Don't Mess With Jess

by SW MO Hermit

Copyright© 2011 by SW MO Hermit

: Husband away at a seminar accidently finds out his wife is a cheater. He gets even in spades.

Tags: Ma/Fa  

I am a CPA and run my own small business in a farming community. I am, for the moment, married to a beautiful, sexy woman who works part time for her sister who has a local manufacturing plant. A couple of times a year she goes to sales conventions where she and her sister try to sell some of what I call her sisters junk. Other than that she is a stay at home wife. I agreed to let her go with her sister because I felt she needed some family time with her and that gave them a time to get away and visit. I have always hated it when she left, as it was usually a week of lonesomeness for me.

The last two years Paula seemed more excited about her meetings than she had been when she first began going to the conventions. She would begin to become excited about a week or ten days before the meeting and atypically she would demand more frequent sex from me. Now, being a man, I did not complain. Hell, how many husbands really think they get enough pussy from their wives? Surely not me.

What really bothered me though was than when she returned it was usually two or three days before she wanted to have sex with me. Of course since I had not had any during the week she was gone I was horny and wanted some the minute she walked into the house. We had several spirited discussions over her lack of interest upon returning from her meetings. She would cry and tell me she was horny too but she was just so exhausted she only wanted to unwind and sleep when she got home. I would accept this grudgingly because she usually did sleep twelve or fourteen hours a night the first couple of nights after she got home. At least I could snuggle up with her once more.

Normally by Wednesday of the week she returned on Monday she would come to me and fuck my ass off. As the next few days progressed she would become less and less interested in sex until we were back on our normal three times per week average.

Like most accountants who worked on tax returns I go to a short three or four day tax seminar every fall in order to catch up on the latest changes. Last year I went to one about three hours drive away from home so I stayed in the hotel where the seminar was being held. Every evening after the meetings a bunch of us would gather in the bar for several drinks and some serious shoptalk and pussy watching.

This seminar was no different. What was different was it signaled the end of my marriage and of my business. The first evening many of us wandered from table to table networking and deciding whom we wanted to do our serious drinking and visiting with. There were about three men for every woman so those who were hunting the opposite sex tended to gather together. I was happily married and did not go on the hunt.

I was sitting enjoying my evening's refreshment and people watching when one of the female CPA's came up and asked if she could join me. She quickly gave the waitress her drink order then turned and we began discussing the day's topics while we watched the crowd. I saw her glare at one of the men and get the hardest, most angry look on her face I had seen for some time.

I heard her hiss "That fucking asshole."

Being naturally curious I had to ask, "What's the matter Penny?"

"I came to this seminar even though it is four hours farther away from my home than the one I normally attend so I would not have to put up with that bastard and now I see him here. I wonder if he's after another married slut or what?"

After looking in the direction she was looking I had to ask, "Whom are you watching? I can tell you are watching some of the players but I guess I don't understand why it bothers you?"

"That tall blond bastard with the bimbo in the red dress is my husband, my soon to be ex husband I might add. I had suspected he strayed from time to time but last year I finally caught him. We were at the Tax Seminar in Kansas City when I missed him. I had been watching him work the room and flirt with a lot of the women and we had had words. There was a group of manufacturers there also because there was a sales convention in town too. I watched as he left the room with one of the little bitches. I followed them and watched as they went into the lobby and got on the elevator."

"They took the elevator to the fifth floor and it returned empty. No one was on the elevator with them and it did not stop on any other floor. Our room was on two. I took the elevator to the fifth floor and watched until he left her room. She was in a short robe and kissed him when he left over an hour later. She was a mess. I took a few pictures with my phone then ducked into the stairwell to hide."

"I got a PI to watch him for the next two days and he spent some time with the bimbo every evening. Hell, the bastard even had her come into the bar and he squired her around while we had our social hour. My PI managed to get pictures and recordings. When I got home I began divorce proceedings. He is fighting it and making my life miserable. That little tramp he is with tonight is almost the twin of the bimbo he was with last year. He seems to go for the same types every time."

She reached into her purse and grabbed her phone. She turned it on and held it out to me. She said, "Here, look at this picture. This is the bimbo he was fucking last year. Don't you think they look a lot alike?"

I took the phone and felt my stomach clench. I became light headed and my face flushed. Penny noticed my reaction and said, "Jess what's the matter?"

I just sat and stared at the phone as I scrolled through the pictures. I said, "That woman is my wife. I..."

"Oh, crap. I'm sorry Jess. I didn't know. Oh, hell I know how you must feel. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I guess you are but that doesn't help much does it?" I sat and knocked back my drink and motioned for another. I stared into space feeling my stomach roll. Now I knew why my wife acted as she did before and after her trips. I knew if that truly was her and she had fucked the bastard I would divorce her just as Penny was doing her asshole.

After I got myself back under a small amount of control I looked at Penny. "Penny," I said. "Would you be willing to share your PI report? It looks like I'm going to be getting a divorce too. Hell, Paula is at another sales convention right now in Kansas City. I wonder if she is fucking around this time too? Shit. I need to find a PI so I can get it checked out. I'll get back to you OK?"

I started to rise from my seat when Penny reached out and grabbed my forearm. "Jess. Wait. I still have the number of the guys I used and they are in KC. Maybe they can help. I think they still have a copy of the report and it should have pictures of your wife inside. Do you want their number?"

"Yeah, that'd be great," I said.

Penny dialed her phone and began talking to whoever answered. I listened as she explained what she wanted and instructed them to release a copy of her last years surveillance report to me. Then she handed me the phone and I discussed fees and gave my instructions as well as the location of my wife and the convention she was supposedly attending. I gave them my credit card number for the retainer. After I hung up Penny handed me another drink and we sat staring at each other for a few moments.

The next few weeks were pure hell for me. I had received the old report about Penny's husband then a week after that I received the report of this years surveillance. Paula had once again found her a man and spent every evening of the convention fucking his ass off. I even had pictures of her sister with a man to share with my brother in law.

Of course I contacted an attorney and began divorce proceedings. Since I have only been out of college for five years we do not have much in the way of savings or investments. About our only asset is my business and a small equity in our house. I have an IRA but it only has about $10000 in it. We spent money almost as fast as I made it because Paula demanded we furnish our house with expensive items as soon as we could. She also demanded expensive vacations and in truth I didn't mind too much because I liked the travel too.

In any event we didn't have much. What bothered me is that since Paula did not work I was likely to have to pay her alimony. It really pissed me off to think I would be supporting the cheating bitch for years if she chose not to remarry and only play around.

Paula and her attorney were asking for $1500 per month alimony. My business only cleared about $40000 last year. Each year my profits had increased but I had to hire more help this year and I didn't think I would even clear that amount. She would be getting almost half of my profit if she was awarded that alimony.

I had a diabolic idea. Instead of the alimony I instructed my attorney to offer her a share of the business and a resultant pro rata share of the profits. We prepared a chart showing how the profits had increased over the years and projecting them into the future. If things went as they had in the past I would probably be clearing about $60000 within the next two or three years. I smiled inside when I saw the gears turning in my wife's head. She could see herself living very well indeed on half of the profits of my business.

If I made $60000 profit she would receive $30000 as her share. If she took straight alimony she would only get about $18000. To her and her attorney this was a no brainer. We split our little savings and I gave her the equity in the house to protect my small IRA. She received half of the business.


My divorce is finally over. I have moved to a small one-bedroom apartment near my office. I only took a minimum of furniture from our home and Paula made me pay for that since I supposedly gave her the house and furnishings in the settlement.

I sigh and lean my elbows on my desk. I think, now, let's move forward with the plan. I lean back in my chair and feel a diabolic smile cross my face. I laugh as I think of that dumb attorney my wife hired. Unfortunately for the cheating bitch neither she nor her attorney thought of what I had planned. What if I no longer had this business? Half of nothing is nothing isn't it?

I continued to operate the business the rest of the year but I did not try to increase it. In fact, I refused new business. Profits were off a little as I had anticipated because of the extra help I had hired.

I smiled as I signed the distribution check for Paula. Three days after I mailed the check I received a phone call from Paula. Paula was not happy when her pay out was not as projected. She hired another CPA to check my books. They were accurate and he told her so. She was pissed.

After I fielded her irate phone call when she got the CPA report I returned to my toils. I was losing more business and I was beginning to feel the pinch. I had lost some of my old customers because I did not render the speedy, accurate service they were used to. Many of them had to file extensions because I did not complete their tax returns timely. This, of course, reduced this year's profit and will reduce the next year's profits because I did less work.

After I mailed Paula's last profit sharing check for the year I felt my stomach clench. I was on plan but I was not looking forward to fielding the phone calls when she received the check. Once more Paula's share of the profit was less than projected. In fact, it was only about $17000, which was less than she would have received if I had paid the alimony she wanted.

Whooooo. I got the phone call. Once again she was furious and demanded an audit that she had to pay for. This took more of the money from her pocket. Once again my books were accurate.

This time after the audit her CPA told her there might not even be a profit in the next year because I had lost so many customers. Paula came storming into my office after he told her that. "You Bastard," she screamed. "What the hell do you think you're doing? You promised me $30000 a year if I wouldn't demand $1500 a month alimony when you kicked me out. I can't live on the small amount you've been giving me now and my CPA says I might not even get anything next year. You had better begin paying me more or I'm going to sue your ass."

I laughed and said, "Paula I didn't promise you $30000 a year. I promised you half of the company and half of the profits or losses. That's just what you've received. You have had each year audited and I know your auditor told you I gave you your fair share. I'm doing all I can to be fair. Now get your cheating ass out of my office before I call the police."

Four months after our confrontation my business had declined to the point we were losing money. I received another visit from Paula when she received a bill for her share of the losses instead of her quarterly profit check. She was screaming and crying by the time I got her out of the office. Once again I had to suffer through an audit, one that showed I had done nothing wrong. I was laughing inside. Hell, I was laughing in Paula's and her sister's face.

A week after the last audit Paula's father came into the office. He was polite so I was also. After the pleasantries were out of the way and he was seated George said, "Son I know what you're doing. I know you are angry and hurt but what you're doing is wrong too."

I opened my mouth and started to make an angry reply but George held his hand up and continued. "Son I know you're angry with Paula and you got the right but this isn't any way to act now is it? Son she doesn't have a dime to her name and you know it. Hell, she's living with her mother and me now and helping her sister in her business. You can't get blood out of a turnip boy. Don't you think it's time to grow up and let it go?"

I smiled and said, "Yeah George I guess but what about my business. What about that and what she did to me and tried to do to me. Hell, I gave her the house and I hear it is in foreclosure. I gave her half of what we saved and half of my business. I am losing money now too and only have a couple of months of cushion myself. Customers are leaving in droves because I can't keep up and can't afford to hire more help. Your daughter caused that."

"Son what would it take for you to stop this nonsense?"

I smiled to myself and leaned back in my chair. I rubbed my chin then leaned forward and placed my forearms on my desk. "George I'm doing the best I can. Tell you what. Tell her I'll take her fifty percent of the business back and forgive the operating expenses she owes me if she pays me $20000. I may still go down the tubes here but that will at least limit her losses."

George looked at me and said, "Jess you know she doesn't have that kind of money."

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