Chapter 12: Karen

Some bozo had just spent what seemed like half an hour yelling at me. I'm sitting in a booth that's barely big enough for one person, wearing a pin striped shirt and a paper hat I wouldn't be caught dead in anyplace other than at work and he lectures me forever on how I'm screwing everyone by raising the price of gas. Hey, Fucker, I'm sure you make a hell of a lot more than the minimum wage they pay me. I have to pay the same prices for gas that you do.

A year ago someone like him would be unusual. Now I ran across assholes like him two or three times a week. The higher the prices at the pump, the more assholes come out of the woodwork.

At least they communicate with me, even if it is only one way. Most people that come here hardly even notice I exist. I'm just something they hand money to and get change from. Sometimes they demand a receipt and I'd better get it to them damn quick or they act like it's the end of the world.

There was one guy...

I was working the evening shift, so I went up to the window and waved at Jeremy, the old man who worked days. One of the first things they teach us in our two hour training seminar is that you never open up the door to anybody other than your relief person or someone with a corporate picture ID. The company is very security conscious and the facts that a lot of people pay in cash and that we all work alone makes us prime robbery targets. If anyone discovers that we opened the door, much less allowed someone inside, it's grounds for immediate termination. I was surprised when Jeremy told me some kid came out of the woods wearing a sheepskin poncho and asked him to watch over a ram's head for him while he waited for a ride. I was even more surprised that Jeremy agreed to it. The fact that it was on the floor under some shelves on the back wall meant that the door had been opened at some point.

After Jeremy left, I checked it out. I think they call them bighorns. You know, the kind that have curly horns that can climb just about anywhere. They always show two of them going at it, bashing their heads against each other on the nature channel. This one looked like it was still alive. And the part where the body should attach wasn't smooth and flat like I expected. I thought they usually mounted them on some kind of plaque so they could be displayed on a wall. I tried to pick it up but it was like three times as heavy as a bowling ball.

A couple of hours later, this hunk came over to the booth. I knew who he was immediately. There weren't a lot of guys wearing sheepskin parkas that looked alive. The parka I mean; he was definitely alive. When he smiled at me, I thought I was going to die.

He told me his name was Val and that he'd left the sheep's head. I told him it was in the corner. He thanked me and said he'd come back when his ride got here.

He'd taken a couple of steps away from the booth when my brain unfroze enough to start working and I told him he could check it out if he wanted. It sounded totally dumb as soon the words started coming out of my mouth but he said OK and he did.

He was all set to leave when I jumped him. I'd never done anything like this before but I couldn't let him just walk away from me. I held on tight, rubbing his back and his butt while I gave him the best kiss I knew how. He kissed me back and ended up with one hand behind my head and the other holding onto my butt.

I had a small orgasm while he was kissing me. I never have orgasms unless somebody goes down on me for like half an hour. But he gave me one by holding me in his arms and kissing me.

The kiss was just about over when I heard someone say "Are you going to fill her up?

I looked out the window and there was this gorgeous female smiling at him. She was wearing a suede coat that must have cost a fortune. Her jeans looked like they were painted on. I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd pulled out a gun but he just introduced us, she made a joke about us sucking out each other's tonsils, then told me she'd look after him from now on. She was nice about it but there was no doubt she was claiming him for herself.

He took one of the curly horns and picked up the head like it was nothing. I grabbed a credit card app and scribbled my name and cell number on it. I held it out and said "Text me?" He took it, shoved it in his back pocket and then wrapped his free arm around me and pulled me in for another kiss. It wasn't as powerful as the first one and I didn't come from it but it was still one hell of a kiss.

He and his girlfriend, whose name was Bev, walked away, arms around each other, him with a ram's head bouncing on his shoulder blade.

I wanted to bear his children.

I saw him a few weeks later. He showed up at the gas station after he went driving to think things over after a dumb argument with Bev. He didn't even realize where he was until I called him by name.

I'd had some warning because Bev had texted me to call her. Somehow she knew right where he'd go. Unfortunately, it wasn't me he went to but this place. It had some kind of special meaning for him.

I called Bev. We had a good talk and made plans to have a picnic the following weekend.

We did go to the picnic. We started later than we planned because something happened the night before. Bev had a black eye but she was definitely Val's girlfriend. I figured I had no chance. Well, I could always dream.

I watched the asshole get in his car and drive away. The job had always been boring, now it was becoming a pain. Maybe I'd check with the restaurant and see if there were any waitress jobs open. Did people complain about the cost of food? Probably. I heard on the news that when the cost of gas goes up, so does everything that needs to be delivered. Makes sense. But if I was waiting tables, I could at least get some tips. That's something that never happened at the gas station.

It started getting dark and I looked out the window. Black clouds were coming in, faster than I'd ever seen before. I had a fleeting thought that maybe it was the end of the world.

My head hurt. I was lying down and had just woken up. My eyes were still closed but I could see red through my eyelids. I put my hand over my eyes and cautiously opened them, pulling my hand away as I got used to the light. It wasn't anything highly unusual, it was just a really sunny day. The sky was bluer than I'd ever seen it with some fluffy white clouds scattered around. There was no sign of the black clouds which were the last thing I could remember.

It occurred to me that I was lying on the ground. I looked around. I recognized those trees. I saw them every day when I parked my yellow beetle in the employee parking area. What I didn't recognize was the rest of the place. There was no parking lot, no lines of gas and diesel pumps, no truck wash, no restaurant, no showers, no fast food joints, no cars. There wasn't any asphalt and no yellow beetle. All I could see this side of the trees was grass. Not front lawn grass, this was wild and was a foot or two high. There were a few spots where it was green but most of it was turning brown.

Our truck stop is off a business route that has four lanes, two in each direction. It runs parallel to the Interstate, which has six lanes going each way. The Interstate is at a higher level than the street and the truck stop, so it can be seen quite easily from the booth I work in. Well, wear the booth I work in used to be. Since there wasn't any more truck stop, I didn't think I worked there anymore. And that waitress job wasn't gonna happen, either.

If I had to place where the booth used to be, I'd put it right where I was now. It was as if the booth vanished and I fell where I was, maybe hitting my head on the ground. I felt around in back and came across a tender spot. That's why I had a headache.

I looked in the direction of where the highway and the Interstate should be and saw more grass. I walked what I figured was halfway there and saw more of the same.

I thought about the black clouds and the idea I had about it being the end of the world and I got scared. I sat down and cried.

I got most of it out of my system and decided I needed to come up with some kind of plan. Somehow I knew that walking the six miles to my apartment would only get me tired. There was no apartment and there was no town for the apartment to be in.

I've read stories about people suddenly being transported back in time. It was as good an explanation as any. If I was somewhere in the past, it had to be before 1865 because that's when this area was populated. Looking around, it made sense. The sky was cleaner, the trees looked greener, the whole world smelled fresher. The only thing was that the trees looked the same size. Not that I'd taken a tape measure to them, but I saw them every day when I came to work and they looked about the same. They definitely weren't 150 years younger.

Another idea was a parallel universe. An unpopulated Earth, or at least this part of Montana. That could explain the trees being the same size.

Whether it was one of those two or there was some other explanation, I needed to figure out some way to survive. I felt my pockets. A cell phone with no signal. The time and date were blank. I think the phone called the phone company and got those somehow. There wouldn't be any phone company in the past. Who knows what they'd have in a parallel universe. My other pocket had eight dollars and a couple of quarters. My wallet was in my glove compartment in my car. Wherever that was.

The only thing I could see on this side of the trees was grass. If I was a goat, I might be able to live off it, but I wasn't a goat. I headed back towards the trees. I remember Val saying he killed that ram and fed off if a couple of days. I wasn't a hunk like Val but I might be able to find something to eat. Maybe I could surprise a sleeping squirrel or rabbit. Or find a bird's nest and steal some eggs. Some trees have nuts or acorns or something. Maybe I'd get lucky and find some mushrooms that didn't kill me. The point is, it was more likely I'd find something to eat in the forest than out.

I walked around for five days. I was drawn in one direction and every time I wandered away from the path, I'd get pulled back. I stopped fighting it. It could be God, it could be magnetism, it could be instinct, it could be some kind of coincidence. I didn't see any reason not to follow the urge. I found some berries every once in a while. I tried to eat a pine cone but gave up on that real quick. I did come upon a stream so I had water to drink. I saw lots of fish but they were too damn fast for me to catch any of them.

By the fifth day I was feeling tired and weak and I didn't think I was going to make it. I didn't have a trailer full of weapons transport with me and I made a pretty sad pioneer. Hell, I didn't even have a pocket knife. The sun was going down and I was just about ready to collapse when I saw a cave. I couldn't tell you how or why but I felt welcome. Almost like I was coming home. Not to my apartment, not even where I grew up. It's hard to put it into words but if I had to, I'd say it was mankind's home. It sounds weird but that's how I felt.