Chapter 3

I woke up in Heaven, or so it seemed to a combat veteran and bronc rider like me who'd woken up shot up and busted up so often. I had a naked Angel lying atop me and one snuggled onto each shoulder. Compared to the loneliness and solitude I'd lived with most of my life? This was as close to Valhalla as this warrior was likely to see.

I squeezed the two darlings in my arms, then whispered "Morning, Darlings!" to them. This was so much more polite than I used to be back in the war I chuckled. Okay, so I may have rumbled a little, too.

It was enough Cathy stirred and complained, "Wah! It's still dark outside, Falcon. What are you doing awake?"

"Sweetheart, it's like this," I told her, "Bankers go to work at 9:00 a.m. but ranchers and soldiers are up five hours earlier."

Jennifer muttered drowsily, "Excuse me? I thought I signed on as a loan officer?" I laughed so loud at that I nearly bounced little Cathy off my chest!

"Okay, Darlings. I'll give you twenty more minutes to snooze while I put on a pot of coffee." I squirmed out of bed, and went to put a pot on. I noticed my girls instinctively clung together in my absence, Cathy in the middle. Blue and I went outside and took a leak while checking the weather.

I felt like having breakfast burritos, so I washed up, then put two pounds of spicy breakfast sausage, several diced potatoes and an onion in the skillet. By the time it was ready to add a dozen eggs I had made pico de gallo, which is a relish of fresh tomato, onions, jalapenos, and cilantro chopped and combined. My sweet Jennifer walked in and snarled viciously, "Coffee!"

I laughed at her grumbling, kissed her affectionately, and poured her a cup, then showed her where the creamer and sugar I'd bought for them were kept. Sharon and Cathy stumbled in and headed for the coffee pot, and I made a mental note to pack plenty of coffee for our inspection of the back pastures.

"Something smells delicious!" Cathy said, "Maybe I'll save the cantaloupe for later."

I sat the full skillet of sausage, eggs, potatoes, onion, and the pico de gallo, tortillas, and a carton of sour cream on the table, and marveled at how quickly three skinny girls and I made it all vanish! I pointed out to the girls Blue gave us all a sullen look for not sharing.

Sharon drawled in an imitation of the my own speech, "Those weren't no puny city burritos, Falcon Sackett!" My other girls were just as effusive in their praise. They cleaned up behind my cooking efficiently.

Breakfast done, I asked them if they needed any clothing from their car, then decided to get their bags now anyway. We had plenty of room in my dually crew cab truck, and a camper on besides.

My crew complimented me on how well I had hidden their car in the remote cow barn. We were off the ranch in about twenty minutes, and cruising on the highway. The girls argued over which station to listen to on the radio, until I turned on my citizen band radio and told them to light up some bored trucker's life.

They had no idea what to do, so I took the microphone, keyed it, and spoke, "Break 19." A trucker told me to go ahead, I asked, "This is 'Cowboy' here and I have my ranch crew of three lady wranglers with me. They said they've never spoken on a CB with a genuine ratchet-jaw American trucker before."

The trucker came back with, "Well, I've never ratchet-jawed with a lady wrangler before, either. Put those ladies on!" Before I knew it he and those three girls were blowing more smoke than his diesel truck!

I was amazed to learn we were about to embark on the last great Texas trail drive, herding 1,000 head of longhorn steers across Texas, then up to Washington to protest low beef prices.

Cathy laid it on thick when she told the trucker she was expecting a baby, and riding was dreadfully tiring on her back, but she had to endure the long drive and "stand by her man!"

The trucker was all choked up, when he spoke back. "It's people like you who made America great, Little Lady! I wish you all the best and my heart will be on that trail drive with you!"

Cathy thanked him and signed off. I told her, "You made that truckers day, Sweetheart. He's feeling all warm and fuzzy about now."

"Falcon!" Sharon was excited. "I'm going to buy that 'Stand By My Man' song for you to play to Cathy the next time she calls you an ass hole, like she did last night." Cathy took some good natured teasing about that!

We drove into my old friend Jake's driveway, and I stepped out and greeted his cow dog "Bitch" with scratches behind her ears. I let Blue out of the back door of the truck to visit with his family and told the girls it was safe to get out. They did get out, but stayed close to me.

I sung out as I walked in his open front door, "Jake, do you have clothes on? I have women folk with me." I knew better than to ask him if he was decent, he's meaner than I am. Jake appears to be one of the meanest bastards in existence. He looks down on the rest of the world from his near seven foot tall.

He has worked as a cowboy and rancher, a wrestler, and a Harley mechanic. What most of the world doesn't know is the thousands of hours and dollars he donates each year to the "Toys for Tots" Christmas campaigns!

Jake met us just as we entered the kitchen. He said his "Howdy, Ma'am" to each of the girls as I introduced them. He and I both held the girls chairs for them to be seated, then he brought their coffees, I had to get my own. "What did Falcon do, kidnap you beautiful girls?"

They'd figured out how close we were, so they laughed and nodded. Leave it to Cathy, she expanded on it and told Jake, "He said when we trespassed on his ranch and and were damned fool enough to get lost so he had to save us we volunteered to do as he tells us. He takes great care of us in bed and feeds us good, and we love him!"

Jake nearly fell out of his chair laughing! "Sackett," He said, "you are the one man in this world I truly admire!"

I just shrugged and grinned hugely, then asked, "What's a man supposed to do, take three gorgeous virgin runaways to the Sheriff? I kissed them, and they kissed me back and next thing you know we decided we love each other and belong together. It was love at first sight with us."

Jake began laughing again, then asked incredulously, "Virgins, too?"

This time it was Sharon who grinned with her sassy mouth and blew him away. "We all were, until yesterday then we met Falcon!"

Jake was worrying me, I was half afraid he'd hurt himself laughing. He asked next, "So whats the plan now, oh Great One? Are you going to lie up in bed and make baby Sacketts all day?"

Jennifer, bless her little heart, saw the opening and went for it! "Falcon said the plan is to get us each a good dog out of Blue and train us to take good care of our horses and cattle. Meanwhile we will mature enough to have his babes, and increase the Sackett Clan, then he'll have more help and time to make love to his entire crew."

Jake was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes! He said, "How I wish my own daughters had the sense you three dears have shown. They've gone through several men each, all losers! This man, my best friend, who has taken you is committed to you unto death, if you will honor him the same. Now get thee to my back yard and choose yourself each a puppy!"

They all kissed Jake as they walked past him. This meeting had been even more of a success than I'd hoped. They liked Jake and he absolutely adored them.

Jake asked, "Is there going to be trouble with their parents?"

I told him, "I'm certain there will be. I'm thinking of having them write happy reassuring letters home and mail them from a small town a couple of hours away. I'll tell you, Jake, and no one else but them. Each precious moment I spend with them makes up for all the years I've spent in torment alone."

Jake sighed deeply, and asked me, "Can or will the military help you with this, Falcon?"

I considered for a moment, then told him, "They thought I had far exceeded my own limits of endurance and would break one day soon at a critical time, so they certified me as insane. It was a catch-22 sort of thing."

"In essence, they said, 'If you obey orders and do the insane things we tell you to do, you have to be crazy!' It was a tossup for them, whether to discharge me on a total disability, or kill me to keep me quiet about my missions. No one else they controlled had a death wish, they refused to try me on for size."

"Maybe the military won't dare send anyone after you now then." Jake ventured.

I shook my head sadly, then told him, "It's back to the basics, Jake. The old adage 'There never was a horse that couldn't be rode and never was a cowboy that couldn't be thrown?' If it comes down to the government coming after me I'll send my girls as far away as I can, and my Dooms Day plan will begin. It will cost me my soul if it ever comes down to that, I'll have to kill Americans, or be killed."

Jake shouted, "Our bureaucrats suck, Sackett! If they fuck with you, a man who has done so much for America, I'll sell out and move!"

"Don't cut off your nose to spite your face, Jake," I told him, "you stay here and keep on voting."

My darlings came in Jake's back door, each of them had a wide grin on her face, and a frisky puppy clutched between her breasts. They had to show Jake and me all three pups and brag on how smart they were and how much they adored them already. I knew our negotiations would be tough!

Jake started the haggling immediately. "Falcon, you heard me tell these girls to go find their puppies, so I gave them to them fair and square. You aren't even involved in this deal."

"Just a doggone minute here, Mister!" I blustered. "You say you're giving away at least fifteen hundred dollars worth of the best cow dogs in Texas, and I'm wondering why! You haven't gone sweet on one of my wives, or all of them, have you? Girls, did this old pervert slip you his tongue when you kissed him?"

My girls all spoke up, denying it and swore no, he hadn't. Cathy spoke up, quite naturally, and it was in Jake's defense. "Falcon, Jake is a nice man, and he'd never do that to you!"

My face went all contrite looking, I bowed my head, moped, and I told Jake. "Jake, as my youngest wife has wisely pointed out, I wrongly accused you. I hope you will accept this fifteen hundred dollars, my handshake, and my most humble apology for wrongly accusing you?"

Jake laughed, even as he shouted, "No, I won't, you ass hole, but I will accept your hand shake, an apology for your cheating me out of giving the girls the pups, one thousand dollars, and one free breeding to Blue!"

I shouted, "Done!" and extended my hand containing ten hundreds. My three girls applauded the grand finale of our mini-drama. "Oh, Girls. I may need your help in influencing your Uncle Jake to ride with us and give us his sage advice in buying your new saddles and gear. A few more kisses from each of you might help."

My girls smothered Jake in more kisses than he possibly could ever have dreamed about the night before. "If you can wipe that silly grin off your face, Jake," I told my friend, "We'll go buy these girls some rigging. Keep in mind their experience is in English equestrian, but they were taught to do all their show jumps bare back first."

Jake laughed and said good naturedly, "That should help the little cuties with chasing cattle over, under, around, and through blowdown timber on your several thousands of acres of wilderness!"

"That's the exact reason I just invested in three of the best cowdogs in Texas for them, Jake." I told him, "I value my Loves above all else!" Jake and the girls raised their coffee cups to click with mine.

We all loaded up and went by the feed store Jake used to stock up on the kind of dry food he used with the pups. We also bought their collars and leashes there. They wouldn't need them, once back on the ranch. They would stay near their mistresses and any who strayed would be brought home by their own noses.

I explained to the girls their pups would have to be walked on grass about every thirty minutes while we were shopping. "That's but one of the perils of puppy parenting but Blue will help you train his boys."

We went to the saddle shop next, and the first items I found were saddle bags large enough to double part time as puppy tote bags. Those pups wrestled and ran most of their days now, but would still need their sack time until they built their endurance.

The girls had been eyeballing the saddles, and when I headed that direction they beat me there. They found their correct sizes in a sturdy brand, and I asked them, "Can you saddle up this fiberglass horse? I hear he's guaranteed not to kick."

They gave it their best efforts, and even Cathy swung the saddle high enough to get it on. "I'm proud of you all." I told them, "Even 'Little Bit.'" They all got kisses, of course.

They picked out their bridles, blankets, and breast straps. That term had the three of them and Jake giggling. Me? I was laughing, but I've always used one to keep the saddle properly positioned when working stock or in rough country. Both of those conditions applied to us.

We found some good light grazing bits. I explained any horse requiring a harsher bit for control was not allowed on our ranch. A sour horse will get you hurt! We bought some good wide cotton cinches and I intended to train them to keep them clean for their horses comfort.

Oh, I'd almost forgotten to buy leather conditioners for their new leather! Soaking them in lanolin or other good conditioner will protect them from salty sweat and dirt. I chided the girls for not reminding me, but they knew I was teasing, and using it as a training tool.

They then went to look at women's clothing, as I politely thanked the hovering sales clerks for transporting our purchases to the front, as I would expect them to do for anyone purchasing thousands of dollars worth of goods.

The girls had already confided to me, they had all the denims they needed, they'd shop for attractive western shirts, then hats. I watched attentively and admired my wives tastes in clothing.

I did consider them each my wife by then, and understood how my middle-eastern friends could have many wives though I could never think of being harsh to mine as some of them were, except for the very worst of infractions. I attributed the attitude of those middle easterners to having been raised in a society where the man is the absolute ruler in his home. Of course, that happens some places in America, too.