Chapter 4: Gottcha

We settle down to a pattern. It is wonderful comfortable pattern; Sexual education with Maggie in the mornings, then I will wander around looking for people to met and things to do. Not only do I meet Latches but I meet the sanitation crew, it is a two man crew that have the unlikely names of Rosecrans and Guildenstern. I meet the brew master, a lovely lady named Zebeth.

Although the winter is not as harsh as I remember it to be, it is still cold more days than not so I spend many of my days in the kitchen with Latches, or down in the library reading and making notes of my few weeks of travel. Maggie, the dear girl She has taken to following me around. I guess hero-worship and sex don't make for solitude living. So she keeps me company when I am in the library, She has a billion question and seems to come up with a billion more every day.

"What was space like?" She asks.

"cold and lonely," I say

"Oh come on Nosis, how can you be like that, you say you were in space. I believe you but, I'm not sure about others." she whines at me. I almost think about trying to kiss that pout away until I catch a glimpse of Socrates and he is shaking his finger at me. That stupid no necking policy in the library. I frown at him.

"Nosis. Did you hear what I said?" Maggie asks, drawing me back to her pouting lips.

"I did, and I am not sure I care," I take her hands in mine. "Maggie. I am not even sure what happened to me. My memories from before are--" I sigh as I try to find the least damning word. "scrambled, and I am not sure if I want to remember, at least not right now."

"That can't be good for you," she says with all seriousness, the cheeky thing, she sounds like Nimrod.

"No it is not. But neither is what happened to me." I say and let her hear some of the sadness I should be feeling.

"OK so no space, what about when you were a kid, like me?" she takes a new tack.

Now I laugh, "I was nothing like you. I was a good kid. I never got in trouble. And-- Well my life was very different."

"Different?" she pries.

"I lived in a big city. I do not know if that city is even still around. It most likely was destroyed." I say. This time I can let the memories come up with non of the pain and confusion that I had been experiencing. I blink as let the images wash over me.

Playing with my brothers in the park as the sun light surrounds us. Sitting at my father's work, waiting for my mother to pick me up after school. But there are all very early memories. They are the ones I savored as I went through my training.

I try to dig a little deeper. I know I was close to Maggie's age or maybe younger.

But what I remember is that the world around me was-- safe. I felt safe. So when the flash of light that was so bright that it burned through my eyelids I was more shocked, then frightened.

Was it a surprise attack? I ask myself for the first time.

"Chronos? Nosis, Please, please answer me." Maggie's soft, slightly panicked voice breaks through my thoughts.

"Yes, Maggie." I say and blink her into focus.

"Oh goddess," she throws her arms around me and gives a small cry. " I was so worried. You stopped moving. I couldn't tell if you were breathing. Don't do that to me," she sobs at me.

I wrap her in a hug and pull her down on to my lap. "I am fine. I was just remembering. Everything is fine now."

I brush her hair and gently rub her back. I feel someone else near by and look to see who it is. Socrates and standing next to the small table we had been working at. He too looks worried. But when he sees me looking at him, he pulls a face and walks away.