Chapter 6

I walked into the living room where I saw Beth looking down at a lamp in pieces on the floor. Luckily, it was one of the ugliest pieces of furniture we had—a spur-of-the-moment, thrift store purchase, its only purpose to help light a dark corner of the room. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you looked at it, the table it had been sitting on was a little unstable and stuck just far enough into the hallway that bumping it wasn't unusual. The fact that Beth wasn't real steady on her feet at the moment didn't help.

"Damn piece of shit! Now I gotta clean up the <hic> mess."

Hmm. Was my lady a little under the influence? As she tottered across the room I thought back to our experience on Bimini. Her current gait looked suspiciously similar to our trip back to the boat that memorable night.

"Hi, there," I said.

She spun around and almost fell over. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"Sorry, I just heard the crash and wanted to see what had happened."

"Looks like I broke that ugly damn lamp. D-do I get a kiss or a spanking for gettin' rid of it?" She teetered toward me, tripped and fell into my arms.

"Whee! Let's dance!"

"I think you better sit down before you fall down," I said as I steered her toward the nearest chair.

Suddenly her face changed. "Not gonna fall down. Gonna throw up," she mumbled as she pulled out of my grasp and ran/stumbled into the bathroom where I could hear her through the closed door conversing with Ralph O'Rourke.

With a sigh, I grabbed the broom and dustpan and swept up the remains of the lamp. By the time I got back from the garbage can Beth had finished in the bathroom. I found her collapsed—fully clothed—diagonally across the bed, snoring in a most un-ladylike rumble. I thought of my MP3 recorder—the one I used for taking notes in class. If I were really nasty ... Instead, I took pity on my inebriated lady, covered her with a blanket, and stretched out next to her.

Saturday morning I climbed quietly out of bed. Beth was lying in the same spot. She'd stopped snoring but a little line of drool was puddling on the back of her hand. I had a feeling she was going to regret last night when she finally woke up.

I was just opening the morning paper when something that had been picking at me popped into my head—why had Beth come in the front door last night? The back door was just steps from the garage. Unless...

From the kitchen window I could see that the garage door was closed, which proved nothing. I walked to the living room and looked out only to see Beth's ride sort of parked at the curb—if by parked you mean one wheel up on the curb and the rear of the Jeep at least two feet out in the street. With a sigh, I walked out, backed her vehicle off the sidewalk and pulled it into the driveway. Last night must have really been something. But what? I had a pretty good idea of the "why."

It was close to noon before my lady stumbled into the kitchen, her favorite ratty old bathrobe wrapped around her.

"Go ahead and say it," she said with a moan.

I sat there trying to decide whether I was more scared or angry at what had happened the previous night. I really wanted to unload on her, but I didn't see any purpose to it.

"Come on, Tommy, say something!"

"Thanks for taking out the lamp," I replied. "I never liked that damn thing."

Watching her expression change almost got me laughing—confusion, anger, with maybe a little bafflement tossed in, ending with relief.

"Oh, you goof!" she said as she landed in my lap. "Tommy, I really messed up last night, didn't I." I tried to ignore the feeling her wiggling was generating.

"Yes, you did. Where were you, anyway?"

"You knew I had a rehearsal last night. I told you yesterday before I ... Oh, shit, I didn't mention it, did I? I'm sorry."

"No, you didn't tell me, at least not about a rehearsal. You were too busy telling me what an unfeeling oaf I am and trying to ring my bell."

I saw her wince and almost felt bad for reminding her of yesterday's tantrum ... almost.

"Oh, God. Why do you put up with me? I was just so upset over losing Pye that I took it out on you even though you were just trying to help."

"Yes, you did. Beth, we're going to have to figure out why things like that happen. If you're going to think I'm always in the wrong maybe we don't belong together."

"Oh, Tommy! Don't say things like that! It's not funny!"

"It wasn't meant to be funny. I'm tired of always being your whipping boy."

A look of abject panic washed over her face.

"Beth, whenever something goes wrong, why am I always the one at fault?"

"Tommy, you're not! I ... oh, God. Am I really that bad? Always blaming you?"

I just sat there, looking at her as she thought back. I could tell when she admitted to herself that I was often the undeserving object of her anger. She got off my lap and walked across the kitchen from me then turned and looked back. "Oh, Tommy. I'm sorry," she said, tears in her eyes.

"What are you going to do about it?" I asked.

"I-I don't know. Please believe me, I don't mean it! I just ... I just..." she ran down.

"Beth, I know I'm wrong some times, but it gets tiring always being the fall guy when something happens. Did you really think I was happy when Pye went home with the Kowalskis, that I didn't want him around?"

She just shook her head.

"But you unloaded on me. Why?"

"I-I guess it was because I was really upset and you were here ... and ... and I knew you'd understand and forgive me." Her voice broke as she buried her face in her hands.

"Beth, what am I going to do with you?" I asked as I took her in my arms. Was she going to change? Was my face safe? Time would tell.

After she calmed down I figured it would be safe to grill her a little.

"So you went out with the gang after rehearsal, right? How is the Oily Cart group?"

"Same as ever. Steve has some ideas for a little more audience participation. More than just shouting ideas."

"So some poor schlub in the audience could end up like you did for your audition—dragged up on stage and dropped into a skit with no warning?"

"Yeah, sort of like that."

"Remind me to sit in the back." The thought of acting without a script terrified me.

"And I guess I had a couple of drinks," she added, sheepishly.

"Just a couple? Is that why you left the Jeep in the street?"

"I did?"

I just nodded.

"So THAT'S why I came in the front door..." she mumbled to herself. "And the lamp?"

"Took it right out. Best thing could that have happened to it," I chuckled.

"Tommy, it's not funny! God, I can't believe I drank that much. What if I'd been picked up on the way home?"

"I thought you were giving up drinking after our evening in Bimini? At least that's what you told Sue and Bob—that you weren't going to drink any more."

"I didn't mean to have anything last night, but everybody else did and I guess I let them talk me into it." I could tell the admission embarrassed her.

"So you let them talk you into drinking? Come on, Beth. When was the last time anybody talked you into doing something you didn't want to?"

"Well, there was that Saturday with the black bikini..."

"Damn it, Beth, I'm serious! If you drank last night it was because you wanted to, not because somebody talked you into it.

"I wish you would have at least called me. I could have picked you up. I'm sure the Jeep wouldn't be the first vehicle to be left in the lot overnight."

Beth looked even more uncomfortable. "Tommy, I-I couldn't call you ... I was too embarrassed."

"Embarrassed? Why?"

"Because of what I did to you. Tommy, once I calmed down I knew you missed that little furball as much as I did, but ... Oh, dammitall anyway!" she wound down. "I'm sorry. I really am."

"I know you are. Now just remember that the next time you're thinking of taking a couple layers off my face."

I was loading one of the images from the catalog project when I remembered my conversation with Val and her request.

"Beth, I talked to Val this week and guess what? She's engaged!"

"She is? Great! Brad?"

'Yeah, he asked her over the summer and she asked me to ask you if you'd ... well ... Beth, she wants you to be her maid of honor." There it was, out in the open. Now what kind of reaction would I get?

Beth's face went through so many different emotions I couldn't keep up. After a few seconds I realized I was holding my breath. I hadn't meant to come right out and ask her, just do a little prep work for Val.

"Tommy, why me? I mean I really don't even know her that well."

"She sounded like she didn't know who else to ask. You know her family situation. I mean with her parents pretty much ignoring her. I guess they're not even going to come to the wedding, let alone pay for anything. She doesn't have any sisters and I don't know about cousins or anything like that. I guess you're the closest friend she's got."

"Should I do it?"

Nothing like sticking me on the hot seat. "Beth, I don't know. I mean it's really up to you, but I know Val would really appreciate it."

"I wonder if she'd be around today?"

"Call and find out."

Ten minutes later Beth was out the door and on her way to Val's. I wondered what the outcome would be.

I was in the garage cleaning out my Jeep when Beth returned. "Tommy, tell me if I'm crazy. I just told Val I'd do it."

"Why would that make you crazy? I mean, sure, with the way Val and I started off, I can see where some people might think it would be a little weird for you to accept her offer, but if you're comfortable with it, who cares what anybody else thinks?"

"How about you?" she asked.

"Me? Why should I be bothered?"

"Well, like you said, your first encounters with her were a little, er, uncomfortable."

"Yeah, but since the party where you talked to her she's acted more like a friend, not the predatory vixen I first met."

"So you don't have any problem if I do it?"

"Nope. I think there's a certain symmetry in the whole thing, since it was the two of us who sort of got them together in the first place.

"By the way, when is the wedding?"

"Oh, not until school's out next spring."

"You going to offer the farm or is that reserved for our wedding?"

Beth just giggled and grabbed me for what turned into some serious face time.

"AHEM. Are we interrupting something?"

We turned around and saw Cindy and Greg standing there with huge grins on their faces.

"Don't sneak up on people like that!" Beth said.

"Sneak up?" Cindy chuckled. "A brass band could have snuck up on the two of you!"

"So now that you interrupted Beth's attempt at seduction, what's up with you two?" I asked.

"Oh, not much," Greg replied. "At least not what's 'up' with you." The problem with friends is you can't kill them without getting talked about—even when they REALLY deserve it.

The next thing I knew the three of them had decided it had been a while since we'd been to the Pizza Palace and since I'd just done such a stellar job of cleaning out my ride, guess who was elected to drive?

"Well, if it isn't the Four Musketeers," Jeanie said as we walked in. "It's been a while."

"Yeah, well, they've been keeping us pretty busy at school," Greg replied.

"Oh, let me get my violin!" Jeanie replied with a laugh. "I'd like to give you your favorite booth, but it's already taken," she added.

"Oh, that's okay," my lady said. "I hear the pizza's just as good out in the other room."

Jeanie took us to a four-top in the main room and left to get our drinks.

"Can you believe she's been here for over forty years?" Cindy said.

"Well, I have been." Cindy almost jumped out of her chair as Jeanie came up with our drinks. "But you won't have to put up with me much longer."

"Huh?" "What?" "Jeanie!" We all looked at our favorite waitress. "Are you retiring?"

"Yup. Gonna turn things over to the kids."

"The kids?"

"Yeah, Janine," Jeanie nodded at one of the other servers, "is my granddaughter-in-law and Albert, er, Alphonse, the manager, is my son."

The four of us just stared at her.

"Jeanie, what is this, a family affair?" Beth asked.

"Well ... yeah," she replied with a sheepish grin.

"I suppose I should come clean. You see, I bought this place about fifteen years ago. The original owner wanted to retire and gave me a chance to buy the place at a good price."

"Yeahbut, if you own it, why work as a waitress?" I asked.

"I like serving folks. I'm good at it and enjoy it. I almost didn't buy the place because I didn't want to have to do the paperwork all the time. I was afraid it would keep me off the floor, but my nephew's got an accounting degree and agreed to come onboard and take care of all the figuring."

"So this really IS a family restaurant," Beth said with a chuckle.

"Yup, I guess it is."

"Why did you keep it secret?" Cindy wanted to know.

"I didn't think everybody needed to know. It's not a secret, just something I've never made a point of telling everybody who walked in the door.

"Besides, people act differently when they know they're talking to the owner. This way I can get a better feel for how things are going."

The four of us looked at each other. What other surprises were in store for us?

"I wonder if our folks know?" Beth said after Jeanie took our order.

"About Jeanie retiring, or her owning the Palace?" I asked.

"Both."

Eventually Jeanie came back with our pies and we all dug in.

"So, what are you guys doing for Halloween?" Greg asked between bites.

Beth and I looked at each other. "Um, we really didn't have any plans," I replied. "I'm sure the frat rats will have their usual drunken blast, although I'm not sure where."

The previous year there'd been so many arrests for under-age drinking that the University had outlawed any alcohol in fraternity and sorority houses. Not that that was going to stop anybody from throwing a party that wasn't in one of the official houses. Plenty of fraternity guys were "townies" and I was sure finding a place off-campus wasn't going to tax anyone's ingenuity.

"Tommy," Beth said as she gave me one of her "pretty please" looks, "I was thinking about dressing up, staying home, and getting a bunch of candy for the neighborhood kids."