Chapter 46: The End of Summer

I didn't wake up till long after the sun had. I felt sore and still mentally tired.

"Billy?" I called, looking about.

On the bedside stand there was a folded note: Rest well, help yourself to anything. I'll be just downstairs seeing to the horses. If you need me just call.

Billy

No Molly, No Cleo, and No Eddie. I rubbed my hands over my face and sighed. It's what I needed.

"Billy, I'll take you up on your offer." I said to the note and went to his bath tub and turned on the taps.

I smelled his soap and smiled. "Irish Spring." I found the towels and when the tub finally filled, I sank in till I was chin deep, ahh pure delight. "I'm only getting out if the place is on fire, maybe."

What the hell had happened? I was fine till I stepped in the bathroom then I felt almost afraid. But afraid of what? And where in hell had Eddie been? I closed my eyes and was instantly bombarded with images from the night before. Oh My. Had that really been me?

My mind raced with it's thoughts. Why did I feel so spent? There wasn't emotion involved with any of what had happened. Was that why? Was it because it was too cold? Where had Eddie been? Had he been there would things have ended differently? Was it only too much for one night?

With Eddie I always felt kinda ... I couldn't pin point a word to the feeling. Several terms I came up with were close, like safe, secure, protected, brave and sexy. Yet it was more than that. I always felt like I had to show off how worldly I was. Was it the "anything you can do I can do better" kinda thing? Or did it have anything to with Eddie at all?

I had no trouble last night telling Scott and Charlie to get it on. I was in charge and enjoyed every second of it all! But I don't want to anymore.

I opened my eyes in the tub. I looked at the cool tile across from me and it dawned on me. That it's that simple. I don't want it anymore. It was great, it was fun but I've had enough. Maybe I was trying to show both my mind and my body that I wasn't going to sit home and rot because Derek screwed me over? I had. I'd done that. I don't want anymore of Jake's parties. I don't want anymore nude trips to town.

I shoved my hair back and reached for his shampoo. With a glob in my hair now the room filled with one of Billy's scents. He always smelled like a combination of many things, horses that were in his blood, leather that he held and touched all day everyday. Sweat, the man worked as hard as his horses did, sometimes harder. I dunked back under, like a small child, rinsing his shampoo from my hair.

I soaped up using his bar, making sure my body was as clean as I could make it with soap and water alone. I forced my mind to attend it's task. Each toe was scrubbed even in between. I don't think I'd spent this much attention to my bath since I was 7 and got caught in the garden making mud castles. I rinsed off completely and stepped out of the tepid water, pulling the plug.

Wrapped in a towel I stood in front of the mirror pulling a comb through my hair. I'm lucky. I didn't promise Eddie anything. He leaves next week and his life will resume. If I'd learned anything from Derek it was my life would go on as well. And just like with Derek, I was a bit more educated than I was before. I pushed my wet hair off of my shoulder to dry behind me.

By the time I slipped back into my flannel shirt, correction, Billy's shirt, I was feeling much better, both with what I did, and who I was. It was time to rummage through his fridge.

"Hmmm not bad." I said to the fridge. "OJ, Milk, hey it's not even outdated." I smiled at the plastic carton. "Cheese, that will work." I took out the cheese. "Pepsi, Good man." I grabbed a can. "Butter, and if he has bread..."

"I do."

I screamed and dropped the Pepsi. It rolled across the floor to rest by his boot. "Ah. I ... I'm sorry. Damn you scared me."

"I wouldn't drink this one." Billy exchanged the soda for another, brushing by me to reach the fridge.

"Thanks. I was going to fry up some grilled cheese." I said with a shrug.

"Good idea." Billy sat and waited.

I smiled happy he was leaving that at that. "Pan?"

"Oven."

In no time I had sandwiches made and served up on paper towels.

"Glad to see you better today." Billy bite into his.

"Much. I took a bath."

"Ah yes. The cure all for a woman kind." Billy teased. "If they'd figure out how to bottle that, all the worlds problems would be solved."

In answer I tossed a rolled up towel at his head.

"Not going to ask about last night?" I ventured carefully, my eyes on my food.

His answer took a bit in coming. Billy bit into his sandwich, melted cheese dripping down his chin.

"Well. I know what the party was about. Which is why I drove you myself." He shrugged and wiped the cheese away. "Anything else is yours to tell, or not." He took a big drink from the Pepsi can.

How did one manage to keep things so simple? He was right of course. It was my business. And he did know it was a sex party, basically. I couldn't very well tell him I didn't know what was going to happen at the party. Although I didn't, not really. But I did.

"It started out storybook." I began. "I loved dressing up and feeling grand. The role playing was fun too. I've never seen people on such good behavior before." Picking at crumbs I continued. "The dinner remarkable. Not just the food but the room, the table the candle light, the manners ... I dunno. The feeling of the whole thing. You know?"

I looked at Billy. His arms were crossed, food finished, elbows on the table, just waiting. He gave a little nod.

"Then the dance started. Oh my. The room was done so grandly. I can't say it was historical but it felt like ... I dunno. It was close enough you know? Had it been at the big house it would have perfect. The music, again not true songs from the 1850's but the feeling they created with the gowns and the candles and the..." I smiled and looked at Billy. "Yeah. It was nice."

I fidgeted and finally got up to clean the pan. There was no way I was going to tell him about the Creeper. I wiped off the counters and again, Billy just waited. The entire process didn't take half the time I wished it to.

Yet, I spoke again. "It seemed to change then. I'm not sure I can explain it." Not sure I wanted to as much as I had to.

"If you remember high school, and how you'd dream some nasty little sexy dream of the capt of the football team, well, you being a guy it was the cheerleader." I smiled at him.

"Well things like that started to happen." I shrugged. "You know, it's Jake's place."

I sat back down, being sure to tuck the shirt tail under my ass.

"Couple's started exposing more and doing more and well, you've seen it. The mood changed from a girls fairy tale dance into..." I shrugged.

"Later." I swallowed and began again. "At midnight I was taken in a room and set up there with everything I'd need."

To make it easier Billy said, "You didn't pass out keys."

I shook my head, relieved he knew, embarassed he knew what it had been.

"I didn't understand them. I waited and waited, hell I'd even fallen asleep. But no one came in."

I tossed my empty can in the trash, nervous.

"Then suddenly I had several visitors. But no Eddie, no Cleo. I ... There wasn't a guide book for ... I mean ... Then..."

I shrugged. How do you tell someone that you were fucked in the ass and cunt till you couldn't take it anymore?

"Eventually I fainted. When I woke up things had continued without me. Even more so. There were twisted bodies engaged in all sorts of things." I waved my hand in the hair to vaguely describe 'things'. It wasn't my place to explain about Scott and Charlie's first shot at bi sexual relations.

"Well, things continued." I spoke haltingly, images of Earls head between my thighs popped to the front of my mind. "I must say, I had the best mind blowing sex I'd ever even dreamed of."

I finished quickly before daring a look at Billy. I hated it but I knew my skin was flushed to a deep hue of red.

Billy nodded, waiting.

I blinked at him. We both sat there a moment, saying nothing.

Billy sat up straight now. "Come here."

I stood up and took the two steps into his arms. I was encircled and held.

"And what do you want from me Kat? Do you want me to ask for details?"

I shook my head against his chest.

"Do you want me to spank you for being a bad girl?"

I snorted a bit of muffled laughter into his chest.

"What?" I couldn't see it, but Billy was smiling.

"I don't know. I just." I shrugged inside his hug. "Know I guess."

Billy nodded against my head. "I know." He petted my hair. "A guest of Jake's place, how could I not know? Jake's end of the year party and you came out at nearly 4 am, how could I not know."

"You and I fight so much, but you're always playing the Hero to me." I was relieved he wasn't going maybe judge me, or I didn't know why else I would be relieved, but I was.

"Go back to bed. Believe it or not you'll sleep. I'll be back up for dinner."

And I did. I went back to his bed and fell asleep, not as deeply as I had the first time. This was more a light escaping of the mind.

When I awoke I was shocked to find the shadows already lengthening. On the foot of the bed a small pile of my clothes topped off with my toothbrush. I smiled, he'd sent to Molly for my things. I slipped into my own clothes and dropped his shirt in his dirty clothes basket. Feeling better covered and well rested. I scrubbed my teeth till they felt as clean and fresh as they could. When finished I came out into the living area, a spring in my step, expecting to find Billy sitting back on the sofa. The place was empty.