Chapter 24: Snakes Alive

SNAKES ALIVE

(Just as the state animal in Montana is the road construction horse, so too, the state animal in Texas is the road kill armadillo.)

From Texola to Armadillo, there are so many 'used to be' places on the way across the Texas Panhandle.

When questioned about the existence of a place historical, the whittler might say:

"That used to be over there."

"I swear, I can remember when we used to go dancing at the 66 Roadhouse over there."

"Why, yes. Mildred used to have the best milkshakes on 66."

"Johnny would come out to the car, check your tire pressure, check the oil, wash the windshield, fill the tank, while you used the clean restrooms, and had a coke. Yes, sir ... used to be a fine Phillips 66 Station."

"Of course, I remember that." The people who remember that are getting few and far between.

Even though Wendy and David were in a hurry to get to Durango, they weren't in THAT big of a hurry. When anthropologists travel, they want to know what that bare spot of concrete used to be, why that flour mill isn't working, who used to own that building and why isn't it a going concern today.

Instead of notebooks and pencils, they carry cassette recorders in shirt pockets, good cameras, and curious minds. You can learn a lot over a cup of coffee: Every waitress has a story. Every old man, an adventure ... a REAL adventure.

"I remember when," is the 'Once upon a Time' of two centuries ago.

Ask a kid today what they did last night..."World of Warcraft, Dude." or "Spent the night killing Nazis."

Ask an old man what they did when they were teens.

"Snipe hunting."

"Snipe? What's a Snipe?"

"A two cent deposit bottle," and the story begins.

"This was before all that nonsense about littering."

"Friday nights, the working young men with payday in their pockets would be looking to pick up girls. Dragging Main we called it. If they saw an out of county plate with 4 girls in the car, they'd follow it, hollerin' at the girls.

"The girls were out of high school, maybe working jobs of their own, and generally looking for the same thing the young men were looking for ... mates ... or at least practice. If folks were agreeable, pretty soon it'd be two girls and two guys in two cars.

"Let's get some beer and drive out..." Case beer at the tavern was five bucks or less for 24 bottles ... including the 2 cents deposit.

"One thing for sure, you didn't want to get caught with an open container so the empty would go out the window.

"Some Fridays, guys and girls got lucky. Some Saturday mornings they would wake up and hope they could get away without waking the 'luck giver'. ('A two at Ten, is a 10 at Two.' Someone you wouldn't be caught dead with at 10pm looks whole lot better at 2am. That is an unwritten Murphy's Law.)

"All those beer bottles pitched out of car windows on Friday night are a teenagers Saturday fun.

"The first thing you do is raid the furniture. Daddy had a favorite chair he'd nap in. There'd be a weeks worth of change in the cushions. It might only be 35 or 40 cents but it might be a 4 quarters.

"A buck would get you 5 gallons of gas.

"With five gallons you'd drive the backroads real slow. One would be driving, two guys would be sitting on the fenders and looking in the ditch.

"Spot a beer bottle in the ditch?

"'SNIPE!'

The driver never stopped ... he'd just coast along.

"Whoever saw it would jump off the fender, grab the bottle and hand it in the window to whatever girl happened to be adventuring with them. She would put the bottle in a 'shell, ' a beer case, the successful snipe hunter jumps up on the fender and keeps looking.

"24 bottles is 48 cents at any tavern ... plus the shell. Any reasonable Saturday morning hunting Snipe would net you $5.00.

"Five dollars would get you 20 gallons of gas.

"20 gallons of gas would get you to the gravel pit.

"The gravel pit meant 'skinnydippin'.

"Skinnydippin' with an adventurous girl meant you'd at least SEE pussy.

"You might not get to sample it ... but you SAW one. Then again, it might be Hilda, and you'd be wishing she'd wear a swimsuit." He'd chuckle, the waitress would slap him on the back of his head..."Hilda? What'd you do that for?"

"You know what for."

"Yeah, I guess I do."

That brought out a knowing laugh from the entire restaurant.

Growing up in the middle of the industrial age was lots different than growing up in the beginning of the information age.

David and Wendy were rocketing along at under the legal limit and crested one of west Texas's little hills when Wendy saw what looked like a pile of ropes spread out across half the west bound lane.

It was too late to even try to stop so there were disgusting squishes and thumps under the Mercury. One of the 'ropes' bounced off the Ford and trailer and smacked the Dodge right in the windshield.