed," I joked with her as I finished our invite.

Beckie was on the phone faster than the Roadrunner running from Wile E. Coyote. Carson seemed a little reluctant to invade or encroach on our privacy, but his daughter finally persuaded him to at least think about it. So neither of us was surprised when we came home from classes the next afternoon to find both Beckie and Carson sitting beside each other on the sofa.

"Keith, I really appreciate you opening your home like this," he began to stammer, "but really, I guess I could have gotten us a hotel room. Rebecca insisted that I stay here, and you know how easily she can convince me to do things her way."

I had to chuckle at his comment, as I was just as guilty whenever my sister gave me those big doe-eyes of hers.

"Just be ready for the rest of the gang to drop in," I warned him. Before he could say anything, the intercom howled. I answered it, hearing Bill and Cassie on the other end. When they came in, I introduced them to Beckie's father, and was glad to see them accept both who he was and what he meant to our temporary roommate.

"Either of you heard from Jay and Tanya lately?" I enquired of our two friends.

"She said she was going to call you sometime this afternoon," Cassie offered. "Didn't she get that far?"

"Nope, haven't heard a peep out of either one of them."

"Call her, Keith," Tandra almost ordered me. "We haven't seen them for a couple of weeks, and I'm beginning to really miss her and Jay. Someone owes us an explanation about where they've been hiding."

It turned out that Tanya and her cousin, Jay, had been busy working on part of a term project for the last few weeks, but jumped at the chance to escape their academic nightmares, and to visit with her ex-roommate again.

"God, Beckie, I'm so sorry I haven't been around, or called," Tanya started to apologize, "but this project seems to be growing every time we look at it. Lousy excuse, I know, but you know what Richardson's like. How are you doing, and don't give me any bullshit. I want the truth."

"Truth?" Beckie weighed the presentational differences before continuing. "I feel like shit. My body's been torn apart, and I still feel violated inside. Girl, if it wasn't for my Dad and the Hayes', I'm not sure I'd have made it this far. I know we talked about what it's like for someone that's been raped, but until you've been through it yourself, you just can't imagine. It's worse that anything we could have thought of, that's for sure."

Carson tried to comfort his daughter as best as he could, and Beckie leaned against his chest in response. Their closeness inspired the rest of us to follow suit with our respective girlfriends. It may not have been quite enough to get Beckie over her self-recriminations, but it did seem to help, and seeing each couple sharing embraces appeared to lift her spirits a bit.

The rest of that evening was dedicated to doing whatever we could to try and raise Beckie's self-esteem up a bit more. She was starting to believe that the attack was something she should and could have prevented, if only by paying more attention to where she was going. By the time the others left just before midnight, she'd calmed down somewhat, but her agitation was sitting just below the surface, ready to burst out at the slightest provocation.

Carson sat at the dining room table after everyone else had left, looking a little lost. I took a seat and invited him to share whatever was on his mind.

"It just feels a little strange to be in someone else's home while wanting to make love to ... to Rebecca, and yet thinking we have to keep our distance for the sake of appearances," he opened up some of his anxiety.

"Yeah, that's how Tandra and I felt when we were at Mom and Dad's that first night at Christmas. But by the time we left, and with our parents' attitude, we were fine. It's the same here. If you and Beckie want to make love, don't worry about us. I'm more concerned with the noise my sister ... I mean, my wife ... makes when she's in the throws of passion. I just hope it doesn't disturb you too much."

Carson had caught my slip-up, and he grinned at me with understanding. If it had been anyone outside our group, and Beckie's Dad seemed to be a new member of it, I'd have panicked. But in this case, it felt almost good to be able to share and relax with relationships that formed a common ground for most of us in the group.

"I guess that's not something that you can shake easily, is it?" he tried to cover my gaffe. "I know that I get confused sometimes between Rebecca being my daughter and her being my lover. It's definitely not a cut-and-dried distinction, at least not for me."

I had to agree that I found myself in the same dilemma over Tandra being my sister. That was something she'd always been, but it had only been a month since she'd become my wife, and I still found myself thinking of her as my lover first and my spouse second. But with each passing day, it became easier. I didn't really care which label I used, though. She was still the love of my life, and I couldn't foresee that changing any time soon.

Carson headed for Beckie's room as I returned to ours, wishing him a good night before closing our door. Tandra was laying on her side, waiting for me, and as I crawled under the covers, she sidled up against my side, then assumed her favourite position. I gently coaxed her lips to where I could kiss them, probing her mouth with my tongue and waiting for her to respond. My wait was mere seconds as I felt her begin to suck on me, then push into my own mouth as we began to dance and duel in a kiss of love and passion.

I'd moved to suckle her nipples, which were only semi-erect this evening, and started to blaze a trail of kisses down her belly towards her sex. But as I kissed the rise of her mons, it became apparent that Tandra's attentions were only partially focused on our lovemaking. As I licked and lapped her slit, I found her slightly moist, but definitely not as wet or aroused as she usually was.

"You okay, Precious?" I raised my head from between her thighs to ask.

"Yeah, I'm ... I'm sorry, Keith," she apologized, her hands guiding me back to her face again. I crawled up the bed, then flopped onto my back and pulled my sister into her favourite position again.

"Something's on your mind tonight, Sis, and it isn't me. Care to tell me what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" I tried to get her to open up.

"I guess it's just ... Keith, I'm worried about Beckie. She's been through hell for the last week, and now she can't seem to get her juices to flow. She's even seen an OB/GYN about it, and they say there's nothing wrong with her physically. We talked about it this afternoon when you and her Dad were yakking to each other. She's afraid that she's losing her ability to have sex."

As soon as she'd explained herself, Tandra rolled her head into my chest, and her tears started to flow like water, their hot sting on my skin demanding that I hold my sister in a show of support and understanding. I let her cry for as long as she wanted, then wiped her tears away with the tip of one finger.

"This will work itself out eventually, Sis," I tried to explain. "Carson's a good man, and he understands some of what his ... what Beckie's been through. He'll do everything he can to help her over this hurdle. Think about it. If it was you, and me instead of Carson, would I leave you to cry, suffer, and be afraid of your own shadow without any concern whatsoever?"

"No, you're right. But if it had been me going through this, you'd try to take care of me, just like you always do. And I know that Mr. Sommers will do the same for Beckie. But it still doesn't change the fact that I'm scared for her, Keith. It's not fair to you, either. A part of me really wants you, but I can't seem to stay in that mood. God, I'm so sorry."

"Hey, stop beating yourself over the head, Sis. Beckie's our friend, and it's only natural that you'd be worried. I'm worried, too. If we can't make love tonight, it's okay. We have our whole lives to be together. Just keep in mind that I love you, Tandra Celeste, for exactly who you are, and at the moment, you're someone that feels compassion for a good friend that's suffering. When I banged my head, we couldn't make love for a couple of days. Did you abandon me? No. You still loved me as much as ever. That's the truth, and you know it."

My sister lifted her head to gaze into my eyes, seeing the truth of my words in them, then leaned forward to express her own love with one of her delicious kisses.

"How the hell can you put up with such a bratty little twerp?" she whispered as we broke our kiss.

"It's not easy, but she's worth it," I whispered back to her, feeling a grin of connection sweeping across my lips. She rested her head on my chest again, then gave me a loving squeeze.

"I don't deserve you," she let her feelings come out.

"I know, but I'll be damned if I'm going to give you up, Mrs. Hayes."

I fell asleep with my sister in that position, only to wake up a couple of hours later from something that sounded like distressed sobbing coming from either the living room or the dining room. I eased myself out from under Tandra and began to head for the door to investigate. As I started to turn the door knob, I remembered that I was still naked, detouring to the ensuite for my robe before going out to see if I could identify that sound. When I got to the dining room, Beckie was sitting by herself at the table, and it was obvious that she'd been there a while. She'd been crying for most of that time.

"Beckie? What's wrong? You okay?"

She looked up at me, her eyes puffy and looking like those of a lost child. I sat at the close end of the table and offered her my hand to hold.

"Keith, what am I going to do?" she began to open up, although I had no idea what on her mind yet.

"Want to talk about it?" I invited her. She hesitated for several minutes before explaining the problem.

"Dad tried to make love to me tonight, and I wanted him so bad. My mind screamed to me to give myself to him, but my body wouldn't let me. He finally gave up and went to sleep, and even though I know, in my heart, that he's not angry with me, I feel so ... so... useless! He's the man that makes my world go around, and I can't even give him my body! What's wrong with me, Keith?"

"Maybe you're trying too hard, Beckie. What those guys did to you, no woman should have to put up with. But wounds like this take time to heal. Give yourself that time. I've had a few conversations with Carson, and I'm convinced that he loves you about as much as I love Tandra. Whatever it takes to help you get over this, he'll do it, and be there beside you through the whole thing. I know it, and you know it."

"But how do I make love to him if I can't even..."

"Tandra explained about you being dry. I think worrying about it is a big part of the problem. Your body's still trying to protect itself, and not being able to get wet is one of the ways. This may be a long shot, but I've got some KY in our room. Why not try that the next time you and your Dad make love, and see if it helps? Something inside me says that once you've physically had each other again, your body might start co-operating, all on its own."

"I ... would I have to use that stuff for the rest of my life?" she tried to make up an excuse.

"I doubt it, but even if you did, would it be so bad? If you could make love to the man that wants you bad enough to jeopardize his own safety, would you pass that up for the sake of a little inconvenience? Somehow, I don't think so. My only worry is that your Dad won't like strawberry."

"Strawberry?" Beckie gave me an uncomprehending look as she asked.

"The stuff's flavoured," I smiled as I filled her in. That smile must have been infectious, because she beamed back at me with the warmest grin I'd seen on her in weeks.

"Look, I'll go find that lube, and when you two get the chance, use it. Like I told Carson, if you're worried about making too much noise, don't be. We have errands to do tomorrow, and I have to work on Sunday, so I'll be gone most of the day. I can let Tandra know what's going on, and I think she'd be more than happy to make herself scarce for a few hours."

I started to get up and head for our bedroom when Beckie trapped my hand in hers, keeping it captive for a moment. I turned back to look at her with the warmest, most caring smile I could generate.

"Keith? I really do appreciate all you guys are doing for me. You two have been the best friends I've ever had. I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to thank you."

"Just give Beckie Sommers time to heal, then go screw your old man's brains out. He deserves it, and so do you. When it happens, I'll be watching for that just-fucked look on your face. That'll be more than enough thanks for me, and for my sister."

"You mean your wife," she corrected me.

"Yeah, her too," I tried to hide my second gaffe of the night, then went to get the tube of lubricant. When I got back, Beckie was looking a lot more at ease. I gave her the tube, then kissed her forehead lightly before returning to bed. She even hummed her happiness for my benefit as I stood up again.

"Go get some sleep," I strongly suggested. "See you in the morning?"

When I got back to our room, Tandra was awake and waiting for my return.